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The only vampire who matters to me lives on Sesame Street. The rest don't count.
Dead Pan Nick
181.6K posts
Dead Pan Nick
@Contwixt
24/7/365 Observer. Frequent participant. Occasional make-happener. Clouds.
- do you know how lucky we are that skunks are generally reasonable
- I have always been suspicious of Wendy's hamburgers because they are square; much unlike the round hamburgers one finds in nature.
- Lately I go to the restroom at the movies, but forget where I'm seated then return & just begin a new life in a new seat with a new family.
- One day you're not old and the next day you have a favorite grocery store.
- Just went to the water fountain at this IKEA, only to find 2 hydrogen fountains and an oxygen fountain.
- Twitter is hardcore porn for thought addicts.
- I have a hunch many of us are not the preferred sibling.
- Be nice or I'm gonna write a poem.
- Missed Connection: I was on the Ferris Wheel. You were operating the Ferris Wheel. I'm still on the Ferris Wheel.
- I've opened a can of worms. They just sit there, the worms. Hardly the chaos that's been advertised.
- When I said you "fight like a girl" I meant you were multiple moves ahead of me in your thinking and clearly had anticipated my responses.
- Relationship status: Just pulled out another batch of ceramic cats from the kiln.
- "I can't feel my legs" --mermaids
