Commencement Speech - You Are Not Special

Be careful what you hear. We tend to selectively hear only things that validate our opinion and sense of liking. We like to hear messages that tickle our ears, telling us that we deserve it, we are strong, and we are special. Aren't we the contender? Imagine that you are one out of the millions sperms that being dispensed, and you're the one who swim victoriously towards the egg? But hey, listen more carefully please: there are 6.8 billions sperm that manage to do that too, and more are following. That is why when one commencement speaker states that we are not special, the whole world throws a tantrum and gasp in disbelief.

How could he? 

How dare he? 

Yes, what rarely said and often only heard in a faint whisper is the line after that: how could he tell that disturbing truth that soon? How dare he shatter the beautiful yet misconstrued pictures that we have been constructing for this little child - that he is the most special and that the world revolve around him?

This speech is an appropriate wake up call not only for these children, but also for all of us. Listen to what David McCullough Jr, an English speaker from Wellesley High School has to say during this commencement speech. 

Here are some of my favorites:

'Yes, you've been pampered, cosseted, doted upon, helmeted, bubble-wrapped. Yes, capable adults with other things to do have held you, kissed you, fed you, wiped your mouth, wiped your bottom, trained you, taught you, tutored you, coached you, listened to you, counseled you, encouraged you, consoled you and encouraged you again. You've been nudged, cajoled, wheedled and implored. You've been feted and fawned over and called sweetie pie. Yes, you have. And, certainly, we've been to your games, your plays, your recitals, your science fairs. Absolutely, smiles ignite when you walk into a room, and hundreds gasp with delight at your tweet. ... And now you've conquered high school ... and, indisputably, here we all have gathered for you, the pride and joy of this fine community ...

But do not get the idea you're anything special. Because you're not.'

'Your planet ... is not the center of its solar system, your solar system is not the center of its galaxy, your galaxy is not the center of the universe. In fact, astrophysicists assure us the universe has no center; therefore, you cannot be it'

'Like accolades ought to be, the fulfilled life is a consequence, a gratifying byproduct. It's what happens when you're thinking about more important things. Climb the mountain not to plant your flag, but to embrace the challenge, enjoy the air and behold the view. Climb it so you can see the world, not so the world can see you. Go to Paris to be in Paris, not to cross it off your list and congratulate yourself for being worldly. Exercise free will and creative, independent thought not for the satisfactions they will bring you, but for the good they will do others, the rest of the 6.8 billion- and those who will follow them. And then you too will discover the great and curious truth of the human experience is that selflessness is best thing you can do for yourself. The sweetest joy of life, then, come only with the recognition that you're not special. 

Because everyone is'

See this for complete transcript

Before the Morning - An Encouragement

This song has been such an encouragement for me and I hope it could be to you too. No matter how defeated or discouraged you feel, drag your heavy-heart out of the bed because in God, there is always a reason to sing. Get up and fight the good fight!!

Check out the story behind this song, super awesome - and the YouTube video.

Before the Morning - Josh Wilson

Do you wonder why you have to

Feel the things that hurt you

If there’s a God who loves you where is He now

Maybe there are things you can’t see

And all those things are happening

To bring a better ending

Someday somehow you’ll see you’ll see

Would you dare would you dare to believe

That you still have a reason to sing

Cause the pain that you’ve been feeling

It can’t compare to the joy that’s coming

So hold on you gotta wait for the light

Press on and just fight the good fight

Cause the pain that you’ve been feeling

It’s just the dark before the morning

My friend you know how this all ends

You know where you’re going

You just don’t know how you’ll get there

So say a prayer

And hold on cause there’s good for those who love God

But life is not a snapshot

It might take a little time but you’ll see the bigger picture

Once you feel the weight of glory

All your pain will fade to memory

It’s just the hurt before the healing

Oh the pain that you’ve been feeling

It’s just the dark before the morning 

"They say of some temporal suffering, "No future bliss can make up for it," not knowing that Heaven, once attained, will work backwards and turn even that agony into a glory" - C.S. Lewis

Places To Visit in Columbus - Part 2

I posted the part 1 several days ago, and here is the continuation of my visit to several unpopular but worth visiting places in Columbus. 

Franklin Conservatory - If biology is your favorite subject in high school, this is the place you don't want to miss. Showcasing various exotic plants and botanical gardens, this is a great place to learn and also to take pictures. 

Alum Creek Dam - again, a collection of the beauty of nature:  beautiful dam, green and vast pasture, clear blue sky, and the lake. Enjoy the breath-taking scenery or be active and do some kayaking, fishing or even windsurfing. 

That's all for now folks, I will post more pics if I get more chance to go around Columbus. As of now, I look forward to visiting Amish County which I haven't get the chance to visit. So, stay tune and anticipate more postings. 

Places To Visit in Columbus - Part 1

When you think about Columbus, you and maybe the other 95% of people will think about the renowned Ohio State University, which is good because that's what Columbus, OH is well-known for. However, it is unfortunate that places like Goodale Park, Hoover dam, or Hayden Falls, beside their pristine beauty, remain untouched by visiting tourists, locally or nationally or even internationally. That's what prompted this post; I've had the chance to visit these places and I truly believe that their beauty should not be overlooked. Below are some pics which I hope will convince you to visit these places right after you're done visiting Ohio State University.

Goodale Park - With its natural beauty, this park is perfect for picnicking, jogging or even for playing around with ducks. 

Santa Maria Boat - I did not go for the tour so I have no idea what this boat is all about. I'm pretty sure it has some interesting historical stuff if you're really interested. For me, this pic is enough. 

Hayden Falls - I was so close to sending this pic to several magazine editors out there. I'm sure the splendor of the Falls plays a bigger role aesthetically, but surely you can't dismiss that guy right there. 

Topiary Park - a very beautifully landscaped park, with a pond at the center of the park which provides you with a very comfortable place to chill and appreciate the art of topiary. Where's the picnic basket?

to be continued.... 

The Untypical Birthday Greetings

A typical birthday greetings, anywhere in the world, contain the platitude "have a blast" or "wish you all the best" kind of happy smiley hopeful messages. Yes, people should share happiness on that special day; birds are singing, trees are dancing, and the universe joins in that joyous chime of festivity.

However, that was not the case for my birthday this year. As I learned about my mom's malady a day before I am entering the age 23 demographic, there was really not much to be happy for. Thus, it is interesting to note how the birthday messages that I got from my friends this year deviate from the normal common greetings.

Mostly taken from The Bible, all these messages brought comfort and console to my weary and chaotic heart. They do not hope for 'my wishes to come true' nor for me to smile 'on this special day', but they do promise strength and hope during this specific times of trouble. I found these to be profound and timely, and I can't help not to share these blessings with you

2 Chron 16:9

For the eyes of the Lord range throughout the earth to strengthen those whose hearts are fully committed to him.

Isaiah 41:10

So do not fear, for I am with you. Do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

Psalm 9:9-10

The Lord is a refuge for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble. Those who know your name will trust in you, for you, Lord, have never forsaken those who seek you.

Isaiah 54:10

Though the mountains be shaken and the hills be removed, yet my unfailing love for you will not be shaken nor my covenant of peace be removed," says the Lord, who has compassion on you.

Psalm 121:1-2

I lift up my eyes to the hills - where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the maker of heaven and earth.

The Empty Pursuit of Fame

In this era of reality TV, advertisements and social medias , attention is a scarcity and people are competing ferociously for their share of fame and recognition. In the recent "balloon boy" case, parents willingly employ their own child to promote their popularity. It seems to me that people will not vacillate to legalize all means to gain fame; from performing the silliest act in "30 seconds to fame", broadcasting the daily struggle of raising eight Gosselins, and to staging a "six-year-old boy in a balloon" drama. All for the sake of winning people's wow, simply that - to bring a faint of self-worth into their bland dull life.

The need to be loved and recognized is a basic human trait; it is evident in each and every stage of humans' life. A baby hollers desperately to get his parents' attention, a high school student engineers a rebellion by failing his class, a college sophomore gets himself in a brawl to impress girls, a business owner donates his money to create media buzz. Each stage has its own weapon of choice, but the more people grow intellectually, the more insidious it becomes. Humans are innately the master of manipulation, and our boot camp starts even when we barely able to talk.

Is it wrong then to want to be recognized? I believe the answer is a resounding no. But when people will go to such length to satisfy their hunger for fame, it becomes an acute unquenchable obsession which if left untreated will start to redefine their self-esteem. And this incident simply shows what direction our current society is going: a celebrity-obsessed narcissistic culture.

That is why we are so obsessed with putting our latest pictures on Facebook, we peruse all blog posts on "getting more followers on Twitter", we have our own self-portrait or caricature, and we even Google ourselves. Yes, we want our existence to be affirmed, and we define our self-esteem based on useless opinions - how many facebook friends and twitter followers we have? How many people view our youtube video or blog?

Personally, I think we have to remember that people's opinion should never dictate our own evaluation of self-esteem. The impulse for fame will always be there, but I think we should master the art of controlling it and refuse to accept the delusion that it creates; self-worth should never be measured using a popularity contest from a bunch of unknown "voters".

I highly doubt that people will find true joy from having thousands of impersonal comments on their video. Would that really make you happy? For me, I believe that I am worth more than even millions of comments or followers, and I am just going to live my life freely without having to obsess over who's gonna like me or who's paying attention. Hey, my life is still a great drama, with or without camera around.

A Dollar a Day Keeps Happiness Away

I am who I am, not simply because of serendipity, but because of several significant experiences that shaped my belief, attitude and value. This life-changing experience that I am about to describe has helped me to realize that the pursuit of wealth and achievements does not, and never, translate into a deep sense of satisfaction.

During my senior high school (back in 2005), I went for a "live-in" program: a three nights stay in a secluded undeveloped village. The main purpose of the program is to hone our leadership skills by letting our big-city lifestyle rubs with the villagers' frugal lifestyle. There, I discovered this insight:

For sure, those people are less fortunate than most of us in so many ways; fewer money and possession, smaller chances and opportunities to earn big bucks, and lesser abilities and skills to be successful. Ironically, they have one thing that is missing in most of us: happiness.

Isn't that what matter the most? People climb the corporate ladder in hope of finding happiness at the top. People work around the clock to make sure their good performances will earn them a raise. Students work their head off to get into that billions dollar company. People do all such of things in the name of happiness.

Research has shown that the otherwise is correct and my experience confirmed it. Villagers are happier, firstly because they don't have to do things which actually make them unhappy. Isn't it an irony? In the process of pursuing happiness, we sacrifice happiness: family, friends, and health. I've heard many examples revolving around one similar pattern: loving husband putting countless hours to earn more income for his family. Halfway down the road, tension rises, house becomes cold, smiles become artificial, and relationship becomes sour.

Secondly, money never equals to happiness. Even if you manage to get rich without having to work your way up, true happiness is still out of reach. Villagers are happier living in a small house, working in a farm, and eating a meager meal.

Why?

Because they found the key to unlock the door to happiness: deep and meaningful relationships. Family sat together on the asphalt floor to enjoy their dinner. Father and son exchanged stories, mother and daughter laughed cheerfully. The conversation was seasoned with love. The atmosphere was so warm, so close, and so human. Neighbors came over for a late-night conversation over a cup of tea. Thousand stars joined in the conversation silently, and the gentle breeze spread the happiness around. A faint voice whispering inside me, "These uneducated and inconspicuous people have found it!!"

Simply stated, having less actually draws people closer. They are happier because they have less things to focus on: No worry about job security or stock market, no grudge when the discount ends, no temptation to buy new gadget etc. They simply focus on what they have: friends.

It appeals to humans' most basic nature, the need for others. Unfortunately, the pursuit of wealth often times deprives and desensitizes us from that most primal nature. Thus, it is good to strip our materialistic attributes off, and see our humanity in its naked form. Tell me if you see a pathetic and unhappy human. I saw it, thanks to the villagers.