Mangina Monologues

I’m in Palm Springs and I’ve heard about the local gay gym— Steel Gym.

It’s about 2.5 miles straight up the road from where I live. And it’s gay. Like “cruisy” gay. But also geared to working out. But gay.

I saw online that they offer packs of passes for people to use who may be transient. So I decided to explore it yesterday, and I got myself a pack of 10 passes to use as I want when I visit.

I rode my bike up there (it’s so awesome to be more mobile now) and checked it out. And it’s… gay.

It’s not the level of nice that I’m used to at my bougie Lifetime Fitness. Let’s just say the equipment is a reflection of the clientele. Very old school dumbbells and barbells. Older cyber equipment. Etc.

But- the fun thing is that everywhere you look? Gay. Vetting levels of daddy hotness, muscle guys, younger guys. all in shorts that have inseams no longer than 5”.

And then there’s the occasional two dudes making out by the fly station.

In addition there’s the locker room.

Lockers- where everyone is basically naked. Smallish sauna. Where everyone is basically naked. Fairly large stream room- where everyone was basically naked. And hard.

I guess it’s known for things “happening” there. It didn’t with me- but I’ve heard stories.

Anyway, I highly recommend checking out a fully gay gym at some point. It’s a religious experience. Plus, I feel more like a local now!

The last couple of weeks have been… busy.

The first week of April was chock full of rehearsals for our Spring concert. It was the Saturday before Easter so, in addition was all the Easter crap- plus end of month craziness at work on March 30th and 31st.

Then last week I was deep in a quality system audit at work (our Annual plus full recertification audit). That was a three day joy starting last Wednesday. The audit went decently well- even if the auditor is always kind of an asshole to me. I just smile and go into “polite mode”, as any good gay boy learns how to do in the business world.

Then this past weekend was mom’s birthday so I was down in Iowa for that. With cake and cookies and flowers and such. I think mom had a pretty good one. She had visits from friends on Friday and Sunday.

Now this is a short week- as I jet off to PS for 5 days starting Wednesday. I cannot. Fucking. Wait. I want to be there so badly I can taste it. I seriously miss my place when I’m not there.

On the agenda this time is finishing some painting (front and lanai doors), getting stereo set up, some lighting work, and meeting with my HVAC/Electrical guy to line up some home improvements.

And going to the pool. And partying. And relaxing. And visiting friends. I am hoping to reconnect with a friend I haven’t seen in probably 25 years who now lives out there.

Gosh- it would be a shame if I had to change my flight back to Monday instead of Sunday…..

(When I get back it’s another mom weekend, then book club and band concert weekend) then we’re into Pride month…. Jesus.)

I haven’t done a good ol post about my work environment in awhile so here goes.

They are really pissing me off.

I got my 30 second pay inrease last week. Given that I was rated a solid 3 on my review, I knew what was coming. 3% raise- so not really even cost of living adjustment.

As predicted.

I just laughed when my boss told me and I said “I saw this coming a mile away. Winchester has turned into every other company where I’ve worked.”

So I’m already in a “solid 3” mode at work.

And I have this bossy bitch basically giving me directions from Florida. No- she’s not my boss. She’s a quality engineer. And she is working my last fucking nerve.

Today I basically told her to piss off. She was asking for updates on why a couple items hadn’t moved out of inspection yet.

First- why are you up my ass about this?

Second- Friday was a holiday.

Third- I was never consulted about this new 72 hour or less goal.

Fourth- I’m disinclined to acquiesce to your request.

In other words… get off. My dick.

Seriously. Florida- you have enough shit of your own to focus on. Give it a rest. And who the fuck CARES if we miss the 72 hour deadline? Really. Like- what happens if we just… don’t? Are there any real consequences? You gonna fire me?

No.

Is it a completely arbitrary goal that was pulled out of an ass that doesn’t really impact day to day customer satisfaction?

Yes. Yes it is.

Seriously people. Get👏your👏shit👏together👏

I’m about 50/50 with impulse control.

It’s a good thing I’m not a super addictive personality. Like, with alcohol I go for months without drinking. No problem. No desire for drugs. No desire to gamble. Don’t play video games. I’m not a clothes horse so- meh.

Accessories (like jewelry or bags or belts) can be a strugglebus. But normally I can rein it in. And with certain food it can be a challenge, but as long as I’m not hungry- no issue.

And if the purchase is a big one (like, say a 1957 mobile home in Palm Springs? Well, that took about 10 years of saving and budgeting and spreadsheets and pro-con listing to realize.

But.

There seems to be a monetary threshold for things where I may or may not have impulse buy issues. And that dollar figure changes depending upon the type of item and the amount of desire.

Like, if it’s a lower $ amount, and I’ve wanted it for a few months- I may just give in. Or if it’s a higher $ figure, but I’ve coveted it (or something like it) for years, I may just justify the purchase with little effort and say “fuck it” and just do it.

Like yesterday.

Sooooooo I may or may not have received an email from a store that I bought something from once many years ago (and I’m on their mailing list). Normally I just delete them, but I was bored at work so I opened it.

And they had something for sale. Several something’s actually. And For the sake of argument let’s say this was in the original art family of things.

Aaaaaaand let’s just say for many years I’ve wanted something by said artist. So much so that I do internet searches every few months just to see if things are available.

While most of the art was well outside my $$$ threshold (like uncomfortable laughter outside my threshold), one piece… wasn’t.

😬

And I liked it. Not just because it was semi-affordable, but because aesthetically I liked the piece. The style. The image. The sexiness of it.

The internal debate started instantly. Do I? Don’t I? But you’ve been looking…. All that. I told myself to marinate the idea while I did some additional work.

I lasted all of five minutes.

I watched the Artemis II launch at the gym yesterday. I was in the treadmill and happened to see the tv’s at the gym showing the rocket sitting in the launch pad. So I switched my treadmill screen over to the special coverage.

Just in time too, as the launch was in the final minute countdown.

I’m not gonna lie- I felt a certain thrill when the engines ignited and there was liftoff. And I may or may not have gotten a bit teary-eyed as the rocket stormed heavenward. And then the boosters fell away.

It sort of felt like I was watching a launch for the first time.

Now, I know that rockets are being launched like about every day. Satellites and other shit are going up at a dizzying frequency. And yes, there are some manned flights that go to the space station.

But on launch has felt as significant as this one. Not since the Space Shuttle anyway.

The space shuttle was an interesting period in space history- but to me the thing always felt… clunky. This big plane thing strapped to a fat rocket. And it was only ever going to a low orbit- not like the moon or anything.

The last time we went to the moon was December of 1972. I was three and I don’t really remember it. What I do remember was the joint Soviet US docking in space in 1975. I remember going outside with my parents and neighbors and seeing the bright speck in the night sky as they orbited overhead.

I remember the Challenger disaster, too. Vividly. And Columbia.

After that, I only cared about Mars rover missions. Sort of.

And then I was intrigued by all the probe missions to land on the moon- which all failed spectacularly. Which- given our technology is leaps and bounds beyond 1969- begs the question of how exactly did we manage to get people to the moon back then?

Or even did we? (This is my favorite conspiracy theory).

So- seeing this mission with four astronauts strapped to this thundering rocket had me kind of holding my breath. I watched until the 8+ minute mark and the stage 2 separation.

I hope this journey is successful. Even though I don’t know why we really need to send people back to the moon. Or Mars.

I like to think of myself as a clean person. Not a clean freak, mind you. I don’t see a speck of dust and get out a mini Dyson or anything. Just more “tidy”. That’s probably a good word for it. I like to keep things in a semblance of order.

I’m a Virgo. Sue me.

Now, if you were to see my condo, it is by no means spotless or immaculate. There is mail stacked on the kitchen island. The rugs need a vacuum. Some shelves need dusting. The wood floors need a clean. The Kitchen needs to be picked up a bit. And I’m sure there are dust bunnies under my bed.

But all in all it’s in a manageable state.

And if there are guests coming over (and by guests I mean tricks) I always pick the place up. Laundry and dishes get bussed. Table tops get cleaned. I’ll pick errant cat hair off the carpet. I wipe down toilet and bathroom counter. You know- make things presentable.

And if friends are coming over? Full on clean. Dusting. Vacuum. Steam mop. Kitchen sink, stove, and counters cleaned. Bathroom cleaned. Everything picked up and put away. Again, it’s never Martha Stewart level, but it’s clean and comfy.

I can’t fathom it being otherwise. Even the thought of having a messy house for guests just stresses me out.

So you can imagine how I might have a minor anxiety attack if I visit someone’s home and it’s in, shall we say, disarray? And by disarray I mean full on chaos.

I may or may not have visited such a place recently.

Now, I will say they do have children. So right there that adds to the level of grime. But in this case? There were toys everywhere. I mean, they were strewn across the floor like landmines in Angola. And they were on every conceivable surface. Chairs. Tables. Window ledges. Everywhere.

I was physically uncomfortable in the space.

It was like I was in that scene in Parks and Rec:

Leslie: why are you wearing a poncho?

Katherine: because literally every surface in your house is sticky. Last time I was here I found a melted crayon stuck to my blazer…

I honestly don’t think I can go back there. At least not to spend any length of time.

Eh. Work.

Why can’t the higher-ups actually treat folks well? Have they not learned anything from well run businesses and business leaders with high acumen?

The number one piece of advice is always: if you take care of your workers, they will take care of the business and your customers. Period.

Give your workers perks. Treat them like people. Reward good behavior. Give them autonomy. Provide them with good training and the tools to do their job.

It’s not fucking rocket surgery.

goals ago I posted about my annual review- where I was rated “adequate”. Even after achieving (and exceeding) all my goals for the year. This was basically so they wouldn’t have to give me anything more than a cost of living increase.

Awesome sauce.

Our new VP of operations has also decided to cut back on the ever popular employee appreciation lunches. They used to be once a month. Now it’s once a quarter.

We also used to get these Awardco or Bonusly points as kudos- which you could amass and then get things from a company store. I haven’t seen an awardco point awarded in ages now. I am pretty sure they’re just quietly killing it off.

But then- in a small bright spot- we finally got our bonus payout for hitting our goals last year. And it paid out nicely! Because again- we exceeded our goals set forth by corporate. So that was a bright spot, as it has been for the past 3 years for me.

Well, this year they just emailed out our “goals” for the bonus program and asked us to sign them for acknowledgement. And what did they do?

They lumped our business unit in with two other units and made them “overall team goals” to achieve. Because Together Everone Achieves More… even though we don’t share anything with these other units except a corporate logo. So nothing we do even indirectly impacts or assists them in any way.

And as you may have guessed- these other two business units are chronic underperformers. The upshot? We are almost assuredly guaranteed a minimal bonus next year. If any.

My guess is they saw how much they had to pay out in bonuses and said “hmmm, what can we do to kill this although still make it look like there’s bonus potential?”

Idiots.

And they wonder why we can’t hire or attract any new talent.

Have you eaten at a Micky D’s lately? It’s a horrible experience.

First- it’s freakin expensive. Two “regular size” value meals is gonna cost you like 20 bucks. And for what? A handful of fries and a crappy burger?

Mom wanted chez Mac this past weekend so I got her a quarter pounder meal and myself the 10pc McNuggets. It was so not worth it.

The fries- which used to be the best part of any McDonald’s trip- were soggy and bland. Not great. And the fuckers forgot my nuggy sauce. Ever eaten McNuggets plain?

Ew.

I also had to wait about 10 minutes to get the food. “Sir, please pull forward to the waiting area.”

I remember when the fries were crispy and good, and you got your food at the same window where you paid. And it was given to you right then. There was no waiting- because it’s called fast food, bitches!

The worst part? After eating my Golden Arches feast- I felt grody. Like, sort of queasy and gross. Greasy shit gross.

Remember when going to McDonalds was a treat growing up? Now I just sorta hope they wither and fail.

A few posts ago I wrote about missing my Bose wave clock radio. Well- that has been successfully rectified.

Behold!

A replacement now graces my nightstand! It works perfectly, has two remotes, is in great shape, and the sound is lovely! The sellers even sent the original manual!

It arrived yesterday and I set it up before bed. Even without the manual, setting time and alarms are fairly intuitive. It was as if we’d never said goodbye! However, the manual did refresh me on how to set it in military time- along with a couple other display options.

I woke me up with a gentle fade in of NPR this morning. It was lovely.

And best of all? I feel like a small corner of my world has been put to right again.

P.S. I also purchased a refurbished larger Bose acoustic wave stereo (Radio/CD player with inputs) that was delivered to my Cali abode. Can’t wait to fire that puppy up and get some CD’s down there!

For the longest time, I had a Bose Wave clock radio. Man, I loved that thing!

Remember them? They were all the rage in the 90’s. So many Bose infomercials about them, you couldn’t help but see them. And want one.

I had the cream colored version- pictured above. I believe it was a Christmas gift one year- my step brother and I each got one. And yes it came with the remote. No CD player, because who needed that? I just wanted an alarm clock that woke me up with good music that faded in gently each morning – and where I could occasionally play the radio and have good audio.

Or maybe even aux in a CD player or whatever. It had jacks in the back.

I quite liked the design of it. Kind of mod and angular. Sleek. The soft touch buttons. The ease of use. I think you could set multiple alarms. It had an easy snooze button. Just the basics but with good sound quality with thicc bass.

But alas, my Bose eventually died. One day it just stopped working. Probably a power surge took it out at some point, I don’t remember exactly. But it was a dark day when I lost it, let me tell you. (It was maybe 4 years ago now).

The worst part? Bose had discontinued making them by then so I couldn’t even replace it. What the fuck, Bose? Do people not clock radio anymore??

In the interim, I got a semi-decent clock radio as a replacement. I like it ok, but it’s super convoluted to set time and alarms on. Fuck only knows how to snooze the damn thing. And it isn’t very elegantly styled (it’s a wood box). So lately I’ve been pining away for my old Bose that I would never be able to replace.

Or so I thought.

So the other day decided to do an Internet search to see if maybe Bose started making them again. Or if there was a cool new equivalent.

That’s when I discovered that they do sort of still exist- in the refurbished eBay market. There are quite a few to be had, actually.

One fewer now— because I scooped one up. I figure 95 bucks is ok to spend if I get a few more years of quality clock radioness.

Oh- and I may or may not have also indulged in a refurbished Bose acoustic Wave 3000- for a slight retro touch in my Palm Springs pad.

Of course I got it in white.