📍 Dresden, DE studying computer stuff 🎓 software dev, sysadmin, local server maid 🔧 queer as in polyam transbian demi cuddleslut Relationship Anarchy AuDHD 24y/o
May post in German or English or beides.
- Follow requests of personal accounts are welcome! Please have a bio and some toots at least for a basic vibe check. Also, I appreciate any prior interactions (favorite/comment/...) so I have an idea why you're interested :) - DMs are open, especially for any trans siblings! - flirting with me is welcome! - going through my post history and liking a bunch of them is completely fine with me /gen
sexual orientation labels, attraction, selfI label myself lesbian or sapphic because that's what I vibe the most with atm, but tbh I don't view that in a very strict way. It's more about the interpersonal vibe I associate with that, and I tend to find feminine features attractive and masculine features not. I can also find a non-feminine guy hot, and I find myself attracted to people for reasons detached from physical appearance as well, regardless of their (perceived) gender. When I started to discover my queerness I used to label myself bi, and I'd consider pan if I ever come across a guy I find myself attracted to personality wise who doesn't start transitioning after xD /hj (not that I have anything at all against more femmes :3 )
tl;dr: the universe is a hologram, attraction is a fuck, abolish categories and celebrate the wide spectrum of individual expression and so on
[read before following] meta, giving benefit of doubt, playing devils advocate, etcI do not want to associate with people who'd directly assume the worst possible intentions in others, even if they disagree hard on something the other one is talking about.
Neither do I want to associate with people who play devils advocate for others who show time and time again that they don't act in good faith, or "centrists" about uncompromisable issues like human rights.
And I especially don't want to have anything to do with anyone who'd find it acceptable to publicly slander others. (slander, not reasonably calling out bad behavior when that would benefit others.)
If we can't agree that that kind of conduct is bad, I don't think we'll get along, so please don't follow me in that case, thanks.
(This was prompted by several unrelated things, please don't assume knowing what or who this might be about. I won't comment about any specifics here either.)
family+, personal, coming out, polyamory / relationship anarchyLast Sunday I was visiting my family and got into quite a deep conversation with my mother for the first time in years. We were talking about all kinds of emotional topics, and when we got to friendships and relationships and stuff, I seized the opportunity and kind of.. infodumped all of my thoughts and insights that I've gained over the past ~2y on romantic/platonic/sexual relationships, feelings of love and jealousy, good communication, dealing with issues that inevitably arise at times, and so on.. 😅
I told her about me and my partner's journey from an exclusive relationship towards an open one, polyamory and eventually relationship anarchy; how we faced problems and dealt with them together; how every step only deepened our bond and mutual trust; how no feelings for other people take anything away from my love for my partner, who I built a life with.
She took it quite well, asked questions without questioning me / my decisions, and gave me the impression that she does get it. It felt so good doing this; I've been meaning to for quite some time, but didn't know how. I'm happy that I'm no longer keeping such a meaningful part of what makes me me from her, and I'm so glad that I was able to do it this way and not out of pressure when it would have gotten impossible to keep (without actively hiding a relationship, which is a line I wouldn't cross) in the future.
And I'm feeling a lot more close to her and my family now, after being distant for so long. I've made the decision to be true to myself and go my own way that was not laid out for me (and I'm thriving!), and they've made their decision to come along. It will not have been the last deep conversation between me and my parents, and I'm optimistic about our relationship. :)
re: sui but requested by other people, gotta love the local hackspace@commanderred plenty of assholes in hackspaces/chaos everywhere, and much too few people who'd stand up against them for others. I see it again and again unfortunately. Sorry all that happened to you :/
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