Archive for friends

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Posted in friends with tags , on March 28, 2026 by jefferyrn

We have had a house guest since Wednesday.  A man we met in New Orleans last year. He is from North Carolina.  And our neighbor Sam (Dorothy) also has a friend visiting from North Carolina. Turns out they both live in the suburbs of Raleigh.  It’s a small world.

Today we have a little break. He is visiting with a friend in Palm Springs for lunch.  So I have a little time to blog.

I posted about our hummingbird bird nest. Well that’s on the front patio (courtyard). Now we have a Mallard duck family on the back patio.  So far it’s  just a male and a female but it is spring.

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Not the best picture cause I didn’t want to spook them off. He is there on the patio and she is in the dirt next to that flower pot.

Tonight we are going to happy hour at the clubhouse. Hopefully our visitor will return and go with us, but he is on a sort of date so he may or may not return this evening.  Such a tramp. My kind of friend.

Anyway we will have some neighbors over after the happy hour with or without him. I do hope he returns so they can meet him. He’s a hoot.

More on this later …

P.S. he posed for me.

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It’s been awhile

Posted in friends with tags , on January 19, 2026 by jefferyrn

I have been in a ho hum state since the New Year.  Holiday let down is what I called it as a kid. As an adult I really had no expectations.  So maybe it’s just a reflective moment. 

Things are happening beyond my control. The orange menace is very upsetting.  Friends with health issues, finance issues, my own medical insurance issues, and taxes. What fun!

Our friends from Santa Rosa gave us a surprise visit.  Tom’s sister has some serious cancer and has been in and out of the City of Hope, just down the road a piece from here in Duarte.   They stayed with us a few days to recover and vent as friends do. We were happy to be there for them. But it was draining on me emotionally.

This week might be back to something that resembles normal, whatever that means anymore.

We went to happy hour on Saturday.  That was really a nice time. We met some new neighbors and shared stories, and drank way too much. Luckily we only had to stumble up the grass hill from the clubhouse to our condo.

After such an adventure I needed a full day to recover.  I am old and don’t bounce back like I did in my younger days.  Sunday was lost.

I have some half baked ideas to write here. I just need to take a moment and get er done.

New friends

Posted in friends with tags on September 9, 2025 by jefferyrn

We are on our way home after galavanting around the country, San Diego, New Orleans, Sacramento, Redding, Portland and everything in-between.

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Elephants on a bridge*

Home sounds good to me. We will get there in time for Taco Tuesday.  Food is a force of nature that seems to rule our lives.

A few notes here from our travels that I didn’t mention before.  We made a friend in New Orleans, Tommy from North Carolina. He was sitting at a table next to us eating breakfast alone. We struck up a conversation about the weekend of festivities.

He came for his Birthday.  He just turned 60.  He didn’t even know about Southern Decadence until he arrived.   I told him it would soon be my birthday too.  Next thing you know we are making plans to meet up later for drinks.

Long story short, we had drinks every night and went to dinner twice. He was a hoot with his southern accent he sounds like Gomer Pyle. He has our sense of humor too. We had fun making comments on people in the crowd, dancers, etc. We went to the parade together.

He claimed to be innocent and we were helping him come out of his shell. He really didn’t need that much encouragement. Now we are still communicating through texts almost everyday, kindred spirits.

We made a few other acquaintances but most of them were just for the evening. People were really friendly in a town full of strangers. Southern hospitality is a real thing and at a pride event politics are not an issue.

*The elephants on the Merced overpasses are actually black silhouettes of Columbian Mammoths placed to commemorate the discovery of nearly 2,000 Ice Age fossils in the area during a Highway 99 construction project in 2012. The art installation was a joint effort by Caltrans District 10 and the Madera County Arts Council to celebrate the region’s prehistoric past and the fossils that were found, which included a complete tusk discovered in 1993.  

Willow Lake Drive (a.k.a. Rainbow Ridge)

Posted in friends, random with tags on August 20, 2025 by jefferyrn

A community can be a wonderful thing.  We live in a gated community of about 100 units.  Many of them are used as second homes and are only occupied during “the season”. These seasonal residents are a different breed.  Getting to know the permanent residents is the goal.

To that end we have an HOA board. There is a quirky old lady, wife of the board president, who fancies herself as the social director.  Events are held at the clubhouse, but generally only “in season.”  She was once a transient part timer and old habits die hard. She is no use to us full timers  We nicknamed her Mrs. Bucket from “Keeping up appearance”.

The story here ends with a cocktail party that lasts till 1:30 am.

Elections were held for a new board member and we voted for a young man we met at the Democratic Election Night Watch Party for Kamala Harris (Hyacinth Bucket didn’t plan this one she’s Canadian) Kamala didn’t win and later neither did our man on the board. We’ll call him Dave for this tale.

We need to go back a little and provide some history.  Let’s go back when we moved in 4 years ago.   Our building has six units and are single story.  The first unit on Willow Lake Drive belongs to Dorothy.  She welcomed us on our first day with a bottle of champagne. She told us she influenced the previous owners, asking them to accept our offer.  She was thrilled to have two gay men move into the complex being a bi/lesbian herself.

A few months later we had two gays and there mother move in two doors down.  We call them the “young gays”,  Cameron and Cody.  Then the place right next door was up for sale two years ago and we encouraged a nice gay man from New York to purchase it, Philippe, he’s French Canadian.  That was it we are now known as Rainbow Ridge.

There are other LGBTQ+ residents throughout the place but we are the biggest cluster on top of a small hill near the entrance.

The other two residents in our building are not family, per say, but a divorced mother and here 16 year old boy live in one.  The are very friendly and supportive.

That leaves one unit on the far end.  He and his wife are Trumpster flag flying Republicans.  We avoid them. So far they have kept to themselves.

Okay, so one more thing there is a man in his late eighties who knows everything and everyone.  He is the town gossip and goes around picking fruit from the various citrus trees in the park and leases some on the top of our mailboxes.  We call him the  “fruit fairy”, Myles. Oh, and he always has a story to tell. Part gossip and then he finishes with a dirty joke. He never blushes but we cringe sometimes. Interestingly enough he used to rent the end unit from the Trumpster before they kicked him out to live there themselves.

He now rents from the man’s sister on the other side of Willow Lake Drive.  Willow Lake circles the community with several culdesacs that fill in the middle along with the ponds and streams, the clubhouse and 3 swimming pools.

All of this background and my post has gotten lengthy.  I will continue tomorrow with Dave and the cocktail party. Cheers!

United we stand

Posted in family, friends, politics with tags , , on November 9, 2024 by jefferyrn

If we can’t unite as neighbors, how can we possibly unite as a country? If we can’t unite within our own families and circle of friends we can’t move forward as a nation.

What does this mean? It doesn’t mean that we agree on everything. It doesn’t mean that we accept everything either.  It means we find things we can agree on and put those things into action.

It’s a tall order, this idea called common ground. It’s simple yet extremely hard to accomplish. Emotions, fears, financial issues, trusting and past experience hold us back.

We need to listen to each other and not just think of a rebuttal. We need to hear what people tell us and understand why they have those opinions.  If you don’t know and understand what your differences are you can’t possibly change them or come up with agreeable solutions.

We need to do this at home, in our neighborhoods, and our environments at work, and our communities.  We cannot live in isolation and expect things to happen.

I know it sounds good on paper and getting out there and exposing ourselves is exhausting and scary.  But if we don’t, if we remain complacent, we lose control of our future and fear wins.

Unpacking Thanksgiving

Posted in death, family, friends with tags , , , on November 29, 2021 by jefferyrn

Thanksgiving can be a stressful time. We make plans to get together with family and friends. We eat rich foods and drink wine. We go shopping. All of this is an atmosphere for great drama. Rules are put into place. Don’t talk about politics or religion. Don’t be critical of other family members and how they raise their children. Don’t comment on how old everyone looks. But we all have the one relative that baits us into an argument and the drama begins.

Thanksgiving Day in the United States

Now that is a typical Thanksgiving. In our case add death. It was the first Thanksgiving without my mother. It was the first Thanksgiving without my brother in-law. It was the first Thanksgiving without our dear friends who passed in the days before. One friend died on Thanksgiving day! Rather than death taking a holiday, it took over.

We made due as best as we could. First we were having Thanksgiving in Morro Bay with mom. Then we were going to Port Hueneme to have dinner with my sister. Then we were all staying home, what was left of us. My nephew spend the week cleaning out mom’s house. An ominous task that I am truly thankful to him for taking on. My sister was supposed to have Thanksgiving with neighbors and play games afterward but her allergies and the Santa Anna winds had her staying home. We went to a resort buffet dinner. Not very good but we got out of the house for the afternoon.

Any attempts at putting up decorations for Christmas failed miserably too. All the boxes are out of the closet and stacked in the living room. No one is interesting spreading them out. The tree is out of the box and plugged in to the wall. The star took two days to get on top of the tree, after numerous failed attempts. Two stars went back to the store. Too heavy. No way to get them to stay up right. Finally, and old star came out of retirement and with a few chop sticks and floral wire it was attached to the top. I found a nice skirt at HomeGoods. We tried one of those tin fence things they are selling this year. It looked ridiculous. Back to the store with the stars.

Maybe we will actually put up decorations this week. I did get back to moving. We went for a long walk down El Paseo looking in all the shops and fancy restaurants. My legs are hurting this morning so it must have done some good.

Now I am hoping death does take a holiday, because enough is enough.

Death Takes a Holiday (Paramount, 1934). Lobby Card (11" X 14"). | Lot  #54095 | Heritage Auctions
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