Pinned
a piece of my roomba broke off and it vacuumed it up. self sucking little freak
meeka
7,001 posts
meeka
@MeekyBlinders
the girl with the trogdor tattoo
atl
Joined February 2010
- just said "women be shopping" and my boyfriend replied "lyndon b johnson"
- sometimes I wonder if my brother has autism but then I remember that one time he showed me his spreadsheet of all his friends that would calculate when he needed to hang out with them/text them in order to maintain a friendship
- he just called me asking why I'm not answering his texts...today I learned my dad has been texting the wrong number for me for 10 years
- my dad just told me he's going to pull a prank by "acting completely normal" at my brother's wedding
- my dad just called me to tell me he's at a concrete convention called concrete world and when I asked what he was doing there he said "learning about concrete"
- you either have a gay cousin or you are the gay cousin
- i always leave my friends voicemails in case they suddenly decide to be a musician and need an interlude
- my ex and i don’t share custody of our pets but we do let them visit each other because they love each other so much
- A babysitter allowed our 4 year old to eat 55 burgers, 55 fries, 55 tacos, 55 pies, 55 cokes, 100 tater tots, 100 pizzas, 100 tenders, 100 meatballs, 100 coffees, 55 wings, 55 shakes, 55 pancakes, 55 pastas, 55 peppers, and 155 taters
- i'm free february 13th btw (national crab rangoon day)
