[Look Zelien! A shock of red on the network, as Lloyd’s finally fixed his stupid jacket and is proud enough of his accomplishment to wear it despite it being 95° and humid. But that’s not why he’s turned his watch on today; he’s got his game face on – or some approximation thereof.]

So these… rift things. They’re the same things that appeared a while back, right? Before we were all taken to that Salem’s Lot place. Does it… always mean the same thing? Are we gonna get taken off to some crazy place all over again?

[This, folks, is an example of someone asking a question they already know the answer to. He presses on anyway.]

… I dunno if we’ll have to go through that this time, or if it means winding up in that stupid village again. But we’ll be fine so long as we focus on keeping each other safe. Besides, if it’s the same place, we’ll know what to look out for! [He starts listing everything on his fingers as he speaks:] We should be able to avoid a lot of trouble if we stay away from that huge inn; I think it did some weird stuff to people. If you arrive in the mist, try to find someone to travel with. I remember hearing that the sewers were bad, I think there was some kind of creepy mill that had monsters in it, and there was some lady who turned into a giant monster rat…

[Oops. He’s probably not supposed to talk about that.] That is, uhhh… oh! Avoid these huge metal things called “cars!” They’re really dangerous and can’t be killed!

[For real, dog. COMPASS comes up with the craziest things.] I’m sure there was a lot of other stuff to avoid there, too, but so long as we continue working together, I think we can handle anything COMPASS throws at us. We’ll be ready this time.