Log inSign up
Mitya
6,525 posts
Image
user avatar
Mitya
@Discollaborator
i'm on a quest
the woods
Joined September 2020
497
Following
14.3K
Followers
  • Pinned
    user avatar
    Mitya
    @Discollaborator
    May 27
    I don't see why we can't be shells of our former selves and still have some fun
    1.4K
  • user avatar
    Mitya
    @Discollaborator
    Jan 16, 2025
    All the apartments around me are empty. They blast fake ambience from speakers to try and convince me I have neighbors, but I caught them, I noticed the loop. The same woman crying every night. 1am. An hour of that, then silence. That's when they reset it. I don't deserve this.
    12M
  • user avatar
    Mitya
    @Discollaborator
    Feb 19, 2025
    I could never trust a mycologist. Too much spore exposure. Oh, mushrooms are a "crucial part of various ecosystems" are they? Or is that the mold talking?
    1.8M
  • user avatar
    Mitya
    @Discollaborator
    Sep 7, 2025
    My landlord said I can't have a cat, so I bought a box of five hundred live house centipedes instead. Turns out he's not happy about that, either. Well tough. This is called compromise. We're compromising now. All five hundred and two of us.
    1.1M
  • user avatar
    Mitya
    @Discollaborator
    Aug 25, 2024
    I don't want to touch screens anymore, I hate it. I want dials, knobs, levers. Maybe even some cranks. Big chunky buttons. What's wrong with us? Why did we do this to ourselves?
    1.8M
  • user avatar
    Mitya
    @Discollaborator
    Sep 17, 2024
    Think I might cut myself off from all human contact and then start resenting everyone for my loneliness. Just see where that takes me.
    1.4M
  • user avatar
    Mitya
    @Discollaborator
    Dec 11, 2024
    Got a new sword that glows when enemies are nearby. Thing is, it hasn't stopped glowing since I bought it. All day, all night, thing just doesn't shut off. Took it out to the middle of a field, just to be sure there was nothing else around. Nope. Just me. Thing must be broken.
    846K
  • user avatar
    Mitya
    @Discollaborator
    Feb 27, 2025
    I'm not "freaking out". Can't you see how unnaturally still and silent I am? Could someone who was "freaking out" be this rigid? This uncomfortably quiet? Yeah, didn't think so.
    1.1M
  • user avatar
    Mitya
    @Discollaborator
    Apr 18, 2025
    Dying on a cross and telling everyone it's because they suck so bad but I don't mind, I'm happy to do it, it's fine
    845K
  • user avatar
    Mitya
    @Discollaborator
    Jul 10, 2025
    Nobody talks about how scary being a home invader is. It's so quiet and dark, and you never know what could be lurking around each corner.
    1.6M
  • user avatar
    Mitya
    @Discollaborator
    Mar 4, 2025
    Yeah they're called the mountain goats, but it's really just one guy. He knows three chords and six trillion bible verses. His songs are all about breakups or drug addiction and he always sounds like he started singing on accident and isn't sure how to stop. He's my favorite guy.
    734K
  • user avatar
    Mitya
    @Discollaborator
    Jan 16, 2025
    I didn't do anything wrong. You're trying to blame me but I'm innocent and the things you're doing are disgusting and they'll catch you eventually.
    1.1M
  • user avatar
    Mitya
    @Discollaborator
    Apr 13, 2024
    Finally overcame the odds and got a chocolate frosty from wendys, but they told me they only had "baby sized" cups left. "But that's probably perfect for you, huh?" Cried all the way home. Was way too upset to enjoy it at all.
    A "baby sized" chocolate frosty, in a normal sized vanilla hand
    768K
  • user avatar
    Mitya
    @Discollaborator
    Jul 4, 2025
    The city was a hot, heaving mass of flame. It burned breathily as perky sparks flicked across its generous breadth. "By the sweat slicked bosom of the mother goddess, will the relentless pounding of our poor city ever cease?" Breastica bemoaned sulkily. And an orc was there, too.
    315K

New to X?

Sign up now to get your own personalized timeline!

Create account

By signing up, you agree to the Terms of Service and Privacy Policy, including Cookie Use.

Terms·Privacy·Cookies·Accessibility·Ads Info·© 2026 X Corp.
Don't miss what's happening
People on X are the first to know.
Log inSign up
Advertisement
Advertisement