My last retail “day job” was managing a record store in suburban Chicago. This would have been late 1994 or early 1995, before I got the job at TSR in September ’95. I had outgrown that job by then—and I mean really outgrown it—and most of that last stint in music retail was entirely forgettable. But this one customer has never left my consciousness, and that’s because I made a mental effort to fix her there.
One weekday morning when the store was typically really dead an older woman wandered in. I guessed her to be maybe in her seventies, and I could immediately tell she was a fish out of water. Of course I approached her to ask if she needed any help and, relieved, she said she’d just bought a new car and wanted to “get some music for it.” She quickly added that she liked “the old timey stuff, like Tony Bennett.” Not at all surprised, I happily walked her over to the Easy Listening section and, it being 1994-5 asked the obligatory question: “Do you want CDs or cassettes?”
The look that descended over her face almost made me gasp out loud. It was as if I’d asked her to compare Einstein’s General Theory of Relativity to his Special Theory of Relativity, citing sources no older than three years, and only from peer-reviewed journals.
Her answer: “Its a Cadillac.”
Okay, now, again, this was 1994(ish) so at that point I still needed a specific answer. Not wanting to prolong the confusion I asked if she had the car with her and she did, so we walked outside and I looked at the dash and found a cassette player. Mystery solved, we walked back in and she happily picked out a few groovy easy listening tapes and went on her way smiling.
God only knows if she figured out how to play them.
But that interaction left a deep impression on me. In that moment, right after she left the store, I told myself:
Never be that lady.
And not because she was a bad person—she was super nice, actually—but because, at least I felt then as a young and vibrant thirty-year-old, that she had chosen to be left behind. She didn’t have to be some kind—any kind—of audiophile or tech first adopter, but I felt as though she should at least have had a general working knowledge of the world around her. CDs and cassettes were not today’s disruptive new technology. They had both been in operation for a long time. I really felt she should have known at least which format her fancy new car required.
So I made the promise to myself that no matter how long I lived, and no matter how the technological landscape changed around me, I would at the very least know the difference between a CD and a cassette.
And you know what? I’ve kept that moment in mind lo these thirty and more years, and indeed I have not been left behind. You’re reading me on the internet right now. I’ve rolled along with social media, streaming television, upgrading computers and phones along the way. I know what an app is. I know I have an iPhone and how that’s different from an Android phone. I’m not on TikTok or Instagram but I know what they are. I know the difference between Google and DuckDuckGo and have chosen the latter. Though I don’t use every single new thing, I live in the present moment.
And then we get to AI.
Because that new technology attacked me directly by going after writing and editing, by going after artists, my shields went up and I will have none of it. And now, because of that, every instance of those two initials makes my skin crawl and I’m ready to defend myself. The fact that my son graduated with a degree in computer science and works in a super market because the once massively job-rich Seattle area tech scene has been laying people off since the end of the pandemic, which coincided with his graduation… well, that doesn’t help. My daughter is currently unemployed because her career looks to be on the AI chopping block, too.
I understand what things like ChatGPT and Copilot are and what they tell us they’re supposed to do, and how it’s a good thing, but being aware of the technology means I’m also aware of the death toll ChatGPT is now dragging behind it. I’m seeing Amazon flooded with AI generated “books” that are doing enormous damage to the already unfairly negative reputation of indie publishing. And I’m also keenly aware of the abusive relationship I’m now trapped in with Amazon. How do I sell my books without them, even if neither of those books are actually selling very many copies? I’ve gotten used to just clicking on the app and things I need appear in a day or two like magic… though very few of the things I order arrive in good condition or are made with the tiniest eye on quality, so…
And then, because of the obvious and undisguised evil of Jeff Bezos, am I supposed to get a full list of Amazon Web Services’ clients then boycott them too? That would be—trust me—a lot of companies big and small. I just said I’ve been keeping up with technology, and in fact my livelihood now depends on being online. I can’t just find a cabin somewhere and live off the land.
I don’t know what to do… and I can feel myself fading into depression even as I write this.
I don’t think I’m the old lady with the Cadillac when it comes to AI. It’s attacking human creativity, it’s stealing intellectual property, and it’s pushing skilled white collar workers out of the workforce literally tens of thousands at a go. And it is infected with racism, conspiracy stories, pseudoscience, propaganda…
But then we still keep hearing things like, “Oh, no, there might be growing pains, but this is a miracle. It will take away all the little tasks that keep you from…”
Doing what?
Making art that AI has completely devalued?
Working at my non-existent job?
I know the difference between a CD and cassette, and I know the difference between a figurative killer app and a literal killer app.
Or am I just an old fart who’s been left behind by a world that not only doesn’t give a shit about old farts—and that’s been true of America for at least fifty years—but doesn’t give a shit about anybody.
I don’t know, man, point me to the punk rock section of Spotify and leave me there to cry while I try to get it to play “California Über Alles” in my Ford Fiesta.
Does that have Spotify?
—Philip Athans
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Absolutely not one word of this post was in any way generated by any version of an “AI” or Large Language Model, and no permission is granted for the use of any of the contents of this blog in the training of AI, LLM, or other generative systems.
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