Monthly Archives: December 2009

Adios, whatcha-call it decade

Posted by Hollie Wolfe on

New Year’s Eve has come, and with it another decade has passed.  We humans put a lot of emphasis on markers such as years, decades, centuries, but if you really think about it these things mean nothing on a universal scale.  Nothing special happens throughout the universe every December 31.  The stars don’t align perfectly, we don’t experience an intergalactic rift.  All across the universe it is just another day, or whatever measurement people on other planets use.  Yet, here on planet Earth it is a time of celebration, and reflection, a time to evaluate and take inventory of our lives.

A decade is a long time, at least to me.  Maybe I will say different when I have reached 80.  Maybe it feels such a long time  because this was the most significant decade of my life.  This was the decade I came of age, the decade I became a father, the decade that not only changed my life, but also everyone else in the world.

Ten years ago, I had not given thought to being a father or husband, nor to how hard it is to make ends meet, or how important it is to buy your first house.  Ten years ago, all I was concerned with was what the next day would bring.  I was 16,  I had a job at the mall, I was doing well at school, I had a girlfriend that I spent every waking moment with, I had a car that I was paying for, I used the word “I” a lot back then.  I couldn’t wait to go out into the world and change how it was ran.  And if that didn’t work out, at least I would have a chance to be on my own for a while, to experience the walk of life I chose.  Little did I know what that bitch destiny had in store for me.

11 months into the decade I found out I was going to be a father, and that began the wheels of change.  Since then, well lets just say its been a learning experience.  I have had ups and downs, struggles and triumphs.  I did manage to get my high school diploma, and go to what I thought was a legit trade school.  Both of which have got me nowhere.  My marriage has survived a breakup, and several disasters.  Watching my eldest son grow, I now know why people say “you are growing up so fast”.  Watching my youngest grow, I know why they say “the right thing to do isn’t always the easiest thing to do.”  I dedicated 6 years of this decade to a dead-end job, and now feel I have put 3 more into another.  I have given my family somewhat more of a stable environment than what I had, so I got that going my way.

Bottom line, I have made some good calls and some bad calls.  I have also developed the ability to learn from both.  If there is one thing I could tell myself 10 years ago is:  Life isn’t like one of those books where you turn to page 37 if you do this or to page 110 if you do this(when in reality you peak to see what you want).  You are stuck with your choices, and all to often there is no going back.

THIS IS MY WARCRY!!

Posted by Hollie Wolfe on

For the sake of privacy and keeping myself out of trouble (more the second than the first), the party I am addressing will from this point on will be called Mrs. Rottencrotch.

Dear Mrs. Rottencrotch,

When I first saw you I did not know to loathe you. I now know some 2 years later that I dont just loathe you, you are possibly the second most reprehensible person I have crossed paths with.  The first being the low life piece of shit that you somehow sunk low enough to share your pathetic life with for the last 5 years.  No, I am not doing this to make your life as hard as possible (as you have done to my wife, son, and myself for the last 2 years), as much as it is to get the truth out in the open before you trample over it even more.

First lets start with the part I am most familiar with.  The man you have lived with for the last 5 years is an alcoholic, drug addict, child abuser, and child molester.  On top of that he should also be locked up for perjury, because he lied under oath about all of the above.  I know according to him, his family and you, its lies, all lies.  But, it is not a lie.  I can not count the nights that I have had to comfort my wife after she wakes up from a dream where she is trying to run from him.  I was there when she heard that all her sisters had been molested by him.  The tears she cries are the type you cannot make up.  It’s real, and my heart aches every time she cries those tears.

Though, this is not about him, it is about you.  I know more about you than you think I know.  I know you also lied under oath.  You lied after placing your hand on the bible of my faith, and swore on the name of my God that you would tell the truth, and you lied after that.  No, I am not going to tell you what I know, you will find that out soon enough.  You have had 4 children taken away from you in 3 different states, this much you admit to.  You know after the first 2, I would say “maybe its me”, but not you.  You keep on blaming your fuck ups on the government, or the men in your life, or the radiation off of satellites (ok I made that one up, but it would not surprise me).  So you keep on making the same mistakes and precious, innocent lives are forever broken because of you.

Yet, there is hope for one of those lives, isn’t there?  And this is where our paths have crossed.  2 years and 2 months ago I got a call at work informing me that my wife had a little brother, and he needed a family.  Without even blinking an eye I knew I had been told that I was a daddy again.  So we get him, and the laundry list of conditions that you caused.  No, not problems he inherited from you(we’ll get to that in a bit), but that you caused by not taking care of him in the womb.  He was in a hospital bed clinging to life while you and your alcoholic boyfriend went out on the town.  He never knew a mothers touch, never got a hug, had never been tickled until he came to live with us.  This is because of you.  If were stable enough to be a mother, you would have been there for him.  You would have never have put a man before your child.

So we got him, and guess what?  We soon find out has a detachment disorder. WOW, you mean a baby who never had a mother that loved him has problems learning how to love and trust other people?  Of course he does. Two years of  worrying, hard work, and unconditional love (thats the kind of love parents have) have paid off, we are a family and I am his father and he is my son.

Then there was the trial(you know, the one where 12 of your peers decided that you two were not fit to raise a dog much less a child).  You and your significant other hung yourselves on the stand.  Your defense WAS the prosecution.  Let me tell you, you sure chose a winner for a co-defendant.  I mean, who wouldn’t want a guy who has to be dragged into court drunk?  All the time you and he were on the stand, all I heard was anger, never once did I hear a word of remorse or sadness.  I know if one of my boys were taken from me, I would cry everyday until I got them back.  You look at this baby as a piece of property, not a living being.  The only defense you and your live-in could come up with was “He’s ours, he belongs with us”.  Blood doesn’t make a family, Mrs. Rottencrotch, love does.  And, in the Wolfe household there is always plenty of that to go around.

I dont blame you for not loving him, I mean how could a person who was never loved be expected to love another?  And that is where your problems really started wasn’t it, Mrs. Rottencrotch?  You have went from man to man all your life looking for the love you had lacked all your life.  When you couldn’t find that love from a man, you decided that a child might give you that feeling.  Yet, you will never know that feeling because one can not love a person who doesn’t love theirselves.  And, believe me, you have got along way to go before you can do that.  You obviously have some sort of mental illness, Mrs. Rottencrotch, and maybe are mildly retarded.

I know this because MY son has possible disorders, but we are properly handling the medical  procedures.  That brings me to the final point, the entire reason I decided to write this warning.  You have decided to try to make it to where we can not take him to the doctor, by putting him on your own insurance policy, you have caused his Medicaid to be rejected.  That worked for about a day, but we got that straightened out.  You have been reported to your healthcare company for fraud.  Good luck with that.  You see, Medicaid or not, this little boy will get the care that he needs.  I will make sure of it.  I will work 3 jobs, get 5 mortgages on my house (yes, people actually buy houses, not just rent),  and  sell all my earthly possessions before I would let him go with out the things he needs.  This is what a father does, this is what a parent does.

As I hinted earlier this is a warning.  I know you made your little “appeal” in the courts, but let’s get one thing clear.  You are not dealing with a scared little lonely girl, as you and him once thought.  That little girl has grown up to be the best mother I know.  And with her, you get me.  You want a fight, you’ve got one. No one messes with my family.  And MY family does not let anyone mess with the children of this family.  You have no one.  You have brought a knife to a gunfight.  We will not lay down, We will not slowly fade into the night, We will fight you on all fronts.  And we will win  because we have several things that you dont.  Among them are the best interests of this child, and The Truth.

You want a war, GAME ON!

Sincerely,

Hollie Wolfe III

P.S. As you see, I don’t hide behind anonymity.