Just remembering when I held a melon and dipped my hand in custard to make it look like the World Cup, tweeted it, and got zero likes or interactions..
Paul Newman
78.3K posts
Paul Newman
@JasonKingHQ
Oh God, do I really write some crap in here? Err.... Im obviously cool, im bloody handsome, and you better fucking love me.
Joined February 2012
- I was so up for the Your Party thing, but they made such a fucking hash of it, while at the same time Zack Polanski appeared from nowhere and started smashing it. Jezza and Zara have missed the boat. I think they need to stand down and get onboard with the Greens. Discuss.
- Where's the fuck is the celebrity outrage over Gaza. Where the fuck is Geldof. Where's Bono. Where's Thom Yorke, Stephen Fry, Dylan, Palin, Peter Gabriel, Damon Albarn. What a fucking shitshow. Where are all the put your money where your mouth is fuckers when you need them.
- I wouldn't say she's eccentric, but my daughter made me a Father's Day card from two lumps of wood and a hinge..
- I love that McEnroe keeps making a fuss of Sue Barker. It's so beautiful 😭
- You forget what a tune Common People is, but then you see Jarvis kicking the arse out of it, live, at Glastonbury, and the power of it, and the rage, just blows you away. Pulp were magnificent.
- I'm in this cool cave restaurant built into the side of a cliff on the Amalfi coast..
- She's looked after us all these years, and now she's leaving us, and Wimbledon won't ever be the same. Sue Barker, the nation's sweetheart..
- Aww, mate. Steve Wright in the Afternoon was the glue that kept this country together. In cars and in kitchens, in newsagents and in warehouses. Steve was our comfort blanket, he made us happy, and his voice just made everything seem better. What a legend. RIP Steve Wright
- Just watched An Audience With Billy Connolly. Kept pausing it and stuff, so I could write a list of all the celebs in the audience. The result is probably the most mindblowing and important tweet I've ever done..
- When I was about 12 the BBC showed an Elvis film every morning during the school summer holidays, and I fucking loved them. Now I'm about 60, and I'm watching Blue Hawaii on BBC2, and it's absolutely shit.
- George Michael giving all the royalties from Last Christmas to Band Aid, when he was just 21, and his career wasn't really a done deal yet, it tells you everything you need to know about him.
- Other half's a teacher, in a school of about 100 teachers. They usually have 3 or 4 leave at the end of each year. Yesterday she found out 26 are leaving. They've had enough.
- I always get a bit emotional when this old lady changes her seasonal porch window display. Anyway, tis my great honour to declare Autumn now open..
