This is chapter 15 from the CHANGE JOURNAL », your journal for more clarity, productivity, and mindfulness in everyday life and at work.

Perhaps it’s because evolution made us hunters and gatherers. Maybe we succumb to the seduction of the consumer world and advertising — or both. The fact is, we collect piles of stuff during a lifetime: ballast, clutter, rubbish. And we lug it around with us — whether it helps us or not and whether we like it.

You don’t have to be a messie to realize it has become too much. Many of those useless things distract and even bother us. At the same time, we don’t seem to have a chance to change anything. You probably know the feeling.

All of this applies equally to material as well as emotional ballast. But differentiating the two is significant, as everything linked to the mental/emotional side is too complex for me to explain adequately to you in this context. The material stuff, though, all that junk lying around, can be gotten rid of easily — in a simple, systematic, efficient way by taking small steps.

Let’s start with a number. We own an average of 10,000 things. Bam! Wow. However, the exciting — or better said — logical question is: How many of those do you need?

In search for the answer, a radical approach has made American Dave Bruno famous. One day, he decided he didn’t want to own more than 100 things. He gave himself one year to clear out, sell, or give away his surplus stuff for free. Bruno’s book, “The 100 Thing Challenge,” documents how it worked, how liberating it was, how much time, money, and power he gained from this effort — and how he enjoyed doing without the other 9,900 things permanently.

We admit this is one seriously radical approach. However, Bruno showed that there is plenty to clear out among those 9,900 things we probably don’t need! Consequently, the templates from the CHANGE JOURNAL will help you get rid of something superfluous daily.

Let’s turn this into a little plan. Imagine what it would feel like to dispose of only 2 pounds (= 1 kg) every day. Within less than 18 months, that could amount to more than half a ton of dropped ballast.

On the following page, you will see an overview of the rooms you can systematically clear during your search.

“It is likely that we wouldn’t even miss having several thousand items less around the house.”

In addition, I have designed two individual templates to help you reach the annual target of reducing your ballast by 365 kg:

1. Loosely based on the idea of “The Streak,” dispose of at least 1 kg of unneeded stuff daily. You should try to do this for at least two consecutive months, as by then, it will likely become a new habit automatically!
2. You can also deduct the estimated weight of whatever you’re dumping from your target each time. Just keep throwing out until you’ve reached your goal. If you should manage to do this in bigger steps than one kilo per day, I won’t consider that cheating. ;)

Here are some guidelines for you:

1. Don’t count the usual daily kitchen waste.
2. Do count paper recycling.
3. Clothes you no longer wear also qualify if you dispose of, sell, or comp them. They count whenever they leave your household for good.
4. Whatever lands in flea market boxes only count half. That’s because we think that sorting out should also be rewarded. ;) You qualify for the other half as soon as the contents of the boxes are gone.
5. Simply moving stuff to the basement or other storage rooms does not count. ;)

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We often live by the motto “More means more.” In real life, however, that’s not always the case. Maybe you have heard of the economic theories of “marginal productivity” or “marginal utility” before. Both indicate that in a business context, for example, purchasing yet another machine doesn’t always turn out to be profitable. This also applies to personal situations when people are involved. Trying to accomplish too much, especially to get too many things done simultaneously, can quickly negatively impact the result.

Meanwhile, various scientific studies have established that multitasking is not beneficial. So the slogan should read, “better less and right”. But how do you promote that in a society that strives for “faster, better, and more”?

The answer is — mindfulness! Whatever you may want to do, be present. Focus 100% on one thing at a time, no matter how trivial the activity, like brushing your teeth, answering emails, or even walking. Instead of thinking about the next task, let alone doing two things at once, train your consciousness to stay in the moment — in the here and now.

How can this be achieved? Try practicing mindfulness in every- day life. Mindfulness doesn’t require you to meditate or be a yogi. Pick an activity for the next 7 days and remember to be especially mindful when performing it each day. It could even be an unavoidable activity, such as climbing stairs. For example, consciously ascend each step. Eating is another excellent example: Try chewing each bit one bite at a time, and chew for as long as possible before you swallow. You will realize that even such small changes in your consciousness will lead to higher productivity in other areas of life. You will gain focus — and this will lead to more success.

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Work is piling up on your desk, your partner is asking you for the third time why you haven’t made it to the appointment yet, your crew of friends is sending another funny text message from the bar, and your mother is wondering whether she can come around for a coffee this weekend, the boss hands you his briefing for the night shift — time out!

I see the potential for expressing a polite but definite “no” here and there. But what happens instead? Mock friendly phrases in a voice that is resigned: “Okay!”, “Yeah, sure.”, “But only for your sake, my friend.”, “No problem.”

Why is it so hard to say “no”? Why is that some particular skill that so many seem unable to master?

Simply put, it doesn’t fit the self-image. You want to be helpful, positive, and caring. Somehow a “no” doesn’t fit that picture. You might be afraid to disappoint someone. “No” is negative.

It signals rejection. “No” makes you unpopular. At least, we think so. And that is why many find saying “no” so problematic.

There are also concerns in a tactical-practical context: Maybe I will need this person’s support one day, so it’s better to say yes today — although I don’t feel like helping anyone relocate. Or you can put yourself under pressure and give in: “Hey, I need my car myself, but okay, you can have it.” Or you can use a “yes” at the office to fake a good work climate… instead of saying what you feel: “I have zero time right now, plus you’re such an idiot.”

With this mixture of semi-honest, semi-artificial friendliness, there’s always the danger that the inability to say “no” won’t work to your advantage: Inconsiderate people will always find those who can’t say “no”! It’s not fair, but the inability to say “no” is often shamelessly exploited by folks who would never even think of returning a favor. Your soft side will probably become common knowledge and inspire others to request favors. Disappointment becomes inevitable.

So here’s what you can do: You, too, can say “no”! And it doesn’t have to affect your relationships with other people negatively. On the contrary: A polite and honest “no” is a clear message. Everyone can deal with that. It is better to keep your distance than take part half-heartedly and be annoyed. You would accept it when others say “no” and even expect it, right?

“Saying ‘no’ liberates us and makes us strong.”

Here are 6 tips on saying “no” (without having a guilty conscience):

1. Your own time is valuable. Reread this sentence!
2. You do not have to please everyone. Firstly, it’s impossible, and secondly, it’s exhausting. Rely on your gut feeling to tell you who matters to you — and who doesn’t. The latter ones are ideal candidates for practicing saying “no.”
3. You do not have to justify your answer. As a nice gesture, explain your decision to those important to you.
4. Practice saying “no” at every opportunity you get. You will find it increasingly effortless. Most likely, you will find that even though you said “no” (or perhaps even due to it?), those who are important to you will still appreciate you.
5. Take your time to decide. As a reflex, we tend to provide an immediate answer, although we can’t estimate the consequences. Think it through before you reply.
6. A good boss understands a well-founded “no.” Period.

This doesn’t mean that you should become a hardened naysayer. “No” is merely an option if you want to refuse something. With the templates in the CHANGE JOURNAL, you can track every “no” (and even celebrate it, if you like). You’ll quickly realize how liberating that can be — and how much more time you have for yourself and your priorities!

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The good old sayings from Grandma’s calendar sound dusty and stuffy today, right? Those pearls of wisdom include, “Many a little makes a mickle” or “A penny saved is a penny earned.” But thinking about it, they still have quite a lot of substance. In some way, they contain an efficient, highly up-to-date strategy. The likes of which have produced Tour de France winners and even Olympic champions.

But let’s not get ahead of ourselves.

What may appear like petty-bourgeois modesty at first glance can be just the opposite and even turn out to help achieve the goals that you have set. Whatever those may be! The idea is to establish a somewhat distant goal. Its distance prevents you from reaching it with just a few steps — not even if you expend enormous effort. It could be quite an ambitious goal, perhaps a wish that has long been close to your heart, but at the same time, seemed way out of reach and too tricky to accomplish.

The idea is to move forward with it at a pace that doesn’t require significant effort, taking one step at a time. You may even think every single step isn’t mighty. But that’s not important here; after all, you’re aiming for something bigger — and that’s the key. In this strategy, every little step creates a marginal gain, a minor, secondary success. So each step does its job. You’re now effectively and continuously approaching your far-off goal, although it may have seemed unattainable for so long. And you’re getting there minus the frustration or overexertion. I don’t have to tell you how terrific that feels, right?

Sharing two very different examples, I want to illustrate how there’s more behind this concept than just hard work and patience. What makes it work are cleverness, tactics, and the beautiful effects of synergy.

In example number one, several teams start with something small and worthless, maybe a toothpick. They try to swap this toothpick for something better. So they may get a T-shirt, swap the T-shirt for a CD, the CD for a pot … and in the end, have a bicycle. Finally, all groups meet to compare who has experienced the most significant increase in value. The trick is to refrain from being excessive and not overreach. The biggest success is only possible with small gains.

Nevertheless, we still tend to request the bike immediately, simply because we are impatient and greedy. Out of disappointment over the lack of immediate success and our painfully slow progress, we no longer believe in the greater goal and lose our confidence in attaining it. If we take it step by step, anything is possible!

I find the second example even more fascinating: The British only had marginal success in cycling for decades — until Dave Brailsford took over the national team in 2002. He called his straightforward, albeit groundbreaking, concept the “aggregation of marginal gains.”
The goal was a 1 % improvement across the board. 1 % and no more. Brailsford’s hypothesis: If you improve everything by 1 %, these improvements will add up to an astonishing effect. The result: He created the most successful cycling team of all time.

“The sum of all marginal gains creates an enormous effect.”

How was that possible? In addition to the obvious, like nutrition, training, and technology, Brailsford and his team also included previously neglected areas: Special pillows and mattresses were developed (and used on tour). He also introduced a new way of hand washing to improve hygiene and help prevent illness. As part of this new holistic approach, the team discovered that the concept was a collection of adjustable screws that looked insignificant when viewed individually. But after making the final adjustments, they earned 18 Olympic gold medals and a ton of respect from professional circles worldwide. Then Brailsford continued the successful series with the Sky team — and again, they won four Tour de France titles. By then, Sir Brailsford was knighted by The Queen in 2012 for his merits. So there’s only one question left: What is your Olympic gold medal? Go for it — with marginal gains!

It makes a vast difference whether you improve 1 % per day or whether you get 1 % worse:

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Let’s face it: we read too little. The statistical findings are scary. Want a small example? 18% of men and 11% of women do not read books. Zero books per month, per year, in a lifetime (1). That’s the bitter truth.

And yet, reading gives us unparalleled enrichment: There is hardly a topic yet to be discussed between the two book covers or on a reader’s screen. Whatever the human brain can think of is captured in written form. Nothing is forbidden: crime and love, history and future, fact and fiction, man and woman, android, Nazi, and saint. They all have equal status in books; you can access all their experiences, theories, fantasies, and knowledge at the turn of a page.

Isn’t that fantastic?

You are in good company as a reader: Avid readers include Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg, tennis star Andrea Petkovic, and the late fashion pope Karl Lagerfeld. Other reading buffs are the late Motörhead legend Lemmy Kilmister (who did it almost as often as drinking whiskey-cola), Bill Gates, and many other wealthiest people in the world who do it — the list of famous bookworms is long. We all know that most celebrities live lives on tight schedules. So where do they find the time to read?

The answer is simple: They do it because it matters to them. They are curious; they want to sweep off into unknown worlds. They want to relive their childhood memories. They love to let their imagination be their guide. They want to be inspired and enjoy learning new things. That’s why they reserve several hours each week to do so. It’s a pleasure, not a sacrifice!

By the way, there are many good, sound reasons for reading. Here are my top six:

1. You open yourself to new things and benefit from the experience of others.
2. You can escape the annoying outside world.
3. You improve your perception, creativity, and vocabulary.
4. You boost your focus, concentration, and strength of memory.
5. You are more relaxed after no more than 6 minutes of reading. (2)
6. You become a more competent and attractive dialog partner.

Let’s come back to the topic of time: For a book of, say, 300 pages, you may need to spend a total of eight hours reading. Statistically, you spend an average of two hours on social media and messengers daily! Let’s do the math: If it were possible to exchange a few minutes of online time for a few minutes to read a book every day, you would achieve a significant effect: Reading for one hour per day will result in about one book per week.

“We could easily read a book each week. If only we were less distracted by digital content.”

But make sure you only take on only a little at a time. Just get started, and then finding your own pace will come naturally. You will also discover which books turn you on and which don’t. Read only books that you like! Then you will look forward to reading, not seeing it as an annoying task you must check off the to-do list. Besides, there are far too many beautiful books to read!

The calendar templates in the CHANGE JOURNAL are based on a study by Mindlab International, which found that reading reduces stress. Participants were asked to read in silence for 6 minutes. The cardiac frequency slowed down, and their muscles relaxed. With the templates, you can track how much you read daily. And you can rate your more regular reading experience as joyful or unpleasant.

Yes, that’s right, it’s all about books here. Even though Twitter, Facebook, emails, blogs & co. also offer reading materials you can learn from, these — specifically digital publications — are predominantly transitory. And I wouldn’t count any materials you need to read for your job or studies. You will be able to feel the difference if you take the extra time to engage in a book and fully immerse yourself in a completely different world of thought.

In the template — or your journal — you can start by writing down all the books you have ever wanted to read so that you will not run out of ideas. ;)

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(1) Forsa-Institute 2015 on behalf of the German magazine “Stern”

(2) According to a study by Mindlab International (University of Sussex), reading reduces stress verifiably and quickly.

Everyone likes to receive compliments, but they should be pleasing and truthful. Nobody wants praise that is trite or superficial. It is proven that many people view a compliment as more than a nicely expressed thought. Recipients of a compliment internalize those kind words; their self-esteem increases, and they gain confidence. Even those who make a compliment feel good when as a result, they have managed to make someone smile. Isn’t that what the term “win-win situation” was invented for?

And although we know that even though everyone benefits from positive interaction, we are all rather stingy with compliments. Especially Germans are not exactly known for their flattery. Why is that? Is it because people don’t want to be labeled bootlickers? Or softies? Maybe people need more practice in making compliments!

“If we all enjoy receiving compliments so much, why aren’t we more generous in giving them?”

Whatever the catch may be, here are six tips on how to make a well-received compliment:

1. Show personal interest
   If you want to say something nice about somebody, then you can, of course, praise their outfit or their winning smile. But something a little more meaningful will have a better effect. Interests and personal attributes are ideally suited for a good compliment.
2. Language and ambiance
   The “what” is essential, but so are the “how” and the “where”. A winning compliment requires linguistic originality expressed in the correct location. You can practice that and develop a sense of timing. For example, suppose you’re at a loud, bustling bar where you can’t be heard, and your voice always fails you when you’re excited. In that case, you should find a quiet moment to express your kind words on the balcony or while walking.
3. Keep the balance
   Less is more, so don’t exaggerate! Never suffocate the object of your affection with too many well-intentioned words because that will have the opposite effect. This rule also applies to the frequency of giving a compliment. While slightly overdoing it might be sweet, the mood can quickly sour.
4. Be explicit
   Ambiguity kills every compliment, and irony is just as inappropriate. This only creates misunderstanding and annoyance.
5. Suitable topics
   We want a partner who shares our interests. Therefore, friendly remarks about possible similarities are good. That in itself makes listening attentively a worthwhile cause. A comment such as, “I think it’s wonderful that we have so much in common” is fine and dandy. However, “Great! Then we can go to the Dada exhibition together.” creates a much better connection.
6. Good behavior
   Perfect courtesy is a compliment in itself. The main ingredients for a good compliment: a smile, attentiveness, empathy, and courteous treatment. And sincerity.

Sure, everything sounds logical, but how can you apply it? You can track how many compliments you have made in the templates that come with the CHANGE JOURNAL ». This is already good feedback for yourself and indicates whether you are stingy or generous with compliments. Based on two examples, you can subsequently optimize your compliment-giving skills. The more you practice, the more adept you’ll be.

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“Hello, my name is … and … um…” How many memorable pitches have you experienced over the past few months — or even your whole life? Why are some more inspiring than others? And what about your own pitches?

Sometimes we have to introduce ourselves to someone somewhere several times a day. Why is it so difficult for most of us to make a lasting and compelling impression? And why do we think we need to reinvent our own story from scratch every time? Specific aspects need to be put in a different order or emphasized somewhat differently; that depends on who we pitch to and our audience in each case. It also clearly depends on what we want to achieve with our pitch. And naturally, not every brief self-introduction should be repeated word for word at every new event.

In addition, there is a conflict between our desire to present ourselves self-confidently and the fact that we don’t want to come across as a babbling braggart. Depending on the context, individual personality, and cultural background, most people feel more comfortable presenting audiences with a more reserved version of themselves: kinder, charming, and modest. Nevertheless, I suspect it rarely hurts to lay it on a little bit thicker — and consequently make a more profound and lasting impression. Modesty is too often misinterpreted as mediocrity — and who wants to be remembered as dull? Don’t get me wrong: I wouldn’t encourage anyone to lie! I intend to have you evaluate how you usually introduce yourself and how you could formulate it differently to spice up your image in the future.

As I said, it’s often purely a matter of context. This is defined by the following key questions: Who are you addressing? What intention does this presentation have? How important is it to leave a positive and lasting impression? And what should people remember first when they think of you later? Are you preparing for a job interview? Are you introducing yourself at a networking event? Or are you just trying to improve your presentation strategy outside the intimate circle of family and friends?

“The more natural and concise the pitch, the more time invested in preparing it.”

Either way, here are a few things that you might want to bear in mind:

Whenever you’re at a private party, presenting yourself more modestly than at a networking event is undoubtedly more appropriate. Be aware that you do not have to carefully assemble a few choice sentences to win over anybody as a new customer or your own fan club president. Being liked is not achieved by systematically intimidating your dialogue partner. And you wouldn’t want to scare away that new acquaintance due to a severe case of boasting either, right?

Try to imagine a first conversation as a game of ping-pong: Start with simple, brief sentences to which your counterpart can respond effortlessly. It is sometimes helpful to use familiar keywords for the person you are speaking with so that they can pick up on them to provide effortless replies. It could be about the event that you are both currently attending. To begin the conversation, it is usually easiest to rely on some questions that are easy to answer. A brief personal introduction might make sense in a private circle, supplemented with information on who invited you or why you are participating in the event. Ask a simple question about why your counterpart decided to attend the event or how/if they know the host personally.

In a more professional context, it might be wise to speak of the expectations that you associate with your event participation (workshop, conference, etc.). This makes it easy to initiate a casual dialogue, which requires significant effort from any participants. It is often an innocent subject to ask someone what they hope to gain from such an event. Not infrequently, the answer already contains references to the person’s professional field or their specific job. It’s also good to drop some helpful keywords here and there to help generate a more extended conversation and trigger questions from the other party. Depending on the type of event and your own goals, it is often beneficial to have prepared some “modules” that you would like to discuss.

Here are the basics:

Please compile all relevant information about yourself in the following templates. It isn’t as trivial as it sounds! These pieces of information are initial components that you can build on later. Next, fill out the “Awesomeness list” with your personal strengths. This is where you compile all skills and abilities you think you can master. Then critically review that list with someone who knows you well. This will make your list somewhat leaner. Ultimately, the list should only include those things that you consider your true strengths — the ones that can be used in a brief self-presentation or a pitch.

Now that we’ve discussed the basics, we can make it more interesting:

1. Look at the questions in the templates on the following pages.

2. Adjust your presentation accordingly if you already know a few things about your conversation partner.

3. Try to see things from their perspective, and search for topics or catchwords that might make you more attractive or valuable from your counterpart’s point of view.

With these templates in mind, you will have a selection of modules to tailor to any specific occasion or professional purpose!

And here’s one final piece of advice: Once you’ve prepared your little self-presentation and theme modules, pitch them to yourself until it no longer feels artificial but fluent and natural. This will help you to believe in it yourself … which is a determining factor if you want to convince others later. ;)

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If you’re reading this, you’ve probably started exploring personal finance. You might have procrastinated over it for a while and now want to get a grip on it. I’ve been avoiding it for a time because I was overwhelmed by the apparent complexity of it. Until I realized how important and simple it is to own my personal finance. Until I realized that I wasted the opportunity of financial independence and early retirement just because I did not understand how important — and easy — it is to own my finance. Damn it. It’s not too late yet, but I will definitely not achieve what I could have achieved starting 10 years earlier.

I’m writing this blog now, so you can get it right faster than I did.

Why should I care? You want to live well without working for it. When you retire (late or early) or want financial independence, choose where, how much, and what to do for a living.

How it works: You build up an investment portfolio to a point where you can live from the returns, just like feeding a goose, so it will give you bigger and bigger eggs with time.*

What you need to do: You develop an investment strategy and own it.

1. Set your goals
2. Get transparency over your current financial situation
3. Develop your personal strategy
4. Set up your portfolio and savings plan
5. Continuously optimize your income and spending
6. Regularly inspect and adapt (if necessary) your investment portfolio

In this blog, I’ll not go into the details of the steps; I will do that later. I share the principles I follow to make my financial decisions in general. The principles here help me — and maybe you, too — in everyday decision-making. Please help to improve them by sharing your feedback!

9 Personal Finance Principles

1/ Know your goals

Your financial strategy and decisions will depend on your personal goals and needs. Know them, and you’ll be able to pick the right strategy for you.

2/ Own your strategy and decisions

Do not let anyone else make decisions that are essential to your life. Everyone has their own interest, which probably does not align with yours. They will make decisions that are good for them and might be bad for you. The same is true for any financial institution that is usually more interested in making money off you than for you.

3/ Know your investment assets

Also, when you know how your investments work, you’ll not have the nagging feeling that you’re not set up well. You’ll sleep better, even during a crisis.

4/ Consumption is not an investment

An investment is an asset whose value increases over time. Unlike a new car that massively loses value when you drive it off the dealer’s yard, education or assets like ETFs — if chosen well — increase their value over time. Taking a loan for a good investment is ok, but not for Consumption.

5/ Plan for the long run

“Compound interest!” was Albert Einstein’s answer when asked about the most potent force in the universe. It grows exponentially, meaning it grows slowly at the beginning and then takes off like a rocket. Take full advantage of it whenever you can.

6/ Diversify your investments

Putting all eggs in the same basket is risky; it might fall, and all of them are lost. So make sure you spread your investments over several asset classes (fonds, bonds, real estate, etc.) to minimize the risk of losing all if one of them fails.

7/ De-risk over time

The world might be in an economic crisis when you depend on living on your profits. At that moment, you want your investments to be as safe as possible. So balance your investment portfolio to become less and less risky over time. The quality of life for the rest of your life might depend on it.

8/ Don’t spend more than you own

Simple math: you’ll only grow assets if you earn more than you spend. And a loan is a debt, not an asset suitable for consumption.

9/ Avoid Lifestyle Creep
Don’t start spending more when you earn more. Just use the surplus income to invest to achieve your personal goals faster.

*Thanks to Madame Moneypenny for the analogy!

As soon as kids learn to speak, they ask questions like “Why is the sky blue?” or “How do they get the stripes into the toothpaste?” etc. Asking questions is not just limited to a child’s boundless curiosity.

Those who self-reflect and seek to improve the accuracy of their worldview can’t help but ask questions such as, “Who am I?” or, “Where did we come from, and where are we going?”. Besides, you will be searching forever if you don’t ask questions. Coming up with intelligent questions is easier said than done. What is it that I want to know? What would be an intelligent question to ask? And what kind of answer could be helpful? Oh my!
This is getting complicated. How will I manage? Easy, tiger! You’re in good hands here. This journal will take you further while keeping things simple. I promise. Some countless books and concepts try to explain things in detail. That’s okay if you intend to go to therapy afterward.

It is obviously totally unsuitable within a delightful setting such as this one. This still doesn’t mean you will have to do without any guidelines!
I have compiled inspiring exercises and lists, most of which are self-explanatory. They will help you better understand yourself: Where you are right now and where you may still want to go. What you want to do with the rest of your life — more or less. Or what excuses you might be carrying around with you — and how to shake them. Then there’s a list of all those things that are stressing you out right now. You may even discover that most of these tormentors rarely have long-term relevance.

My templates allow you to initiate change processes. I’m assuming you’re ready to undertake this little adventure because otherwise, you wouldn’t waste time reading these lines. And since it sometimes takes a while to set such a process in motion, you might want to check out our motivation hack.

The only important thing now is to be totally honest with yourself. That shouldn’t be a problem: This is your private journal, not your blog.

Have fun getting to know the most exciting person in the universe! That’s who you are in your life … just like everyone else is in their own lives!

Get more productivity and life hacks plus templates for journaling from the CHANGE JOURNAL »

“Humans are creatures of habit.” This phrase is probably almost as old as humanity itself. No wonder habits tend to sneak into our lives unnoticed — to let us get through most of the day in autopilot mode. According to scientific research, this goes for 40 % of our waking hours. And actually, that’s just fine. Can you imagine how exhausting it would be if we had to rethink every move and action first? Habits make life easier for us.

That means everything’s okay. Well, no! Unfortunately, not all habits are good friends. The bag of gummy bears on the desk, the sluggishness that keeps you permanently glued to your couch, the mobile phone game that keeps you away from a book — all those treacherous, nasty temptations. Let’s talk about bad habits … and how to get rid of them.

It’s far from easy to shake off something you’ve gotten used to. Especially something that has become self-perpetuating and takes place automatically. But I want to touch this hot iron with a clear plan: A simple strategy based on scientific facts, empirical data, and an inspiring journal template. This combination should be worthy of you giving it a chance.

I want to start with the number 66. That’s a doubly exciting number from more than just one perspective, as it takes an average of 66 days to acquire a pattern of behavior. And it also takes 66 days to get rid of it. Behavioral scientist Phillippa Lally came to this conclusion in one of her 2009 studies. Let’s focus on eliminating behavior. The New York Times journalist Charles Duhigg presented a convincing account of his experience. His opponent was a chocolate cookie: Every day at 3.30 pm, he went to the cafeteria and ate one — and when he realized that it was like an addiction, it was too late. Upon realizing that he was un- able to forget about the infamous cookie ritual, he examined the problem in depth. He discovered what he calls the “habit loop”: The behavioral pattern on which every habit, good or bad, is based. This habit loop consists of three phases:

1. The trigger tells the brain to adopt a particular behavior… such as having to eat a chocolate cookie every day at 3.30 pm.
2. The routine that goes along with this loop: Leaving the desk on time, walking to the cafeteria, buying a cookie, and chatting with colleagues while eating the cookie.
3. The reward — is the positive enjoyment experienced by the brain, which will make it recall the habit loop the next time.

It’s a tricky situation: We’re trapped before we fully realize that our chocolate cookie (or anything else) has become more than an extra we occasionally enjoy. We frequently do not yet understand that this behavior has already morphed into an automatic habit. Whenever we don’t receive little pleasure, we feel — at least! — an unpleasant deficit. That’s why we find it so hard to eliminate our routine.

But we know that pursuing a clear strategy to support our good intention can help us survive those 66 days. And at the end of this valley of tears, the unwanted habit will be overcome once and for all.

Doesn’t this prospect give you the courage to try it too?

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