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me passing someone: u slow bitch
me being passed: ok speed racer
the hype
37.3K posts
the hype
@TheHyyyype
i tweet and delete a lot of bad posts.
creator (lol) of @hyyyypehoops
- you want me to drink water. the thing that killed jack in titanic
- interviewer: why do you want this job? me: i'm a job guy. love jobs
- How I Bought A $1 Million Home At The Age Of 29: - cut out all non-essential spending - invested every dollar i could - my grandpa is steven p. walmart - did some great negotiating
- waiter: i'm sorry sir, but your card has been declined me: run it again waiter: i ran it three times me: *to my date* omg this is so embarrassing. do you mind taking care of it? her: no problem! *grabs waiter by the collar and pulls him close* he said run it again
- batman: what? riddler: i said, you have 6 chances to guess this 5-letter word or the city gets it
- guy inventing chess: this is an allegory for the medieval system of monarchy guy inventing checkers: hoppity hop, hop hop hop
- getting honked at: are u kidding me honking at someone: are u kidding me
- surgeon: we're only allowing family right now olive garden waitstaff: yeah that's why we're here
- my 2-year-old just said "daddy why don't these people understand that getting banned by a private technology platform is not an assault on one's 1st amendment rights since it does not constitute punishment of speech by the government" and i was blown away
- timothee chalamet is the tom cruise of michael ceras
- the masculine urge to tap all four pockets to make sure you have everything before you leave the house
- the concept of a boss is so funny to me. like, you're a full grown adult, but there's this other dude who tells you what to do and gives you little punishments if you don't do it how he likes. sounds made up
