I am 17, I’m at a friends party and I’m drunk. Stumbling around the dimly lit rooms I am trying to find a face I recognise. The deep throbbing of the music is making me feel sick and the sight of semi naked couples dry humping on sofas is making me want to pull my own eye balls out. It’s not that I am a prude. No one wants to dry hump me. Can you get an STI from dry humping? The walls are shaking and there are glow sticks illuminating the walls.

God, I need to find Bell before I pass out. Last time I saw her she had locked herself in a toilet with the most disgusting boy I have ever seen. Holding onto the walls I drag myself into the garage of her house. Here people have opened cans of paint and have thrown them all over the walls and each other. I get a mouthful as I walk towards some chairs to have a break from the spinning walls. This party sucks, I haven’t found anyone to pull, no one has even spoken to me and I feel sick. This is how every party goes. I am 17 and I haven’t even had a kiss yet. I don’t think I would even know how to do it if I had the chance. Being sent to an all girls, boarding school hasn’t help my situation. Selfish parents! I am in my prime and wilting like a flower.

I slump next to some emo looking kid who clearly isn’t enjoying himself. His white shirt and black jeans don’t have a blob of paint on them. He is casually swigging a beer, his fringe covering half his face and his nails are painted black.

‘You look like you need some air babe’. I think he’s talking to me, looking around there isn’t anyone else. Yep, he’s talking to me. Holding off being sick and straining my eyes to look at him, I nod. We both get up and he walks me outside. He mutters about living next door and gate crashing.

Walking down the street away from the party I find out his name is Trace, he skateboards and he is in a band. Immediately, I don’t care he’s an emo. He is the coolest dude ever! Not what daddy would recommend. Perfect!

‘Do you have a boyfriend?’ He casually asks, making a face like Popeye to drink his beer in what I assume is supposed to be cool.

‘No, I’m not into that kind of thing. Free spirit, seeing where life takes me. Boyfriend’s tie you down..man’ I add for effect. Dumbing down my plummy private school accent. We stop at a skatepark, like those typical kids you see sat in parks, we sit in the dark, on top of a ramp drinking our beers in silence. I had never been a typical kid before, I felt rebellious. I wanted to write my initials into the ramp and swear at anyone that walks past.

‘Do you want to have sex here?’ He has no embarrassment at asking, again casually, as though he didn’t care either way. Looking at him he wasn’t marriage material, but then again I wasn’t planning on being a virgin when I get married. How will you know if it’s any good?

‘Nah, ta’ Shit, I am sweating. What if I get raped? I mean you hear about it don’t you?! Why did I leave the party on my own, stupid piss head. They will probably find my body, with my boobs cut off or something.

He is leaning forwards.

‘I gives you a kiss instead’ I say breathless.

And that was how I had my first kiss. It wasn’t cute and it wasn’t particularly spectacular. To be fair to Trace he took my number and went on a date to the cinema. He didn’t call. But looking back not surprising, I took two friends with me, ate all his popcorn and made him watch Shrek.