A little over a year ago, I was presented with an opportunity in my professional career that I wasn’t expecting. When it was brought to my attention, I’ll be honest…it really caught me off guard and was the last thing I was expecting at that time. What surprised me even more after learning about the new role, the new salary, and the new title, was my response.
I declined the offer.
I never second guessed my decision. To this day, I still haven’t. Then today, the person who is currently in that very role said something to me that further cemented the fact that I was absolutely right to make the decision I did. What I realized last year when I pondered the offer was that it was my decades of experience that culminated in me saying no. I didn’t do it to hurt anyone’s feelings but rather to validate my own.
Too many times, we make decisions that feel a bit unsteady. Our gut typically tells us which way to go. It’s when we ignore that gut feeling, when we fool ourselves into believing we should feel grateful for the offer or obligated to accept it despite that nagging feeling, that we end up in an internal conflict that makes us feel uneasy or stressed.
Sure, there are times that we second guess ourselves because we don’t think we’re qualified for a position, so accepting it is scary. That wasn’t the case for me. I absolutely knew I was very qualified for the position. I had zero doubt. In fact, had I known ahead of time that the position was opening, I would have been SHOCKED had they not come to me first. I’m not saying this to be conceited, but rather because it was just a good fit. The thing was, though, that I had basically had that job before, at many other companies, and I knew exactly what it would have been like. Moreover, I knew I didn’t want that for myself. Not again. I’ve learned a lot in my career, but the most important thing I’ve learned is when and how to say no.
Today, as my colleague walked away, I smiled to myself because I realized that despite how hectic things can get in my current role, I’m happy. My boss is an amazing person to work for and with and makes me laugh daily. My team, which includes over 60 people, is like family despite the fact that almost all of them live and work remotely. They tell me quite often how much they appreciate me, and, in return, I take immense pleasure in making their lives easier.
What’s even more comforting to me is that I feel respected at my company and am incredibly grateful that others know they can come to me for help, and often do. For so long, I just felt stuck in my career and that I was going nowhere. I finally came to realize that my career is what I make of it. There are all sorts of opportunities out there, even while staying where I am, to become better and find out ways to build on my skills. Remember though, I am feeling this way despite saying no when opportunity knocked. To many people, no may be seen as a negative word, but, for me, it’s leading me down a positive path, and I can’t wait to see where it goes!
Classified Confessions 
