The Lady and the Stranger

July 5, 2008. Toto's Garage. We're just about to leave. The 3 people at the table beside us are also leaving. 2 of them get out of their seats. The 3rd person remains seated, his head down. He seems tired, drunk, asleep, I can't tell. He's nodded off. The lady from our group decides to have some fun. With a nod to the stranger's friends, she sits down next to him, her shawl around him and her head on his shoulder. I immediately see, as if on cue, at least 5 people around me fish out their cameras to click pics. I do the same. Lot's of laughs all around. The stranger is oblivious to all this attention. He's still in dreamland. As we go out, I see the stranger's friends wake him up and tell him what's just happened.

I haven't met the lady or seen the stranger since that day. I wonder what they're doing now.

The Lady and the Stranger

Monsterpiece Theater Redux

The children's T.V show Sesame Street used to screen a series of sketches called Monsterpiece Theater (or Theatre) back in its heyday, which were really well-made parodies of popular literature, T.V shows, plays and films. The show's setting was itself a parody of the British Masterpiece Theatre hosted by Alistair Cooke, each episode opening with Alistair introducing a well known play, book, movie or musical.

The reason I bring this up is because I used to watch this show as a kid, and never got any of the cultural references, but after all I've learned over the last 10 years, I get them now. It's strange that you have to be an adult to fully appreciate a children's show. I wonder if there are any other examples out there? Why would the show's creators do this? Were they aiming to reinforce what they considered to be good art? To tell us kids what's good and what isn't?

I've linked to some of the sketches below. Notice how much of the humor is actually derived from lines that directly reference the original source material. Like I said, it would help if you've read or watched the stuff being spoofed to truly appreciate this.

1. Hamlet (4.46)

"It don't get classier than this" 

Mel Gibson doesn't scrimp on his acting skills as he and Elmo help explain feelings in this spoof of Hamlet.

2. Monster of Venice (3.20)

"Guess that why not called Monster of Cleveland"

A cake and balloons somewhat replace 'a pound of flesh' in this message about equality. Grover's monologue is hilarious.

3. The 39 Stairs (3.27)

"There better be something exciting at the top"

They make good use of the old-school Film noir theme in this spoof of the title of Hitchcock's The 39 Steps, based on John Buchan's book by the same name.

Notice the shadow on the wall as Grover goes up the stairs - reminiscent of Nosferatu?

4. Waiting for Elmo (2.57) 

"Why couldn't they do Oklahoma?"

Grover and Telly explore their feelings in this spoof of Samuel Beckett's Waiting for Godot.

5. Chariots of Fur (4.39)

Grover and Herry carry out the best Chariots of Fire parody ever.



6. Twin Beaks (5.24)

"Me like bird that knows own name"

The longest MT sketch, a spoof of Twin Peaks, and kind of creepy in a way that only a David Lynch product can be. Watch for multiple show references. There's an educational reference in here somewhere but I'm missing it and don't care.



7. Gone with the Wind (2.22)

"...me hear it about...the wind"

Flying sheep don't deter you from subtraction lessons in this Gone With The Wind spoof.

8. Little House on/under/in Prairie (2.18)

"You got maybe a bungalow?"

Alistair Cookie personally helps to explain prepositions in his own unique way in this spoof of Little house on the Prairie. Reminds me of Monster in a Box (below).

9. The Old Man and the C (1.41)

"That surprise ending gets me every time"

I find it apt that one of the shortest sketches in this series was a parody of one of Hemingway's shortest works.

10. Me Claudius (1.52)

One of the first Monsterpiece Theater sketches, this had no standard opening theme. It spoofed the T.V series I, Claudius, complete with something slimy crawling across a Roman mosaic. 

Other Monsterpiece Theater sketches can be found below:

Upstairs/Downstairs (4.07) - One of the first MT sketches, a parody of the British T.V show of the same name.

Ali Baba and the 40 thieves (4.20) - A sketch that never really takes off. Here's a link to the original story.

The 400 Blows (2.49) - A counting lesson spoofing the title of Francois Truffaut's film The 400 Blows.

The Taming of the Shoe (3.31) - The first of Shakespeare's works to be spoofed in this series, and a lesson on cooperation.

The King and i (1.55) - A spelling lesson probably based around the full feature musical.

The Postman Always Rings Twice (5.02) - a parody of the title of the similarly named film.

The Sound of Music (2.22) - Grover struggles with The Sound of Music.

Dr. No (3.59) - A spelling lesson based around a spoof of Ian Fleming's Dr. No.

1 Flew over the Cuckoos Nest (3.02) - This counting lesson spoofs the title of both the film & book.

Monster in a Box (2.59) - Spalding Gray's work is spoofed to discuss prepositions.

The Sun Also Rises (5.00) - A clever play on the title of Hemingway's first book provides for a basic home science lesson.

Monsters with Dirty Faces (4.32) - a black and white spoof of Angels with Dirty Faces. 

Lethal Weapon 3 (2.16) - Mel Gibson and Danny Glover reunite for a few seconds of 'danger'. 

Room at the Top (2.36) - A parody of the title of the movie. 

Inside/Outside Story (3.32) - A spoof of Westside Story. 

Conservations with my Father (5.18) - Sesame Street turns Conversations with My Father into an environmental lesson.

The Horse Whisperer (2.53) - Possibly the last sketch in this series, & possibly inspired by this film.

ABCD Blue (3.01) - NYPD Blue does the alphabet.

Anyone's Nose (2.37) - Inspired by the Anything Goes musical by Cole Porter.

Cyranose de Bergerac (4.51) - Considering that the intro is short, this spoof of Edmond Rostand's Cyrano de Bergerac play is a really long sketch.

Adding with the Fiddler (3.54) -The muppets turn a popular play into a counting lesson.

Dances With Wolves (4.38) - A bit too long, in my opinion. See the original movie if you haven't done so already.

Guys and dolls (2.41) - A musical parodying the title of this musical.

Howard's End (1.31) - The shortest MT sketch ever, parodying the title of the film and book.

Twelve Angry Men (2.01) - A parody of one of the movies, or all of them. Or the book. It's hard to say.

Little Red Riding Cookie (4.18) - A spoof of the original fairy tale.

Comments welcome.

Monsterpiece Theater Redux

#unlikelyindianbooks on Twitter

A funny thing happened yesterday. @jhunjhunwala started a trending topic on Twitter yesterday called #unlikelyindianbooks. 

The responses came flying in quickly, some witty, some obvious, but very entertaining nonetheless. I wrote over 20 tweets of my own on the topic, in addition to reading through and laughing at everyone else's tweets, starting at around 11.00 and finally logging off at a little after 1.00 to go to bed. This was a fantastic end to a work day.

Here are some of my favourites: 

@amitvarma 

"How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb" by Arundhati Roy

'A farewell to Arms' by Varun Gandhi  
'Who Moved My Cheesecake' by Adnan Sami.

'Sons and Lovers' by Kokilaben Ambani

Silicon Valley Revealed' by Rakhi Sawant & Sherlyn Chopra

'How the Parsis and Gujaratis Built Mumbai' by Raj Thackeray 

@manuscrypts 

Not a Penny more, Not a penny less by Harshad Mehta 

100 cheap places to stay in delhi - Shashi Tharoor
The Romantics - Pramod Muthalik
Built to Last - Ramalinga Raju

Winning Campaigns - Online and Offline by LK Advani

 

@krishashok 

"A dog visited his house & other short stories" by VS Achuthananthan
"The Interpreter of Melodies" by Anu Malik
"The Grapes of Rath" by LK Advani

"Creative Commentary: Kill those cliches" by ravi_shastri

@jishita 

"You Can Win" by LK Advani 

Without A Pause by A B Vajpayee

@thecomicproject

Maid in India - by Shiney Ahuja 

Lady in Red - By Simi Garewal

Employee Retention - by Hari Sadu

@notytony 

"The Pink Slip" by Pramod Muthalik 

Chicken Soup For The Indian Soul by Maneka Gandhi 

@zauq 

Citizen Rane by Bal Thakarey 

Far Away From The Madding Crowd by @BDUTT 

@ShivamVij 

"Ponytail Management For Dummies (With Free Laptop)" by Arindam Chaudhuri

"Bombay Times" by Raj Thackeray 

@shubhas

The buck stops here by Salman Khan 

size doesnt matter by Kareena Kapoor 

  

@rameshsrivats 

"Eyes wide open" by Deve Gowda

"Out of the closet" by Baba Ramdev

@ramithanda "An affair to remember " by Aishwarya Rai 

@rksatta "No country for old men" by L.K.Advani and Somnath Chatterjee 

@_samiran "Winning Excuses" by Kolkata Night Riders 

@scorpfromhell God of small things by Vijay Mallaya 

@FrazKhan A Practical Guide to Composing Original Music - Pritam & Anu Malik 

@zigzackly Bombay Meri Jaan - Raj Thackeray (with a foreword by Bal Thackeray and photographs by Udhav Thackeray) 

@AudibleArun: "No apologies!" - by Karan Johar  

@ashwinbellur 'Monk who sold his Ferrari' by Vijay Mallya

@sunilea "Six Pack" by Mohanlal

@telljeeves So nia, yet so far... by Manmohan Singh 

@phanirajkvs 'who moved my berth' by Lalu Prasad Yada

@OldmonkMGM My experiments with truth- Ramalinga Raju 

@varnam_blog "Laws of Physics" by Rajnikanth

  

@venkatananth "A step by step guide to performing Chhat Puja" by Raj Thackerey 

@SundeepDougal My Prison Diary: Ottavio Quattrochi 

And here are some of my own creations:

'Hard Cash' by Bangaru Laxman
'The Heritage of the Desert' by BARC and DRDO

'Hard Times' by Mukesh Ambani
'The Broad Highway' by NHAI & MMRDA

'The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen' by United Women Front

'The Age of Innocence' by Narendra Modi

'Pride and Prejudice' by Lalit Modi

'Comedy of Errors' by MET dept

'Kamasutra' by Pramod Muthalik

'Invisible Man' by Manmohan Singh

'Importance of Being Earnest' by Ramalinga Raju

Lonely Planet India' by the LeT

'How to Win Friends and Influence People' by Narendra Modi

'One Hundred Years of Solitude' by Arindham Choudhry & Raj Thackeray

I also had time to contribute to #likelyindianbooks:

'The Little Minister' by Pranab Mukherjee

'The Lord of the Rings' by Bappi Lahiri

'A Midsummer Night’s Dream' by Lalit Modi

'Much Ado About Nothing' by Shashi Tharoor

   

#unlikelyindianbooks on Twitter

Burglars Catch Out Paedophile

You've just gotta love this article. Police in the U.K arrest a paedophile after burglars tip them off about objectionable material on a laptop of his that they stole. The paedophile eventually gets three and a half years in prison.

The burglars sparked the investigation which brought him to justice after they stole a laptop from his house on August 19 last year.

They uncovered a more disturbing crime than their own when they found child pornography on the computer, and contacted the police.

Acting Detective Sergeant Chris Stone said: 'Whilst they were carrying out an offence themselves, it is commendable that they did the right thing and this in turn has helped bring a serious offender to justice.

I wonder if thieves have some kind of unwritten unspoken unconscious code of honour among them? Is there some kind of hierarchy of respect that exists in the criminal world? Do thieves look down on murderers, who look down on rapists, who look down on so on and so on? Or is it the other way round, do you garner more respect based on the seriousness of your crime? Either way, the paedophile's probably going to be last.

Burglars Catch Out Paedophile

Animal Quotes

Was sent these cool animal quotes a while ago:

"Where there are no tigers, a wildcat is very self-important." -- Korean Proverb

"A hippo does not have a sting in its tail, but a wise man would still rather be sat on by a bee."

"Where there is sugar, there are bound to be ants." -- Malay Proverb

"When the mouse laughs at the cat there's a hole nearby." -- Nigerian Proverb

After dark all cats are leopards." -- Native American Proverb (Zuni)

"If stretching were wealth, the cat would be rich." -- African Proverb

"One should not send a cat to deliver cream" -- Yiddish saying

"Don't call alligator long mouth till you pass him." -- Jamaican Proverb

"Let every fox take care of his own tail." -- Italian Proverb

"Hay is more acceptable to an ass than gold." -- Latin Proverb

"It is not the horse that draws the cart, but the oats." -- Russian proverb

"In a cat's eyes all things belong to cats." -- English saying

"God gives every bird his worm, but he does not throw it into the nest". -- Swedish Proverb

"A bird is known by his feathers." -- Yiddish Proverb

"One camel does not make fun of another camel's hump." -- Ghanaian Proverb

Even monkeys sometimes fall from trees." -- Japanese Proverb

"The frog does not drink up the pond in which he lives." -- Native American Proverb

"If you want to know what a tiger is like, look at a cat." -- Indian proverb

A roaring lion kills no game." -- African Proverb

"Show a dog a finger, and he wants the whole hand." -- Yiddish Proverb

"Give to a pig when it grunts and a child when it cries, and you will have a fine pig and a bad child." -- Danish Proverb

The cat is a lion to the mouse." -- Albanian proverb

"A tiger does not have to proclaim its tigritude." -- Nigerian Proverb

"At high tide the fish eat ants; at low tide the ants eat fish." -- Thai Proverb

"An ox with long horns, even if he does not butt, will be accused of butting." -- Malay Proverb

"An ant on the move does more than a dozing ox." -- Mexican Proverb

"In dog years I'm dead" – Unknown

"Outside of a dog, a book is probably man's best friend, and inside of a dog, it's too dark to read." -- Groucho Marx.

"The scientific name for an animal that doesn't either run from or fight its enemies is lunch." -- Michael Friedman

"Some days you're the dog, some days you're the hydrant." – Unknown

"Money will buy you a pretty good dog, but it won't buy the wag of his tail." – Unknown

"The average dog is a nicer person than the average person"- Andrew A. Roone

Animal Quotes