Mom Math

1 Ignored dirty diaper on an otherwise naked boy

+

1 Boy who likes to play with the tag in the back of his pants

=

2 Messy hands waving a gross paci at mom while the boy spits at the yucky taste

+

1 Mom on a hunt to discover where else the boy wiped his hands

+

The New House

As per request, here is the new house. (No pictures b/c our camera was dropped. So you get John's walking tour instead!)

Poop!

Edward did it! On the potty! We're just so proud.

I should mention that the way it happened is not repeatable. And we have no expectations of it happening again in the near future. But it was still great!

Birthday Gifts for Christ

I accidentally posted this to the wrong blog! But it's something that's becoming a beloved tradition at our house, so I though I'd leave it here too. Enjoy!

Our family has several birthdays during the month of December. A few years ago I realized that this gave us the perfect opportunity to talk about Christ's birthday.

Throughout the month, as we're talking about what to give and what each of my boys wants for their birthday, we make a point of mentioning Jesus's birthday as well. We discuss all of the different things we could give him and try to come up with the things he would most want from us this year. In the past, our choices have been things like obedience to our parents, helping our siblings, and reading our scriptures together more.

Even if you don't have December birthdays, the season of giving will offer many opportunities to discuss what we can give our Savior.

Or, try throwing a birthday party for Jesus as an FHE. Act out the nativity as your party game, celebrate with cake, and give presents by recording what you will give Jesus as a gift this year, either in pictures or in your journal.

I can attest to how wonderful it is to turn the world's focus on gifts back towards the true meaning of Christmas. Give it a try this year!

Homeowners!

That's right! We've acquired a mortgage! Merry Christmas to us!

This was our big project that's been in the works this last month. We were able to meet the realtor, look at a crazy number of houses, research our top options, and make an offer in under a week! It was intentionally fast so that John would be able to do the house-hunting with me before starting work. Then we closed a few weeks later.

I'll post pictures as soon as I remember to take some. These next few weeks will involve lots of cleaning, painting, packing and unpacking. We plan to be completely moved in to have Christmas in our new house.

The details? It's in a great town with a fabulous school system just a few minutes north of where we are now. The house is large, with enough rooms for a guest bedroom, a playroom, and an office. We're across the street from a park with several playscapes, a stream, a wooded area, and lots of open space to run. Also a pool! And as an extra bonus, the elementary school is on the other side of the park. We'll be able to walk there in less than 10 minutes.

So for Thanksgiving this year, I am grateful that we've come out on the other side of this year, not only stronger, but much better off than when the year began.

Round Two

Ethan was discharged from the hospital Thursday morning. With the meds, he was (and is) doing just fine. Still has the cold, but can breathe easy. So I went to make an appearance at work.

When I came home around 11:30 that night, John said that Edward was having a really hard time sleeping. He's had the same cold and was coughing and tossing and turning. I was pretty confident that I knew what it was. Unfortunately, I was right. The boy was wheezing and sucking hard to get air in. Not nearly as hard as Ethan had been, but hard enough.

Back to the ER we went. We weren't rushed right back this time, but ulitimately the experience was the same. Nurses, drs, and respiratory therapists. Breathing treatments and an x-ray. Our nurse from two nights before did a double take when she walked by and saw me. It was nice to be remembered. The respiratory therapist was one of the ones who treated Ethan as well.

After a few hours we were able to go home. New nebulizer and prescriptions in hand. (Now we have the full set of asthma treatments at home!)

Edward's diagnosis wasn't asthma, mearly a tightening as a reaction to a virus, called bronchiolitis. But it could be a sign of things to come.

This virus has been a nasty one for our boys, so if you don't see us around until it's gone, it's because we're trying not to share!

Hospital Stay

Two nights ago, Ethan had a cold. Not really a bad one, but oh did his body react. Ethan started to have trouble breathing, so we took him to the ER where he was diagnosed as having a major asthma attack. We'd hoped a breathing treatment or two would ease things and we'd be home. We weren't so lucky.

By that first morning, Ethan had figured out where everything in the ER was. (He was in the ER for 12 hours. First the PICU didn't have room, then they downgraded him and they didn't have a room in intermediate care, and finally they downgraded him again and we got a regular room.) Ethan was fine with it. He'd been introduced to the game cabinets in the ER and was happily playing away.

When we moved to his room, we hung out for a while to give the numerous drs, nurses, and respiratory therapists do their assessments. (Mom, your bag of fun was a big help during room-time.) Then Ethan asked where the hospital's toys were. So we spent much of the day in the Child Life playroom. Only popping out every hour or to be checked by the nurse and get his breathing treatments. We also discovered some garden areas that had fun things to climb on and walk around.

Honestly, if he didn't have to be woken up in the middle of the night, Ethan would love to live at the hospital. All the attention! All the places to explore!

He'll be coming home today, but the treatments and steroids will continue for a while. And we might avoid you if you're sick :)

We'd like to thank the friends who stepped in to make things easier. One who came over late at night so that we wouldn't have to take Edward with us. Another who took Edward all the next day so that mom and dad could take turns being with Ethan and sleeping. And yet another, with plenty of asthma experience, who volunteered to take both boys this afternoon if John and I need to make appearances at work. And of course, to all who expressed their concerned and offered prayers for our guy. THANK YOU!

Becoming a Smooth Stone

Things are looking up around here. (Very, very up. But more on that in the coming weeks.)

As we are finishing up this tough year and beginning new things, I've been particularly impressed to pay close attention to what we've been through. To see how each tough thing, no matter how small, polished off a rough edge.

Ethan asks me about the crosses on other churches on a regular basis. We always talk about how we don't celebrate the crucifixion, but the atonement and resurrection. Last week, it struck me exactly how different that makes us from other religions. We know that the plan we agreed to doesn't allow for the Lord to snap his fingers and make everything easy. The plan requires sacrifice, in many different ways.

Heavenly Father had to sacrifice his son to give us all the chance for eternal life.

Eve had to eat the fruit, sacrificing life in the garden of Eden so that the Lord's other commandment could be obeyed and we could all come to earth.

We've all chosen to sacrifice an easy life for the freedom of choice. To become the wondrous person the Lord sees inside, we have a lot of learning to do. And we all know that lessons stick when you've learned them the hard way.

So here we are. Coming out of a rough year. Feeling a little smoother. A little less rough.

On my mind

1. Ethan can sound out and write all of his letters now. So instead of "spelling" by yelling out a stream of random letters, he's working hard to hear each of the letters in the correct order. I love that he works so hard! He's even managing to read a few short words by sounding out the letters!

2. Edward backed off on wanting to use the potty for a while. But the interest seems to be back. He saw a potty at Target last week and fell in love. (It's frog shaped.) He's been sitting on it multiple times every day. No success yet, but the dry diapers all day and the overfull ones at night indicate that he's learning some control. We'll get there.

3. Please don't tell me how thin I look. I'm very aware. My pants are hanging off of me and all the baby weight has disappeared. (Wish the extra skin would too!) Even my face is thinner. This was not an intentional weight loss. It was achieved by a combination of stress, too little sleep, frequently eating only one real meal a day, and lots of Dr. Pepper to keep the blood sugar up and the headaches at bay. I am looking forward to gaining some weight back in Dec. Then losing it in a much more healthy manner.

4. So happy for John. He's loving his new job. It's exactly the type of growth opportunity he was looking for, and they need him there so badly. He jumped right in, meeting with people to figure out what he needed to learn, interviewing someone to do their SEO, and scheduling a business trip to get some hands on experience. Nine months was worth the wait!

5. Think I might attempt to fold the many, many loads of laundry and clean a bathroom or two before having to go to work. Better get started...

Goodnight Moon with a Twist

As a fan of speculative fiction, I absolutely love this review of Goodnight Moon. It's so good, I couldn't keep it to myself.

(Please don't read it if you want to continue to think of Goodnight Moon as a sweet children's book.)

Ummm... I think I forgot to mention...

We've been crazy busy this last week or so. Much, much busier than usual. All because we're making some big changes around here.

It all started when JOHN GOT A JOB!!!

That's right. After almost 9 months of unemployment, my husband will start his new job on tuesday! Can I tell you how relieved and excited I am?

We've been getting the ball rolling on a few major changes during this final week of joblessness. I'll be sure to let you know about them as they happen!

Listening

As we've been particularly focused on pleading with the Lord for John to get a job, I've been thinking a lot about how I listen for an answer. Or really, how He speaks to me.

Usually, it's a gut feeling kind of thing. Something just feels right. We're in Austin right now because of one of those. The more I fight against those feelings, the stronger He makes them, until there is no room for doubt.

I've had physical experiences when He needed me to know right then that something was right. As in, punched in the stomach, knocked the wind out of me experiences. Went to BYU and married John because of those.

I've even had an audible answer. If you don't remember, I got my Edward because of it.

I received the strangest one yet last month. While I was in the shower, BEFORE going to the temple, I received a clear picture in my mind. Literally a picture. A picture that will be a comfort to me for the rest of my life. Couldn't even focus on what we'd planned to pray about at the temple, because this picture was reinforced for me the whole day. It didn't even answer the question I'd had. Simply put it in perspective. With a picture. (No, I'm not going to share. Probably ever.)

Finally, I'm becoming more aware that He's talking all the time. And part of me has been listening. All those little day-to-day inspirations as a mom and a wife that I'd taken for granted. That somehow I hadn't realized I'd been enjoying. I'm sure there's even more that I'm missing because I'm not listening as well as I could.

Gotta love those big answers, but it's the little ones that affect me every day. I need to focus on hearing those better. To work on being a better listener.

It's the next morning and I feel the need to clarify. I don't mean to brag that I've had all these memorable answers to prayers. Not at all. In fact, I'm a little bit embarrassed by how the Lord has to talk to me. Because apparently I miss the little messages. I just don't get it unless he "sends me a sign". So I need to work on being a better listener.

Yummmm

Have you seen Foodzie yet? It's like edible Etsy.

The Pantry and Spices section makes me crave time in my kitchen to try out one or ten. Honey and Jam is making my mouth water. (Raspberry Cocoa Preserves! Macadamia Nut Blossom Honey!!) The Bakery..., well you know me and all things baked just go together. And I could spend my life's savings in Chocolate and Candy.

I'm having to force myself to think long and hard about what my first purchase will be. To keep myself from buying up everything I see. Maybe it'll be that honey...

I must be crazy

Because I've been feeling like I don't have time to do anything for me, I decided to commit myself to something else. I've joined the Daring Bakers.

What does that mean?

Every month, a host (chosen from the membership) challenges us with something they've been wanting to try. The recipe is a secret for everyone but the membership until the end of the month when we all reveal how we did at once. It's a commitment because you have to participate nearly every month to stay a part of the group.

For September, we made puff pastry. Absolutely crazy. I've posted about how I did on my other, sorely neglected blog. So if you're interested in my massive failure, go check it out!

Pictures while cleaning

Our house was an absolute wreck after a few weeks of a mom who was too busy, kids who were sick, and over-full weekends. We spent all day cleaning and have managed to get our house back into livable shape.

After cleaning the playroom, Ethan reminded me that we needed to make room for his preschool artwork on the walls. The picture is documenting the wall of artwork from last year. We took it all down and saved just a few. Ethan is so excited about filling it up again this year!


At the end of a very long, very busy day, John and I sat down for our "date night". Looks like fun, huh? Folding laundry while we watch a movie is becoming a regular thing.

Challenge Update

So....

We've completely blown past the $25 a week. We were doing well until last night when John decided we were having an at home date night and picked up some things for a nice dinner. And then today Ethan and I picked up school lunch items. (Because he would have had some strange lunches otherwise.) And Sunflower market has 5 lbs of potatoes for 99 cents! (Starting tomorrow for you TX folks.) Gonna stock the freezer with some hash browns and french fries. Plus, a trip down to Sunflower means stocking up on a few things I can only find there. I don't make it down very often.

The plan for the next three weeks is to only buy milk and fruit. (Plenty of veggies in the freezer.) Barring great sales on items I need to stock up on, we shouldn't go too far over.

Budget Challenge

We've been living pretty frugally these last several (seven!?!) months. At the beginning we spent nearly nothing and managed to eek by when it came to the bills. Then with both unemployment and my job, we relaxed a little. Still not extravagant, but we aren't being as conscious of our spending as we should.

With the end of unemployment checks looming, we're trying to get ourselves ready. I've decided to attempt Owlhaven's sept grocery challenge. She has a family of 12 and it cutting her budget to $75 a week! (Really only possible because it's harvest time in her garden/farm.) For me, that's going to mean no more than $25 a week. I think I could do it with less, but this challenge is for me, not John. And that wonderful man does the majority of the cooking while I'm working. So I need to stay under budget while not making life too hard on him.

$25 a week isn't to bad for us at the moment. We have a large amount of dry goods in our food storage and a well stocked pantry thanks to food stamps back in the spring. Really, we only need milk, fresh fruit and veggies, and the occasional loaf of bread when I can't fit in making it myself. Plus a few odds and ends each week so that John doesn't have to spend lots of time every evening in the kitchen.

I think it's more than doable. Wish me luck!

Church Growth

Any idea what the growth of our church looks like? I didn't. But now I do!



(For those of you who aren't LDS, a stake is a group of congregations (or wards as we call them), generally about three thousand to five thousand members in five to ten congregations.)

Rice

Gotta love how little it takes to keep them entertained!

(I do wish that I'd thought to put down a sheet or at least pre-sweep so that I could reclaim all the spilled rice. Next time.)

Edited: I wanted to note that they played with this for over an hour! The extra cleanup was totally worth it.

Laughing Through Life

After returning from our big outing today (a ten minute trip to drop off school paperwork for the dr to sign), it occured to me that life has been a little boring.

So I thought I'd share a few glimpses of my boys that made me laugh or smile this last week.

* Edward dumping water on the living room rug and then dancing as he splashed in it. (This was while swearing under my breath that he'd figured out how to make yet another kind of sippy cup leak.)

* Ethan rolling his eyes at me for singing along to a "Word World" song. ("You can never have too many OO's" is a catchy song! And I know mom. It's payback time.)

* Edward singing along to the same song a few minutes later. Doodly-oo is such a fun word to hear from his little mouth.

* Ethan saying all morning that he was tired and should probably take a nap. (I had a yeah-right kind of laugh at this one. He didn't nap, but he did lay on his bed and read books for over an hour.)

* Edward's run. It's hilarious.

* Ethan's excitement when I showed him how to use a Magic Eraser to clean up Edward's wayward coloring.

* Edward's imitation of his brother when I leave for work. Even if I've already said good-bye to him, if Ethan gets a bigger hug or a real kiss, Edward comes over for the same. Gotta love those little arms giving hugs and the slobbery kisses.

Not very exciting. But these boys are constantly reminding me why I'm pushing through. Give me a few of those moments a day and it's all worth it.

Ant Migration

We're watching this out the back door today.



The fire ants that live in our walls are migrating across the patio. They're moving thousands of eggs to a new mound (or several) in the yard. Cool to watch. Scary because I discovered them when letting Edward out in the backyard to play.

How do we feel about having new fire ant mounds in our yard? We're thrilled. These ants have been in our walls since we moved in over a year ago. Once we realized it, we sprayed the interior walls to keep them away from us. As long as they went outside for their food and left us alone, we kept a tense peace with them.

Now, once they've moved out their eggs, we can spray the exterior of the house and keep them from coming back in. And a through walk of the yard will reveal the mounds and we can treat those too.

Maybe, for a few days at least, we can call our house allergen free!

19 months old and Counting

We joke about how smart our kids are, but this is getting ridiculous.

Dental Adventures, Part 2

Somehow, I neglected to mention that in the same week Edward had his big makeover, Ethan's looks underwent a major change. (This post might be long and boring for most of you, so if you just want to see the change, scroll to the video.)

After looking for a new dentist (for a second opinion and in-house anesthesia if necessary) and the interruption of job loss (meaning no dental insurance), we finally had Ethan's teeth evaluated again.

The new dentist spent an hour talking Ethan through the x-rays, but didn't manage a cleaning at his first visit. Looking at the x-rays showed that Ethan did need some of the work recommended by the first dentist. Two crowns in the back instead of multiple fillings (but not the root canals, thank goodness), several small fillings, and a problem with a front tooth that we had two options for. But because he was so resistant, our little Ethan would have to go under general anesthesia.

Because most of the work was on his molars, which he needs for the next ten years or so, we couldn't ignore it. So we scraped together the money and made the appointment.

The day of, before I would sign the final consent, I had two discussions. First with the pediatric anesthesiologist. I asked not only about Ethan's experience (what they'd do while he was still awake, how kids usually come out of this particular type of anesthesia, and how much he would remember) but also some medical questions. I liked this guy and wasn't worried about Ethan at all. It probably helped that his name was Dr. Heaton. (I would still have rather entrusted Spencer with this, but he lives to far away. Next time??)

The second discussion was with the dentist about that front tooth. Ethan had a cavity that ran the length of the tooth. He'd actually had it for several years, but every dentist before would treat it with fluoride and say not to worry about it. We really couldn't ignore this deep channel down his tooth anymore. The problem was that a traditional filling would fall right out. So our options were to cap it with a plastic crown or pull it. Initially we'd planned to go with the crown, but it's also likely to get knocked off multiple times before the tooth falls out on its own. And with Ethan, that would likely mean more anesthesia to replace it. I went with the obvious decision and had them pull it.

Now, even though it made sense (and was cheaper), I still felt bad about it for a few weeks. It was hideous. The tooth next to it stuck way out and there was a gaping hole. I'd go look at him in the middle of the night and cry about what I'd done to him. But now that the hole has healed up and the other tooth has shifted a little, he just looks like an older kid. Good thing too, because his teeth seem to be on a late schedule. He'll have that gap for the next 4 years or so.

Would you like to see it? Not a great video, but be grateful you can't see the hole very well. This was the day he had the work done.

Exciting Week

In the last week we've:

- Visited family in San Antonio
- Played lots with Grandma J
- Started swim lessons for Ethan
- Rearranged the ENTIRE house (The beds and most of the dressers are in the same places. Not much else.)
- Braved a fire-ant attack on Edward's feet that caused a major allergic reaction
- And added our first Epi-pen to the diaper bag for the next time the fire ants are too interesting to stay away from

Plus all the regular stuff. Thanks Grandma J for all the help!

Good Busy

I was just realizing how much I managed to pack into the last couple of days. I always feel like I fit in more when less of it is focused on things at home. Here's my last four days.

We attended the temple with some friends who were taking out their endowments and being sealed. I spent at least an hour each visiting three sisters who just needed someone to spend time with them. I spent a morning grocery shopping for a sister who is living on so much less than we are. And I babysat the adorable kids of a friend whose been sick for a while.

All while washing 8 loads of laundry, cooking dinner during a short morning at home, keeping the mess to a dull roar, making it to the tax office to register the van (finally), playing in the pool with my boys long enough to sunburn, working one of the worst shifts I've ever had (and another that was only marginally better), and getting enough sleep!

Ethan has just reminded me that I promised to play picnic with him before I attack the mountain of laundry that needs to be folded. So I'm off to start another busy day.

No More Curls

John finally decided that Edward was going to get a haircut. He was smart enough to tell me before he did it, or I would have refused to speak to him for a week!

I miss the curls. A lot. They cut off the last of his babyness!

John posted video of before, during, and after on his blog so that you can see my baby turn into a toddler. Check it out!

Talk? On Tape? No Way

These are a few of our attempts to get Edward to talk on tape. None were very successful. I will recommend that you turn up the volume to hear the few words he does say.

Watch how well our son has learned to shoot a "gun"! Sounds and everything! We're so proud.


I don't acknowledge it in the video, but Edward says "You're Welcome" for no apparent reason.


Here's the video where all the animals say "moo". I usually don't have to prompt him like this, but at least it shows his silly personality. If you listen closely after he decides to ignore me, he says "animal goes in there" twice and then gives them an order to "play." And for the grandparents, be sure to watch to the very end!

The Things We Teach Our Boys

First, we seem to be encouraging Edward to do gross things. You can't see it very well on the video, but that boy's finger disappears up past his fingernail...



And second, Ethan has finally gotten his first real bike! Thanks Great-Grandpa! With very little coaching from us, he took off and loved every second of it.



More videos to come! (Thanks to John who uploaded them ;)

Talking Video - Not Happening

I've been trying to get video of Edward talking. He narrates his life for us normally. But try to record it and the words slow to a trickle. Only grandparents, and really bored ones at that, would like the videos we've managed.

The biggest problem is that if you say a word, like "walk" or "swimming", he immediately wants to do it and runs off. I tried sitting him down with his farm animals, but after naming each one, he grinned and insisted that they all "moo". But only until I put the camera down. Then they went back to their usual noises. Prankster.

So we'll keep trying. But the only way I can guarantee you'll hear Edward's cute narration is for you to come visit!

Grandpa G.

I'm in NY for a few days to attend my grandfather's funeral and spend some time with family. And in a way it's been fun to remember what an amazing man he was. (And still is.)

Here's an excerpt from his obituary to illustrate:

"Walt continued his studies at the University of California, Berkley, where his thesis advisor was Nobel Laureate Glen Seaborg, and was awarded his PhD in Nuclear Chemistry in May of 1956. After completing his PhD he served in the Air Force until 1958, when he moved to Basking Ridge, NJ to work for Bell Telephone Laboratories as a member of the Technical Staff. While at Bell Labs, he did groundbreaking research in semiconductor detectors, radiation effects, and ion channeling which led to the success of the Telstar satellite. In 1976 Walt moved his family to their home in Clarksville, NY where he took a position as the Chairman of the Physics department at the University at Albany, State University of New York (much to the delight of his children who thought it was funny that a chemist would be in charge of a physics department). He also held positions as the Acting Vice President for Research and Dean of Graduate Studies, and the Director of the Center for X-Ray Optics. His favorite professional title, though, was that of Distinguished Service Professor which he was awarded in 1988. In 1998 he co-founded X-ray Optical Systems and served as the Chief Technology Officer until his death. His latest research was in collaboration with the Alzheimer's Center of Albany Medical Center."

His professional accomplishments overlap a little with the man I knew through the many, many grad students and post-doc students he nurtured and took on as a part of his extended family. (Everyone was family to grandpa and was therefore worthy of a full measure of his love.)

What I left out of the excerpt above was his childhood and early adulthood. During those early years of his life, grandpa was a sheepherder, movie stunt-man, saxophone player in a jazz band, and even worked as a tour guide in the grand canyon where he was privileged to guide Ansel Adams. Oh how I'll miss the stories about his youth!

But one of my favorite memories is one that only a very few others share. Grandpa Camp. When all of the older cousins would be dropped off for what seemed like weeks. Maybe it was. We'd have free reign of the farm, including the giant climbing tree, and would end the day by telling grandpa about all our adventures. We'd clomp around the house in his clogs. He'd take us hiking on the nature trails nearby to look for salamanders. He'd take us to campus to poke around his office and swim in the big fountain. And he'd tell stories. So many stories.

I'm going to miss those stories. And the completely unconditional love he shared with everyone he met.

Mother's Day

Going into this mother's day, I was concerned about how it would go. This last week I've been feeling very inadequate at home. Missing the things I was able to do before. Like making dinner for everyone. And kissing Ethan before he goes to bed. And keeping a semi-tidy house. And being able to just hang out with my boys instead of rushing through life.

I've been feeling bad enough that I've had to fight back tears a few times at work when I would realize what I was missing at home. And to stab my heart a little worse, Ethan's prayer last night included a plea that mom not have to go to work anymore.

So you can see how I was afraid of talks about all of the wonderful things moms do for and with their kids. I was not emotionally prepared to sit through discussions of all the things I can't fit in at the moment. Part of me was ready to go home early instead of breaking down in church.

It was a wonderful blessing to hear talks from both a sweet mother and our child-less relief society president. They both spoke about how it's not a fancy dinner, or a tidy house, that makes you a good mother. It's the time you give your children. And the sacrifices you make.

I've finished today with a renewed sense that I'm being the best mother I can right now. That sacrificing some of my household duties, and even some of my time with the boys, is what they need. They need a safe home and food in their bellies. They need medical care. They need me to be making money.

It's been a surprisingly good mother's day. The chocolates and chance to send Edward to nursery didn't hurt either :)

Working Two Jobs

I've been avoiding talking about work. Not because I don't like it, but because I'm not adjusting as well as I'd like.

The paying job is great. The people I work with are intelligent and fun to be around. I enjoy the work.

The problem is that I can't give up my mom job. (Not that I want to, but you know what I mean.) John lets me sleep in a little, so I get enough sleep. But as soon as I'm up, I'm on the job. I have a 15 hour work day. 5 days in a row. Every week.

Those of you in TX, may have noticed that I've practically fallen off of the face of the earth. I apologize. Once we hit summer and I can get a mother's helper a few days a week, or some regular playdates lined up, I promise I'll pop my head into normal life a little more often.

For now just know that work is going well. But I'm exhausted.

Edward Introduces Time Out

Edward bit me today. It was accidental, but it really hurt. So I very firmly told him "NO BITING!" and put him on the floor. How does my sixteen month old react? Does he throw a tantrum? Does he get sad little tears? No way. He stood up and walked very deliberately to Ethan's time-out spot.

After the few seconds it took me to realize what had just happened, I walked over and gave him the after time-out talk. You know. "I love you, but can't blah blah blah." He jumped up and gave me a big hug. Just like Ethan has to be able to do before he can leave time-out. Then he walked away like everything was all better.

Freaky.

This boy scares me a little. Time-outs at 16 months?? I'm not sure I'm ready to raise this child.

Naptime Sweetness

Edward rarely resembles my sweet baby anymore. He is working hard at developing his tantrum skills. Usually, I get sick of him and decide to put him down for an early nap.

The instant his door closes, the screaming stops. I hear "On, on!" Edward helps me turn on his night-light and white noise machine. Then he snuggles in while we sit down. I sing his song while my adorable boy tells me where my nose, eyes, mouth, ears, and head are. After I lay him down, I always say the same things. Today, I heard them before I could open my mouth. "Goo-nie. Uv-oo. Byeeee!"

It was so hard to not go back and give him a big hug. But I really needed those two hours without screaming, yelling, and hitting. So I just smiled as I left.

I'm glad that I still have the naptime sweetness to remind me how much I love this guy.

Talking over Ice Cream

Ethan's directorial debut!



John reciprocated. (Please ignore the mess in the background. And Ethan's horribly long hair. It's been cut. But not Edward's. I'm not ready to give up the curls.)



And because I still can't believe it, this is how John let Edward eat his dinner a few weeks ago.

Checkups

Both boys had their well-checks today. They were champs.

Edward is at 25th percentile for weight, but 50th for height. He's already leaning out some like his brother. But with John's family's genes, so he won't be as tall. The dr was again impressed by his vocabulary. We've switched to only counting words we clearly understand, but that's still 50 or 60. And he's cutting 6 teeth at once, by my last count. Needless to say, he hasn't been very pleasant lately.

Ethan is at the top of the chart for height, but at 50th percentile for weight. (Yay for his weight coming up on the charts!) Long and lean. His checkup was more through. Cognitive and developmental tests, hearing and eyesight exams. He passed all but one with flying colors. The one was his eyesight. He's at 20/30. That left eye had a hard time with two letters on the small row. Not a worry at all right now, but he'll get glasses in a few years, I'm sure. Obnoxious genetics.

Ethan also got a prescription for allergy meds. Hopefully our days of sniffles and nights spent listening to him cough are over.

My favorite part of the boy's checkups is always the response these guys get from the drs and nurses. This dr calls them the smart brothers and praises them for their big brains. And one of the nurses today asked me if I was a school teacher because she was so impressed by how Ethan answered her questions during the eyesight and hearing test. (He was so cute. Whispering that he could hear the beep when it was a quite one.)

Unfortunately, the visit had to finish with shots. LOTS of them. I think that both boys hate being constrained even more than they hate the shots. So they start yelling at me the second I get their hands, and it turns to screams with the added pain of the shots. Unpleasant. Luckily Ethan is done until he's 11. Edward... he'll survive a few more.

Austin Singers Shameless Plug

Come see the Austin Singers! We're performing a collection of folk-songs arranged by John Rutter and a Haydn mass, with a chamber orchestra and wonderful soloists.

It's been fun (and a lot of work) to sing with this group. I can only hope that I'll be able to adjust my work schedule and be able to sing with them in the future. So just in case this is my only concert with the group, come hear us this saturday and sunday!

Saturday the 18th at 8pm, or Sunday the 19th at 4pm. Locations and ticket prices can be found here.

(For those of you in the ward - Tim Workman is the director. It's fun to see him in his element.)

Talking with Messy Boy

Just in case you missed this on John's blog---

Whirlwind

My typical day goes like this:
- Get up a little after the boys do and let John get out of the house
- Run errands, play, or if Edward's in a good mood, take care of some chores
- Lunch
- Put Edward down for a nap, Ethan in front of the Wii, and take a shower
- Get ready for work and sneak in another chore or two
- Hand-off the kids to John
- 8-hrs on my feet in the lab
- Come home and crash into bed

Working every evening is creating some problems that I'm not sure how to deal with. Notice two things. I only have time for a small handful of chores each day, and usually most of them involve loads of laundry or cleaning up after the last meal. And there is no down-time for me.

My house is becoming progressively messier and I just can't spend all weekend, every week, cleaning.

And I've started cutting back on sleep to get a few quiet minutes every day. Not a good solution.

I'm not complaining. I really enjoy my job and know that it's what I'm supposed to be doing right now. And part of the reason this job is right is because it allows me to be home with my boys for much of their day.

But after two weeks, I'm seeing that we're going to need to make some changes around here. It's been a whirlwind. I need to feel like I have my feet under me again.

Any suggestions?

Rain

It's been raining all week in our neck of the woods. From small showers to long thunderstorms to an exciting hailstorm. Did you know that I love rain?

I love the sound. The slaps of the drops as they hit. The rolls of thunder (that can go on for whole minutes out here!).

I love the visual. It's calming to watch, like the ocean waves. And although the sky is gray, it turns the grass and trees a brilliant green.

I love the nourishment. Our lawn is flourishing. (Remember how dead it was before?) Our trees are blooming. And our rose bushes are growing like weeds.

My Boys

As much as my boys get in the way of my desire to sit on my butt doing nothing, I can't help but love them.

Ethan has been so sweet lately. He's helpful and kind and says the most wonderful things. I hear that I'm cute several times a day, and he will always jump up to help me out as long as the request isn't ridiculous. I can't figure out why he thinks I'm so great, but he tells me all the time that he loves me. I must be doing something right! (Actually, I'm going to pat my husband on the back for this one. Ethan treats me the way John does. He's a great example to his boy.)

Edward is our clown. He's always figuring out new ways to make us laugh. My current favorite is how he yells"POOOOOOOP!" when he needs a diaper change. Most of the time everyone else gets in on it and we all crack up while yelling "POOOOOOOP!" (And there is the added bonus that he's easier to change when he's giggly!)

Can I mention my husband again? Not many husbands would be willing to be a single dad five evenings a week. Not only will John do it, but he'll be great at it.

I'm a lucky woman to have these boys in my life.

Obligation

Five rabbis recently visited Salt Lake City to visit LDS sites and learn about our church. The visited BYU, a temple that was open for tours, temple square, welfare square, and LDS Humanitarian services.

Afterward, they shared what they learned. Most of their comments are what I would have expected. They found more in common with us then they would have thought. They wanted to spend days at the Family History Center doing genealogy research. They were impressed with the organization of our welfare and humanitarian services.

But one comment jumped out and smacked me in the face.

Rabbi Isaac Jeret said "Volunteerism in the Mormon Church is about obligation rather than about choice. The choice is to become a member of the Church. But once one is, there's a sense of covenanted responsibility. One of the things we've lost is the sense that to volunteer is actually something that is an obligation, and to work — to do — is an obligation. It's really inspiring to see a community that has retained that core religious value."

I agree with him, but it's something I tend to forget. I made a choice to belong to this church. And with that I accepted an obligation to serve others. The majority of the service I render is through my calling and as a visiting teacher, but am I looking for other opportunities? Am I aware of the needs around me, or am I blinded by my own selfishness?

I'm going to mull this over for the next few days. And pray about it, obviously. There is something there I need to learn, but I'm not sure what it is yet.

A Job! A Job!

That's right. I'm going back to work full-time. Starting next week, I'll be the bread-winner around here. Same thing I've done before, in the lab, but at the central lab for a chain of clinics instead of a hospital.

We're excited to have some real money coming in again. And it will give John the chance to find the right job instead of something to just pay the bills and cover health insurance.

For those of you worried about the kids, I'll be working the 3-11 shift. I'll be home with them for most of the day. While John is contracting and job searching, he'll take over for me at about 2. When he needs to do something in the afternoons, or when he finally goes back to work, we'll only need to find babysitting for a couple of hours. So most of the time, the boys will be with one of us.

Honestly, as worried as I am about how I'll manage everything at home on this new schedule, I'm really excited. I'm looking forward to getting my hands dirty again. (Figuratively.) I've actually been feeling a little bit lacking as a mom. I'm not innately good at it and it's burning me out. The prospect of doing something that I'm really, really good at is energizing.

So that's the big news around here! I'm spending this last week of freedom getting ready. Making lists of easy and make-ahead meals that John can have on the table in under 30 minutes. Figuring out a new daily chores schedule for myself. Buying new scrubs. Finding out who would be interested in babysitting when we need it. (Anyone? We can't pay much, but our kids are fun!)

The transition is going to make for an interesting few weeks. Wish me luck!

Stinky Bacteria

John came home from his week-long innovator's road trip with some super-stinky clothes. Not dirty John stink. Anaerobe stink. (That's right you lab rats out there. This one's for you.)

One of the stops on their road trip was to a distillery. I'm not sure what innovations they were able to learn about at a distillery, but they did learn that making hard liquor is smellier than you'd think. Apparently, after the fermentation step, they need to clean the excess water they'd used. How, you ask? With anaerobes. The smelliest class of bacteria out there. I'm not sure how that makes the water cleaner...

John got in so late last night that he dropped everything by the door and went to bed. This morning when I sat down in the living room about five feet from the front door, I suddenly sat up and jumped into action. I could smell a nasty bacteria and I wanted it found and destroyed. I said "I know that smell!" And John replied "It's my jacket. From the anaerobe room."

Yikes! Needless to say, John's laundry did not wait another second. The suitcase will be disinfected too. I don't care if it's just the smell. I don't want even a single one of those bacteria in my house!

Stuck at Home

I've always considered myself a homebody. Typically, I'd rather be at home than go out. But not lately.

When we moved to TX, we sold our second car. We fully expected to buy another when we arrived, but ended up not really needing it. John had a regular ride to work and just didn't need a car. For the first time in many years, we were a one car family!

Now that John is unemployed, we have a problem. He spends most days meeting people, networking, going to events to meet other people, contracting, and generally being out of the house. It's great for the job search. If the market was better, John would be well settled in a new job already.

But it's not great for me. I've found that I liked to be a homebody when I could choose to stay home. To ignore the errands and invitations and just spend the day playing with my boys and making yummy things. Now that I'm stuck at home, I'm sick of being here. I'm sick of all the extra cleaning because we're always here to mess things up. I'm sick of the boys whining because they're bored and want to go do something. I'm sick of staring at the same walls everyday.

In Boston, at least we could have walked places. Moody street was literally a few steps away, with all of the fun shops and restaurants to stop at. The library was only a few blocks. And the train was close enough that we could get into the city without a car. (Not that I ever did, because I had a car. But I could have!)

Here in TX, almost nothing is in walking distance. The grocery store would be doable if there were sidewalks. But I'm not risking my boys lives by walking them along the edges of those busy main roads. And I don't need groceries!! I really want to go to IKEA so that Ethan can play in the kid room while Edward and I pick up some new measuring spoons. Such a minor errand. But it would help our day go more smoothly.

Oh! I'd better end this. I hear the whining from one and the mean voice from the other. I've resigned myself to yet another day stuck at home.

Edward During the Prayer

Everyone watches their kids during prayers, right? I love to see what they do. Tonight at dinner I got a particularly good show.

When everyone folded their arms, I glanced over at Edward. Usually, he's busy shoving food in his mouth. Not today. He pulled his little hands against his chest and scrunched his face down. Over and over during the prayer, Edward would pull his hands away, look at his palms, and then pull them back into position. Each time tucking his head down to look at his hands.

I could have watched him all day. Too soon the prayer was over and he moved on to eating. But I will never forget my sweet 14 month old son trying so hard to fold his arms.

89 Degrees

Have I ever told you that I hate being hot? I haven't? I HATE being hot. A perfect summer day for me is in the sixties. Maybe the low seventies with a nice breeze. No hotter. And yet, I let my husband drag me to Texas. I know I was the one to decide it, but he still had to drag me kicking and screaming.

Mostly because I HATE BEING HOT!!

Today it was 89 degrees. In February. I was sweating. In February. It's just not right.

I know that those of you back home in the northeast are just counting the days until spring. And you'd kill for a hot sunny day.

Not me. I want a snowstorm. Feet and feet of snow. I want to be all bundled up in my wool sweaters and comfy socks, drinking hot cocoa. I want it all! The ice storms. The shoveling. The below freezing temps! I miss the winter!!

And all of you Texans who are reveling in your "wonderfully warm" winter? You won't be enjoying those extra degrees come summer three figure temps, will you.

I'm so not made for Texas. Someone back east wanna trade? Please???

Ethan's Prayers

I mentioned that Ethan added to his prayers to keep the monsters away.

Tonight, I listened more carefully to what he said. And I was wrong before.

Ethan hasn't been praying for Heavenly Father to keep him safe from the monsters. He's praying for Heavenly Father to help him feel safe.

I think that Ethan's logical mind has always known that there weren't any monsters in his room. But his fear of the dark and of being alone made it hard to remember that. So my smart little boy started praying for what he actually needed. Not safety from non-existent monsters. Just comfort.

I need to remember to do that. Simply ask for comfort.

Man. I love that kid.

I'm not ready!

Edward has decided to have a developmental spurt of sorts. It's so amazing to watch, but it makes me sad. I'm loosing my baby!

Over the weekend, Edward finally decided that walking was better than crawling. He's been walking some for months, but he acted like it was too much work for most trips across the floor. All of a sudden, he went from rarely walking to rarely crawling. We're still amazed when he walks from room to room jabbering away at us.

And the talking! We realized that his large vocabulary has changed. In the past, he understood us, would mimic the word, and point to what we were talking about. He did independently use a few words, but most were repeats after we said them.

Now, Edward says quite a few things on his own. Mostly types of food. And he's constantly trying to learn new words when we label things for him. (I love listening to him sound out new words.) The hard part is that he doesn't have many consonants. We're learning to hear the subtle differences between banana, bottle, bread, cup, ball, done, down, etc.

He has also developed more non-verbal communication. Some are obvious to anyone. When he brings you his shoes and sweatshirt, he wants to go outside. When he makes huge head gestures, he's saying yes. (I have to get video of him nodding yes. I find myself asking him questions all day just so that I can giggle at his giant nod.) Then there are the less obvious. When Edward reaches out his arm, then smacks himself in the head, he wants you to give him whatever he was "pointing" at. How can you refuse a request like that!

This boy is cracking me up. (Boy! Not baby!) I want him to stop right here. No more growing up. It's not allowed. I'm not ready.

Second Breakfast

Ethan, picking his cereal this morning:

"No, dad. That's for my second breakfast!"

We love our little hobbit.

He actually meant seconds, which is shocking. My non-eater ate three big servings of breakfast this morning!

Blessed Sleep

I sent out a plea for help six days ago. Thank you so much for all of your suggestions!

Here's what we did.

First, we cut out the nap. I've had a day or two where I really needed the break from him, but he has been much more ready to sleep at bedtime. (Added bonus, he'll occasionally tell me he needs to "rest his legs" and lay down on the guest bed with a book for ten minutes or so.)

Second, we cut down on the books. We've been reading two books ever since he was old enough to pick. Two was easy then because they were short board books. Now, two is kind of ridiculous. We cut it back to one and he hasn't complained at all. And it gives us the opportunity to reward him with an extra book without punishing ourselves.

Third, we put a fan in his room. We'd been frustrated with staying quiet so that we wouldn't get the "You woke me up" excuse. And even when we hadn't made a sound, kids playing football in the park across the street would make noise. (This may have contributed to the monsters fears.) The fan makes enough white noise to block out just about anything.

Fourth, and maybe the biggest, we found a new way to combat the "monsters" in his room. Our assurances of safety and "monster cleansing" techniques hadn't been enough to calm him down. But after several long talks about how God is bigger than the monsters and can keep us safe, Ethan came up with the idea that he should pray about it. So he now asks for Heavenly Father to keep him safe in his personal prayers each night. Now we only hear about silly monsters.

For six nights now, Ethan has gone right to bed. No screaming fits. No fighting. No hours of reappearing. It's wonderful. Thanks again for your help.

John Sings?

I love my husband. For oh so many reasons. One of them is that he sings.

WAIT! Hear me out!

I know he doesn't sing well. I still love that he does it.

The first time I sat next to John in church, I think I nearly gagged on my own spit when I heard him sing a hymn. I couldn't stop staring at him. He had to know what he sounded like, right? Being such an awesome girlfriend, I pointedly told him how bad he was.

Let's fast forward to when John met my family. I was much more afraid that he would turn and run as fast as he could than any kind of judgments my family would have. (I assumed they would be awed by his relative normalcy.) So we're sitting in church and the first hymn starts. My family is made up of trained singers or those who appreciate vocal music. The instant John opened his mouth, every head in our row turned very slowly in our direction. They were all looking at me with this "You're OK with this???" look on their faces. I think it was the most unified my family had been in many, many years.

By that point, I could laugh at them. John pointed out to me on that very first sunday that hymns are prayers. And that if I asked him to stop singing because I didn't like it, I'd be depriving him of saying those prayers.

Now I love that he has the guts to do it. That the prayers are more important to him. And I love that he sings to our kids. (They love it too.)

--------------------------------
I wrote this because I saw a writing prompt (and hilarious story), and because I was at choir rehearsal about an hour ago. It seemed appropriate.

The prompt is: Why even sing? Write about a time when people were singing badly.

Thank You

These last few weeks have been teaching us how many people care about us. We've received so many gestures of kindness and help. Because we've been so overwhelmed by the love everyone has shown us, we've been trying to say thank you to each person, no matter how small the gesture.

Today, I don't know who to say thank you to. You know who you are. Please know that what you did has made us feel very loved on a hard day. Thank you.

I Just Don't Understand

Ethan is still having issues with going to bed. Naptime and bedtime are the absolute worst times of my day. (And yes, he still needs his naps. You should see how much worse it is when he doesn't get them!)

He's had the same routine for most of his life and he makes sure we stick to it. Not a problem. The first issue is that he wants to switch the person doing it after each step. I think we may have allowed it some when he was younger, but not for some time. He knows that the person he chooses to put him to bed stays for the whole process. But everyday, he asks. And several times a week, he gets hysterical about it. We wrestle him into bed, offer him his prayer, songs, or holding hands (whatever comes next) three times, and move on to the next when he keeps screaming at us. (We've tried just doing them, but then he starts hitting. So now he has to tell us he wants them.) Eventually, we kiss him on the top of his head and leave him screaming. If he stays in bed, he eventually will scream himself to sleep.

You can imagine how much worse that whole process is when only one of us is home and he doesn't get to pick who puts him down. Like naptime. When the screaming keeps his brother from going down too. Fun for me.

I said "If he stays in bed..." This is an even bigger problem. Ethan will not stay in his room longer than five minutes. We'll see him every few minutes for HOURS. Sometimes he screams and cries, sometimes he just wimpers. But he always comes out. We've tried everything. We've calmly put him back in bed over and over. We've talked during the day and again at bedtime about how we go to sleep. We've put in extra nightlights to scare away monsters. We've taken away the extra nightlights because he plays with them. We've taken away every toy he takes to "sleep under his bed." We've pleaded. We've yelled. We've threatened. We've even tried spanking. (Gets us a few more minutes in between, but he still comes back out.)

Nothing is working. We love this kid the rest of the day, but we hate him at bedtime. I just don't understand what's going on. So I have no idea how to fix it.

Smiles

After my little breakdown this morning (why is it the little things that you feel the most?), the boys worked hard to keep me smiling.

Edward, who has had a fever for the last day or so, spent all morning giggling away. I love that boy. Watching him talk animatedly with his toys made me smile. His crazy giggles when he caught my attention made me laugh. And his big "mmmmmAA" when I made a kissy face made me kiss him over and over.

Ethan sat down to show me each and every valentine he received today, and told me all about the cupcake he decorated. I love his excitement. He wrote letters for me on his white board and tried over and over to spell Mom. (He did get Mama.) I love his little furrowed brow. And he climbed up next to me while we played a game. I snuck in some snuggling while he happily beat me.

I really do have the greatest kids. (And they have never done this! Although that would make me laugh too.)

Emotional Day

You know it's going to be an emotional day when finding out that someone has paid the $2 for your son's pizza party at school makes you burst into tears.

:(

No job. Like I told my sister, we had a little pity party and then got over it.

Here's what happened. This company fully intended to hire John. BUT, just last week they received a call from an applicant who had been working for their competition. Apparently she hadn't signed a non-compete agreement, and was very interested in this open position. Unfortunately for us, she is just as qualified as John and has much more relevant experience. Ouch. But we understand.

There is an up-side, though. The woman he met with felt really bad about having to turn John down. And she happens to be a relatively big name in their industry. So she took John out to lunch and talked about how she can help him. He came home with quite a few leads on companies who may be hiring in the near future, names of some other people to talk to, and an invitation to an event with industry executives where she will introduce him around. (He also learned that the salary range for his particular niche of marketing is much higher than we'd thought. Yay for specializing!)

We kind of wish this had been a short story instead of a potential epic. But we know that there is a reason he didn't get this job. We're not giving up.

An extra bonus, John has found some contract work through some old friends. So hopefully we'll have at least a trickle of income soon.

The Scary Part

John decided to publicly break the news about his job last night. I was waiting to see how his interview goes tomorrow. But I told the whole Relief Society while teaching a lesson on Provident Living, so it's not really a big secret. (I've enjoyed your guesses as to what's wrong. Right now, I would rather be pregnant. Scary, right?)

So, John has been unemployed for two weeks. My first reaction was, no biggie. We've done this before. And he already had a jump on things with several interviews already scheduled. (He wanted out.) Then I started to look into it.

In the past, I was working. Not so this time. I immediately applied for every MT job available in the greater Austin area. There were 3. Apparently, even the hospitals and clinics are being hit hard. I'm still waiting to hear something, but I don't have my hopes up.

In the past, we didn't have kids. It's amazing how they add to every single bill. We would probably turn off the heat all together (it doesn't really get cold here) if not for them. We could live completely off of our food storage if they didn't need the whole milk and dairy for growth and neural development. And gas! Just getting Ethan places so that he still feels like life is normal drives up our gas bill.

In the past, we had savings to cover us for several months. This year, we moved, went to disney (which was unpaid time for John), and flew out for two family emergencies. Our savings account is pretty worthless at the moment.

That gets us to the scary part. We've never been in a place where we had no income at all and lots of expenses. Even cutting out nearly everything we can, we run out of money in about a month. I've been quickly learning about all of the government and private aid available. Did you know that the forms to apply for food stamps are horrendous? And that they can make you reapply EVERY MONTH if they want to??? I've discovered that there seem to be an infinite number of Medicaid options. And that the people at WIC are very nice. Biggest of all, I've learned that having zero income actually excludes you from some aid. Weird.

We have started to see little blessings. Like the notification that a medical procedure Edward had done way back in Boston was actually supposed to be covered by insurance. So we'll be able to get our money refunded. And the many people who heard and immediately called to say they had some food they wouldn't be using. (Seriously. We could buy only milk and dairy for at least a month.)

The big thing we're watching out for is lessons. Being in a position where we don't know how we'll keep a roof over our boys heads is opening our eyes. The stress is all encompassing and we feel like we understand the worries of others more. The sudden need to cook and eat as cheaply as possible, and stretch what we have, is forcing me to learn quickly. Overall, it is helping me focus my calling towards the immediate needs in the ward rather than planning for future problems.

(John's biggest lesson so far has been realizing what he's good at.)

So, we're hanging our hopes on a big interview John has tomorrow (tues.) He knows the members of the marketing team there, and (because of a tip from one of them) he was able to sit down with them before the job was even available to discuss what they would be looking for. Essentially, they're looking for John. As long as they don't have a candidate with the same qualifications but more experience, we think they'll have good news for us. We're preparing for the worst, but hoping for the best. Keep us in your prayers!

THWOMP!

It's late. And Edward woke up a few minutes ago. John immediately stuck his finger on his nose and said "Not it!" Man...

Edward was sitting up and crying. While I swept the crib with my hands I asked "Where's your pacifier?" Edward reached behind his leg, grabbed his paci, popped it in his mouth and THWOMP. Out like a light. I nearly burst out laughing.

He didn't need me at all. Except to remind him that all he really needed was his pacifier.

Walking Away

Wow. I don't know what's up with my boys, but they haven't been sleeping. Skipping naps, taking hours to settle down at night, and frequent middle of the night crying has created "The Crankiest Children on the Planet."

It's also created some parents who have a great desire to walk away. Last night, John finally did! After nearly two hours of Ethan coming out of his room, screaming hysterically when taken back in, and waking up his brother every time, John had enough. (I was spending the entire time working on a form for some government assistance. Swearing under my breath at the audacity of the government to create such a horrid form.) So John grabbed the iPod and walked out.

After 45 minutes or so, he walked back in to see Ethan out of his room again. It was actually kind of funny. Ethan knew how mad his dad was, so he just stood there. John knew he would explode if he opened his mouth, so he just stood there. Finally, John turned around and walked out again. When I called him a while later to tell him that Ethan was finally asleep, he was sitting in a movie theater waiting for the show to start. He'd walked all the way to the theater! (He was smart enough to call a friend for a ride home rather than walking in the middle of the night.)

When the kids woke up early this morning, John got up, fed them breakfast, then let them loose at my sleeping form while he showered and practically ran out the door. To sit at Starbucks and work in peace. So I'm left with the fussing, the crying, the whining, the clinging, the yelling, etc. It's only 9 am and I'm ready to be done. Can I walk away please???

Post Script: It's now 3pm and the day hasn't gone so badly. Both boys napped and they managed to play without fighting or whining most of the time. Plus John is on his way home. I guess I can handle sticking around for a while longer.

Currently Stretching

“I believe our spiritual strength is directly related to the extent to which our souls are stretched.”

Elder Alexander B. Morrison

Not Quite as Planned

"Nevertheless the Lord seeth fit to chasten his people; yea, he trieth their patience and their faith. Nevertheless—whosoever putteth his trust in him the same shall be lifted up at the last day. Yea, and thus it was with this people. For behold, I will show unto you that they were brought into bondage, and none could deliver them but the Lord their God, yea, even the God of Abraham and Isaac and of Jacob."

Mosiah 23:21-23

Oddly enough, this is my favorite scripture. The very first phrase is one that's stuck with me for years. "Nevertheless the Lord seeth fit to chasten his people." We get extra trials because we follow Him. Or maybe, He wants to spare us the trials that would come anyway, but he allows them to come our way to strengthen us. To refocus us.

Yup. We're feeling it here at Casa De Boys. Life doesn't turn out rosy all the time. BUT, there are the other two verses. He's asking for our trust. Our faith. Our patience. If we give it, he will deliver us. Oh please, deliver us.

I'm intentionally not explaining because I'm not quite ready yet. We're all healthy. I'll put that out of your minds. This particular trial is one that isn't new to us. But it's so much scarier this time around.

Edward's 12 Month Checkup (at 13 Months)

I finally gave up on the first dr we tried here in TX and tried a new one. He came highly recommended, but we all know I can be a tad picky when it comes to doctors, so I didn't get my hopes up.

He was fabulous! Very knowledgeable AND good with kids. (You'd think most pediatricians would be good with kids, but I've found it to be a very rare thing.) He made Edward happy by climbing up on the exam table with him for the exam, and me happy by being incredibly thorough. Ethan will love the Spiderman pictures covering the walls in his exam room. I think we've found our new pediatrician!

Anyway. Enough about my doctor crush. You probably want to hear about Edward.

No shockers at this routine appointment. His weight gain has slowed down (surprise, surprise) but not drastically. At 22 lbs he's doing just fine. Time to cut out the bottles. He's walking right on schedule. Still sleeps like a champ. Talking WAY more than your average 13 month old. (We think he's up to 25 or 30 understandable words!!) Understands us incredibly well. (When I told him it was time to put his shirt back on, Edward leaned over, grabbed his shirt, and handed it to me.)

And of course, he got four shots. The regular two plus Hep A (required for preschools out here) and the flu shot I'd forgotten earlier. (Good thing the flu is just barely hitting TX. This weekend was the first batch of cases, in fact.)

So nothing surprising. A smart growing boy.

A gratuitous and fuzzy picture of our cute boy.
And yes, he does eat with a fork. Very successfully.

How do you say "Ball"?

If you're Edward, than most balls are "Bah". But not footballs. Footballs are "BAAAAAHHH! BAAAAAHHHH!"

Hee hee. This boy cracks me up.

Movies

John and I love movies. We rarely get to see them in the theaters anymore, but when we do, we try to go see something at an arthouse venue. An independent or international film. They're our favorites. (Plus cheesy sci-fi, of course.)

On friday night, we had family in town and they kicked us out of our house. For the whole night. We had a leisurely dinner with no kids yelling or running around. Then we went to see Slumdog Millionare . This was the best movie we've seen in a while. Afterward, we found the hotel, umm... did some stuff, and then took some Unisom for the best sleep we've had in ages. Thanks Grandma J and Mo!

A conversation I had with my brother on the way to the theater made me want to share some of our favorite movies that you've probably never heard of. In no particular order:

Spring, Summer, Fall, Winter... and Spring - This is our favorite movie. Really. Our absolute favorite. You have to watch it with no distractions. Soak it in. The use of silence is breathtaking. And the scenery... you just have to watch it.

Absolute Giganten - Unfortunately this isn't available in the US. We caught it at Sundance way back when. (If you live in UT and aren't taking advantage of Sundance, you are missing out.) BUT, you can watch the fooseball scene. You'll never see fooseball played like this again.

Quitting - Another Sundance find. This is a true story about a Chinese actor quitting drugs. All of his family, friends, and fellow rehabbers joined in to reenact his recovery. We own this one if you live close enough to borrow it.

He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not - A love story... sort of. I'm not going to say any more than that.

The Emperor's New Clothes - What if Napoleon only faked his death on Elba? And tried to go back and return to power. Serious and funny.

Delicatessen - A dark comedy in a post-apocalyptic world. The entire movie is set within an apartment building that has a delicatessen on the ground floor. We love the Caro/Jeunet directing team and their bizarre ideas. You will either love or hate this movie. We love it.

The City of Lost Children - Another Caro/Jeunet masterpiece, and this time with an actor we love, Ron Perlman. This is even stranger than Delicatessen, so we only recommend it if you're up for something dark and bizarre.

Spirited Away - This is a Hayao Miyazaki. If you don't know his work, you need to. We particularly like this one.

The Station Agent - A beautiful finish for this list. Quiet, powerful, funny, poignant. Peter Dinklage is wonderful. Oh man. I'm moving this the top of our Netflix queue. It's been too long.

Edward at almost 13 months

Edward is such a talker. He babbles nearly all the time. Even with his pacifier hanging out of his mouth. Combined with signs and gestures, he makes himself understood reasonable well. Our current favorite is when he does different voices for different toys. High pitched screechy noises for some, and deeper daddy type voices for other.

The words he says right now (that I can remember) are:
Uh-oh
Whoa
Side (outside)
Uh-sat (what's that)
Mama
Dada
Ama (grandma)
Eeta (Ethan)
Paa (pacifier)
Baa (bottle)
Bah (ball)
Up (cup)
*grunt* (I'm poopy.) This really is a vocalized response when you ask if he needs a diaper change, not just the grunt you thought of.
Moo (cow)
Boo (scaring you)
Rar (lion)

Of course, he still signs eat and all done. And shakes his head no.

He has also learned to beep noses. That's less fun at bedtime when he can reach my nose and beep it from every angle. Mom flinches when you jab the inside of her nose. But it's cute the rest of the day.

Edward's walking has gone from a few steps to a definate goal, to walking just because it's a way to get around. He still doesn't take more than five or six steps before switching to a crawl, but if he's standing, he'll walk a while first. Even switching surfaces easily.

Our little guy is getting bigger by the second. He seems less and less like a baby every day, and more and more like a kid. I love watching this stage!

Mommy Milestone

I got to make my first call to Poison Control today. Yay!

Edward found a cold pack that had fallen out of the freezer. I used to let him gum them on occasion b/c he didn't have teeth and the cold felt good. BAD IDEA. He has a tooth now. When I discovered him, Edward grinned up at me with red gel all over his mouth.

Luckily, they're not toxic. The nice guy at Poison Control was quick to tell me that Edward was fine. Then he said that he may have some minor irritation, but giving him something to drink and cleaning him up would help prevent that. It sounded like they have calls about these cold packs relatively often. Often enough that he didn't need to look up anything.

I expected that the call would be lengthy with lots of questions about how it happened and exactly what brand the unlabeled cold pack was. But it was quick and painless. The only questions they asked were for tracking data - age, sex, and zip code. The whole call was less than a minute.

I'm glad that my first call to them was easy and a non-issue. Because I'll know how helpful they are when one of the boys eats something that's actually poisonous. Rumor has it they'll call 911 for you and stay on the phone until help arrives. To keep answering questions and give first aid instructions. Lets hope I never have to find out!

Dental Adventures, Part 1

Did you know that you don't have to wait until your kids need braces to spend thousands of dollars on their teeth? Ethan is teaching us new things every day!

Ethan had a cleaning today with his new dentist. He was a champ. The boy went in for the cleaning portion ALL BY HIMSELF! This office prefers it that way if the child is ready. I hadn't told about that part because I figured it would freak him out. (It probably would have.) But as soon as the hygenist saw his Cars T-shirt and told him that she had Lightning McQueen toothbrushes, he was off. Mom or no mom. I did poke my head in a few minutes later, but the boy was chatting away. He was just fine.

The x-rays didn't go quite as well, but they got two. That's two more than last time!

After a LONG wait for the dentist, he came in to check Ethan's teeth. As expected, the boy has cavities. Plural. We were very aware of one (that we couldn't get the previous dentist to treat! ARGH!) and expected one or two more. But the boys mouth needs some serious work.

I had to check the treatment work-up to make sure I had my numbers right. Ethan needs five fillings. Bad, but not horrible. He also needs two pulpotomies. To avoid medical jargon, lets think of them as partial root-canals. Yes, I just said root-canals. My four year old will have two crowns. CROWNS.

And how do you do a root canal on a four year old who won't even let you get an x-ray? That's right, sedation. Full-on general anesthesia. At the hospital. In a surgery suite.

I'm kind of freaking out over here. I can handle just about anything in the medical world, but I have this thing about general anesthesia. I'm afraid of it. And I'm really afraid of how Ethan will do coming out of it.

We've told Ethan that the yucky spot on his front tooth needs to be fixed before it hurts. So the dentist will fix it while he's sleeping and he'll wake up with a new tooth. He's actually excited for a new tooth.

We're aiming for the surgery date in mid-February. (The pedi-dentist only books the suite once a month or so.) We have to pre-pay, so we may not make it, but we're hoping.

Anyone else have to put their young kid through general anesthesia? How did it go?

PS - I think I should probably mention that we take very good care of Ethan's teeth. I discussed with the dr why his teeth have so many issues. First, genetics. I have incredibly soft enamel that decays when you look at it funny. Ethan inherited it. Second, spacing. Ethan also has my teeny tiny mouth. I'm missing two full sets of teeth and still barely have room in there. Ethan's teeth are packed so tightly together that brushing is not as effective as it should be. We need to floss morning and night. And third, the gain weight diet. Remember all that whole milk/cream stuff that Ethan used to drink? He had to drink so much of it that he took a cup to bed with him. We knew it risked damaging his teeth, but didn't expect the other problems to compound the issue. We stopped doing that more than a year ago. Plus we have always been cautious about sticky foods and don't allow juice. We've done just about everything right. But what was started before has only gotten worse. At least we have the option of sedation and don't have to traumatize him.

Way Back When... We Went to Florida

With all of the sudden trips last fall, and then the holidays, I never managed to catch up here on the blog. I'm going to attempt some of it.

If you remember, we went to Florida at the beginning of October. After a fun day at the beach with friends, we got down to the real business. Disneyworld. We spent the week with my mom (Grandma L), her husband (Grandpa T), T's oldest daughter's family, and a friend of my mom's from New Zealand. Quite a crowd.

We did it all. Magic Kingdom (the equivalent of Disneyland for you westerners), Epcot, Animal Kingdom, even a water park. (Did you know Disney had waterparks? I did!) Plus, we went to the awesome Halloween party at the Magic Kingdom. Seriously so fun.

I would share horror stories, but there really weren't any. No one was hurt or became violently ill. No one got lost. Even the babies were angels the whole time. We had a great time.

(Our only recommendation when you have a large group of varying ages is to not try to stay together too much. Split up for a few hours and meet back up. There are things to do together, but everyone will have more fun if they have some time when they can go on the rides that THEY want to go on.)

Here are some snapshots from Epcot, and then a character breakfast and the safari at Animal Kingdom.

Us in front of the iconic Spaceship Earth

Ethan was a little bit freaked out by the shark teeth

John and Ethan with Goofy (you can see some of the "cousins" as well)

The whole clan with Mickey

Edward being adorable at breakfast.

The Safari ride at Animal Kingdom is my all time favorite.
You actually go through the habitats, getting amazingly close to the animals.

This rhino was a troublemaker. He has been known ram the jeeps and often stands right in their way. We had to stop and wait for him to move and then he stood about three feet away eyeing us while we inched by. I was so busy holding onto the kids I didn't get any up-close pictures.