Fall Happenings

I guess I have a seasonal blog now.  I'll try to hit the four seasons to document the happenings around here. My head is spinning and I am not sure where to begin to catch up so I'm sure this post will be quite random and not exactly seamless and polished. The reason my motivation for sitting at the computer has vanished, is that it is now my job. There is no quicker way to ruin an enjoyable hobby than to get paid for it. Don't get me wrong. I'm grateful for the job. I'm not one to tend to think that everything happens for a reason, but this one sure seemed like it was meant to be. It quite literally just fell into my lap. I half heartedly responded to a facebook post of a friend of a friend. The next thing I knew I was back in the saddle of corporate life. It was the first and only interview I have had in 17 years. The job is far from perfect. The commute is long; some days an hour each way. The work is tedious and it took me a couple weeks before I didn't feel like crying when I saw that my kids were home from school and I wasn't there.  But the people are nice, the pay is generous, and it is infinitely better than substitute teaching. My kids are adjusting and my tears dried up pretty quickly when the first paycheck landed in my account. I feel like it is a blessing right now and I am trying to see it as such. I'm thankful to have had the privilege of staying home with my kids when they were tiny, but there is still a tremendous amount of guilt and worry. I realize that the business of raising them is far from over just because they are in school seven hours a day. Plus, selfishly I just miss them. Wes is able to be home most afternoons and Cheryl, Lauren, and Mom and Dad pick up the rest of my slack without complaint. I could not do it without their generosity.

I am also way behind on my blathering. I have great kids. I could not be more proud of who they are becoming. Because of his near perfect score on his 4th grade math assessment last year, they asked if Jake could be tested for the gifted program at his school this year. He passed and is really enjoying the new challenges and more individualized curriculum. I'm like most moms in thinking that my kids are geniuses, but I've always believed that Jake was wise beyond his years. He has never thought like a kid. He was born mature. I thought maybe it was a first born thing and the fact that he is an old soul. I met with both his regular classroom teacher and his "leap" teacher for conferences a couple weeks ago. They made the comment that Jake is very unusual for a "leap" kid because he is so well rounded and doesn't have some of the emotional baggage that so many of these high achieving kids seem to have. He is learning to play the trumpet, is playing football, and was on the Dean's list for getting straight A's. They do a test in PE where they have to do as many sprints as possible while a series of beeps gets faster and faster until they can't make it back in time for the next beep. Jake tied the school record that was set three years ago with 48. Most kids were done at 20. This is turning into a Kim Jong Il type of bragging session, but so be it. I love that kid.

As to not play favorites, Dylan is also getting straight A's and is a rising football star. He stayed behind in the younger league this season of tackle football and he is a force to contend with on the defensive line. He has had several sacks and is in on almost every tackle. He has played a big part in their undefeated season. The boys play for the Special Forces. There is a chant that they yell before and after every game. It's goes something like this..Who are we? Forces. Who are we? FORCES! What are we? Dedicated, motivated, lethal. Except several kids I swear say "meatloaf" instead of lethal.  Awesome.
Sophie decided to join the cheer squad this year. It is great because instead of whining and hanging on me the whole game she has something to do. The other girls are older, but they have been super sweet to her. I worry about the long term viability of her cheer career because like her momma, she can't do the splits, a cartwheel, or certainly not a flip. She does get by with a little half bent leg kick at the end of a cheer and she can memorize cheers like no other. The memorization skill comes in handy in school too. She rocks her poems and book reports. The reading is slow go,  but I don't worry that she will grow into an illiterate adult.

On a sad note, we lost Wes' Grandpa Miller last month. I can't do justice to a man of his caliber in a blog post and it almost seems irreverent to even try. I will say that he was uncommonly generous, consistently kind, and made everyone feel important. Without fail, every single time I saw him, he would make a point to seek me out and tell me in no uncertain terms that I was special. He had so many kids, grandkids, and great grandkids, that I wouldn't have held it against him if he didn't even know my name. He was also a WWII prisoner of war. It is sad to me to realize that we are losing the last of that great generation. I am so thankful that I got chance to know Jay Miller and that my kids knew him.

We took the long way home from Joe City and found some fall leaves.

This was the kids' first real funeral and the first time they have lost someone they knew well. They were sad but handled it better than I thought they would. It is a good teaching opportunity to help them understand why death is sad, but happy at the same time.

I loved this. The Miller Family loves their homemade ice cream. I don't know whose idea it was, but this had to have made Grandpa smile.

Being the first grandchild, Wes and his cousin Jordan were charged with presenting the flag. As hard as this is, it has been theraputic for Wes. He was able to be at his side when he died. It was something that he didn't get to do for and with his Dad. What a great day it had to have been to be reunited with so many that went before him. And to have him be the one to ordain Wes a high priest will always be a priceless memory. I know that Wes has made both his Dad and Grandpa proud.



Grandpa would have been disappointed if we hadn't made time for some fun along the way. I love this picture and how it captures the personalities of my kids. It;s not often that I get genuine smiles in a picture.

Birthdays, Concerts, and 2017

My cute middle child turned nine a couple weeks ago. His birthday falls at a terrible time anyway and I was a little preoccupied. Thankfully, he is a true to form middle child, and required very little for his birthday celebration. His only request was to have a cake and to swim at Grandma Ruth's house. It of course helps that his sweet relatives spoil him rotten on his birthday.

We surprised Dylan with a Diamondbacks game and his very first concert afterwards. My boys love The Refreshments, (now Roger Clyne and the Peacemakers) music. I'm justifiably weary of taking preteen boys to a concert, but I figured it would be family friendly, being at a baseball game on a Saturday. Besides Roger seeming to have a bit of a drinking problem, they kept it upbeat and clean and it was a fun night for all. Brett and Lirio came down to the show as well. It was fun to spend some time with them.

It has been a relatively quiet first couple weeks since Wes became Bishop Whittaker. I noticed on the program this morning that some random phone number is listed on the program next to his name. I admit that I hesistated to point out the error, but in the end decided it was the right thing to do.

As such, I have come to terms with some changes in our family. Some of them awesome and some requiring some patience. In the latter catergory are the following projects that I suspect Wes will have time for in or around 2017, when his Bishop tenure expires. Here is a little photo gallery for your enjoyment.

 The eternally broken lawn mower.

 The outdoor kitchen that holds so much potential.

 The broken plexiglass on the backboard that the HOA forced the removal of.

And the model car Dylan got for his birthday. Don't worry DB will figure it out before 2017. All is well though. I'm really not complaining.

"Bishop Whittaker" Say What?

Life's funny sometimes. If there weren't some twists and turns along the way I suppose it would be boring. I was sitting comfortably in the back row of junior primary, minding my own business having no idea what was about to ambush the Whittaker Family. I won't go into details about the process of finding my husband on the stand in a suit (yes, Wes in a real suit) leading a ward, but I will say that it has been the beginning of a spritual journey that has already blessed our lives. I have no illusions about it being easy and fun all the time. I've had enough close associations with people in heavy leadership roles to know of some of the challenges that come with the title. I do know very clearly that Wes will not be alone in facing this enormous task at hand. We are deeply flawed, anything but stable, and seriously lack the polishing that perhaps a Bishop's family should posess. What I do know, and have always known is that my husband has a good heart and genuinely loves and cares about others. It is a sweet confirmation to know that his Heavenly Father recognizes this also.

We are so blessed to have such amazing and supportive families. The high council room was overflowing with family and friends who drove long distances on short notice to share in the ordination. They quietly contributed in so many ways. We are overwhelmed with gratitude for the little and big acts of kindness along the way. It was not an easy thing for 88 year old Grandpa Miller to get up in the middle of the night and make his way to the valley for our cruel 8 am sacrament meeting time. But to have him be able to ordain his oldest grandson a high priest was priceless. Important life events sting for Wes, even after over 20 years. There are times when you need a hug from your Dad. It was hard to not feel the love from the circle of family there and on the other side.

It was a special day for us. Now the real work begins.

There were some concerns from a few members of Wes' family that this Bishop thing might ruin his sense of humor. So far there is no sign of that. Speaking of humor, receiving this card might be the thing we remember most about the big day. We got a good laugh out of it. People really don't know exactly what to say to you..but his might be the most appropriate.

Both boys were facinated by this strange "suit" thing that Dad was wearing. They couldn't help but try it on.

It was a fun family reunion and maybe someday Karla will fogive me for posting a picture of her. She looks beautiful so I couldn't resist.

And finally, a perk that I was not aware of is that things like this randomly show up at your door. I could get used to this.

Grand Delusions

School starts up again in 19 days, not that I am counting. I really have no idea how it has gone so fast. I had these great plans about honing the kids' math skills,  getting Sophie reading, finishing off the boys' Scout merit badges that we are behind on, getting my house decluttered and organized. We have yet to leave the metro Phoenix area which means if we don't get on the ball, my kids will face the horrible task of writing that dreaded essay about what you did this summer with no trip to talk about.

What have we been doing?

Sadly, Aunt Edris passed away.

Happily, Gabby came to visit.

Brett got very sick. Thankfully he is out of the ICU and getting better everyday.

My van broke - again. I now know how to replace a A/C fan motor, but I hope next time we have the pleasure that it is slightly less than 115 outside.

I started physical therapy on my right shoulder which mysteriously started hurting after baseball season. I stopped going because it is way too time consuming and boring. I can make dinner with the other shoulder.

Wes is actively seeking a new full time employment opportunity. We hope to be able to keep Amazing Athletes as second income. He is making progress with one particular employer that he has some inroads with a couple of friends. I'll leave it at that until we know more. 

The Haws family returned safely from their cross country adventure, What a welcome relief to have Sophie reunited with Lani. You know that famous scene from Uncle Buck where that Culkin kid asks him all the questions. That is how I was feeling during all her waking hours. She may not be reading, but that girl sure thinks, a lot.

Speaking of cute Sophie, she turned six! We did a rerun of last year and threw a little party at Grandma and Grandpa's pool. (If you wondered if we were going to save that six candle, turn it upside down, and put it on Dylan's cake next month, the answer is ubetcha.- one of the many perks of living in Queentucky..nobody is bothered by that.)

We had some fireworks fun with some kind neighbors who invited us over on the 4th. (Sophie was not injured.)

Dylan has spent most of summer vacation being sick. After a nasty bout of the stomach flu, his rattling chest earned him a trip to the doctor (nurse practitioner actually-Does anyone see actual doctors anymore?)  Unfortunately, it was the same day as his divisional swim meet which qualifies the kids for the championship meet which takes place tomorrow. We were awaiting chest x-ray results to rule out pneumonia and/or Valley Fever.  I told Dylan it was up to him if wanted to swim. He decided last minute that his breathing treatment had worked well enough to give it a try. Out of over a hundred kids, he took 10th place in both breaststroke and backstroke. The top 16 advance, so he earned his chance to compete tomorrow. (The chest x-ray was negative for pneumonia.) Jake also placed for freestyle (14th) and backstroke (12th). He missed qualifying for butterfly (17th) by 2/100ths of a second. I suppose we are getting some math lessons in this summer after all. I won't lie, four days per week of swim practice at the crack of dawn will not be missed. Now we have like an hour and a half before football season starts, So much for those "summer packets" that came home on the last day of school.

San Tan Valley All-Stars

I can't hide from the fact that I not so secretly wished that Jake would get passed over for the 9-10 year old All Star Team. We already had swim team going on and enough time had passed that I had almost forgotten about the possibility. He gets offended when I say I was suprised that he made it, because he assumes that I think he is not very good. We like baseball in the spring, but are not a family that lives and breathes baseball year round like many of the little league families. From a purely objective stand point, (if that is possible for a parent) I think baseball is Jake's weakest sport. I don't view this as an insult. Baseball is slow. Jake is not. It sure doesn't hurt to be fast and coordinated, but you don't get the kind of mileage from these attributes in baseball like in other sports we play.

I got the "Congratualtions" email on Friday morning that he had been selected and practice started Friday evening at 4:30. Most days it was around 110 degrees at 4:30. They practiced until the sun went down which is about 3 hours....everyday but Sunday and twice on Saturdays. (I hate to think how long the practices would have been if the field had lights.) This went on for over two weeks until games finally began. Wes got pulled in as an assistant coach (big surprise) so I am not going to pretend to be a martyr that sat out in the sun every evening. But even still, I had my misgivings about the value of this kind of time comittment considering the oppressive heat we live in.



 I have to say with it behind us now though that it was an invaluable character building experience for Jake. I would ask Wes nightly when Jake came home sore, red faced, sweaty and utterly exhausted if they were crossing the line in how hard they were pushing these boys. Beleive it or not, he and I are in agreement on where the line is. If our kids said tomorrow that they didn't want to play sports anymore, we would not force them to. (Frankly, the newfound free time would be a welcome relief.)They drive their desire to compete and excel. You really can't create or force that in a kid. They have that fire in their belly or they don't. Sophie doesn't, which is why dance is perfect for her. My boys thrive on it, so we do our best to nurture it in a healthy positive way. Far beyond the value of hitting homeruns or scoring touchdowns is learning to deal with teammates and coaches with all different personalities and from all walks of life. Learning to lose and more importantly, win graciously, pushing yourself to do hard things, getting back up in the face of defeat are all essential life skills.

With a full year of subbing under my belt, I have observed and interacted with a good sampling kids. There is plenty of blame to spread around from the overuse of technology to absentee parents to economic distress to learning disabliites. The list goes on and on. No knows for sure the root causes of some of the issues our kids have, but my observation is that respect for authority, peers, and self is diminishing. Social skills are lacking, and the percentage of seriously emotionally disturbed kids is alarmingly high. What I saw being instilled in these boys on this All Star team was character and respect for themselves and others.

They were coached by an amazing group of four men (my sweet husband included), who took an interest these 11 boys. They encouraged them and pushed them and made them believe that they were important. They taught them to work together, to fight through adversity, to cheer each other's accomplishments and learn from their mistakes. I couldn't help but wonder what a difference it would make if every kid entering that awkward pre teen stage had someone that believed in them and cared enough to take the time to get involved in their lives, whether it was in sports or otherwise.

 I love this boy.

 Pre-game warm up. He only played about two innings every game, but he ended his season with a great hit which led to one of only two runs scored in their final game.

The 2012 San Tan Valley Little League 9-10 All- Stars won one game and lost two before exiting the double elimination tournament. My proudest moment was when they got lit up against the best team in the tournament with 14 runs in one inning. (I know that sounds sarcastic, but let me finish.) They refused to stay down and came right back with a seven run rally the very next at bat. It wasn't enough to win the game, but it was enough to impress me with the tenacity and confidence of these kids.

Random Summer Observations

Having an 80 degree Memorial Day is heavenly and extremely rare. Don't think for a second that we didn't soak it up. The downside is that opening day for swim team was very chilly for the kids. They pushed through it and toughed it out. Driving 40 minutes everyday to get to 8 AM swim practice four days per week is expensive and annoying, but I don't have homebody kids who are content to sit at home all summer. So I have justified this inconvenience because the alternative is cranking the AC for cranky kids, and playing judge and jury all day for various pointless arguments. So we drive, take full advantage of the free breakfast and lunches being offered at the school and call ourselves fortunate to have something to fill our days. On a side note, Sophie thinks she is luckiest girl in the world because Lucky Charms somehow past the rigorous school nutrition guidelines and made it on to the menu selections for said free breakfasts. I don't ever buy Lucky Charms because my conscience won't let me feed candy to the kids for breakfast, but if it's good enough for Uncle Sam, maybe I need to lighten up.

With all this money saved from the free summer meals, I figure we can afford to indulge in some Frozen Yogurt for a treat...or maybe not. When are these sell by weight fro yo shops going to realize how much kid business they are losing by having a cereal bowl be the smallest size they offer? Of course the kids are going to fill it to the brim with five different flavors and have gummy worms jammed on top. They can't eat that much and it ends up costing more than a kid's meal. The first one who wises up and give parents  a reasonable sized option for kids will get my future business, until then we are sticking with $.79 McDonald's cones. At least I know what I am getting into.

Sophie insists she is going to be a "hair-doer"when she grows up. She begs me to let her do my hair on a daily basis. It's a work in progress for sure and it is definitely not a painless process. She gets terribly offended if don't keep her chosen style for the day which is why I have starting encouraging her to do my hair at night. It's awkward. I just hope she gets good enough to be able to do her own hair soon because she got some challenging hair. She is very proud of her red hair though which makes me happy.

We got new bigger and brighter computer monitors and now my blog face gives me a headache. I'm too lazy to change it, so I apologize.

Is it wrong for me to secretly hope that Jake gets overlooked for the Little League All-Star team? Practice every night when the lows barely get out of the 90s just doesn't sound fun. One sport at a time.

We had so much fun seeing the Hatch family in St. George back on Cinco de Mayo weekend. (I have put off posting about it because of some technical difficulties with the pictures I took.) Mark gave the Ironman race a valiant effort and it was fun to be part of the festivities. He is amazing in the way that he has elevated his fitness to the point of being able to compete in these insane races. We are so blessed with amazing and thoughtful and kind extended family on both sides. Lirio had all the little girls surrounding her the whole trip. They love her and she is so kind, patient, and genuinely interested in each of them. Bruce and Becca have returned in one piece (or four pieces actually) from their Philippine adventure. It was fun to catch up and share a few meals before heading our separate ways. Let me just say that the bar has been set extremely high for the sister in laws in the Hatch family. They are all fabulous in their own right. I anxiously await the return of my actual sister. I won't lie..it has been hard to have her away for a couple months. They are slowly inching closer to the desert, making it all the way to Dallas now. Sophie and I are counting the days!

So Long Kindergarten

I have a love hate relationship with Kindergarten. Back in the boom times when my boys were five and the Arizona government wasn't selling off the Capitol Building to pay their bills, they could offer free all day Kinder. I was reluctant to send my little ones away all day and had some friends who were bent out of shape enough about losing the half day option, that they drove their kids across town to a school that still offered it. (I've noticed that people get worked up about change no matter if it's good change or bad change. There's always some that the knee jerk reaction is going to be negative. I try to take in all the information before rejecting change, because this is a pet peeve of mine.) Anyway, after the first couple teary eyed days, my boys loved all day Kindergarten. Their teacher was fabulous and I admit that selfishly it was awfully nice to have a daily seven hour break from them. Sophie was an adorable  little two year old and she and I partied like it was 1999 everyday. We went to the mall, played at the park, hung out at Peter Piper with our friends, and took afternoon siestas. We were worn out after all.

I did not have a free all day option out here, so it was half day for her, which was a nice transition for me. I am officially done with Kindergarten now. It's crazy how fast it all goes. Sophie has done fantastic and has really thrived this year. She has made some good friends and is starting to read and write. She 's one of those kids that makes me look good even though I really didn't have that much to do with the fact that she is just a smart and more importantly sweet kid.

Every stage of parenting has it's challenges and rewards. I love to cuddle with newborns and cannot get enough of one and two year olds, but both are exhausting. My new phase of having a tweener and school agers is fun in the respect that they are "getting" more of life. I can joke around with them. Their talents and personalities are taking shape and manifesting themselves. The boys have gotten to the point in sports where it is actually competitive and frankly more entertaining to watch. Even their homework is less boring. Wes and I can go out to dinner and not have to call a babysitter. (The house is a wreck and nobody brushes their teeth, but the house is still standing and no one is bleeding when we return.) I try to cherish each phase and not waste time and energy lamenting their progress.

So school is out and we have survived the first day of summer. I invested in a slip and slide. It lasted one day, but for six bucks I really didn't expect much more. The boys are glad to be out. It has seemed like a really fast year for one and a slow one for the other, but both survived unscathed and even pulled of honor roll distinctions. Jake missed getting straight As by two-tenths of a percentage point in math. Dylan did not get a B all year. Jake's propensity for socializing serves as a distraction from academics sometimes, but I wouldn't change it. If school was all about academics, I would home school for a couple hours a day and call it good.

Sophie and awesome Mrs. Little. (Could their be a better name for a Kindergarten teacher?)

Sophie's proud family.

 Did I mention she also had a dance recital. On the way home from the recital I casually said that I should have brought her flowers, since a few of the other moms did. She said, "Oh that's ok, we can go to Fry's right now." So we did. I won't forget again. She takes her dancing very seriously and is pretty good at it. She deserved the flowers.The coordination for sure didn't come from me, but I'm glad she has it.

All smiles.