all of my pregnancies have been really "easy" compared to most. I've heard horror stories about morning sickness and having to stay in bed all day etc. I am grateful to say that I have had it easy! the worst thing I can complain about is being extremely tired! this last pregnancy was no different. everything was great ... every time I went to the doctor's office I was in excellent condition; my blood pressure was normal, my weight was moving along just fine, there was ALWAYS a baby's heartbeat and there was NEVER any bleeding. so when I went to the restroom and discovered blood (a significant amount) I worried. Jose and I decided to go to the hospital and see what all the fuss was about. we honestly thought that maybe baby Anjelah was going to be born early. when I got there the first thing they did was check for a heartbeat and the nurse couldn't find one. then she brought in an ultrasound sound machine (kind of old school) and she still couldn't find it and on top of that there was no movement from baby. she then brought in the doctor on call and he checked for about 15 minutes. those 15 minutes seemed like hours to me, I just wanted to know what was wrong. the doctor then said, "I don't have good news for you. I am sorry for your loss."
my heart sank! I felt like I couldn't breathe, like someone knocked the air out of me. "I am sorry for your loss." what loss? what are you talking about? then they took me to an ultrasound technician to confirm the news. the ultrasound was so much clearer and a lot more modern. I was still hoping they were wrong but when I saw a "flat line" to confirm for heartbeat I knew baby Anjelah was gone. after that everything else happened so fast. they explained 1000 things to me at once and my brain was spinning. they gave Jose and I so much information that it took us a while to process what was happening. Jose felt the same way, so confused and so sad but there was no time to deal with the sadness. we had to make decisions and deal with the pain of labor (I opted for NO epidural). so after being induced I gave birth to baby Anjelah on September 12th at 11:30 a.m. she was so, so tiny. her fragile little body was complete ... she had her 10 fingers and toes and even her two little ears. she was so perfect! Jose and I got to hold her and make a few memories with her. Jose gave her a father's blessing and we were able to feel the spirit of the Lord with us.
I went to the doctor this past Friday and they have no answers for us. they drew tons of blood when I was at the hospital and I was hoping for some results but all my blood work came back negative. no one knows exactly what happened! I guess it's just one of those things but man does it hurt! we have had tons of friends and family come over and we are extremely grateful for ALL they have done for us. we feel truly blessed for all we have and all we don't have. we know in our heart of hearts that we will see Anjelah Bailey again.
THANKS FOR ALL YOUR PRAYERS, YOUR THOUGHTS AND FOR ALL YOUR HELP!
taking the journey together! 
