Friday, April 3, 2026 at 9:05pm →
Me: ok, that’s the last straw
My manager at the straw mine: great job, let’s head back
Friday, April 3, 2026 at 2:23am →
Friday, April 3, 2026 at 12:13am →
boss to a human employee when they make a mistake: you’re fired
boss to a computer when it makes a mistake: you are a delicate flower capable of love
— daddy gatorade (@trepanation.bsky.social)
Thursday, April 2, 2026 at 10:05pm →
Integrating blüuümpii into my enterprise was effortless. Mostly because it just appeared on our systems after barb clicked an ad for it. But everyone is using it now on all devices. I’m assuming this is wildly profitable for us because it says so very loudly every 6 minutes. — Bobson Dugnut (@mrworldwideweb.bsky.social)
Thursday, April 2, 2026 at 10:04pm →
As a Service Design lead, I can’t tell you how much my team loves integrating blüuümpíi into our daily stand-ups 1) because we have absolutely no choice, 2) because I can’t hear my team very much at all, over blüuümpíi 3) and we fear blüuümpíi — Ipsita Chatterjea (she/her) (@ichatterjea.bsky.social)
Thursday, April 2, 2026 at 10:04pm →
Greetings! I am one of the few engineers in the country trained to understand the intricacies behind the development of blüuümpíi. I understand new tech is scary. So, to help evangelize this revolutionary tool, I will make sure to belittle every person who asks a question about blüuümpíi. — Tommy Valdez (@thomasav.bsky.social)
Thursday, April 2, 2026 at 10:03pm →
hello 👋 i have developed a new tool called blüuümpíi. blüuümpíi will convert every file on your hard drive to a .wav file without asking you, maximize your system volume, and play them on every bluetooth speaker you have ever connected to. if you offer feedback on blüuümpíi i will take legal action — Jon Bois (@jonbois.bsky.social)
Thursday, April 2, 2026 at 5:25pm →
have you guys heard of documentaries? they’re like youtube video essays but they’re usually 1-2 hours long instead of 4 hours long and they don’t have sponsor segments — nat alison (@tesseralis.site)
Thursday, April 2, 2026 at 3:42pm →
Tuesday, March 31, 2026 at 3:12pm →
CHARACTER ACTOR: [badly beaten] john I respect you as a fellow samurai. take my kris. salaam aleikum john wick
JOHN WICK: [punches him unconscious in a way that makes clear he has left him alive, because of mutual respect]
— November Kelly (@postoctobrist.bsky.social)
Tuesday, March 31, 2026 at 3:12pm →
LAURENCE FISHBURNE: im the king of all of the rats. every hobo works for me. i’m hobo god. I run hobo new york. now you come to me for hobo favours
JOHN WICK: [nods]
LAURENCE FISHBURNE: [laughs uproariously]
— November Kelly (@postoctobrist.bsky.social)
Tuesday, March 31, 2026 at 3:12pm →
JOHN WICK: [shoots fifty dudes]
WINSTON: jonathan you’re expelliarmus. I have no choice but to instigato you to the syndicaticus
HOT LADY: thats right
[she tries to kill John Wick]
— November Kelly (@postoctobrist.bsky.social)
Tuesday, March 31, 2026 at 11:00am →
Me to an Ancient Roman: Yeah this is a digital computer
What the Roman hears: This is a guy who counts with his fingers
— Wylfċen (@wylfcen)
Tuesday, March 31, 2026 at 2:11am →
(Me): so, we create this “virtual memory” to trick processes into thinking they have a contiguous address layout
(Medieval peasant): Would not thy abstraction swell the tally of mem'ry lookups?
(Me): well, yes. to deal with that we created the “translation lookaside buffer”
— tomie (@tomieinlove)
Monday, March 30, 2026 at 4:37pm →
In that passage, Lorde is simultaneously “far smarter than I am about nearly everything” and also wrong about the thing that matters for the argument at hand. The invocation and the dismissal occur in the same breath. This is, structurally, a version of what Lorde was diagnosing in 1979.
