The Cat's Lair: dancing fey in the face of chronic illness

I had a birthday on Friday. I turned 29. It's not one of the big milestones, but still, it led to a lot of thinking and pondering and panicking about ages and growing up and how I don't feel grown up and still get Duzt (informal you for youth under 16) and stuff with my Team.

It was an okay birthday. My guardian came in the morning and took me out for coffee and apple strudel and brought me a nifty case for my new smartphone so I can hold it better. My physio gave me tons of hugs and well-wishes. I baked a cake. My friend Lisa came by and brought me tea and a scented candle and ate cake with me. Christian and Aleks sent messages. Bianka rang and wished me well and got cake later that evening when we went to a board game event that was okay.

In internet people, trialia, cyrano, and petersmam wished me well. Thanks, you guys!

Bianka has another spoonie friend, Maria, who has MS. Maria and I live normally, budget money, go grocery shopping, cook as spoons allow, generally eat at home, and make do on our disability monies. And it works. We're not rolling in the monies, but we come clear each month unless there's an emergency.

Bianka has a disability pension as well, more than either of us, but she lives totally differently than we do. She eats out every day, never cooks, never has food in the house, has breakfast out, dinner out, tea out, plus snacks and coffee, and spends easily 20-30€ a day on food-related expenses. Of course, a disability pension is not built to deal with this, so she works illegally (which she can, she's not technically a spoonie at all) and earns a lot of money. But she has a gambling habit, and thus most of her money vanishes regularly into the casino and so she is always in a panic, borrowing money from friends, never coming clear in a month. All suggestions to lead a less expensive lifestyle are vehemently shoved off.

SO. Bianka got it into her head that Maria and I, being so poor, needed help with foodstuffs, and should go with her to a sort of food bank where they don't check that you qualify or live in that area and, according to Bianka, had "quality foodstuffs" and it was "not far to go", just a tram and a bit. So Maria and I decided to humour her, after she bugged us for weeks, and said we'd go.

Turned out, after I took the train and the underground to meet them at the tram stop, it was at the very end of the tram stop, and then a bus into the middle of nowhere, and then "10 minutes walk". Well, 10 minutes for Bianka at top-speed. It was half an hour for me and Maria at a good clip. And the bus didn't go very often. Bianka had checked the return times and insisted that we would make it because if we didn't, there would be a few hours' wait to get back.

So we get there, and yeah, right "quality" foodstuffs. It was worse quality than the Tafel and they can be pushing it in quality. There was nothing I trusted to take home for fear it would rot before I ate it. Maria took a few carrots for her bunnies, but also nothing for herself. And Bianka spent the whole time on her mobile arranging another job. Maria and I were starting to get rather annoyed with Bianka especially since we had to get back and we had missed one bus already, but Bianka assured us there was another bus. Famous last words

A nice lady working there gave Maria and me a ride back the "10 minute walk" to the bus stop because neither of us was really able to walk anymore - my left hip was coming out again, and Maria was simply exhausted - and Bianka waslked the route in about 7 minutes. Then we were at the bus stop and Bianka was insisting that another bus would come in about 30 minutes. Maria and I decided to look for ourselves just in case and guess what? NO BUS. NOT UNTIL 5 PM. Bianka had looked for weekdays instead of Saturday. We were stuck.

Maria was getting worried, Bianka was convinced we could just hitchhike (which my guardian told me I shouldn't do and I wouldn't want to do anyway), when I remembered I had a central taxi number Germany-wide in my mobile. I rang them, got a taxi out to us, and got us to the tram station. It cost 21€ to rescue us. Divided by 3 that's 7€, which is a lot of money for a supposedly "free" outing. I could have done something nice with those seven euros.

Maria paid me back as soon as we were at the tram station, but Bianka, whose fault it was that we even had to take the taxi, weaseled out and told me she'd get around to it at some point. GRRRRRRRRRR. She better not think she can "forget" to pay me back. That was the money for this coming week I used for the taxi. I need that money for shampoo and mouthguard cleanser.

Bianka raced off to her job once we got into the city and Maria and I bitched a bit before saying good-bye and heading off. I slept 4 hours once I got home from stress and exhaustion and over-doing things.

Today is a taking-things-easy day in pyjamas with lots of resting and reading and plans for a tasty meal tonight. Boiled Rice with Parmsan, Mozzarella, and Bail with fresh basil and real buffalo mozzarella, yum! I'm enjoying food more again now that my cold is almost gone. Just a little bit of congestion left in the chest, but I'm getting it out.