Sometimes I have to remind myself to "just breathe."  This probably sounds depressing, which it very well could be, but it isn't always sad.

It could be sad when I'm about to explode at my beautiful children and say things I don't really mean but I say to myself, "just breathe," and realize my oldest is only 4. Heck, he's still learning to be a functioning human being on this earth let alone the perfected, calm, settled being I expect him to be.

It could also be sad when it's 5 pm and my house is completely demolished and the kitchen looks like I had Thanksgiving dinner earlier, when in reality I went OUT for breakfast and lunch and have yet to make dinner.  I sometimes have to say to myself, "just breathe," and slowly but surely begin the never-ending process of cleanup before we mess it up again.

Life is full of these "just breathe" moments but it's more full of beautiful "just breathe" moments. In fact, a lot of times this reminder helps create the beautiful moments.

Moments when my 2 kids are wrestle hugging and enjoying each others company and I say, "just breathe," and take this moment in- don't go clean the kitchen.

Or when my husband and I are chatting for hours about our hopes and dreams and we haven't even been interrupted by our kiddlets for a solid hour, but all I can thinking of is the bakery deposits that haven't been done yet- and I say "just breathe," and enjoy this rare moment with your love.

Or when I wake up at 5 am and neither or my kids are next to me in bed and I haven't checked on them since I fell asleep at midnight and I really want to go check if they are both ok, but instead I remind myself, "just breathe" and I quickly drift into a restful couple hours more of sleep until they wake themselves.

I seem to be the type of person to rush to the next step, to make a list, to check off the next task, or complete the next job. Although it has to be a constant reminder, and even then I sometimes don't follow that reminder- I'm grateful for it.  Whether it is to stop me from reacting to a 4 year old tantrum or whether its to remind me to enjoy a beautiful moment in life, I'm grateful.  It reminds me to be true to myself and who I REALLY am. Who I was meant to be. Who I want to become.  To follow my inner compass telling me to enjoy my life. Love my family with every ounce of my being. JUST BREATHE.

Utah weekend

We came to Utah for General Conference and for Andy Olson to do some dental work for me.

Liam played in a canal while I raked some leaves on 2nd east.

We shot some clay pigeons.

Popps shared his vision with Bob about the shire.

Dani and Laur spent some quality time with each other.

As usual, I got a little homesick for the the mountains and the people here in northern Ut.

Piper is ONE

Can't believe my baby is one. This will be short, since it is written in my phone, but boy do we love this sweety. More birthday details coming!

OH man. Every time I give myself a blogging break I regret it. Oh wait, I think I give myself a break after every post! I am officially the worst blogger. It's so overwhelming to start a post after it has been 7 months since the last update. I will just give you a quick overview.

Since my last blog post:

Liam turned 4

Liam started preschool (see pictures below)

Liam dressed as 3 different things for Halloween (I'm missing the 3rd costume, a zombie)

Liam started a fire

Liam extinguished a fire

Liam's hair was long

Liams hair was short

Liam is growing taller

Liam learned to ride a 2 wheel bike at 3 yrs old

Liam loves his sister and that love is sometimes overbearing.

Piper is almost a year

Piper gets cuter by the second

(big smile)

(even bigger smile!)

Piper eats

Piper drinks something besides soy formula

Piper army crawls....

Piper claps

Piper screams

Piper loves reading books

Piper whispers and it just melts my heart

Piper loves playing hide a seek

Piper hates going to sleep at night

Piper says "mama" when she is sad

I'm sure there is so much more. But it's too much pressure. I can't keep thinking about it.

Wil ran a 50 k, and then a week later ran a half marathon. He did great in both. I think that he finished 6th overall in the 50k and 1st in his age? (this is a whole post in itself) He did awesome in his half as well. He got his personal record on a half 1hour 20 minutes or something around that. We are so proud of him.

These next pictures I cry just looking at. Liam LOVEs to watch his dad race. And Wil is always gracious enough to slow down a bit and let Liam finish with him. Liam adores his dad- and he has good reason to.

(watch their stride in these pictures, it is so similar!)

(Liam always tries to beat his dad at the finish!)

50k

Its almost depressing to think what I have done in the past 7 months. WHAT HAVE I DONE?! I have tried to raise 2 kids. (I'm taking a parenting class so this is going much better than it was 7 months ago.) ;) In a talk by Elder Lynn Robbins he says, "A sweet and obedient child will enroll a father or mother only in Parenting 101. If you are blessed with a child who tests your patience to the nth degree, you will be enrolled in Parenting 505. Rather than wonder what you might have done wrong in the pre mortal life to be so deserving, you might consider the more challenging child a blessing and opportunity to become more godlike yourself. With which child will your patience, long-suffering, and other Christlike virtues most likely be tested, developed, and refined? Could it be possible that you need this cild as much as this child needs you?" I know I complain about Liam a lot. He really is a good boy. He can challenge my patience every once in awhile, or everyday. Sometimes I feel like I'm enrolled in Parenting 505 for sure. However, I NEED him- I am convinced even more than he needs me.

I keep thinking about the talk by Jean A Stevens from April conference. In it she says, "These precious children of God come to us with believing hearts. They are full of faith and receptive to feelings of the Spirit. They exemplify humility, obedience, and love. They are often the first to love and the first to fogive." There truly is so much we can learn from our children, and I'm trying to embrace each day knowledge that I get.

Lately I've been getting so troubled by the fact that my children are growing right before my very eyes. Don't get me wrong, I'm so very thankful for the healthy bodies that continue to grow as they should, but I often find myself saying- don't forget this moment: when listening to Liam tell me a "true fake story", or secretly watching Liam and Piper connect in a way only siblings can, or watching Liam try to be in every way like his dad (what he eats, says, does).

Tonight I went to check on Liam as he was trying to fall asleep. He said, "mom, why are you looking at me?" "Because I love you and I don't want to forget what you looked like when you were 4 with big sleepy eyes. You're my little guy" I replied. Then he said, "Mom, its ok. When I'm big you can call me your big guy." The problem with that, I thought, is i don't ever want you to be a big guy. I want you to be small forever. With your gigantic smile, your astounding imagination, your unconstrained expression of love.

But with every passing season I find myself saying and thinking these things, so I can only imagine that they will continue and I will find new things to fall in love with at every age. I just never want to forget my 4 year old Liam and 11 month old Piper.

I heard this song long ago, it is by Mindy Gledhill and I just think it fits my thoughts of this moment in my life perfectly. If you want to listen go here http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r4-PDKNu71I

I'm going to write the lyrics with my pictures.

Little boy, when you speak

I cannot help but kiss your cheeks

I love the way you grab my hands

And tell me all about your plans

Rocket high, comets fly

You and I could take a ride

And fly away to Neverland

And give our best to Peter Pan

When you reach for the stars

don't forget who you are

And please don't turn around and grow up way too fast

(1st day of preschool)

See the sand in my grasp

From the first to the last

Every grain becomes a memory of the past

Oh, life's an hourglass

Life's an hourglass

Story's read, prayer is said

Close your eyes sleepyhead

While angels linger in your dreams

And hold you in their feathered wings

Just like you, I was small

Not that long ago at all

I wish you all the happiness

That God gives freely if you ask

BEST JOB EVER!

Don't get me wrong, I love our bakery. BUT, I'd much rather be doing this.....

Where do I begin?

Once upon a time... i was pregnant.
On Nov. 29th Piper made her arrival. What a sacred experience labor is. I am so grateful I have been lucky enough to experience this twice. I cherish my role as mother. There is nothing more precious in this world to me, than my kids. Here is our newest....

PIPER REES WOOD

It was at love first sight.... for all of us.

Some things took a little getting used to.

While other things came very naturally
You know he has to love her if I find this lying in bed with her.
Life is definitely different...

But oh so good.