I'm at work, by myself in our new room, dubbed by a consultant, the IS SuperStation. The person I work with is on vacation, and though I miss her, I am enjoying my solitude. But she called this afternoon. Gulp. I had this horrible idea that I was going to hear, "I just love Arkansas, and I'm not coming back." Luckily it wasn't that at all. Her aunt, who she is visiting, came down with a truly horrible migraine, and the uncle was taking her to see somebody medical, and said, "Here are some chicken thighs. Make something." Poor kid. Now, while she is bright and resourceful in almost all respects, cooking is something she is coming into slowly, cautiously, and reluctantly. She's a child of the microwave era, I guess, who looks askance at strong or unusual flavors and unfamilar food, a very limited palate and a highly developed "yuck" factor. There she was, looking at a bunch of meat, with no clue what to do or how to start. So she phoned support. I was able to get her started, but the pantry was a little bare, so the recipe is going to be full of compromise. Well, what the heck. It should be fine. If not, she can blame me! My shoulders are broad.

To continue a culinary note, Mark sent me a link about the various uses of Linden trees, including a chocolatey confection made up of the ground seeds, tea and perfume from the flowers, etc. I'm surprised. I had no idea that the fragrant tree I wrote about was so dang versatile!

I, too, am touched by his noodly appendage! Nice. See Mr Random's blog for the entirety. Snicker.

It looks like summer out there! It must be, the cherries are ripe. The birds are taking them, and dropping them around. I had cherry juice on my shoes last night. And I had to change my clothes before work today, because somehow I got splattered with more cherry juice when I took the recycling bin around. I can see them plotting, those birds, grabbing a fruit, swooping, dropping - splatter!! Take that, you cat-loving fiend!

Our Linden tree is blooming. They don't look like much, the flowers, but it has a powerfully sweet scent that seems to come from all over. It's gotten to be a pretty big tree. It was such a baby when Mr Random and I planted it, maybe three or four inches in diameter around the trunk. Now it's got to be around 12" diameter, and 30 or 40 feet high. That brings the years into perspective! Plant a tree, watch it grow... and it does a really fabulous job of shading that side of our house during the summer months. Which are upon us. Ahhh.

I find myself with little to say for myself today. I finished a book, Status Anxiety by Alain de Botton, last night. It was very interesting, a study of how the dynamics of status has changed through the ages, especially focussing on the impact of the industrial revolution, capitalism, and the meritocracy. He uses quotes from philosophers, authors, art and architecture to illustrate the changes in the measurement of status, from the Spartans (warlike-ness, ideally not able to count), to the European peasant (secure position, no mobility, knowing the meek inherit the earth), to the early Christian saints (humbleness & poverty), to aristocratic landowners (birth), to the current industrial superstars (money). Money. Having it gives you status, deserved or not, due to luck or not. Thus part of the anxiety -- the premise is that most people who don't have lots of lucre often feel anxious, depressed, and possibly feel themselves as failures, deficient in some quality necessary for success in the monetary area, regardless of their personal value or talents. The answer? It's a tough one -- want less, is one strategy. Caring less is another. Changing our system is another. Understanding the system is another. Being a bohemian (the last chapter) is another. Anyway, it was an interesting read. I recommend it. It's available at J Michael's, possibly at the library, and if you wait long enough (I've loaned it out already), from me.

And I'll share a joke, courtesy of Mark of Azurefire Blog:

The US Postal Service has created a stamp with a picture of President George W. Bush to honor his first term achievements. In daily use it has been shown that the stamp is not sticking to envelopes. This enraged the President, who demanded a full investigation. After a month of testing, a special presidential commission has made the following findings:

1. The stamp is in perfect order.
2. There is nothing wrong with the applied adhesive.
3. People are spitting on the wrong side.

I believe I blathered on last week about moving, and I know over time I've whined and whimpered about the cross-the-cubers. That's over. I love my new office space. Yesterday, I listened to Mr Random, out loud, right at my desk. How cool is that? Of course, it's a special circumstance, because the person I work with, my roomie, so to speak, is on vacation, so I have beautiful solitude. Of course, there's a downside. I also get all the work and all the calls. But for the moment, it's very nice.

I've been reading the racism & white privilege discussion on thelittlestblog, referred there by Nolan Void. It is good to read, hard reading though. Lots to think about. I thought, after reading the whole thing, that I should leave a comment. I started, faltered, started over, faltered, and finally lost direction and courage, and came back here instead. So now, for a little processing...

I think I am what they refer to as a well-meaning white person (WWP). And WWPs are held in pretty low regard. For good reasons. What it generally means is just that we don't want to be racist. We try not to be. But we may not recognize it when it happens. In many cases, we deny or discount the fact that we have special privileges, and an easier ride. It's often a state of carefulness, awkward and artificial. In the worst case, it's a state of pure denial. In the best, it's good intentions, and a push for understanding, awareness, fairness. Good intentions, but a lack of actual engagement most of the time. But how to be engaged?

The contributors are angry, and rightfully so. And they want something done. Not apologies, not understanding. Something concrete. What that is seems a little nebulous -- after all, what could really make up for a loss of culture, the suffering of ancestors, the continued pall of prejudice? One person mentioned reparations a few times, but though I'm sure money wouldn't hurt, it doesn't seem like it would make any real change to the status quo.

Power. Prosperity. Land. Freedom. Autonomy. Dignity. Respect. Justice. Fairness. It's what we all want. And it's possible. Some of us get more of some/all of that than others. And good intentions all aside, I doubt there are many who have any of the above that want to just give it up, even if it were justified. How to share it better?

So. It was quite a week-end, framed in birthdays. I started with a birthday party Wednesday night -- a lovely party, lovely host and hostess. Happy birthday Tina! The Ovulators looked and sounded absolutely amazing, and I got to see it more than once, since Mr Random took videos.

Then we went camping, over east of Prineville, at Wildcat Camp, for our niece Frankie's big ol' eighth birthday. The country there is really beautiful, studded with these big basalt columns that come out of the hills, hundreds of feet high. The campground is small, off the beaten track, with a nice little creek running through it. The weather? It was damp. It was cold. The ground was hard. But the sun came out, and it did warm up, and I ended up having a good time, hanging around the campfire. I smelled, or maybe reeked is the word I want, of woodsmoke afterwards, but at least I was more or less warm. We only camped really one night, since I'm sort of a camping wimp, and took off after the cake and ice cream for my mom's house. She has a great place, including toilets that flush! After camping, I have a new appreciation for new-fangled luxuries like that.

And roofs. I like roofs. Especially in thunderstorms....

Moved. Things look good! Not all went smoothly, but my part did. I feel bad about the other person... But I'm feeling it -- herking around 17" monitors is not a big picnic. Now, where'd I put my advil???

I just did a survey for a blogging study at MIT. Sort of entertaining to be asked, since I'm doing this as sort of a creative exercise, to entertain myself and Mr Random, and the various friends that I'm always sort of surprised read this sometimes! I think they were looking for my attitude about my blog as as a potential tool for professional development. Not in my case! In fact, I firmly believe, and fondly hope, that few, if any, of my co-workers read this. Now if I were one of you rock starz out there, it could be more useful.

Tomorrow is the big office moving day! I don't know if I'll get set up enough to blog about it, but it should be fun! Fun in one of those alternately boring/chaotic, dirty heavy, exciting/frustrating ways. I can't wait for it to be over. But I hope that they get the heating/cooling system fixed first. We have old steam heat, and something has gone amiss. There are drips in the room I'm moving into, drips in the computer room (yowch!), and an ambient dankness that I'd like to see the end of...

I haven't subjected anyone to garden talk lately. Mr Random had a musical engagement last night, and I was too tired to read, so I drifted outside and sat in the back yard. The feverfew is lovely, little white flowers in big clusters, that glow in dusky twilight. Combined with the silver gray leaves and magenta blooms of the rose campion, it looked beautifully planned and designed. Hah! Double Hah! The best stuff in our back yard are tough, weedy, self-seeding monster plants, that spring up wherever they want, ones that probably any true gardener worth her salt would be battling. I cheer them on, and just try not to mow it or step on them too much. They don't need water, care, or cossetting. Hard to beat, in my book. And I had a couple of cats darting around, attacking grass clods and bugs, so I was quite entertained, no printed matter required.

The City Club was a mix today. It was about the arts, and I'm definitely pro-art. But awards programs, deserving though they undoubtably are, are B-O-R-I-N-G! The second half of the program was interesting. A passionate arts proponent, former teacher, and constant volunteer spoke about arts in the schools, why they should be there, and why they aren't. It seemed to boil down to a lack of being able to quantify the economic benefits of the arts. Her point was that the benefits are intrinsic, not economic, so the system we use to decide their value is flawed. There is a sense that public schools are little economic engines, churning out little cogs who can operate word processors and cash machines, rather than roundly educated beings. And PE gets funding where arts don't probably because it's easier to measure how many kids can do so many laps than it is to judge the value of a poem, painting, or performance. I expect another factor is that school boards, teachers and administrators are afraid -- afraid of the edginess that is in creative expression. Afraid of the parents who will be shocked and appalled at what their children were exposed to -- who cares if it it's in the Louvre? There are violent images, nude images, mythological images... scary! And that's just in traditional visual arts... And if you let those kids start actually creating stuff, who knows what might come out? Double scary to some!

I'm sorting and winnowing my office space. I have so much stuff. I'm cleaning out. But it it difficult to say goodbye to things. Things like an old MS-DOS 4.0, with a cloth-bound manual. I've got scads of 51/4" diskettes. Fastback. ProComm. Old unix manuals. Manuals for 2400 baud modems. 2400 baud modems. 30 or so green-screen terminals. The occasional floppy drive. A parallel-port CD reader. Hoooboy. I remember when they were new, and so cool! In a way, to me, they still have an echo of that original coolness, and it's hard to just pitch them. I give Mr Random a hard time sometimes, but if you have the space, you sure fill it! And when you are going to move, it looms like a big black thundercloud. So pitching is what I'm doing.

On another note, I need to recognize the passing of an old friend. Rest in peace, Paulette. She withdrew from society a few years ago, to the helpless dismay of her friends, so in a way, a lot of the goodbyes have been felt already. But the sense of gone-ness is a reality now. I'm sad, and sort of mad.

But there is nothing I can do about it. So back to sorting. We're wiring the new room tomorrow. Wow. I am so looking forward to a new space, and new energy!

Thanks, Mr Random, for fixing your blog for me. It is ever so much more convenient now! I whined that I had to scroll sideways to get to links, not that I can't scroll, but it's lovely to have it pop up, all ready for clicking!

My mouth is still stinging, in a good way. I had lunch at the Thai restaurant on Oak, can't remember it's name right now, and had a beef salad, nice and crispy veggies, grilled beef, and this spicy/sour dressing. I asked for medium spicy -- I think hot would kill me! It's the combination of puckery sour & hot that's so great... They've made some changes from the last time I was there, and I really do think it's better. My salad came in a big bowl shaped like a cabbage leaf. Very cool. The place was packed, too! I saw my dentist there, Dr. Olga Weinstein, but that's not surprising -- we often eat at the same places. (If you're looking for a good dentist, in a convenient downtown location, follow her link!)

I believe that I will be moving my office to another room fairly soon. I a few weeks anyway. It's going to be a big disruption, and a lot of work, and I absolutely can't wait. Mostly it's the sound environment that will change, and that will be enough to make any amount of work worth it. I feel that if I hear California Dreaming another time (they seem to play it about 5 times a day) I will perhaps screeeeem! Cher doing Half Breed. And about 15 songs of my childhood, over and over and over... Today has been especially bad. I had to leave the room -- Puff the Magic Dragon is more than I can take, sorry PP&M, but I just can't.

Hagrid 

I just heard, Mr Badger/AzureFire has a new feline companion from the Florence Humane Society. His name (per the H.S.) is Hagrid, but that may change as they become more aquainted. I got an e-mail with a picture, and he is terribly cute, a dusky brown/coffee with cream color, a round little face, with one funky ear. He is hiding at the moment, but I hope to see more pictures when he stops being afraid. That is so cool -- I had just read Honey Vizer's blog, asking people to donate to Greenhill, in memory of Birdie, her cat that recently passed out of this phase of existance. And then I got the news of Hagrid's adoption - it just makes me so happy to know that another cat has gotten lucky! I'll add my voice to Honey's and say if you can afford to donate to Greenhill, or your local H.S., do it. They can set it up so that they automatically deduct whatever you want from your account on a regular basis, for instance, they can take $5 or $10 a month, which is fairly easy to deal with, but over the course of the year, it adds into a nice bit of support.

I skipped City Club. Bad, bad. Oh well. It's pretty nice out -- I went to Newmans for Scallops & Chips instead, and had a lovely time. I sometimes really like eating by myself. It was amusing to watch the girl in the window. She was so gruff and rude. I practically expected her to do some sort of "no soup for you" routine. It's amazing what you can get away with. For awhile, anyway...

Have a good week-end everybody!

I want to nap. That's a little awkward at work. Wake up, wake up!

Yesterday at home, we had what I call a "wandering bad feeling." (The phrase comes from a children's story we had when I was small, The Little Brute Family. In that book, it was a wandering good feeling that transformed the Brute family to Nice.) But anyway, yesterday, the wandering bad feeling went from cat to cat, seemingly all day. All manner of irritated sounds, unprovoked attacks, bullying, intimidation, and basic bad behavior. I saw them all do it. Bad astrology for felines, maybe? Today, all was peace and calm. Even some tolerance for each other under close circumstances. Go figure.