Sun Salutation

Here I am, adrift in a day filled with smoldering breezes that are quick to turn stagnant,
looking for the sun to burn away the dust and smoggy haze in the air so I can breathe. June gloom in the valley.  Sticky air carried over from overripe peaches decaying amidst orchard clods not unlike the peonies pirouetting in patriotic colors taken to my dad's grave in the middle of a sweltering day in June for their last dance.
I like to imagine the sun is on my side and it battles every particle by singeing it, melting it,
blasting it into yet finer particles where the dust becomes blankets on the leaves of trees so they don't get burnt...because they are so tender and beautiful.  The very leaves that canopy over my fair skin and squinting eyes as I encourage the sun to do its job, knowing there is a fine line between what is inexplicably lovely and harmful.

Monday

"Your life. Love it.

From the hurt to the wonder.

From the bone to the flower.

Love it. With everything you've got.

It's yours."

Life is amazing, after all.  Even when things don't go as expected I have learned to be grounded in appreciation and accepting of what I can't change.  Some days it's difficult to not be a cynic, but if I think about the ways I have been blessed, I know there is much greater joy to be had camping out in that mindset.  I'm in the third week of my summer break from school and each summer I have the best intentions of indulging in favorite pastimes (reading, writing, cooking, gardening) - activities that don't center on managing/teaching 170 mind-boggling teenagers getting ready for college or a career, and yet I always struggle with prioritizing home projects and balancing necessary summer self-care.  There's so much to do in a short amount of time that on most days I don't know where to start.  So, I'm choosing to start here, for now.  Morning coffee in hand.  A list of self care essentials (because if I don't take care of me, I can't effectively and joyfully take care of others), a list of general, daily home needs, and at least two things I really want to accomplish today.  Time is everything. No matter how productive I am, it passes freely.  And all of this, I realize, is such a blessing.  To have summers off. To be aware.  To plan. To cultivate.  To love. To live.

Still breathing

Inhale.  It's been a long while since I've been here. So many changes have occurred. With life. With love. With myself. With everything around me. Most of my posted links on this blog have sat dormant like my own.  I'm not surprised.  Exhale. I've come to believe that change, while it's the most constant in life, is for the most part always good - simply because it involves awareness, growth, acceptance, humility, and the development of humor (mostly of self) - and appreciation.  I am filled with appreciation each and everyday. I love the people in my life, in all of their unique and quirky ways, and I appreciate them so much.  Never have I been so reminded of the value of each day than to sit a while with someone and have a quality conversation, something so simple, and yet so rare these days. The stories that surface...the bits and pieces that hint at reservations or celebrations. There is just so much hidden treasure in each person whether it be through topics divulged/discussed or purely through observation.  I'm working at slowing these days down enough to have more conversations with people whether I know them or not.  It's challenging.  I'm not wired to be so affable when I'm out and about because I have an agenda that involves getting business taken care of, and yet I know I am blessed by these exchanges.  So, here is a good place to start. Again. To appreciate. To breathe patiently. To share. To be.

I love this picture.  Even though this little family of geese ended up here in this parking lot haphazardly, there's a level of joy to be had by slowing down enough to watch them for a little while. In life, it really is the small things that become the most meaningful. Observations and conversations, and the ensuing thoughts and considerations that inspire who we are (or who we are not yet).

breathe deep

Refining myself daily from the inside out...

Feeling blessed by the simple things:

sunshine

laughter

love

Sweet beautiful life.

mini water garden

I put together a little water garden container for my front patio. It is currently hosting two goldfish and an algae eater. If I can just get Jack to stop drinking from it when he dashes out the front door, it might stand a chance.

meet Jack

I've been busy.

Not because I'm semi-unemployed for the summer, but because I've acquired an extra dog. This is Jack. I've come to think of this picture as more of a mugshot, because he is most definitely a criminal canine. He just turned 1 year old. Technically, he is my daughter's dog. Last November she bought a house and was convinced she needed a watch dog - a single girl living alone and all. Then...her job at the time required her to work the night shift, often a 24-hour shift (she worked for an ambulance company). Well, we all know you can't leave a puppy alone all night in a new house. So he ended up at my house. We have a love/hate relationship. He's eaten the screens off of most of my windows in the back yard. He's broken nearly every plant pot he can reach. He's dug holes big enough to tempt me to see if he fits in them. He has chewed up my garden hose, bit a hole in the bottom of a very large bag of potting soil...and then carried it around the yard until it was empty. He has eaten my broom, the dustpan, one pair of sandals, and pulled the stuffing out of his bed. He does, however, patrol my house and report any suspicious behavior. He growls at my strange neighbor - confirming what I thought all along, and he plays with Lacey (MY dog), which I think helps keep her a little younger. While he does get sent to the penalty box nearly every day, he's kind of growing on me. He's recently developed THAT look. The look that says "You know I'm adorable." You know what look I'm talkin' about? Husbands know it. Kids know it...and apparently so does Jack. He melts my heart nearly as fast as he can chew the legs off of a lawn chair. Did I mention that his habits recently cost him a vet visit? Yep. Pancreatitis. $317.00 to tell us he eats weird stuff.

engaged

My son Erik and my future daughter-in-law Susanna.

"There is no remedy for love but to love more."

~ David Henry Thoreau

We are all very excited about this wedding.

Erik and Susanna are such a perfect match.

Beautiful.

Inspirational.

Faithful.

Blessed.

...and very, very loved.

September 3, 2011

days in July

I still love my morning coffee.

Life is full of changes,

but some things never do.

My joys of lately ~

Sweet friends

Happy kids

Tail-waggin' dogs

A crystal clear pool

Fresh tomatoes from the garden

and

preparing for a very special

wedding in September.

may 20

March 4th

Hope is that thing with feathers

that perches in the soul

and sings the tune without the words

and never stops... at all.

~Emily Dickinson