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Until proven otherwise, I am declaring myself the creator of the largest Rice Krispie square in Canada.
Tristin Hopper
76.9K posts
Tristin Hopper
@TristinHopper
Columnist and reporter at National Post, Canada's only newspaper. Most influential person of Canada. Canada moral leader. Beloved Canadian role model
Victoria
Joined January 2011
- One time in elementary school we had a delegation of visiting Japanese students and during an assembly I asked "what year is it in Japan?" As my classmates hurled abuse at me that it was obviously the same year as in Canada, one of the Japanese students said it was "Emperor 6"
- Replying to @TristinHopperI've been chasing that high ever since.
- In what may be the greatest idea I've ever had, I successfully pulled off an all-Simpsons-themed dinner party.
- "I'll just sign this Magna Carta thing. What's the worst that could happen?" 800 years later ...En route to Cardiff today to celebrate seaweed innovation! Ar y ffordd i Gaerdydd i ddathlu arloesedd mewn gwymon!
- I drop off the kid at school and *every single* teacher is wearing a giant button with their pronouns on it. Let's be clear what this is: This is indoctrinating children with the lie that someone's sex is a mysterious, ethereal thing that can only be revealed via written badges.
- Replying to @OrangeJucheSlightly smug in my obviously superior calendar.
- Replying to @BunjiKugashira1See, if you went to my elementary school, you would have known from age six.
- Few times in history has a country kicked so much ass for the singular purpose of being left alone.
- Again, I don't want to oversimplify, but ... CANADIAN VOTER UNDER 40: "Maybe if this election changes the status quo I'll be able to afford having a child before I die alone in a rental unit somewhere." CANADIAN VOTER OVER 40: "Elbows up."
- I say this regularly, but the first person to be murdered by a sex robot is already among us, blissfully unaware of the hand they will be dealt by history.Age-restricted adult content. This content might not be appropriate for people under 18 years old. To view this media, you’ll need to log in to X. Learn more
- Can I tell you a secret? On October 7, 2023 I thought mosques across Canada would be posting "not in our name" signs in their windows and holding friendship events with the nearest synagogue. One of the dumbest and most naive thoughts I've ever held and I've never been the same.I sincerely want to tell you this is wholly unrepresentative of the Canadian Islamic community, but if you look for a Canadian Muslim organization speaking out against this insanity you will not find it. The exact opposite, usually.
- Probably the most morally bankrupt thing I've ever seen a prime minister do. Extending sovereignty to the worst people in the world, and a movement that has brought hate to Canada unlike anything in our history. I can't frame this as anything but evil.
