One day I loved writing it... and I thought that I could put some interesting, dare I even say funny, stories out into the world that people might enjoy reading. And then the next minute the thought of sitting down and trying to construct my thoughts into some kind of interesting anecdote, let alone a coherent sentence, was more than I could stand.
Yes, I have been mostly absent for a long time. There has been the occasional update on Ally. I must write those. I cherish those. (When she is a "NO" screaming two year old running around my house butt naked and covered head to toe in my makeup that I thought I had hidden away high enough I know I will need those cute, innocent little stories to save my sanity). And, it is just so fun to remember...
And then there was the ill-fated attempt at the daily picture. I thought it was a good idea at the time. That is all we will say about that.
But, I have missed documenting birthdays and family vacations and moving and potty training and preschool and...LIFE!
I have spent some time the last few days pondering on where all my motivation and creativity and time has gone.
- The easiest answer is to simply say that I have discovered Downton Abbey.
- Also, the decline in my writing has a direct correlation with the increase in my couch sitting time. We bought a very comfortable couch at the exact same time I started to feel that writing this blog was a chore
- Oh yes, and about the time that we purchased this new couch and my desire to "just sit and do nothing!" jumped fourfold, we added number 4 to our happy, little clan. Lack of sleep and increased exposure to diaper duty has a way of killing the creative in you.
This makes me sad! I love this blog! And, we have so many friends and family that live faraway and look to this blog to stay updated on our family. And, I love looking back at past posts and remembering what was happening and how I was feeling. I love being reminded of stories I have forgotten about. I really like being creative and trying to be witty and trying to tell a story that somebody thinks is interesting enough to read.
But, the longer I didn't write the more overwhelming it became to tackle it all again. And now I am to the point that I am wondering if anybody would even notice or care if I just didn't post anymore. After all, we all have Facebook, right?
But, here's the truth: I don't write this blog for anybody but me. Sure, I hope I have some kind of a following. And, I hope those that do follow are entertained and informed. But really, I started this blog as a journal of sorts for myself. There are things that I want and need to write down so I can remember when I begin to forget.
Ally is sleeping through the night for the most part now. The move is nearly complete. And, I am feeling a need to get back to who I am. And to me that means writing. So, this is my personal goal publicly proclaimed. I am going to try to write more.
Now, should we all start taking bets on how long my motivation is going to last?
