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(this is an expanded version of multiple posts made to our tumblr, with some additions and changes)
i feel like so many plurals could benefit from just being told that no, you do not need to use origin labels. you do not need to know how you formed, originally or otherwise, and you do not need to share this information with anyone else. this also applies to roles too, you do not need to use them whatsoever, you do not need to assign them to any member, no-one needs to know anyone's roles, and frankly you should be letting people decide if they want to use roles, and if so what role(s) they want to use for themself.
honestly i don't have anything against roles or origin terms as a concept, and i understand why they may be helpful for people. but a lot of the modern community's culture focuses heavily on both as if they're the most important parts of your plurality and existence as a system member respectively, while it's only one small part of your identity(s). take origins for an example. in a lot of cases, how you formed doesn't matter. you do not need to go on a massive quest to figure out why you're plural, especially when you've only recently figured out you're plural in the first place!
as someone who's known about their plurality 5+ years now (although ironically i personally have only been here around 6 months :P), which isn't that long in the grand scheme of things but feels like forever when interacting with a lot of plurals especially on sites like tumblr honestly, things got far easier once we stopped worrying about both. i wish the plural community could understand this instead of pushing both onto newer systems. we especially had a really negative experience with roles, with us feeling like we had to assign each member one as soon as they formed into existence. this led to so many cases of people forced into roles where frankly they didn't want them, the role was frankly just restricting, and them like they have to stick to this and it's the central part of their existence. which is bad and horrible.
i wish the plural community could understand this instead of pushing both onto newer systems i feel like so many plurals would benefit far more from just focusing on the present, your plurality right now, and anything you need to do to make your plurality a positive experience for you all. not categorizing or worrying about your origins or each members "purpose"
or yknow. in the words of this image my headfriend silas made while complaining about terms in general:
- dr. ████ "doc" cerebrum (it/its)
i feel like so many plurals could benefit from just being told that no, you do not need to use origin labels. you do not need to know how you formed, originally or otherwise, and you do not need to share this information with anyone else. this also applies to roles too, you do not need to use them whatsoever, you do not need to assign them to any member, no-one needs to know anyone's roles, and frankly you should be letting people decide if they want to use roles, and if so what role(s) they want to use for themself.
honestly i don't have anything against roles or origin terms as a concept, and i understand why they may be helpful for people. but a lot of the modern community's culture focuses heavily on both as if they're the most important parts of your plurality and existence as a system member respectively, while it's only one small part of your identity(s). take origins for an example. in a lot of cases, how you formed doesn't matter. you do not need to go on a massive quest to figure out why you're plural, especially when you've only recently figured out you're plural in the first place!
as someone who's known about their plurality 5+ years now (although ironically i personally have only been here around 6 months :P), which isn't that long in the grand scheme of things but feels like forever when interacting with a lot of plurals especially on sites like tumblr honestly, things got far easier once we stopped worrying about both. i wish the plural community could understand this instead of pushing both onto newer systems. we especially had a really negative experience with roles, with us feeling like we had to assign each member one as soon as they formed into existence. this led to so many cases of people forced into roles where frankly they didn't want them, the role was frankly just restricting, and them like they have to stick to this and it's the central part of their existence. which is bad and horrible.
i wish the plural community could understand this instead of pushing both onto newer systems i feel like so many plurals would benefit far more from just focusing on the present, your plurality right now, and anything you need to do to make your plurality a positive experience for you all. not categorizing or worrying about your origins or each members "purpose"
or yknow. in the words of this image my headfriend silas made while complaining about terms in general:
- dr. ████ "doc" cerebrum (it/its)
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it's exclusionists pushing an us VS them mentality. "if you've been through trauma, then you're traumagenic, so you have DID, so you need to agree with us and avoid the rest of the community because they're dangerous for us!" type shit. it doesn't matter how we originated, i will keep screaming this from the rooftops until people get it! i'm not being pushed into what's commonly a "good system/bad system" box.
besides. even if we knew we had 100% definitely formed due to trauma, i wouldn't want to label ourselves as such. why do i want the trauma that we've been spending years healing and moving on from to define a major part of our identity, it feels counterproductive
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Yes ...
It certainly isn't a requirement. It can be useful in problem-solving, but not essential there either. Nobody should be pestered or made to feel lesser because they don't have or want origin labels.
>> you do not need to share this information with anyone else.<<
Privacy applies.
>>a lot of the modern community's culture focuses heavily on both as if they're the most important parts of your plurality and existence as a system member respectively<<
Sounds like the queer community. Some people obsess over labels, some don't care, and others are vehemently opposed.
>> i wish the plural community could understand this instead of pushing both onto newer systems. <<
Well, anyone who knows better can make a point of saying that when you spot newcomers. It'll help.
>> i feel like so many plurals would benefit far more from just focusing on the present, your plurality right now, and anything you need to do to make your plurality a positive experience for you all. <<
Well reasoned.
Again, I've had a very similar talk regarding sex/romance identities. It does not matter if your orientation is fluid, unclear, or a phase. How you feel today is important and something to work with as you see fit. So what if it might be something else next year? This isn't next year, this is today.
>> or yknow. in the words of this image my headfriend silas made while complaining about terms in general: <<
I love that graphic.