One Hitter Quitters

If any of you ever want to launch one of those "Top 10 Ways to Make a Girl Break up With You" kind of blogs, make sure some of these specimens are on the list. Somewhere in between Fortnite themed flip flops, and listening to Ed Sheeran.

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Too Awkward For Porn

To call this girl a boring bang would be the understatement of the damn millennium. I'll put it this way: If you combined a gender studies course with the PGA, you'd still need a 3 hour Al Gore audio book and jumper cables to match pulses with this fucking corpse. You've been warned.

Blame it on the BBC

I guess this is what happens when your Netflix and Chill night turns into a solo adventure and you start organizing the "Foreign Girls That Like WuTang" sub-folder in your NUT directory. I don't know, I see more reasons you shouldn't cornhole wild life thanks to her constant deer-in-headlights reaction than I do sitcom legends. Thoughts?

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How to Make a Girl From Okinawa Cum

Is it even possible to bring an oriental female to orgasm without the help of Bob Vila's signature series at this point? I don't know what evolutionary timeline they're living in over there, I can promise you this road only leads to an addiction to Newport cigarettes and a whole lot of apologies.

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The Undisputed Champ of Premature Ejaculation

What happens when you try to clone Mike Tyson, but the machine takes the eggplant emoji seriously? Sorry, but that specimen needs to be noted here. Was it's purpose to inflict maximum damage, or an aerodynamic choice to reach a new velocity?

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Rookie Does A Blowbang

This one taught me two things: A) Breaking points are negotiable and B) Any case studies of being on the spectrum and in porn can now be cancelled. Dorkalina's got us covered.

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Anal Virgin Redeems Herself

goblin mode; the behavior of someone who wants to feel comfortable doing whatever they want, not caring about trying to be clean, healthy, attractive or about impressing other people. [PART I]

The Single Greatest Blowjob of ALL Time

We had to go back, way back and deep into the pornography archives of the 1970's. All those hours of sifting through pale, over exposed bodies and bush was worth it to uncover this beautiful forgotten gem.

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14 Incher Sends Girl To Emergency Room

In today's episode of Things You Shouldn't Cram Up Your Asshole, we're being educated by a trio of goofys who had no backup plan when their gargantuan sex toy decided to swim into deeper waters. Dude's first response? "I'm gonna fuck it while it's in there". Pure poetry. [more here]

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The Absolute Worst Of Pornhub XIV

The more this behavior becomes mainstream, the harder it's going to be to come back from. Just ask the portfolios of any person that's posted on r/wallstreetbets. [more here]

Girl Drops Deuce, Forgets To Wipe

Her ability to wipe her ass is on par with Tom Sizemore's ability to not beat women. Fortunately at least 1 person in this vid has some considerable talent, and that's the dude that miraculously didn't peel over & die after getting a whiff of her shit-box!

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Interracial Blowbang Confessions

"Django the Fifth's Revenge" is the story of a self-proclaimed "black cock beast" on a mission. Notice the highly viscous load of seminal fluid dangle dancing off her chin the whole scene.

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