Berubah

Di kala, mata terkebil kebil menahan dari terlelap...hati pula resah menanti jawapan yang tidak kunjung tiba...menatap paparan skrin yang penuh dengan kehidupan yang tidak pernah disangka...penuh dengan kerja, penuh dengan kelekaan, dan penuh dengan pertanyaan... Tersentap sebentar, aku terbayang suasana yang dapat menenangkan jiwa menghilangkan resah... terbayang si manis berada di segenap hati, teringat pula kata kata yang perit dan berat tuk diterima hati...

Kata kata yang ada benarnya serta amat pahit untuk ditelan kerana diri sudah tegar dengan kekusutan ini, kadang kadang terasa seperti diri ini memang khas untuk Kusut, tapi kadang kadang rasakan diri ini bukan sebegitu...apa yang diri ini perlukan sebenarnya?....

Si diri ini perlukan kepercayaan, kepercayaan bahawa dia tahu, kepercayaan bahawa dia tengah berusaha, kepercayaan bahawa dia sentiasa perlukan kekuatan,kesedaran, semangat dan dorongan.
Si diri ini perlukan kekuatan, kekuatan untuk akui apakah benar diri ini dicipta seperti yang dipersoalkan, seperti yang diperkatakan, seperti yang diharapkan....
Si diri ini perlukan kesedaran, kesedaran untuk menyedari apakah dia mampu, apakah dia salah, apakah dia mahu...
Si diri ini perlukan semangat, semangat untuk terus mempercayai, semangat untuk teruskan kekuatan dan semangat untuk terus sedar dan berjaga untuk menjadi seseorang yang terbaik....tak kurang juga...
Si diri ini perlukan sokongan dan kata kata dorongan supaya terus percaya....

Percaya bahawa susah untuk berubah, tiada jalan mudah untuk berubah, tetapi tidak mustahil untuk berubah menjadi seseorang yang lebih baik.

P/S: Jalannya tak mudah kerna ia untuk sesuatu yang berkekalan selama-lamanya..

Impian Zombie ku (Harapan atau Perancangan)

Mak, nanti bila abang besar...abang nak jadi pilot, bawak jet pejuang macam dalam tv(lakonan TOM CRUISE)...Mak jawab "bahaya la...nanti terhempas, tgk berita bersepah pilot mati terhempas, bahaya!", okla okla...abg jadi pilot bawak kapal jumbo tu la asalkan leh terbang...Mak terdiam seketika dan ..."belajar dulu betul betul kat skolah, nanti senang nak jadi pape..." Begitulah saat pertama kali aku merancang kehidupan aku masa hadapan dan mengharapkan masa depan gemilangku di atas langit memandu kapal terbang yang orang lain tak tentu leh bawak lagi..hebat.., tapi apa yang pasti sekarang aku bukan pilot aku masih menuntut ilmu di menara gading. Kenapa gagalnye aku jadi pilot, adakah disebabkan mak aku yang tak suka aku jadi pilot sebaliknya suh aku jadi doktor..Atau, perancangan aku tak rapi....???, ditakdirkan Allah, aku ni jadi rabun tak kala aku berumur 11 tahun, pakai spek macam dr. Mahathir pemberian ibuku (seperti gambar di bawah)... Haih..harapan aku mulai pudar di saat itu....



Berbalik ke tajuk kita, masa depan seperti yang kita tahu, unpredictable....Hanya Allah Yang Maha Mengetahui, ketahui apa di depan dan apa yang kite tak tahu...So ape kes nye aku nak cakap pasal masa depan nih....???, sebab terdetik nye persoalan bagaimana cara nak merancang masa depan???...Tak mudah, tak senang, tak juga susah...
dulu zaman sekolah, time upsr, kalo pergi program motivasi, mesti orang suh set matlamat jangka panjang, sederhana, pendek...Tapi cube korang ingatkan balik ape yang korang set dlu, dah capai ke tak???, aha...mungkin ade byk yang miss, dan mungkin dah tercapai dah pun semua semua yang kita impikan dlu...



So kepada rakan rakan yang miss target tu, dont worry be happy, u have TIME to set new target.so camne nak set target, aha, pandai pandailah ek..kengkadang ade orang sediakan back up plan...tapi pendapat aku la, back up plan tu hanya orang yang tak percaya pada diri seniri, orang yang takut untuk hadapi kenyataan, orang yang negatif...sorry to say,tapi ia betul. Nape?, sebab kita seniri yang melaksanakan ape yang ada di depan..tiada siapa yang tahu takdir kite camne, setengah orang kata Tuhan dah tentukan takdir kite semua, tapi ade setengah orang cakap, kite seniri yang tentukan macam mane??so mane satu yang betul...aha...Tuhan dah tentukan takdir kita, tapi kite seniri kene pilih takdir yang macam mane kite nak??...



oklah, nak senang kes aku ni ha, nak jadi pilot tapi tak boleh, masa aku dapat tau yang rabun tak leh jadi pilot jet, jumbo jet,..mak aih kecewa tak terhingga macam dah takde apa yang aku nak kejar kat dunia nih, so, disebabkan aku takde back up plan, aku still belajar dan kenali kehidupan sampai lah aku dapat tau, yang tujuan kita hidup bukan sesuka ati kite untuk lakukan ape ape, yes..kite diberikan kebebasan untuk buat ape ape, tapi tujuan kite beribadah kat Allah...so aku pun sedar, yang tak semestinya aku perlu achieve target aku untuk jadi pilot, so aku berserah kepada Allah, tunjukkan lah kami jalan yang benar...aku mencari apa yang terbaik sambil masih menguburkan impian aku sejak aku kecik, sebab aku sedar, mungkin aku dijadikan untuk sesuatu dan aku cuba lakukan seikhlas-ikhlas yang boleh...dan aku sedar hidup aku semakin baik, ye aku masih menaruh harapan untuk aku bawak kapal terbang, teringin beb, terbang-terbang...haih

Alhamdulillah, walaupun perit, tapi aku sedar yang hidup aku taklah sesusah yang aku pikirkan, aku manage dapat degree in engineering lak tu,result tak meletup tapi still leh buat master, tak bertutur dengan baik tapi masih leh buat orang paham, Allah Maha Kuasa dan Dia lagi Maha Mengetahui, aku bersyukur...dan tetibe aku dapat tahu yang aku still boleh jadi pilot dengan amik lesen khas, available skang nih walaupun kos pun tinggi dan hanya boleh pilotkan focker standard airplane..ok lah kan, yang penting leh terbang kot...Hohohoho, so secara tak sengaja impian aku yang dah lama jadi mayat dalam kubur hidup kembali menjadi zombie,...aku masih boleh capai impian aku tu walaupun susah(kos tinggi)sebab tu aku gelarkan impian zombie..,



So... Masa depan tu perlukan ape senarnye??, perancangan atau harapan??, so jawapannya???? aha...dua dua..perancangan dan harapan...bijak bijak..jom minum susu yang dibeli seniri...

ok...sebelum tamatkan kisah impian zombie nih...aku nak bagi tau skit la yang, Perancangan tu tak semestinya perlukan back up sebab bile korang sediakan back up...korang tak yakin ngan diri korang dan korang senarnye tak yakin korang mampu achieve apa yang korang impikan...so target je satu..., tapi kalo nak byk byk gak atas korang la... yang pentingnya ada Harapan..

\

Mengapa? Kenapa? kerna harapan membuatkan korang percaya Tuhan...selagi korang percayakan Allah, korang mengharapkan bantuanNya,dan tanpa segan silu korang mintak kat dia, berdoa, korang akui kelemahan korang terhadapNya.Isk isk isk,tak pasala pasal boleh jadi soleh dan solehah..beriman... Kepada yang menanya apsal tak dapat dapat lagi nih...eh.. apahal plak dia tak bagi kat korang,hurm mesti bagi tu..tengah calculate korangnye amal jariah semua kot... Dia mesti bagi cuma cepat atau lambat kite tak tahu dan ia bukan keje korang, keje Tuhan tu....Dia Perancang yang sesangat sempurna...nanti bile korang dah nampak semuanya, baru korang sedar, yang korang lakukan sesuatu yang korang tak jangka korang mampu lakukan tapi korang berjaya dan sesangat sesangat eloknye sebab korang berserah dan bertawakal,...jadi time tu jangan lupe bersyukur plak ek....



Ingat...tiada yang impossible dalam dunia nih, Allah kata jadi maka jadi..mintak dan percaya...tiada apa yang mampu menghalangkan kekuasaaNya..Allah Maha Besar...

Letter to Fernando Jose Torres Sanz

An Open Letter to Fernando Jose Torres Sanz





It hardly seems like three and a half years since you were photographed with Rafa Benitez jointly holding aloft a ‘Liverpool FC –You’ll Never Walk Alone’ scarf with the Kop as a backdrop. That day Liverpool supporters all over the world were as proud and as pleased as punch. Kids raced out to get their new shirts with Torres 9 emblazoned on the back, and the older generation such as me looked forward to another in the line of famous LFC goal scorers.

A new love affair had begun.

Three days later we had our first glimpse of you in a Liverpool kit as you replaced fellow debutant Andre Voronin as a 63rd minute substitute in the Friendly in Switzerland against Werder Bremen. The two friendly games played in Switzerland must have confirmed to you the size of the club that you had joined, the stands being full of Liverpool reds from their vast army of fans on the continent.

But surely the scenes that greeted you and your new team-mates when you arrived in Hong Kong International Airport must have had an impression upon you. There were thousands of adoring Asian fans to greet the team, and the scenes were repeated everywhere you went on that short Far East tour. Believe me Fernando, this sort of worldwide appeal is reserved for special clubs. Liverpool, Barcelona and (dare I say) Manchester United.

Chelsea, for all their recent spending power simply do not compare.

The memories from that first season will live long in our hearts as I trust they will in yours.The magical first goal at Anfield when you accepted Stevie’s pass and running half the length of the Main Stand, you cut in, twisted past two Chelsea defenders with a burst of pace and eased the ball into the far corner with expert precision.
The love affair was consummated.

More magical memories are etched in the mind. A couple in a drubbing of Derby, a hat-trick against a Reading team that tried in vain to kick you out of the game, consecutive home trebles against Boro and West Ham, magical solo goals at Derby and Marseille and a fabulous feint against the hapless Geordies.

On top of that there was the wonderful goal in the San Siro, sealing one of the greatest nights in Liverpool’s illustrious history.

And the goals and memories have gone on and on. Old Trafford in 2009, the annihilation of Real Madrid both witnessed the Torres celebration and the familiar smile.

This was a team of great potential , registering wins at Chelsea, the Camp Nou, the Bernabou, Old Trafford. On their day this team could beat anyone.

Yet all the while there was a cancer in the club. A cancer at the very top.

The owners had lied. They had no doubt lied to you, and they had lied to us.

There was to be no investment. There would only be spiralling debts. The chance for making the final step to glory was lost. The moment had passed.

Don’t forget though Fernando that the fans put a lot of effort into removing the culprits. We marched. We stayed behind. But all the while we supported the team. Results became inconsistent but we supported the team. We supported you when you were injured. We supported you when the media started to question you.

The owners have been replaced of course and now FSG are at the helm. I understand that you are frustrated by the speed of progress. However we have previously witnessed false promises and a repeat would have been met with distrust. I firmly believe that John Henry and TomWerner’s approach is the correct one. They are taking time to assess things before making decisions, but they will make the right decisions. Their track record in North American sports tells us this.



We have signed Luis Suarez, a quality player who will light up the Premier league. There is no better keeper than Pepe. Stevie G, Raul and Lucas form a formidable midfield. We will reinforce the squad, using the money that would formerly have been swallowed up by interest payments.

If you see the grass as greener at Chelsea, then make the move. It isn’t though. Not by a long chalk.

You will not get the support at away games that you have become accustomed to. They are not as patient as us. (They booed Drogba, for goodness sake). There is no comparison in the atmosphere at special nights.

At times this season, you have cast a lonely furrow at the top of our attack. Under Hodgson the team was not set up to get the best out of you. We could see that. We understood. We wanted our Torres back. For that reason, above all others, Roy had to go.



Now we have Kenny. Now we finally have our club back. The lads who made ‘The King and The Kid’ flag which has been on the Kop recently did not spend their hard-earned money just because they wanted to be on the television. I’ll bet they did that for their belief in Dalglish and their belief in you. You represent the heartbeat of this club, and that is why we are hurting.



Once again, if you must go then there is nothing we can do, except wish you all the best.

We realise that it is not fair to expect players to share our attachment to the football clubs we support. I am a Liverpool Football club supporter. It occupies an irrationally high proportion of my time and my thoughts. I know it’s probably a bit sad, but that’s the way I am. I will support LFC whoever the owners are. I will support LFC whoever is manager. I will support them wherever our home ground is, whoever the board of directors are, whatever kit we wear, whatever league we are in, and of course, whoever the current players are.

The one constant is the connection between the fan and the club. Everything else is a variable.

The lads who made that flag will be sad this weekend. The kids with Torres posters on their wall will not understand. The older kids with Torres proudly emblazoned on their backs will be sad too. I am bl**dy sad for God’s sake.
But I am also damn proud that I saw your hundred goals for Liverpool Football Club. I thank you sincerely for all the joy you have given me and my fellow Koppites. Thanks too for all the hours you put in on the training ground and in fighting back from injury.

Thanks for that fabulous photo when you had your hands on the World cup but you remembered us and draped a Liverpool scarf around your neck. In a small way we felt part of that moment too.



(craven)

Thanks for all your contribution...we know you want to achieve GREATNESS...but Remember, even when you cannot achieve GREATNESS in your life... the fan who loyal with you will always behind you to make you smile and proud....because, we know you are actually the GREATEST....that is why we in LIVERPOOL FC can live with YOU'LL NEVER WALK ALONE.....because WE BELIEVE

Yes, we actually disappointed you left, and said harsh things to you, but the IMPORTANT THING and the TRUE you need to know is that we are just so in 'love' with you and we will miss you a lot..that's why some of us feel betrayed..because we will always remember how you score the goal, how you celebrate goal with us...


Great memories.... Proud memories.... we will always remember the moment with you

THANKS FERNANDO JOSE TORRES SANZ (EL NINO)

-KOP-