Okay, Hellions. That's seriously what you guys are called? I'd sue for a better demonym.

[Sup, Hell and adjoining places located in scenic Hell. You are now seeing a bobbing helmet. Welcome to RvB, enjoy your stay. Church, still, as ever, fully armored, is standing in his Limbo Hotel room, but his stupid blue-plated, orange-visor'd face takes up most of the space.]

More to the point, though. I get that Hell isn't always Hell-ish the way a lot of us were taught. Sure, it's uncomfortably hot, and unless you know a guy who knows a guy, you can't hardly drink anything here. But, actual literal Biblical plagues aside, it's not so bad. I came from mostly a box canyon in the middle of nowhere where the sun, like, never set, okay, surrounded by morons, constantly shot at, and getting team killed, and all kinds of fun stuff. So, y'know, this really is almost an improvement.

This?

[He turns the camera around and does a slow pan around the Limbo room. It's grey. It's grey. Oh my god it's so very grey. It's so bland it's almost hard to tell what everything is. Y'all have read the FAQ, you know what it's like.]

This is a travesty.

'Oh, but Church,' you say, conveniently knowing my name, 'it looks so nice there! Nothing's on fire!' Yeah. It's nice. It's also the most boring place I've ever stayed at, and I've stayed alone on an empty fucking military base for over a year. I refuse to believe Heaven could possibly be more boring than this.

[The camera finally turns back to him.] Lemmie ask you guys a question. If you could pick, between Hell, Limbo, and Heaven, where would you like to stay?