My Top 30 Films of the 80s

These were incredibly hard to rank, harder than any other decade, because this is the decade that I grew up in and started to mold my mind into what kind of media I’d like for the rest of my life. I saw most of these films before I was 10 years old (yes, I was probably too young for some of them), and they’re imprinted permanently into my brain. It was very hard to keep the list to 30 (not as hard as it was in the upcoming 90s list, but still). So here they are, my top 30 movies of the 80s!

Number 30

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Title: Weird Science
Year: 1985
Plot: Two high-school nerds use a computer program to literally create the perfect woman, who promptly turns their lives upside-down.
Starring: Ilan Mitchell-Smith, Anthony Michael Hall, Kelly LeBrock, Suzanne Snyder, Judie Aronson, Bill Paxton, Robert Downey Jr
Directed by: John Hughes
Based on: The comic book Weird Science #5: Made of the Future by Al Feldstein
Notes: Yes, it’s got some problematic things in it, but this film is so much fun! A classic teen movie (made way before I was a teen) that just makes me laugh. Plus, it’s fun to see Bill Paxton (rip) and Robert Downey Jr in early roles.

Number 29

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Title: The Secret of NIMH
Year: 1982
Plot: To save her ill son, a field mouse must seek the aid of a colony of rats, with whom she has a deeper link than she suspected.
Starring: Elizabeth Hartman, Derek Jacobi, Dom DeLuise, Peter Strauss, Arthur Malet, Hermione Baddeley, Shannen Doherty, Wil Wheaton, John Carradine, Paul Shenar
Directed by: Don Bluth
Based on: The book Mrs Frisby and the Rats of NIMH by Robert C O’Brien
Notes: One of my absolute favourites growing up. I kept on wanting it higher on the list, but there are simply too many amazing movies from this decade! Also, I had no idea that Shannen Doherty (rip) and Wil Wheaton were the voices of two of the Brisby kids!

Number 28

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Title: Ghostbusters
Year: 1984
Plot: Armed with proton packs, four paranormal investigators battle mischievous ghouls in New York.
Starring: Bill Murray, Dan Aykroyd, Harold Ramis, Ernie Hudson, Sigourney Weaver, Annie Potts, Rick Moranis, William Atherton, Slavitza Jovan
Directed by: Ivan Reitman
Based on: An original screenplay written by Dan Aykroyd and Harold Ramis
Notes: What can I say about this film? It’s an absolute classic! It never fails to make me laugh.

Number 27

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Title: Silver Bullet
Year: 1985
Plot: In a small town, brutal killings start to plague the close-knit community. Marty Coslaw, a paraplegic boy, is convinced the murders are the doings of a werewolf.
Starring: Corey Haim, Gary Busey, Everett McGill, Megan Follows, Robin Groves, Leon Russom, Terry O’Quinn, Bill Smitrovich
Directed by: Daniel Attias
Based on: The novella Cycle of the Werewolf by Stephen King
Notes: Corey Haim (rip) was one of the first actors that I remember really having a crush on when I was a kid after seeing him in The Lost Boys and Watchers. He’s much younger in this film, but still adorable. The film itself is fun, and the werewolf effects were pretty good for the time. I miss practical effects…

Number 26

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Title: The Serpent and the Rainbow
Year: 1988
Plot: An anthropologist goes to Haiti to research a drug that makes someone appear dead by suspending all vital signs.
Starring: Bill Pullman, Cathy Tyson, Zakes Mokae, Paul Winfield, Michael Gough, Brent Jennings, Conrad Roberts, Badja Djola
Directed by: Wes Craven
Based on: The non-fiction book The Serpent and the Rainbow by Wade Davis
Notes: The author famously hated the film, and it faced some serious backlash for its fictionalized portrayal of Haitian Vodou and the Haitians in general. But, and I may be wrong here, it’s a fictional movie. It never pretends to be a true story. I loved this film, I thought it was a very neat and different angle to the zombie story.

Number 25

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Title: Warlock
Year: 1989
Plot: A warlock flees from the 17th to the 20th century, with a witch-hunter in hot pursuit.
Starring: Julian Sands, Richard E Grant, Lori Singer, Mary Woronov, Kevin O’Brien
Directed by: Steve Miner
Based on: An original screenplay written by David Twohy
Notes: This film is so good. The film takes its subject matter seriously, even though the premise is kind of silly. Wonderfully campy and acted better than most movies in its genre, it’s definitely a gem of the 80’s. And Julian Sands (rip), my goodness. One of my very first crushes on a grownup. I can still picture tween me watching this with hearts in my eyes, hehe.

Number 24

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Title: Pet Sematary
Year: 1989
Plot: After tragedy strikes, a grieving father discovers an ancient burial ground behind his home with the power to raise the dead.
Starring: Dale Midkiff, Denise Crosby, Fred Gwynne, Brad Greenquist, Miko Hughes, Michael Lombard, Blaze Berdahl
Directed by: Mary Lambert
Based on: The book Pet Sematary by Stephen King
Notes: Pet Sematary is one of my favourite Stephen King books, and this happens to be a great adaptation. Sure, they changed some things, but on the whole, they did an awesome job. It’s sure to give you goosebumps!

Number 23

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Title: Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade
Year: 1989
Plot: In 1938, after his father goes missing while pursuing the Holy Grail, Indiana Jones finds himself up against the Nazis again to stop them from obtaining its powers.
Starring: Harrison Ford, Sean Connery, Alison Doody, Denholm Elliott, John Rhys-Davies, Julian Glover, River Phoenix
Directed by: Steven Spielberg
Based on: An original screenplay written by Jeffrey Boam
Notes: The best of the three Indiana Jones films, this is the only one that I still rewatch from time to time. Fun and sometimes tense, this is a wonderful conclusion to the story. (Yes, I’m fully aware there’s more, I just don’t acknowledge them). The addition of Sean Connery (rip) as Indy’s dad is wonderful. They really seem like a father and son.

Number 22

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Title: Rock & Rule
Year: 1983
Plot: A malevolent rock star kidnaps a singer to force her to participate in the summoning of a demon, and her band must help her stop him.
Starring: Don Francks, Susan Roman, Paul Le Mat, Dan Hennessey, Greg Duffell, Chris Wiggins, Brent Titcomb, Catherine Gallant, Catherine O’Hara
Directed by: Clive A Smith
Based on: Loosely based on the short story The Devil and Daniel Webster by Stephen Vincent Benét
Notes: I don’t remember how I came to see this film. I know we didn’t own the vhs. Maybe taped off of late night tv? In any case, this little, mostly forgotten Canadian film is, in my opinion, the very best in the genre. Forget the much over-rated Heavy Metal, this adult cartoon is where it’s at. Awesome animation, kick ass soundtrack, and great story, this is a must-see for anyone who likes adult animation.

Number 21

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Title: From Beyond
Year: 1986
Plot: A group of scientists have developed the Resonator, a machine which allows whoever is within range to see beyond normal perceptible reality. But when the experiment succeeds, they are immediately attacked by terrible life forms.
Starring: Jeffrey Combs, Barbara Crampton, Ken Foree, Ted Sorel, Carolyn Purdy-Gordon
Directed by: Stuart Gordon
Based on: The short story From Beyond by HP Lovecraft
Notes: I tend to love adaptations of Lovecraft’s works even when they aren’t that good. This one is great, with a wonderful lead performance by Jeffrey Combs (the go-to actor for Lovecraft adaptations). The practical effects are stunning and hold up well, even today.

Number 20

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Title: Beetlejuice
Year: 1988
Plot: The spirits of a deceased couple are harassed by an unbearable family that has moved into their home, and hire a malicious spirit to drive them out.
Starring: Alec Baldwin, Geena Davis, Michael Keaton, Winona Ryder, Catherine O’Hara, Jeffrey Jones, Glenn Shadix
Directed by: Tim Burton
Based on: An original screenplay written by Michael McDowell and Larry Wilson
Notes: Back when Tim Burton was still at the top of his game. So much fun, completely off the wall bonkers, and I love every second of it. It’s wickedly funny with awesome practical effects, it’s been one of my favourites since I was a kid.

Number 19

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Title: Return to Oz
Year: 1985
Plot: Dorothy Gale (who’s somehow much younger now), saved from a psychiatric experiment by a mysterious girl, is somehow called back to Oz when a vain witch and the Nome King destroy everything that makes the magical land beautiful.
Starring: Fairuza Balk, Nicol Williamson, Jean Marsh, Piper Laurie, Sean Barrett, Denise Bryer, Brian Henson, Lyle Conway, Justin Case, John Alexander, Deep Roy, Emma Ridley, Tansy the Dog
Directed by: Walter Murch
Based on: The books Ozma of Oz and The Land of Oz by L Frank Baum
Notes: It’s not often a sequel is better than the first film, but this one definitely is. It’s crazy on so many levels, and shit-your-pants terrifying in others, they simply don’t make them like this anymore. What a shame.

Number 18

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Title: Amadeus
Year: 1984
Plot: The life, music, and death of musical prodigy Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart.
Starring: Tom Hulce, F Murray Abraham, Elizabeth Berridge, Roy Dotrice, Simon Callow, Christine Ebersole, Jeffrey Jones, Charles Kay
Directed by: Milos Forman
Based on: The play Amadeus written by Peter Shaffer, also based on a true story… more or less
Notes: I knew going into it that it wasn’t historically accurate. And do I care? Not a lick. I know a biopic is supposed to tell a true story, and I’m sorry that people might think that this is the way things actually went down, but I’ll be damned if I don’t just love this film to pieces. Fart jokes and all.

Number 17

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Title: Moonstruck
Year: 1987
Plot: Loretta Castorini, a bookkeeper from Brooklyn, finds herself in a difficult situation when she falls for the brother of the man she has agreed to marry.
Starring: Cher, Nicolas Cage, Olympia Dukakis, Vincent Gardenia, Danny Aiello, John Mahoney
Directed by: Norman Jewison
Based on: An original screenplay written by John Patrick Shanley
Notes: I absolutely love this film. Cher is wonderful (and disgustingly beautiful) as Loretta, and her chemistry with Nicolas Cage’s Ronnie is electric. This is one of my very favourite chick flicks.

Number 16

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Title: The Neverending Story
Year: 1984
Plot: Troubled Bastian “borrows” a book from a bookstore and dives into the world of Fantasia where a dark Nothing is destroying everything. The only one who can save the day is young warrior Atreyu.
Starring: Noah Hathaway, Barret Oliver, Alan Oppenheimer, Tami Stronach, Sydney Bromley, Patricia Hayes, Deep Roy, Tilo Prückner, Moses Gunn, Thomas Hill, Gerald McRaney, Alma the Horse
Directed by: Wolfgang Petersen
Based on: The book Die Unendliche Geschichte by Michael Ende
Notes: This was one of my favourites as a kid, and it’s still now. I’m surprised it’s not higher on my list because I literally wore the vhs out, but that just goes to show how awesome 80s films were. Despite some of the acting being rather shaky (especially the Child-like Empress, yikes), this film is simply marvelous. Fantasia is beautiful, most of the practical effects are cool, and while it’s quite different from the book, the story is still amazing, even today. Noah Hathaway as Atreyu was my very first movie crush, and remained so until I passed the character in age, about 7 years later.

Number 15

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Title: Ladyhawke
Year: 1985
Plot: An evil Bishop curses a woman and her lover when she rejects him. With the help of a sly thief, they will travel back to the Bishop and try break the curse.
Starring: Matthew Broderick, Rutger Hauer, Michelle Pfeiffer, Leo McKern, John Wood, Ken Hutchison, Giancarlo Prete, Alfred Molina
Directed by: Richard Donner
Based on: An original screenplay written by Edward Khmara, Michael de Guzman, Tom Mankiewicz, and David Peoples
Notes: Such a beautiful film. Nauseatingly romantic, this film has a bit for everyone. Schmoop, laughter, action, and drama, this is simply a wonderful, wonderful film.

Number 14

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Title: The Great Mouse Detective
Year: 1986
Plot: Detective Basil of Baker Street investigates the kidnapping of a toy maker and uncovers its link to his archenemy, Professor Ratigan.
Starring: Barrie Ingham, Vincent Price, Val Bettin, Susanne Pollatschek, Candy Candido, Alan Young, Diana Chesney
Directed by: Ron Clements, Burny Mattinson, Dave Michener, John Musker
Based on: The book series Basil of Baker Street by Eve Titus
Notes: One of my very favourite Disney films, surpassed only by one, which is later in the list. I absolutely love this little mousey version of Sherlock Holmes, and Vincent Price (rip) as the villain? Of course he is. No one could have done it better.

Number 13

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Title: A Nightmare on Elm Street
Year: 1984
Plot: In the dreams of his victims, a spectral child murderer stalks the children of the members of the lynch mob that killed him.
Starring: Heather Langenkamp, Robert Englund, Johnny Depp, Amanda Wyss, Nick Corri, Charles Fleischer, John Saxon, Ronee Blakley
Directed by: Wes Craven
Based on: An original screenplay written by Wes Craven, although he was heavily inspired by real-life news reports of refugees dying in their sleep from extreme nightmares, often referred to as Sudden Unexpected Nocturnal Death Syndrome.
Notes: This was the very first horror movie I ever saw, which means I was just a wee thing (only 3 or 4 years old) when I partially saw it from where I was hiding while my cousins, who thought I was in bed, were watching. And it’s stuck with me ever since, still one of my favourites, even with the sometimes laughable acting and effects. When a movie is this good, lots of stuff can be over-looked!

Number 12

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Title: Poltergeist
Year: 1982
Plot: A young family are visited by ghosts in their home. At first the ghosts appear friendly, moving objects around the house to the amusement of everyone, then they turn nasty and start to terrorize the family before they kidnap the youngest daughter.
Starring: Craig T Nelson, JoBeth Williams, Beatrice Straight, Heather O’Rourke, Dominique Dunne, Oliver Robins, Martin Casella, Zelda Rubinstein
Directed by: Tobe Hooper
Based on: An original screenplay written by Steven Spielberg, Michael Grais, and Mark Victor, although they were heavily inspired by the supposed true haunting of the Hermann family in Long Island, in 1958.
Notes: An absolute classic of the genre, it’s still one of the very best haunted house films ever made, even 44 years later. Also, I hate clowns, even toy ones *shudder*

Number 11

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Title: The Princess Bride
Year: 1987
Plot: While home sick in bed, a young boy’s grandfather reads him a story called The Princess Bride, about a young woman, believing her true love to be dead, who settles with marrying a wicked prince. When her love turns out to be alive, he sets about rescuing her from the prince’s clutches.
Starring: Cary Elwes, Mandy Patinkin, Robin Wright, Chris Sarandon, André the Giant, Christopher Guest, Wallace Shawn, Peter Falk, Fred Savage, Peter Cook, Mel Smith, Billy Crystal, Carol Kane
Directed by: Rob Reiner
Based on: The book The Princess Bride by William Goldman
Notes: This film is both schmoopy and full of adventures, perfect for kids and adults alike. And one more thing: Hello, my name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.

Number 10

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Title: The Goonies
Year: 1985
Plot: After finding out that his family will loose their home to an unscrupulous developer who’s buying up the neighbourhood to tear everything down and build a golf course, a teen and his friends make a pact to find a hidden treasure of legend in a local cave.
Starring: Sean Astin, Josh Brolin, Corey Feldman, Jeff Cohen, Kerri Green, Martha Plimpton, Ke Huy Quan, John Matuszak, Robert Davi, Joe Pantoliano, Anne Ramsey
Directed by: Richard Donner
Based on: An original screenplay written by Chris Columbus, based on a story by Steven Spielberg
Notes: I can’t count the number of times I watched this as a kid. It’s so much fun with lots to appeal to both kids and adults. Adventure, danger, traps, and even a little romance.

Number 9

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Title: Near Dark
Year: 1987
Plot: After being bit by a beautiful vampire, a young man is given an ultimatum by her family: make a kill within a week, or die. When he realizes he can’t kill, he and the girl run off, with her family in hot pursuit.
Starring: Adrian Pasdar, Jenny Wright, Lance Henriksen, Bill Paxton, Jenette Goldstein, Joshua John Miller, Tom Thomerson
Directed by: Kathryn Bigelow
Based on: An original screenplay written by Kathryn Bigelow and Eric Red
Notes: The other vampire film that came out in 1987, this one is decidedly more adult, and was criminally overlooked. I saw this for the first time as a teenager, and it had everything a teenage girl could possibly want. Romance, eye candy, and lots and lots of blood. Oh yeah!

Number 8

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Title: Willow
Year: 1988
Plot: A reluctant dwarf must play a critical role in protecting a special baby from an evil queen.
Starring: Warwick Davis, Val Kilmer, Joanne Whalley, Jean Marsh, Patricia Hayes, Billy Barty, Kevin Pollak, Rick Overton, Pat Roach, Gavan O’Herlihy, David Steinberg, Phil Fondacaro
Directed by: Ron Howard
Based on: An original screenplay by Bob Dolman, based on a story by George Lucas
Notes: Such a wonderful, beautiful story. Good acting and surprisingly good effects for its time, it still holds up very well today. Plus, Val Kilmer (rip) is smokin’ hot as Madmartigan, who was one of my very first adult crushes.

Number 7

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Title: Aliens
Year: 1986
Plot: Decades after surviving the Nostromo incident, Ellen Ripley is sent out to re-establish contact with a terraforming colony but finds herself battling the Alien Queen and her offspring.
Starring: Sigourney Weaver, Michael Biehn, Carrie Henn, Lance Henriksen, Bill Paxton, Paul Reiser, Jenette Goldstein, William Hope, Al Matthews
Directed by: James Cameron
Based on: An original screenplay written by James Cameron, although he acknowledged inspiration from Robert A Heinlein’s novel Starship Troopers
Notes: Simply the best space/alien movie ever, full stop. I saw this (probably way too young) on tv when I was about 8 or 9 and have loved it since then. Action packed and tense, with killer effects, this film rocks!

Number 6

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Title: The Black Cauldron
Year: 1985
Plot: A young boy and a group of misfit friends embark on a quest to find a dark magic item of ultimate power before a diabolical tyrant can.
Starring: Grant Bardsley, Susan Sheridan, Freddie Jones, Nigel Hawthorne, John Byner, Arthur Malet, Phil Fondacaro, John Hurt
Directed by: Ted Berman, Richard Rich
Based on: The first two books in The Chronicles of Prydain series by Lloyd Alexander, titled The Book of Three and The Black Cauldron
Notes: This is my favourite Disney movie, and probably their darkest. It didn’t do well upon release, so that put an end to “dark Disney”, which was a real shame for weirdo kids like me.

Number 5

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Title: The Dark Crystal
Year: 1982
Plot: On another planet in the distant past, a Gelfling embarks on a quest to find the missing shard of a magical crystal, and so restore order to his world.
Starring: Stephen Garlick, Lisa Maxwell, Percy Edwards, Billie Whitelaw, Barry Dennen, Jerry Nelson, Joseph O’Conor
Directed by: Jim Henson, Frank Oz
Based on: An original screenplay written by David Odell, based on a story created by Jim Henson and Frank Oz
Notes: So many of the films I loved as a child are like this one, “too weird and scary” for today’s wimpy children. I’m not sure what the people who made children’s movies were on in the 80s, but I want some. This film is both heartwarming and tense, with simply stunning puppetry and locations.

Number 4

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Title: Fright Night
Year: 1985
Plot: A teen becomes suspicious of his new neighbour when bodies of young women are found dumped in trash bags. He soon realizes the suave, handsome man is an evil vampire, and he tries to enlist the help of a tv vampire slayer to stop him.
Starring: Chris Sarandon, William Ragsdale, Amanda Bearse, Roddy McDowall, Stephen Geoffreys, Jonathan Stark, Dorothy Fielding, Art Evans
Directed by: Tom Holland
Based on: An original screenplay written by Tom Holland
Notes: One of the original great horror-comedies, this film is fun, campy, and scary. The actors are perfect in their roles, especially Chris Sarandon as the evil yet seductive Jerry Dandridge. The remake, while nowhere near as good as this one, is still worth a gander.

Number 3

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Title: Legend
Year: 1985
Plot: A young man must stop the Lord of Darkness from both destroying daylight and marrying the woman he loves.
Starring: Tom Cruise, Mia Sara, Tim Curry, David Bennent, Annabelle Lanyon, Alice Playten, Billy Barty, Cork Hubbert, Robert Picardo
Directed by: Ridley Scott
Based on: An original screenplay written by William Hjortsberg, although he was heavily inspired by classic fairy tales and Celtic art, particularly the book Faeries by Brian Froud and Alan Lee.
Notes: I’m not sure if the creators of this film intended it to be a kids film or an adults, but I know I saw it as a kid (of course I did). This film, effects-wise, was so far ahead of its time that it would be impressive even if it came out today. And Tim Curry is deliciously evil as Darkness (although I heard that he hated the makeup process, those horns weighed a ton!)

Number 2

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Title: Labyrinth
Year: 1986
Plot: Fifteen-year-old Sarah accidentally wishes her baby half-brother, Toby, away to the Goblin King Jareth, who will keep him if Sarah does not complete his Labyrinth in thirteen hours.
Starring: Jennifer Connelly, David Bowie, Brian Henson, Ron Mueck, Dave Goelz, David Shaughnessy, Michael Hordern, Denise Bryer, David Healy, Robert Beatty, Toby Froud
Directed by: Jim Henson
Based on: An original screenplay written by Terry Jones, based on a story by Jim Henson and Brian Froud, although they acknowledged they were heavily inspired by Outside Over There by Maurice Sendak
Notes: If I had to absolutely choose a favourite fantasy film of all time, this would be it. I saw it at 5 years old, when it came out, and I’ve seen it well over 100 times. I learned all the words, songs and talked, in a very short time, and I still know most of them now. It’s an absolutely perfect piece of film. And David Bowie (rip) is so beautiful in this, I can’t help but swoon every time. They just don’t make them like this anymore. What a pity…

Number 1

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Title: The Lost Boys
Year: 1987
Plot: When brothers Sam and Michael move to a new town after their parents’ divorce, they quickly realize that the town is over-run by vampires. Sam gets help from self-appointed vampire slayers, but for Michael it may be too late…
Starring: Jason Patric, Corey Haim, Keifer Sutherland, Jami Gertz, Corey Feldman, Dianne Wiest, Barnard Hughes, Edward Herrmann, Jamison Newlander, Alex Winter, Billy Wirth, Brooke McCarter, Chance Michael Corbitt, Folsom the Dog, Cody the Dog
Directed by: Joel Schumacher
Based on: An original screenplay written by Janice Fischer and James Jeremias
Notes: It was the first vampire movie I ever saw, and was the beginning of a life-long love affair with all things that go bump in the night. I was 6 when this came out, and my mom bought it on vhs and hid it from me, saying it was “too scary”. By the time she’d caught me with it, I’d already watched it about 20 times. Not too scary for this weirdo!

And there it is, 30 of the best films from the 80s. I had a hell of time choosing between Labyrinth and The Lost Boys as my number 1, I think I love them both equally. And I do think the ranking is pretty fluid here. A lot of these can be interchangeable, depending on my mood.

Shout-outs go to the following films for almost making the list:

Watchers
Re-animator
Cellar Dweller
Just One of the Guys
Pretty in Pink
The Breakfast Club
Who Framed Roger Rabbit?
Twice Upon a Time
Stand By Me
Firestarter

Some of these were so close to making the list that it hurt to leave them off, but adding them would just make an already long list even longer, so here they are.

Stay tuned for the 90s, coming soon!

M.

Mel’s 5 Second Review: The Night House

The Night House (2020)
Rebecca Hall, Sarah Goldberg, Vondie Curtis-Hall, Evan Jonigkeit, Stacy Martin
Directed by: David Bruckner

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This movie has been on my Disney+ watchlist since it arrived on the platform. I’ve been really wanting to see it but never seemed to get around to it. I finally did and, well, I’m not sure how I feel about it.

A recently widowed woman comes to think her house is haunted, but is it really her husband?

I didn’t dislike the movie, let’s get that out of the way. I liked it, I think. It was definitely more of a slow burn, but not in a bad way, I was never bored. But I don’t know, there was just something that felt a little off. I think it might have a lot to do with Rebecca Hall’s performance. While not bad, the character just seemed.. off? I’m not sure if that was intentional, or if it’s just something that I imagined, but I didn’t care a whole lot about her because of it.

SPOILERS INCOMING

Although, to be fair, I don’t know how I would react if first, my husband commits suicide seemingly out of the blue and second, has some pretty awful secrets. So maybe she’s not acting weird at all. I did enjoy the end. I’ve seen some others say that it was lacking, but I thought it fit the tone of the rest of the film. There’s a nice sense of dread that permeates the entire film, which is nice. Also, how cute is Evan Jonigkeit as the husband? My goodness. He’s got odd features, but they work.

So, do I recommend it? I do, if slow burn ghost stories are your bag. It gets a pretty good 7.5/10 from me.

M.

Mel’s 5 Second Review: Perewangan

Perewangan (2024)
Davina Karamoy, Beby Evelyn, Ully Triani, Shanty, Septian Dwi Cahyo, Syifa Aulia, Randy Nidji
Directed by: Awi Suryadi

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I watched this off my Shudder watchlist last night. I enjoy demon-y type movies, so I figured I’d give this little Indonesian film a chance. And it was… fine.

After a woman is seemingly possessed, the shock sends her husband to a psychiatric hospital. But the real terror waits for her children after the father comes home.

I’m not even sure I have enough to say about this for a full blog post, but I’ll try. It was an altogether average film. The acting was fine. The story was fine, if a little uninspired. The camerawork was fine, although it did get a little annoying with the weird angles sometimes. The demon looked ok, but again, uninspired. One thing I really didn’t like, though, was their over-reliance of cgi. There were hardly any makeup effects, it was all cg. It takes away from a film, I find, if over-used. The one big makeup they had was some shots of the demon itself, and honestly, it looked a little silly. The film was also over-long, clocking in at 1 hour 49 minutes. 20 minutes could have easily been shaved off this thing.

I didn’t know anything about this demon, the Perewangan, because it’s from Javanese folklore. The word means “helper” and is basically a demon you summon to grant you what you want, but it must be fed. And if you don’t, you’re cursed and possessed. It’s multigenerational as well, so even if you kill yourself or something, that won’t stop it. It’s a pretty common myth, they have something like that from many cultures around the world, but they could have done something more interesting with the concept, I’m sure. And the ending is, in a word, typical.

So do I recommend it? Meh, not really. There’s not much to recommend. It gets a fine 5/10 from me.

M.

This is currently streaming on Shudder.

Mel’s 5 Second Review: Witchboard

Witchboard (1986)
Todd Allen, Tawny Kitaen, Stephen Nichols, Kathleen Wilhoite, Burke Byrnes, James W Quinn, JP Luebsen
Directed by: Kevin Tenney

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I was in the mood for a fun, cheesy horror movie last night, and noticed this was on Shudder, so I put it on. And while it lacked a bit of that 80’s charm, it was still pretty good.

When a woman becomes terrorized by a spirit after using a Ouija board by herself, her fiancé and her ex, who used to be his best friend, must join forces to find out how to save her.

This is one of the few “bigger” horror B movies from the 80’s that I hadn’t seen yet. After hearing about it from Daniel over at The Cobwebs Channel, I decided to take the plunge. It was lacking a bit on the fun and even the cheese. It takes itself pretty seriously (except maybe with the character of Zarabeth) and therefor lacked a bit. But what I did get was a pretty good haunting/possession film (not good enough to edge out any of the top 15 I did, hehe). Tawny Kitaen, otherwise known as a “Video Vixen“, was surprisingly good in the role of the terrorized woman, and although she’s drop dead gorgeous, her hair… oh my god. It’s SOO fried, like too much bleach and teasing fried. I know it was the 80’s, but damn! Use some conditioner! Her fiancé was played well by Todd Allen. The character is aloof and a bit of an asshole but still you’re rooting for him. And the ex best friend, whoa those eyeballs! So green! There weren’t a lot of effects, just one decapitation that looks a little funny. And what little makeup effects we got were done well. All in all, it’s a good time.

Do I recommend it? Sure, if you enjoy 80’s films. If you don’t, I’d advise against it. I give it a good 7.5/10.

M.

This film is currently streaming on Shudder.

My Top 15 Possession Films

Supernatural horror is my favourite category of horror films (and books for that matter), and in that subgenre, possession films (and books) are my favourites. I’ve seen and read so many that they tend to blur together, but a few of them really stand out. Here are my top 15 possession films. You’ll notice, when called for, I put “true story” in quotations. I definitely don’t believe any of this stuff happened for real, with the exception of two court cases for numbers 7 and 2. But everything surrounding them, that’s a big no. Enjoy!

Number 15

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Title: Prey for the Devil
Year: 2022
Starring: Jacqueline Byers, Christian Navarro, Posy Taylor, Colin Salmon, Nicholas Ralph, Virginia Madsen, Ben Cross, Debora Zhecheva
Directed by: Daniel Stamm
Plot: A nun prepares to perform an exorcism and comes face to face with a demonic force with mysterious ties to her past.
Why I love it: This is the film that I’ve seen most recently, and I have to say, I was quite impressed. It didn’t reinvent the wheel or anything, but it was a good time.

Number 14

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Title: Late Night with the Devil
Year: 2023
Starring: David Dastmalchian, Laura Gordon, Ingrid Torelli, Ian Bliss, Fayssal Bazzi, Rhys Auteri, Georgina Haig, Josh Quong Tart
Directed by: Cameron Cairnes, Colin Cairnes
Plot: A late night tv host in 1977, in an effort to save his dying show, has on a girl who is supposedly possessed in a live broadcast that goes horribly wrong.
Why I love it: This was quite a unique film, and they did an amazing job recreating the vibe of a cheesy 70’s talk show. It might have been higher on my list, but I wasn’t a big fan of the ending.

Number 13

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Title: The Possession of Michael King
Year: 2014
Starring: Shane Johnson, Ella Anderson, Cara Pifko, Julie McNiven, Tomas Arana, Patricia Healy, Cullen Douglas, Jed Rees, Dale Dickey
Directed by: David Jung
Plot: Michael is an atheist who recently lost his wife in an unfortunate accident. After confronting his late wife’s “spiritual adviser” (a tarot card reader), he decides to make a documentary featuring what he believes will be proof that the supernatural doesn’t exist.
Why I love it: This little film is so much better than it had any right being. As someone who hates found footage, I found this film so good that I was able to look past it.

Number 12

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Title: Evil Dead
Year: 2013
Starring: Jane Levy, Shiloh Fernandez, Jessica Lucas, Lou Taylor Pucci, Elizabeth Blackmore, Inca the Dog
Directed by: Fede Alvarez
Plot: Five friends head to a remote cabin to help one of them kick a drug habit, where the discovery of a Book of the Dead leads them to unwittingly summon up demons living in the nearby woods.
Why I love it: I hated the original, but this remake/sequel is pretty awesome. So much more gory than I usually like my films, but it was very well done, so I was able to enjoy it despite that.

Number 11

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Title: The Blackcoat’s Daughter
Year: 2015
Starring: Kiernan Shipka, Lucy Boynton, Emma Roberts, James Remar, Lauren Holly, Greg Ellwand
Directed by: Osgood Perkins
Plot: During winter break, two students stay in an all-girls boarding school in the company of a terrifying presence.
Why I love it: Wonderful, quiet, and weird. I loved it. What a gut-punch of an ending.

Number 10

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Title: The Vatican Tapes
Year: 2015
Starring: Olivia Taylor Dudley, Michael Peña, Dougray Scott, John Patrick Amedori, Peter Andersson, Djimon Hounsou, Kathleen Robertson
Directed by: Mark Neveldine
Plot: A priest and two Vatican exorcists must do battle with an ancient satanic force to save the soul of a young woman.
Why I love it: I really wasn’t expecting much when I picked this up in a Walmart bargain bin. Imagine my surprise when I actually loved it! Just a fun, good time.

Number 9

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Title: Ouija: Origin of Evil
Year: 2016
Starring: Elizabeth Reaser, Lulu Wilson, Annalise Basso, Henry Thomas, Parker Mack, Halle Charlton, Kate Siegel, Doug Jones
Directed by: Mike Flanagan
Plot: In 1967 Los Angeles, a girl tries to communicate with her late father through a Ouija board, but unleashes a demon instead.
Why I love it: I had no intention of watching it, since the first one was awful. But the trailer intrigued me enough that I gave it a chance. And I’m glad I did. Mike Flanagan can really do no wrong.

Number 8

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Title: Fallen
Year: 1998
Starring: Denzel Washington, John Goodman, Donald Sutherland, Embeth Davidtz, James Gandolfini, Elias Koteas, Gabriel Casseus, Robert Joy
Directed by: Gregory Hoblit
Plot: Homicide detective John Hobbes witnesses the execution of serial killer Edgar Reese. Soon after the execution, the killings start again, and they are very similar to Reese’s style. He is then taunted by an entity that can jump from body to body.
Why I love it: This is such an under-rated gem, I rarely hear people talking about it, which is a real shame. It’s a great story with a stacked cast. It’s not a conventional possession movie, but still fits the category.

Number 7

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Title: The Conjuring: The Devil Made Me Do It
Year: 2021
Starring: Patrick Wilson, Vera Farmiga, Ruairi O’Connor, Sarah Catherine Hook, Julian Hilliard, John Noble, Eugenie Bondurant, Shannon Kook, Steve Coulter
Directed by: Michael Chaves
Plot: Arne Cheyenne Johnson stabs and murders his landlord, claiming to be under demonic possession while Ed and Lorraine Warren investigate the case and try to prove his innocence.
Why I love it: I may be in the minority here, but this is my second favourite Conjuring movie. I just love the characters so much (as long as I separate them from their real-life counterparts), and I love spending time with them. Based on a “true story”, based on The Devil in Connecticut by Gerald Brittle.

Number 6

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Title: The Exorcist
Year: 1973
Starring: Ellen Burstyn, Linda Blair, Jason Miller, Max von Sydow, Lee J Cobb, Kitty Winn, Jack MacGowran, William O’Malley
Directed by: William Friedkin
Plot: When a mysterious entity possesses a young girl, her mother seeks the help of two Catholic priests to save her life.
Why I love it: I mean, it’s the OG, how could I not love it? I feel like I should apologize for not having it higher, but my top 5 are really, really good, hehe. A wonderful case study in faith and despair. Based on The Exorcist by William Peter Blatty.

Number 5

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Title: Stigmata
Year: 1999
Starring: Patricia Arquette, Gabriel Byrne, Jonathan Pryce, Nia Long, Thomas Kopache, Enrico Colantoni, Rade Serbedzija, Dick Latessa
Directed by: Rupert Wainwright
Plot: When a young woman becomes afflicted by stigmata, a priest is sent to investigate her case, which may have severe ramifications for his faith and for the Catholic church itself.
Why I love it: My lifelong crush on Gabriel Byrne aside, this is just an awesome movie. I must have seen it over 20 times!

Number 4

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Title: The Exorcist III
Year: 1990
Starring: George C Scott, Ed Flanders, Brad Dourif, Jason Miller, Nicol Williamson, Scott Wilson, Nancy Fish
Directed by: William Peter Blatty
Plot: A police lieutenant uncovers more than he bargained for as his investigation of a series of murders, which have all the hallmarks of the deceased Gemini serial killer, leads him to question the patients of a psychiatric ward.
Why I love it: It may upset some people that this one is higher than the first one, but I simply like this one more. George C Scott was born to play this role, and Brad Dourif is absolutely electric as the Gemini killer. And it has the best jump scare in movie history, full stop. Based on Legion by William Peter Blatty.

Number 3

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Title: Deliver Us From Evil
Year: 2014
Starring: Eric Bana, Edgar Ramírez, Joel McHale, Olivia Munn, Sean Harris, Chris Coy, Lulu Wilson, Olivia Horton, Dorian Missick, Mike Houston
Directed by: Scott Derrickson
Plot: A detective and a priest join forces to stop an ancient evil that is spreading across New York.
Why I love it: As soon as I saw it was directed by Scott Derrickson, I knew I would love it. It’s got great characters, good mystery, some tense scenes, and a killer exorcism. What else could you want? Based on a “true story”, based on Beware the Night by Ralph Sarchie.

Number 2

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Title: The Exorcism of Emily Rose
Year: 2005
Starring: Laura Linney, Tom Wilkinson, Jennifer Carpenter, Campbell Scott, Colm Feore, Shohreh Aghdashloo, Joshua Close, JR Bourne, Mary Beth Hurt
Directed by: Scott Derrickson
Plot: A lawyer takes on a negligent homicide case involving a priest who performed an exorcism on a young girl.
Why I love it: Scott Derrickson again, I know. I didn’t plan it like this, I swear! This film is at times poignant, at times tense, and at times downright scary. Based on a “true story”, based on The Exorcism of Anneliese Michel by Dr Felicitas Goodman.

Number 1

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Title: The Conjuring
Year: 2013
Starring: Patrick Wilson, Vera Farmiga, Lili Taylor, Ron Livingston, Joey King, Shanley Caswell, Shannon Kook, John Brotherton, Hayley McFarland, Mackenzie Foy, Kyla Deaver, Sterling Jerins, Joseph Bishara
Directed by: James Wan
Plot: Paranormal investigators Ed and Lorraine Warren work to help a family terrorized by a dark presence in their farmhouse.
Why I love it: This is my comfort movie. When I don’t feel well, if I’m in the hospital, or if I simply don’t know what to do with myself, I’ll throw this film on and I’ll immediately feel better. Based on a “true story”, based on House of Darkness House of Light by Andrea Perron.

Mel’s 5 Second Review: Weapons

Weapons (2025)
Julia Garner, Josh Brolin, Alden Ehrenreich, Benedict Wong, Amy Madigan, Cary Christopher, Austin Abrams, Scarlett Sher (v.o.)
Directed by: Zach Cregger

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This film was on a lot of people’s Best Of lists for 2025. And I gotta say, I don’t understand the hype.

When all the children save one in a teacher’s classrom leave their houses in the middle of the night and vanishes, a small town is thrust into a mystery where anyone and every one are suspects.

So this is a film by Zach Cregger. Had I known that going in, maybe my expectations would have been more tempered. I didn’t hate Barbarian, but I didn’t love it either. I have to say, I enjoyed the first act. The mystery, the suspense, it was all great. The characters are imperfect, just like real life. But then the second act, where we find out what’s actually going on (which I won’t spoil in case anyone still has yet to see it and wants to), I was left very cold. I was like “Oh, It’s (redacted). Is that it?” And then the third act, holy shit. It was so silly, so over the top. People in the cinema with me were laughing out loud, and so was I, but not in a good way. Had it have been comedic all the way through, then maybe it wouldn’t have been so jarring.

But, I have to give credit where credit is due. The film looked beautiful. There were a few creepy moments. And all the acting was superb, and I’m not mad that Amy Madigan got an Oscar nod. Actually, horror is doing well at the Oscars this year, and I’m here for it. Now to see if they actually win any… But I digress. I just feel like Cregger picked the low hanging fruit as his reveal. I’m not saying I could have written it better, but he should have.

Now for the hard part. Do I recommend it? No… and yes. Knowing how many people adored this thing, I would say “I didn’t care for it, but so many others loved it, so give it a shot.” As for me, I give this a 5/10.

M.

Ranking Stephen King Adaptations (that I’ve seen)

It’s no secret that I love Stephen King books. I’ve read a good number of them and I don’t think I’ve ever been disappointed. The adaptations, however… not always so much. I’ve seen 38 of them so here’s my ranking from worst to best. There won’t be any derivative works, nothing not directly based on the books. So no Pet Sematary 2, no Return to Salem’s Lot, etc. Enjoy!

NUMBER 38

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Title:  The Lawnmower Man
Directed by:
Brett Leonard
Year:
1992
Starring:
Jeff Fahey, Pierce Brosnan, Jenny Wright, Mark Bringelson, Geoffrey Lewis, Jeremy Slate, Austin O’Brien
Notes: I can’t express just how bad this film is. Worst part is, there’s actors in this that can actually act, not that you can tell by watching this turd.

NUMBER 37

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Title: Salem’s Lot
Directed by:
Gary Dauberman
Year:
2024
Starring:
Lewis Pullman, Makenzie Leigh, Jordan Preston Carter, Alfre Woodard, Bill Camp, John Benjamin Hickey, Nicholas Crovetti, Spencer Treat Clark, Alexander Ward
Notes:
I was very much looking forward to this film. Then I watched it and… holy crap is this a piece of shit. It insulted my intelligence.

NUMBER 36

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Title: Needful Things
Directed by:
Fraser C Heston
Year:
1993
Starring:
Max von Sydow, Ed Harris, Bonnie Bedelia, Amanda Plummer, JT Walsh, Ray McKinnon, Duncan Fraser, Valri Bromfield
Notes:
I honestly don’t remember much about this one because I saw it when it first played on tv in 1993 (I was 12). But what I do remember is that it sucked. Stick to the book. It was great.

NUMBER 35

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Title: The Night Flier
Directed by:
Mark Pavia
Year:
1997
Starring:
Miguel Ferrer, Julie Entwisle, Dan Monahan, Michael H Moss, John Bennes, Beverly Skinner
Notes: Another one that I don’t remember much about except for the fact that I hated it. But I’ve recently heard a few YouTubers saying that it’s worth another viewing. Maybe I will.

NUMBER 34

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Title: In the Tall Grass
Directed by:
Vincenzo Natali
Year: 2019
Starring:
Laysla De Oliveira, Avery Whitted, Patrick Wilson, Will Buie Jr, Harrison Sloan Gilbertson, Rachel Wilson
Notes: I haven’t read the book, which King co-authored with his son, Joe Hill. It has to be better than this drivel. It has to be.

NUMBER 33

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Title: The Shining
Directed by:
Stanley Kubrick
Year:
1980
Starring:
Jack Nicholson, Shelley Duvall, Danny Lloyd, Scatman Crothers, Barry Nelson, Philip Stone
Notes:
I know many, many people are going to disagree with me here, but I absolutely hated this film. The acting is laughable, even by 80’s standards. But I can stand strong in my opinion knowing that King himself hated it.

NUMBER 32

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Title: Thinner
Directed by:
Tom Holland
Year:
1996
Starring:
Robert John Burke, Joe Mantegna, Lucinda Jenney, Bethany Joy Lenz, Michael Constantine, Terence Kava, Kari Wuhrer
Notes:
Another one I don’t remember much. What I do remember is feeling really bored.

NUMBER 31

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Title: Cujo
Directed by:
Lewis Teague
Year:
1983
Starring:
Dee Wallace, Danny Pintauro, Daniel Hugh Kelly, Christopher Stone, Ed Lauter, Moe and Cubby the dogs
Notes: The performances in the film are great. But holy boring. The book can tell you what’s going on in Donna’s head, so it’s very good. But the film can’t do that (unless they add cheesy narration), so it just ends up being mostly dull.

NUMBER 30

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Title: Salem’s Lot
Directed by:
Tobe Hooper
Year:
1979
Starring:
David Soul, James Mason, Lance Kerwin, Bonnie Bedelia, Lew Ayres, Julie Cobb, Elisha Cook Jr, George Dzundza
Notes:
I really don’t get all the hype around this movie. It was sooooo boring…

NUMBER 29

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Title: Christine
Directed by:
John Carpenter
Year:
1983
Starring:
Keith Gordon, John Stockwell, Alexandra Paul, Robert Prosky, Harry Dean Stanton, Christine Belford, Roberts Blossom
Notes:
I just found the acting in this to be terrible, especially the lead. Ho-boy….

NUMBER 28

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Title: Dreamcatcher
Directed by:
Lawrence Kasdan
Year:
2003
Starring:
Damian Lewis, Jason Lee, Thomas Jane, Timothy Olyphant, Morgan Freeman, Tom Sizemore, Donnie Wahlberg
Notes:
This was already a silly concept as a book, but to actually see it on screen? Yikes. And it actually has a really stacked cast! How on earth did they convince all these great actors to do a film based around aliens that explode out of your anus??

NUMBER 27

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Title: The Langoliers
Directed by:
Tom Holland
Year:
1995
Starring:
Patricia Wettig, Tom Holland, Kate Maberly, Mark Lindsay Chapman, Bronson Pinchot, David Morse, Dean Stockwell
Notes:
Interesting premise, but laughable 90’s cgi really ruins it.

NUMBER 26

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Title: The Tommyknockers
Directed by:
John Power
Year:
1993
Starring:
Jimmy Smits, Marg Helgenberger, John Ashton, Allyce Beasley, Robert Carradine, Joanna Cassidy, Cliff De Young, Traci Lords
Notes:
I don’t remember much about this except people pulling their own teeth out. But I remember liking it ok. As a side note, Stephen King has said that The Tommyknockers was the product of a mountain of cocaine. So there’s that.

NUMBER 25

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Title: Carrie
Directed by:
Brian De Palma
Year:
1976
Starring:
Sissy Spacek, Piper Laurie, Amy Irving, William Katt, John Travolta, Nancy Allen, Betty Buckley, PJ Soles
Notes:
Good Idea, competently filmed, but it just left me a little cold. It was a little boring for most of the runtime.

NUMBER 24

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Title: Storm of the Century
Directed by:
Craig R Baxley
Year:
1999
Starring:
Tim Daly, Colm Feore, Casey Siemaszko, Debrah Farentino, Dyllan Christopher, Jeffrey DeMunn, Julianne Nicholson
Notes:
I only saw this once, when it aired on tv, and I remember nothing about it except that it was alright. Well, I remember the overall concept, and how it ended, so I guess that’s not exactly nothing.

NUMBER 23

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Title: The Dead Zone
Directed by:
David Cronenberg
Year:
1983
Starring:
Christopher Walken, Brooke Adams, Tom Skerritt, Herbert Lom, Anthony Zerbe, Colleen Dewhurst, Martin Sheen
Notes:
I absolutely loved the book, but the movie was pretty meh. Not awful, but definitely not something I’d watch again.

NUMBER 22

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Title: Secret Window
Directed by:
David Koepp
Year:
2004
Starring:
Johnny Depp, John Turturro, Maria Bello, Timothy Hutton, Charles S Dutton, Len Cariou, John Dunn-Hill
Notes:
Interesting idea, and most of the film was good, but the ending was a little silly. Gotta love messy-haired Johnny, though!

NUMBER 21

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Title: Pet Sematary
Directed by:
Kevin Kölsch, Dennis Widmyer
Year:
2019
Starring:
Jason Clarke, Amy Seimetz, John Lithgow, Jeté Laurence, Hugo and Lucas Lavoie, Obssa Ahmed, Alyssa Brooke Levine
Notes:
It wasn’t god-awful, but it wasn’t good either. It just felt very unnecessary.

NUMBER 20

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Title: The Dark Tower
Directed by:
Nikolaj Arcel
Year:
2017
Starring:
Idris Elba, Matthew McConaughey, Tom Taylor, Dennis Haysbert, Claudia Kim, Jackie Earle Haley, Fran Kranz, Katheryn Winnick
Notes:
*Dreaming about what could have been* *Wakes up* “Oh…” *sigh*

NUMBER 19

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Title: The Shining
Directed by:
Mick Garris
Year:
1997
Starring:
Steven Weber. Rebecca De Mornay, Courtland Mead, Wil Horneff, Melvin Van Peebles, Stanley Anderson, Elliott Gould
Notes:
I know a lot of people didn’t really like this one, but it’s much better than the original (imho), and much closer to the real story.

NUMBER 18

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Title: Apt Pupil
Directed by:
Bryan Singer
Year:
1998
Starring:
Brad Renfro, Ian McKellen, Joshua Jackson, Ann Dowd, Bruce Davison, David Schwimmer, Elias Koteas
Notes:
Now we’re getting into the ones that I really liked. This film was beyond disturbing, but it was very well done. Plus, 17 year old me had a massive crush on Brad Renfro (rip).

NUMBER 17

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Title: Firestarter
Directed by:
Mark L Lester
Year:
1984
Starring:
Drew Barrymore, David Keith, George C Scott, Heather Locklear, Martin Sheen, Louise Fletcher, Freddie Jones, Moses Gunn
Notes:
Not a great movie by any means, but I always have fun with it. George C Scott (rip) is awesome, as always!

NUMBER 16

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Title: The Dark Half
Directed by:
George A Romero
Year:
1993
Starring:
Timothy Hutton, Beth Grant, Amy Madigan, Patrick Brannan, Larry John Meyers, Robert Joy, Kent Broadhurst
Notes:
I should re-visit this one. I remember liking it a whole lot, but I haven’t seen it in literal decades, so I don’t remember much.

NUMBER 15

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Title: Salem’s Lot
Directed by:
Mikael Salomon
Year:
2004
Starring:
Rob Lowe, Andre Braugher, Donald Sutherland, Samantha Mathis, Dan Byrd, Rutger Hauer, James Cromwell, Robert Mammone
Notes:
Finally, a version of Salem’s Lot that I actually liked! With it being a two parter, they really had more time to flesh out the story.

NUMBER 14

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Title: It Chapter 2
Directed by:
Andy Muschietti
Year:
2019
Starring:
James McAvoy, Jessica Chastain, Bill Hader, Isaiah Mustafa, Jay Ryan, James Ransone, Andy Bean, Bill Skarsgård
Notes:
While not a bad movie, it’s definitely not nearly as good as the first one. The original miniseries had that same trouble. Part 2 was good but kinda lacking. And I could have used less cgi and more practical effects. It almost always looks better.

NUMBER 13

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Title: Stand By Me
Directed by:
Rob Reiner
Year:
1986
Starring:
Wil Wheaton, River Phoenix, Corey Feldman, Jerry O’Connell, Kiefer Sutherland, Casey Siemaszko, Gary Riley
Notes:
I haven’t seen this film in years, but parts of it still live in my head. And I had such a crush on River Phoenix that started here and lasted til his untimely death (rip). Based on The Body.

NUMBER 12

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Title: Misery
Directed by:
Rob Reiner
Year:
1990
Starring:
James Caan, Kathy Bates, Richard Farnsworth, Frances Sternhagen, JT Walsh, Misery the Pig
Notes:
Such a great film. That hobbling scene lives rent-free in my head, ugh. Kathy Bates won a very well-earned Oscar for her role.

NUMBER 11

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Title: The Green Mile
Directed by:
Frank Darabont
Year:
1999
Starring:
Tom Hanks, Michael Clarke Duncan, David Morse, Bonnie Hunt, James Cromwell, Michael Jeter, Graham Greene, Barry Pepper, Sam Rockwell
Notes:
An absolutely start-studded cast are amazing in this film. Get out your Kleenex, you’re gonna need it!!

NUMBER 10

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Title: 1408
Directed by:
Mikael Håfström
Year:
2007
Starring:
John Cusack, Samuel L Jackson, Mary McCormack, Tony Shalhoub, Len Cariou, Isiah Whitlock Jr, Jasmine Jessica Anthony
Notes:
I wasn’t sure about this film the first time I saw it, but the more often I watch it, the more I love it.

NUMBER 9

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Title: The Boogeyman
Directed by:
Rob Savage
Year:
2023
Starring:
Sophie Thatcher, Chris Messina, Vivien Lyra Blair, David Dastmalchian, Marin Ireland, Madison Hu
Notes:
I’m not sure if I’m in the minority (again), but I really loved this thing. It kinda got to me, maybe cause I’m afraid of the dark, hehe.

NUMBER 8

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Title: The Mist
Directed by:
Frank Darabont
Year:
2007
Starring:
Thomas Jane, Marcia Gay Harden, Laurie Holden, Nathan Gamble, Andre Braugher, Toby Jones, William Sadler, Jeffrey DeMunn
Notes:
Bad cgi monsters aside, this film is amazing. Everyone gives great performances, and that gut-punch of an ending? Holy shit!

NUMBER 7

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Title: Silver Bullet
Directed by:
Daniel Attias
Year:
1985
Starring:
Corey Haim, Gary Busey, Everett McGill, Megan Follows, Robin Groves, Terry O’Quinn, Leon Russom, Bill Smitrovich
Notes:
I had a MASSIVE crush on Corey Haim (rip) growing up, and so I watched absolutely everything with him in it. This was one of the first ones I saw, and I was surprised at how much I liked it. Based on Cycle of the Werewolf.

NUMBER 6

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Title: Rose Red
Directed by:
Craig R Baxley
Year:
2002
Starring:
Nancy Travis, Matt Keeslar, Kimberly J Brown, Melanie Lynskey, Julian Sands, Matt Ross, David Dukes, Judith Ivey, Julia Campbell, Emily Deschanel
Notes:
Besides my lifelong crush on Julian Sands (rip), this is just a really good haunted house story. It’s surprisingly creepy for something that was made for tv.

NUMBER 5

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Title: Pet Sematary
Directed by:
Mary Lambert
Year:
1989
Starring:
Dale Midkiff, Denise Crosby, Fred Gwynne, Miko Hughes, Brad Greenquist, Michael Lombard, Blaze Berdahl, Andrew Hubatsek
Notes:
Denise Crosby’s atrocious acting aside, this movie is amazing. It’s just so unbelievably creepy. And it’s a pretty good adaptation of the book as well. Bonus points!

NUMBER 4

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Title: It
Directed by:
Tommy Lee Wallace
Year:
1990
Starring:
Jonathan Brandis, Richard Thomas, Emily Perkins, Annette O’Toole, Brandon Crane, John Ritter, Seth Green, Harry Anderson, Adam Faraizl, Dennis Christopher, Marlon Taylor, Tim Reid, Ben Heller, Jarred Blancard, Olivia Hussey, Tim Curry
Notes:
I saw this when it first aired on tv in 1990. I was 9 years old. Probably too young, but there you have it. Tim Curry is unbelievably creepy as Pennywise, and fueled my lifelong fear of clowns.

NUMBER 3

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Title: The Stand
Directed by:
Mick Garris
Year:
1994
Starring:
Gary Sinise, Molly Ringwald, Jamey Sheridan, Ruby Dee, Adam Storke, Rob Lowe, Laura San Giacomo, Bill Fagerbakke, Corin Nemec, Miguel Ferrer, Ossie Davis, Matt Frewer, Bridgit Ryan, Shawnee Smith
Notes:
Clocking in at 6 hours, this is a massive piece of film. And needed all that time because the book is a literal brick! I love this film so much. I give it a re-watch every year or 2 years. I’m actually due, it’s been a while.

NUMBER 2

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Title: The Shawshank Redemption
Directed by:
Frank Darabont
Year:
1994
Starring:
Tim Robbins, Morgan Freeman, Bob Gunton, William Sadler, Clancy Brown, Gil Bellows, James Whitmore, Mark Rolston
Notes:
With an IMDb score of 9.3/10, I don’t really think I need to explain why this one is so good. The acting, the writing, the filming, everything is amazing. Based on Rita Hayworth and Shawshank Redemption.

NUMBER 1

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Title: It
Directed by:
Andy Muschietti
Year:
2017
Starring:
Jaeden Martell, Finn Wolfhard, Sophia Lillis, Jeremy Ray Taylor, Chosen Jacobs, Jack Dylan Grazer, Wyatt Oleff, Nicholas Hamilton, Jackson Robert Scott, Bill Skarsgård
Notes:
I never thought I’d end up loving this film as much as I do, more than the 90’s version. I mean, Tim Curry defined the role as Pennywise, but Bill Skarsgård really knocks it out of the park. This is a perfect film. Too bad the sequel didn’t hit the bar that this one set.

And that’s my list! Agree? Disagree? Let me know!

M.

p.s. There are a few notable films that are missing that I just haven’t gotten around to yet. The Monkey, The Long Walk, and Doctor Sleep are all on my to-watch list. I also want to watch Welcome to Derry, but it wouldn’t have been on this list anyways cause it’s derivative from King’s books, not really based on them.

Mel’s 5 Second Review: The Conjuring – Last Rites

The Conjuring: Last Rites (2025)
Patrick Wilson, Vera Farmiga, Mia Tomlinson, Ben Hardy, Steve Coulter, Rebecca Calder, Elliot Cowan, Beau Gadsdon, and Kíla Lord Cassidy
Directed by: Michael Chaves

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The 4th and supposed final film in the wildly popular Conjuring franchise, I had high hopes for this film, seeing how much I loved the others. And while it’s not a bad movie by any means, it is the least good of the bunch.

Ed and Lorraine find themselves this time facing an entity that hits a little too close to home when it reaches out to attack their daughter, Judy.

I was so excited for this film that I did something I never do: I bought the film as soon as it was available on YouTube for either 25 or 30 bucks. I’m not exactly swimming in the dough, so I generally wait til it’s at least down to 15. And while I’m not entirely mad for spending the money, it really could have waited. Ah well.

First the good. It had a banger of an opening. Very atmospheric, very creepy. I was all in at that point. After that, however, things just got a little… formulaic I guess you could say. I can picture the producers sitting around the table smoking cigarettes and saying “just do what the others did and, oh, add tons of jumpscares and creepy smiles. People like those, right?” I really don’t know why every single entity has to smile these days. Sure, once can be creepy, if it’s done right. But all of them? All the time? Nah. The Conjuring had zero creepy smiles and was so much creepier. But I digress.

Everything in the film looked good. Most of the effects and makeup were very well done, as usual. It’s a little gorier than the previous entries, but it was done well. I even had to look away once (I’m not a huge fan of gore, it tends to make me cringe and look away). The acting was all good, but it has been consistently good for these films, so I wasn’t too surprised there. There were a few good, creepy set pieces, but unfortunately most of them ended with a “graaaahhhh!” jumpscare (cue over-dramatic musical sting here).

So do I recommend it? Yes? I guess? If you loved the series as I do, you’ll likely have a good time with it. It’s definitely not bad, just a little underwhelming as a final curtain film. I give it a decent 7/10.

M.

This film is currently for rent or purchase on YouTube and Prime.

Mel’s 5 Second Review: A Dark Song

A Dark Song (2016)
Catherine Walker and Steve Oram
Directed by: Liam Gavin

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I didn’t know what to expect with this one. All I’d really heard about it is that it was slow and amazing to some people, and awful to others. I’m glad I went in blind though, if I’d heard anything, it’d have ruined the experience. So I’ll try not say too much about it, in case someone else wants to see it.

A young woman who has recently lost her son to ritual murder enlists the help of an occultist to undergo a gruelling year-long ritual that will grant her deepest wish.

I always try to not formulate an opinion about a film before I see it, which is very hard in a day where trailers and people who say their own feelings about the film/movie/book exists. Luckily I’d never seen a trailer for this film. All I knew about it is that it was very polarizing. Some people loved it, other found it dull. Me? I’m in the former category. I kinda loved this thing.

First the good. It looked beautiful. The cinematography is on point. It feels very claustrophobic, even when there’s light streaming in through the windows. The writer/director Liam Gavin builds the tension wonderfully, so that even when it seems like not much is happening, you can feel the dread permeate the atmosphere. While there weren’t that many visual and makeup effects, the bit that we did get (mostly in the third act) were surprisingly great for such a small film. The budget, depending on the source, is said to have been between $25,000 and $50,000, which is crazy to me. It looked so good that I would expect it to be much higher. The acting was incredible from both leads. You might think a film with basically just two people in a house would be boring, but I was never bored. And it all culminates in an ending that I’m not afraid to say was poignant and oddly heartwarming, almost like it belonged in a different film. But it works, all of it. And the bad? Nothing really, this film was wonderful.

So do I recommend it? Absolutely, IF you enjoy slow burn films. If you need constant action, then maybe skip this one. I give it an 8.5/10.

M.

This film is currently streaming on Shudder.

Mel’s 5 Second Review: Abraham’s Boys

Abraham’s Boys (2025)
Titus Welliver, Brady Hepner, Judah Mackey, Jocelin Donahue, Aurora Perrineau, and Jonathan Howard
Directed by: Natasha Kermani

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This one popped up on Shudder the other day, and being the vampire fanatic that I am, I was excited and put it on as soon as I had time. And… oh boy.

Years after defeating Dracula, Abraham Van Helsing and his wife Mina are raising their 2 sons on a seculded ranch. After finding a woman locked up under the house, the boys are told that the evil has followed them, and the monsters must be erradicated. But who’s the real monster?

SPOILERS INCOMING

Now listen. The concept is amazing. 10/10. It’s based on a story written by Joe Hill, so I’m not overly surprised. But the execution… eh. I’ll start with the acting, which ranged from mediocre to laughably bad. I don’t like to harp on child actors, cause it’s a tough gig, but man. There are good child actors out there. The movie looked decent. They got a suitably creepy old house to film in (not sure if it’s “new old” or “old old”), and the dusty, desolate landscape just adds to the ambiance they were going for.

The idea that Van Helsing is simply a murderer that tricked people into thinking there were real vampires is actually really solid. I guessed it from the beginning of the film, but that’s because I’ve seen movies before. I know how they work (most of the time. I still get surprised every so often.) I tried to track down the source material, but could not find it for the life of me. Should anybody read this and knows where to find it, please let me know. The pacing was all over the place, sometimes so slow that you wonder if anything is happening at all, and other times almost frenetic with its movements. I’m not sure what they were going for, but whatever it was, they failed.

So do I recommend it? Eh. Not really. Unless you’re a diehard fan of vampires. But then again, there were no vampires in this vampire movie. Vampire adjacent? Yeah, that’s it. 5/10

M.

This film is currently on Shudder.