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kaitlin olson
@KaitlinOlson
two guys' mom.
los angeles
Joined October 2009
Posts
  • Pinned
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    I don’t know which one of you had the audacity to make this, but next time AT LEAST INCLUDE MY LASHES, YOU SON OF A BITCH.
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    Thank you. Just practicing my Emmy acceptance speech fifteen years in advance.
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    FLIP, FLIP, FLIPADELPHIA! ☀️🔔
    Never has the title of a television show been more true. 😎 🇺🇸 #philly
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    It was me who had the affair. But it was not with someone from Wales. It was with a whale. I’ve always loved whales. They’re the bosses of the ocean and I’m attracted to power. We ask for privacy as we navigate this difficult time. 🐳💦
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    I’m available for consultation
    Uh oh! Does anyone know how to make me big Big Bird again?
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    Super Bowl-bound Eagles!!!!
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    Flat takeaway, no extension on the follow through, left knee bend reduced power and the hips didnt finish like we discussed. But other than that it’s beautiful 💥
    Thanks for having me @PGATOUR! How’s my swing @Maxhoma 🏌🏻‍♂️
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    00:00
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    My six year old: Mommy, can I say a swear? Me: Sure, why don’t you whisper it to me. Him, whispering: Actually it’s a question. When someone says ‘goddamn asshole’, is it h-o-l-e, or w-h-o-l-e?
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    Goddamnit, Elizabeth might be funnier than me.
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    Me too Glenn. Me too.
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    I have been canceled by Fox.