schemingreader

I saw this meme on florahart's journal and I thought, "Well, I haven't written that many new fics lately, but the last two were in formal verse and putting them into the Translation Party program could be trippy." This is a webpage that uses Google software to translate lines of English into Japanese and then back to English and then back to Japanese--until the program attains equilibrium. Some kinds of phrases make it freak out, though. Anyway, here goes:

1. Harry Potter and the Magic Mountain (Crossover ficlet/meta/thingie, PG-13 at most)
First line: If only all the characters in my books
Could meet and talk about their plotted lives.
Only if you meet all aspects of these characters and graphics, the story of my life.
Neat!

2. A Little Death (Snarry, Hard R to NC-17)
First line:Spenserian stanzas aren't the same verse form
As Eliyahu Levita once chose
To write the tale of Buovo, to perform
A cultural translation, one that rose
To levels unattainable by prose.
1 2 3 Spencer Buovo Eriyafurevita 1 in a single instruction since 1804, one of one of two conditions: 111111111 Sennai development level and two conditions: one of two statements in one of two stanzas of two forms: two conditions for KANO : one two three paintings in one standard, one by one poem, one story line, one or two of one tame one, one that can be written to convert a single one option open Masu.
It is doubtful that this phrase will ever reach equilibrium.

I BROKE IT! I decided to try the second line!
Second line:There's nothing like a great enduring work Of Yiddish writing.
Great job forever, or write in Yiddish.


3. The Awakening
First line:It was not easy to get a divorce in Wizarding Britain.
This is a witch divorce, the UK has been difficult.

You might think this is a boring first line, especially for a fic with so many hot sex scenes if I do say so myself, but the program did something interesting with it.

4. Stages of Courtship
First line:Courting Severus Snape was not going to be easy. He was both deeply in the closet and constitutionally inimical to teasing, so Remus couldn't flirt with him in any of the ways he liked to do.
The court simply did not think Seburususuneipu. Please me. In addition, teachers Kurozettoromurusu Nevertheless, by law, its depth is the Constitution.
This one had some amazingly great versions along the way. The program told me "Shame on you, by the way." Ha!

5. Daydream Charm
First line:Severus shut the door to his rooms. It had been an utterly shit day, again, and in an hours time he'd have to be at dinner, and after that--didn't bear consideration.
Severus shut down the door to his room. Again, the date, the date and time is completely nonsense, he is after dinner, I can not pay attention to them - I think it was.

6. Looking Like Our Parents (ficlet is part of a longer narrative arc)
First line:Harry woke up not sure where he was. He'd been having another dream about someone he loved getting killed.
I woke up Harry's eyes open. He was working on getting the death of another dream.
(the program told me "That's deep, man.")

7. Ron's View (Same series, earlier installment, sorry)
First line:Ron was getting drunk. Harry had never seen him do it so deliberately.
Ron was drunk. Harry had never seen him deliberately.
This was one that the program said "It is doubtful this phrase will ever achieve equilibrium." Isn't that odd?

8. Never Mind the Manoeuvres (Yuletide fic, Aubrey/Maturin, NC-17)
First line:"Are you much repelled, Stephen?"
"You too, when Stephen resilient?"
Eh?

9. Try to See It Snarry, NC-17, part of the longer series. (Gosh, these had boring first lines, sorry!)
First line:
He was dreaming about Professor Snape's death again. "No," he said. "No."
He was dreaming again about the death of Professor Severus. "No," he said. "No."
Another judged unlikely to reach equilibrium. Notice that they have the professor's first name.

10. (I skipped, because this one had a better result!) Resurrection (Severitus, PG13)
First line:"I'm not your son!" Harry Potter rose to his feet and upended his teacup on the floor of the headmaster's office.
"I am your son," Harry Potter legs open, upended his bowl on the floor of the principal's office.
Whoa! That's quite...disturbing.