Learning: Count 203 & 204

I always wonder if the little things actually mean anything in the mist of a tragic or hard situation, but now I know they absolutely do. 

You can't see it, but I get really emotional and teary eyed when I think or talk about even just the cards people sent me in the mail.

Also, apparently I am the last to figure it out . . . pretty much everyone uses disposable "dishes" when they bring meals in.  Good to know, because it was so much easier to only have to return a few dishes here and there.

Christmas Cards 2011

In case we missed you, but really, if you watch the blog . . . you've already heard it all.

(Can you believe I got cards out?!  It was a small feat, I'm sooo proud of for this year.  We missed last year, and I couldn't skip 2 years in a row!)

2011

So, it’s a full on letter this year since Ashleigh has the “down time” (see below) to get one all hammered out (but still couldn’t get the cards out on time).

Addison (8) was baptized a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter- Day Saints this year. She (after lots and lots of work) perfected her back handspring, started dance, started 3rd grade, continues to fuel (with the help of her Mom) her love for Harry Potter, reads like a fiend and loves to create. We'll say it a million times and it will never do it justice . . . Addie is just a good, good kid that we would be lost without. Our neighbor really asked what it was like running a family with 3 responsible adults . . . not far off.

Olivia (5) started kindergarten this year and the house is actually quiet for 3 hours a day. She also started dance, gymnastics and loves the new challenge of reading. She is still our "energetic" child and there’s always something with her . . . like the hand mixer stuck in her hair, her ultra sensory skills for clothing seams, and running into everything (that’s how we know she’s really Ashleigh’s daughter). Our home might be pretty dull without our Ollie Dollie to liven things up.

Drew (2) is finally talking like no one's business and sometimes we miss the old days with our little "mute boy." Unfortunately, he's 2 and he's experimenting with boundaries - every day, all day. He's potty trained, he's an expert at being a dog for his beloved sisters, he loves to leave long phone messages for "my daddy,” he finally got over an “always naked” phase, and though he definitely has some special skills with balls, he also loves his Rapunzel Barbie Olivia finally just gave him.

Ashleigh has been eternally busy until a pretty terrible car accident that recently put her on a mandatory "vacation" for 4-5 months (broken pelvis, back, ribs, and a collapsed lung). Thankfully, with time, she will make a full recovery. In the "old days" she stayed busy with too much work, lots of church, food storage, not enough quilting and crafts and then the obvious class parties, carpools, kids, kids, kids . . . And loved every (fun, difficult, proud, frustrating) minute and can't wait to be back in the throes of motherhood and life again.

Ansen loves his new job at Miche Bag - a company that makes interchangeable purses. He's become quite the purse enthusiast, but for the record he does the accounting, not the designing. He still plays golf, has successfully trained his 2 girls to be Yankees fans who really know how talk the talk and walk the walk (there are some strong friends and foes in our neighborhood), and is currently filling the vacant position of "Mom" and full time care taker to Ashleigh.

Christmas 2011

On Friday night we all headed over to Banna and Branda's house.  Ryan, Kendall and Halle had been at our house helping so it was a mass movement.  It always is a big production getting Christmas over to my parents' house, but this year was the absolute worst. 

5 cars later . . . yes 5 (and my mom had taken most all the Christmas present already) we made it.  We needed the whole Suburban to take all my equipment, we needed my mom's car for me (perfect height) and the kids, Ansen's car full of stuff, my Dad's car for Ryan and Kendall and stuff and another load with Ansen's car.  It felt like a ridiculous parade pulling out of here Friday night. 

It was the second time I left the house in 5 weeks and it was exciting.

On Christmas Eve, Liv made forts with Halle and Drew.  She's the queen of forts lately and my walker has been perfect.

We had Fondue dinner and acted out the Nativity.  I'm thinking that we need more kids for acting and more adults for audience members.  Drew wouldn't participate until he saw Addison standing on the ladder as the Angel . . . so he's just a useless extra this year.  And Olivia insisted that Ansen was Joseph (we missed Jeff).

We decorated sugar cookies and went to bed at a reasonable hour (not like last year).

Christmas morning looked a little more like Glamor Shots this year since my mom put the girls' hair in curlers for church . . .

Santa brought razors (we were in desperate need of some new ones around here!) and Lala Loopsie dolls for both girls. 

They really did want the same thing and it just made it so much easier for Santa this year since he was a little laid up anyway.

And little Drewy got a garbage truck . . . though he kept his eye on those Lala Loopsie dolls all day.  Here's Ansen tyring to convince Drew that the garbage truck really is cool.

And Halle got a stroller to walk around with.

Ansen and I called it a "draw" this year.  It was a "hectic" shopping season this year and since we bought me an iPad and Ansen got some new, amazing golf clubs we figured we were happy enough for one month.   Of course Ansen still got me a few things because he always cheats like that.

And this poor little thing won't have to worry about what if it's raining when she comes out of Kindergarten anymore (yeah, it's been stressful) . . . I love that it's the little things. 

And our little guy got the flu . . . it was so sad. 

We missed that sweet Christmas through the eyes of a 2 year old - it's one of the best ones!

But later, when he was feeling better, there is nothing better than packing bubbles . . . who knew.

Some before church pictures my Dad snagged.  Sick Drew, caretaker Ansen and I all stayed home.

And then the wheelchair . . . provided some extra fun . . . for all of us.

 

And I'll admit, I was full on jealous when they played Just Dance 3 and I just sat there.

And last but definitely best . . . we got to Skype Jeff on Monday.

We sure missed him, but being able to actually see his face and see him tell jokes made it better.  He's doing great! (look how cute and excited my Mom is . . . I love this picture lisa took)

I wish they would remember

I figure that Addison is probably my only child that will have real memories of the accident and life after the accident. Olivia might have some vague memories and I'm pretty sure Drew will have none. I'm partly glad they'll never remember. But I (a lot) wish they would remember.

I wish they would remember the struggle so they'll know and they'll remember the blessings from our Heavenly Father.

I wish they would remember so they'll know how much their Dad loves their Mom.

I wish they would remember so they can see how important family is and how much they rescued us.

I wish they would remember the the meals that come every night and the people that have generously served us in every possible way.

Grandma Watkins' House (for me)

On the fourth of July we parked near my Grandma Watkins' house and we got to walk right by it on our way back to the car. 
(I've had these pictures for months, but haven't gotten a post put together and since I have time now . . . ) 

My dad was born and raised here. 
We vacationed here every year with my Grandma. 
We lived here while Dad went back to school and Grandma went on her mission. 
Ansen and I spent several weeks cleaning it out after she had to move to a retirement community.

I started telling Addison some of my childhood memories on the walk and they just kept coming and coming.  So many things I hadn't thought about in years or almost totally forgotten. 

The house used to be mint green with white trim.  There was no fence and a few more evergreens.  The screen door that slammed shut every time you went in and out is gone, but I do remember how darn hard it was to remember NOT to let it slam shut every time.

 

This is the corner of the sidewalks.  I still love that the street names are in the side walks.  Ryan and I used to "own" different streets and have to pay a toll to ride our bikes on the other street.

 The rain gutters flowed under the street.   If we were feeling adventurous (and disobedient) we'd race our sticks through the gutter to the other side of the street.

These are the neighbor's rose bushes.  Ryan was chasing my Dad, my Dad jumped over them thinking Ryan would stop, but Ryan ran through them and got a million scrapes . . . he cried and cried.

This is the fence that our little neighbor was hanging from when his hand went through the top wires.  I ran for help while Ryan held him up.  The fence used to be about 10 feet tall and somehow now is only 3 feet tall. 

My Grandma threw a peach pit in the dirt next to the back door and a Peach tree started to grow . . . she didn't want to chop it down so she just let it grow and almost take over the doorway (it's actually gone now so it was even closer that the one you see) . . . I always thought that was funny.

We used to sit in lawn chairs on the grass between the house and garage drinking grape soda and eating root beer popsicles while the adults talked.  That's also where I watched my Grandma eat a tomato out of the garden like it was an apple.  Funny, right?

The old red truck always sat in the driveway.  It had a small hole in the floor and you could see the road moving as we drove and even cooler . . . it had no seat belts.

Herb lived next door.  He taught us "See you late alligator" and "In awhile crocodile."  He made Ryan and I carved wooden pins one day.  Mine was a flower and I kept it for almost forever.  He kept his house and yard in immaculate condition.

The flagpole that my grandma really wanted.  We got to help put the flag up and down, but we could not hang on the ropes.  It was several 100 feet taller back then though and it wasn't red and rusted.

I stubbed my toe on a rock (?) while running through the sprinkles one summer and broke it.  I had to wear my mom's big tennis shoe the rest of the trip so my broken toe wouldn't be too smashed.

There were all sorts of cool trees around Grandma's house.  There were 4 in particular that were the coolest.  One had these leaf things that were like airplane wings that we would throw around so they'd fly

Another had pods full of seeds.  We'd pick them and then strip all the seeds out into piles. 

And then there were 2 down the street that had these big, brown nut things and another that made pokey bombs.  Ryan and I would gather the bombs, twist them around by the stem and throw them at each other.

There was a park down the street with a baseball field.  I don't think my dad played, but we'd walk down there on summer nights and watch some games.

And where that flag pole is . . . there used to big this really cool machine gun from some war we loved to play on.  How sad that's it's gone . . . it was seriously awesome.

Grandma's church was a 2-story building.  Primary was upstairs . . . it was so, so neat stomping around upstairs.  We always had to hang around and talk to people after church . . . so boring.

(this is also where I stood for 30 minutes waiting for Ansen to pick me up . . . he didn't want to be slowed down with my picture taking excursion)

Addendum

The cape did not solve the problem for long and he's right back at it.

And now instead of "flying" he's "prancing" around.

And it's not in focus, but you get the twirling idea here.

I can't wait until it's summer and we're out playing soccer, baseball, night games and in dirt . . . I'll have to make sure I take just as many pictures of those "hobbies" to post.

Addison (to Ansen):  You're the best Dad in the world.

Olivia:  No, Mike LeBaron is.

Our neighbor, Mike.  SLAM. 

You gotta love this as a parent, right?  Please tell me things like this happens to everyone.

He gave them pencils from his work that changed colors that morning which they were thrilled with . . . at least we're hoping that explains a lot.

6 weeks!

So it's already been 6 weeks ago yesterday that I got in my accident.  It's kind of gone by fast like in that it feels like just 3 minutes . . . under water. 

That's a smile in this picture.  I remember thinking I was smiling big . . . we needed some good, happy pictures from the hospital, right? 

I actually don't think I look that bad, since everything broken was inside and there was nothing they could do for it on the outside.  Plus another miracle in it's own, is the only outside mark was where the glass sprayed all over my hand.

Really some parts feel fast and some parts feel so unbearably long!  The day before Christmas Eve I finally sat myself up in bed for the first time!  It was text worthy and as soon as I struggled and got myself upright, I texted Ansen a happy dance text and got a non-happy dance "good job" back.  Trust me, it deserved more.

(That's my bright pink blanket some friends brought me . . . the best thing in the whole hospital room . . . and all the flowers.  I wish I had gotten a picture . . . I just don't know where my head was . . . all the flowers were beautiful.)

Sometimes I am so impressed with my own accomplishments and then I think, well it's been 6 stinkin' weeks . . . I should be able to get my own leg off the bed. 

Olivia says she wishes she had a Mom . . . I told her she has one . . . but she wants one that can do stuff like, walk and "other Mom stuff" . . . what does barking orders from my bed not count?

(this was my worst day - besides the first 2 days anyway - in the hospital  . . . I was so, so sick again that day and I was suppose to feeling better.  I can't remember that day hardly at all . . . luckily, right?)

I do remember thinking that I was definitely a high functioning narcotics user.  I seemed to be able to think and process everything just as clear on the drugs as off . . . other than I would have random outbursts (like "it's all yellow in here") and then have to tell Ansen that I had no idea what I was saying and to ignore me.  Plus I had really violent body twitches.  I've now read some of the emails and texts I wrote (even to clients) and I'm mad that Ansen actually gave me a computer and let me go at it. 

Luckily the first 3 weeks are a complete and absolute haze.  And luckily I'm seeing new improvements almost daily now, so I'm thinking we can only go up from here.