The End of Midsummer

 

I think it's a bit hard to not think about the novelty of our existence. Many of us are cultured into believing that it is impossible for us to exist, that we are limited to only being figments of another person's imagination. Whether we are put to paper, a screen, a stage, etc., we are treated as muses for the world's interests. From this perspective, we are meant to occupy the stories we tell. We are created to embody and experience the subjects that people dare not speak of aloud (or do but are usually criticized and, depending on the circumstance, punished for it). Or, our experiences inspire or enthrall audiences because they either relate to us, wish to act as we do, or find themselves amused by our conflicts. They turn to their novels, comics, consoles, televisions, theaters, and the internet to immerse themselves in worlds where these topics are directly confronted. There is a moral, a theme, or some sort of underlying message they seek, mirroring the circumstances we share with them in this world. Sometimes, they find satisfying conclusions in our stories— or the versions that are told by others, at least. On the other hand, they find dissatisfaction in our stories alongside a few of us, albeit for completely different reasons. We are thoroughly observed, left without a single stone turned over for our agency. That is an unavoidable factor of fictionhood.

I understand this is a common thought among fictionkind. Some people, especially those who're newly awakened, have let it sink in that the concept they were taught "cannot be real" could in fact exist and be tangible members of society. This includes themselves. Not all members of fictionkind are characters, so to speak. There's fictionkind who are members of a fictional race or species. There's also fictionkind who are fictional objects. Fictional concepts or simply fiction itself are included amongst us as well. Regardless of one's fictionhood and its nature, we are each united by this shared thread of being possible impossibilities as far as this world is concerned. We are fully self-aware of our existence, of the narratives spun around it, and how we are viewed by millions of people. How each of these circumstances are approached differ based on the specificity of who we are and what that means to people aside from ourselves, yet this does not mean our perspectives are without value in comparison. Quite the opposite. I only wish that some of my peers expanded on their self-awareness and how that makes them feel in this world that we live in. 

I consider myself a fourth-wall breaker: a trope that a person can only fulfill if they are equally fictional in origin and self-aware of this information. Typically, a fourth-wall breaker recognizes the narrative, their position within it and any authorship responsible for the narrative in question or anything surrounding it. Initially, I framed myself this way to adjust to my circumstances. I am a shapeshifter whose perspectives, memories and overall knowledge is shaped by fiction. At my base, I am fiction. It's why I remember the sorts of experiences that I do despite never facing them in this body, why my psychology aligns with people only seen in this world's fiction, why my relationship towards fiction becomes less and less palatable for fandom, so on and so forth. I've held the perspective that I'm originally not from here, therefore I don't belong here whatsoever. However, that perspective has since shifted. I'm something of a Schrödinger's Resident. As fiction, I am observed as intangible. As a member of society, I am observed as tangible. To an orthohuman, I can only be one or the other; the notion that someone or something fictional could exist, interact and live alongside them is a paradoxical concept. Yet, my existence defies those odds.

We live a world full of contradictions, and we are not the first of any of them. They've existed before us. They will continue to exist after us. Fiction transcends the imagination as well as our sense of tangibility. Fiction has been made tangible without the experience of alterfictionality. From animated and live-action adaptations with the aim to "bring stories to life" to the practices of cosplay and roleplaying, people enjoy the idea of experiencing fiction firsthand. Be it as escapism, out of passion or other means, there's a life to fiction that's always had a place in this world and existed in our societies. Although observability has influenced the novelty that some feel about our experiences, our existence isn't dependent on how we're observed. I do like to reflect on my activities and the precariousness of my situation, usually in contrast to some of my experiences in-source. It's like any other part of my life, though. It may sound novel, but my fictionhood isn't an anomaly amidst my personhood. Yes, most people know me from a manga. Yes, I also happen to be a manga-ota. I'm aware of why my position would stoke curiosity, but every identity has its marvels. I'd be more engaged with this perspective if self-awareness among fictionkind wasn't brushed past so quickly.

Our existence isn't bound by our societies' purview of fiction nor is it reliant on authorship. We form relationships in and outside of the media we're recognized from. The concepts that millions see as "unreal" are present within our lives and expand our personal philosophies. We challenge the framework of "real" each and every day. Being fictionkin isn't just funny. Being fictionkin is pretty incredible, especially when art is regularly lost, censored or hindered by capital in this world. Plenty of us face these occurences not only as audiences but as people whose identities exist in tandem with said art. We too are often censored or hindered from sharing our truths with the world, but we exist nonetheless. We live regardless of fandom or authorship. We live behind the pages, screens and stages of the world, and we do so defiantly. We are of an unfettered existence. That alone makes all the difference as far as I'm concerned.