I had fun today, thanks to the raya celebration. Hontoni. but not as awesome as last year's though.
somehow i ended the day feeling absolutely miserable. unpleasant news were pouring in one after another, out of nowhere. the fact that i can't tell anyone about anything doesn't help either. and i can't even call my mom since she's still in Perth.
what a crappy way to end a perfectly wonderful day. i wish i can be devoid of all emotions.. for now.
Friday, November 26, 2004
Tuesday, November 23, 2004
Unlucky Me..
First time in history family aku tak raya kat Malaysia. dia orang pi raya kat Perth. and aku tak dapat join. aaa tak aci! Direct quote from my mom bila aku duk bising2 pasal tak aci masa balik Malaysia haritu "haha shadap lah Kirah.. too bad for you.. jalan2 in US is enough". cisss. takpe laa..
aunty aku kawin ngan one Aussie guy. he's a scientist. dia kagum dengan Islam and Quran (sbb dia byk buat research), so dia convert masuk Islam.. before he met my Aunty i think. so anyway, my family.. including nenek and aunty2 and uncle2 and kazen2 yg lain, pi lepak kat sana.
planning tak ingat dunia punya. through yahoogroups mailing list. muahahaha. our family sebelah penang ada mailing list sendiri. uncles.. aunties.. kazens.. semua masuk. tinggal nenek aku je tak masuk. hahahhhaha. we call ourselves.. the TD Clan.. TD means Tok Dis..our late grandpa.. my mother's father.. dulu he had a Mercedes.. so kami cucu2 semua panggil lah dia Tok Dis.. lol.. so despite tak dapat join the trip, i had to bear reading tons and tons of emails.. jealousss akuuuuu.
now my father, brother and sister dah balik. got to get back to work and classes. but my mom is still in perth. extended cuti. cikgu laa katakan..
next january org2 perth pulak nak datang malaysia. they came earlier this year, coming again next year. and i won't get to meet them!!!! aaaaa... tak aci lagi.. i want to meet my Aussie kazen.. we used to write letters dulu masa kecik2.. there's two of them.. Fatima and Amina.. Fatima writes to me.. Amina writes to my sister.. my aunty writes to my mother... hahahahha.. lawak gila... zaman takde internet... tulis laa surat..
aunty aku kawin ngan one Aussie guy. he's a scientist. dia kagum dengan Islam and Quran (sbb dia byk buat research), so dia convert masuk Islam.. before he met my Aunty i think. so anyway, my family.. including nenek and aunty2 and uncle2 and kazen2 yg lain, pi lepak kat sana.
planning tak ingat dunia punya. through yahoogroups mailing list. muahahaha. our family sebelah penang ada mailing list sendiri. uncles.. aunties.. kazens.. semua masuk. tinggal nenek aku je tak masuk. hahahhhaha. we call ourselves.. the TD Clan.. TD means Tok Dis..our late grandpa.. my mother's father.. dulu he had a Mercedes.. so kami cucu2 semua panggil lah dia Tok Dis.. lol.. so despite tak dapat join the trip, i had to bear reading tons and tons of emails.. jealousss akuuuuu.
now my father, brother and sister dah balik. got to get back to work and classes. but my mom is still in perth. extended cuti. cikgu laa katakan..
next january org2 perth pulak nak datang malaysia. they came earlier this year, coming again next year. and i won't get to meet them!!!! aaaaa... tak aci lagi.. i want to meet my Aussie kazen.. we used to write letters dulu masa kecik2.. there's two of them.. Fatima and Amina.. Fatima writes to me.. Amina writes to my sister.. my aunty writes to my mother... hahahahha.. lawak gila... zaman takde internet... tulis laa surat..
Tuesday, November 16, 2004
The Price of War
One of the hidden costs of the war in Iraq is that, a large number of the soldiers involved (mainly US and British) in the war were either sent back or opted out and came back from the war because of mental trauma. A research done by the US Army revealed that 1 out of 5 of US soldiers suffer serious mental health problems associated with post-traumatic stress disorder.
So let's see, roughly 300,000 US troops have been deployed to Iraq since the war started.. that makes it about 60,000 whose suffering mental problems. After some surfing, I found out that it is not uncommon for soldiers to come back from war and become mentally disordered. However, the numbers are more extreme in the case of the war in Iraq compared to the Vietnam war, mainly because more than half the world population do not support the war - they feel ashamed. But personally, I feel that what they did was imperative because they are soldiers and it is their job to serve their government and nation. Nevertheless, going to war exposed them to horrors that will live with them forever.
Most of the soldiers who are affected are too ashamed to seek for help, for they might be deemed as weak (askar2 ni sure macho2 dan tough2 ye tak). But dude, mental problem is detrimental in the long run. How are you going to live a normal life if you suffer from major depression or substance abuse etc... And the side effects? Impairment in social functioning and the ability to work, general distrust etc. Obviously there's more, but hey, I'm no doctor.
Sigh, I never thought of this before. This war in Iraq should not have happened in the first place. The initial purpose of this war is so fucked up. Who's to blame? You know who. Tapi semua yang berlaku ada hikmahnya.
Anyway, here's a link to read regarding the battle for Fallujah. It's news from 5 days ago. Some facts are already more updated. Such as, the number of civilians remaining in Fallujah is between 50,000 - 100,000 people instead of 300,000 sbb ramai dah lari selamatkan diri, and the insurgents are now cornered to the south of Fallujah by the US and Iraqi forces, instead of their initial base at the north of the 'City of Mosques'.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/middle_east/3993809.stm
So let's see, roughly 300,000 US troops have been deployed to Iraq since the war started.. that makes it about 60,000 whose suffering mental problems. After some surfing, I found out that it is not uncommon for soldiers to come back from war and become mentally disordered. However, the numbers are more extreme in the case of the war in Iraq compared to the Vietnam war, mainly because more than half the world population do not support the war - they feel ashamed. But personally, I feel that what they did was imperative because they are soldiers and it is their job to serve their government and nation. Nevertheless, going to war exposed them to horrors that will live with them forever.
Most of the soldiers who are affected are too ashamed to seek for help, for they might be deemed as weak (askar2 ni sure macho2 dan tough2 ye tak). But dude, mental problem is detrimental in the long run. How are you going to live a normal life if you suffer from major depression or substance abuse etc... And the side effects? Impairment in social functioning and the ability to work, general distrust etc. Obviously there's more, but hey, I'm no doctor.
Sigh, I never thought of this before. This war in Iraq should not have happened in the first place. The initial purpose of this war is so fucked up. Who's to blame? You know who. Tapi semua yang berlaku ada hikmahnya.
Anyway, here's a link to read regarding the battle for Fallujah. It's news from 5 days ago. Some facts are already more updated. Such as, the number of civilians remaining in Fallujah is between 50,000 - 100,000 people instead of 300,000 sbb ramai dah lari selamatkan diri, and the insurgents are now cornered to the south of Fallujah by the US and Iraqi forces, instead of their initial base at the north of the 'City of Mosques'.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/middle_east/3993809.stm
Saturday, November 13, 2004
Friday, November 12, 2004
If Only..
If only I'm able to not give a damn about anything and anyone in this world..
Except my religion and my family..
If only I'm brave enough to adopt such attitude..
Will I be a much happier person?
Maybe..
Maybe not..
Most probably not.. how more obvious could the answer be? The answer lies in the definition of Islam, Iman and Ihsan itself. Pi baca balik buku Panduan Lengkap Fardhu Ain kalau tak ingat.
But for now, I feel like shoving my foot in everybody's aR$e.
(gaya Red Foreman from That 70's Show, LOL)
**Currently emotionally unstable.. for no reason at all**
Except my religion and my family..
If only I'm brave enough to adopt such attitude..
Will I be a much happier person?
Maybe..
Maybe not..
Most probably not.. how more obvious could the answer be? The answer lies in the definition of Islam, Iman and Ihsan itself. Pi baca balik buku Panduan Lengkap Fardhu Ain kalau tak ingat.
But for now, I feel like shoving my foot in everybody's aR$e.
(gaya Red Foreman from That 70's Show, LOL)
**Currently emotionally unstable.. for no reason at all**
Wednesday, November 10, 2004
GempitaFest '04
In the spirit of having GempitaFest '04 organized in Umich this Thanksgiving, aku letak tepi dulu Naruto. He's a cool dude, he'd understand. LOL.
The managers are doing such a good job in organizing GempitaFest, this is the least I could do. With passion comes greatness. Keep it up dudes.
The managers are doing such a good job in organizing GempitaFest, this is the least I could do. With passion comes greatness. Keep it up dudes.
Sunday, November 07, 2004
Mawlaya
Got hold of this nasyid/zikir about 3 days ago.. pk punya pk apsal laa familiar sangat part chorus dia. Last2 baru aku teringat, everytime habis mengaji Kitab (ikut ayah aku), Ustaz Hafiz akan lead semua orang baca zikir ni ramai2 a few times.. actually, even the melody of the zikir sounds pretty much the same.. sigh.. ni yang rasa nak balik rumah ni heheh. Enjoy.
Saturday, November 06, 2004
Post Election 2004
So, Bush won. I somehow expected this. I think I even mentioned this to someone, Hakam maybe. It was a gut feeling, eventhough I clearly wanted Kerry to win. Wonder why?
About a month ago, while waiting for the bus at CC Little, I found this newspaper yg basically cakap pasal election sahaja. There was a list of the different policies between B and K. I agreed to some of B's and some of K's. For eg, B opposes the idea of same sex marriage, dia nak ban mende alah tu, which is obviously good. However, K supports lesbian and gay ppl kawin. On the other hand, I agreed to K's war and foreign affairs policies, and not B's. So after reading the whole list and making the comparisons, if I were to ignore the things that B has done in the past (I'm not, hence the reason I want Kerry to win), I would have had a hard time choosing who to vote.
Then yesterday, I got to know (from my American classmate) that B is kind of a conservative Christian, and you can say that K is pretty much more liberal, and he's a Catholic. B is more concerned with social illness and welfares, as opposed to K, who is more interested in international relations and the likes. So that explains everything. It also explains why K won nearly all of east and west coast states' electoral votes, and some states in the midwest region. Tempat2 ini lebih byk bandar2 besar, ppl are 'modernized', hence the way of thinking of these ppl is not so 'old-fashioned'. Whereas B won most of the other states, yg lebih byk org2 redneck, org2 kampung, except maybe Florida. In the end, everything boiled down to swing-state-Ohio, the Florida of the 2000 Election, lol.
In response to one of Deera's entry in her blog, if all the Malaysians in the States were to vote for K, B would still win. K was down in the number of electoral votes by a margin that is not recoverable(?) by the number of Malaysians in the US. Furthermore, B lead K in the number of popular votes by 3 million. K had no chance at all. Mathematically impossible.
I heard that a lot of students mmg deeply affected with the election results, particularly K supporters. Some tak nak keluar bilik, some won't even talk/sit with those who voted B, some could not concentrate in class langsung because dia orang worry too much about the election. So I guess it is true that there really are B-haters out there, somehow I used to think the Americans don't really care, especially students. I thought they were just hyped up about the election because it was 'in', with P.Diddy promoting the 'Rock the Vote' campaign on MTV and all. If I were an American, or if I were able to vote for that matter, I wonder how the election would have affected me. Heh.
About a month ago, while waiting for the bus at CC Little, I found this newspaper yg basically cakap pasal election sahaja. There was a list of the different policies between B and K. I agreed to some of B's and some of K's. For eg, B opposes the idea of same sex marriage, dia nak ban mende alah tu, which is obviously good. However, K supports lesbian and gay ppl kawin. On the other hand, I agreed to K's war and foreign affairs policies, and not B's. So after reading the whole list and making the comparisons, if I were to ignore the things that B has done in the past (I'm not, hence the reason I want Kerry to win), I would have had a hard time choosing who to vote.
Then yesterday, I got to know (from my American classmate) that B is kind of a conservative Christian, and you can say that K is pretty much more liberal, and he's a Catholic. B is more concerned with social illness and welfares, as opposed to K, who is more interested in international relations and the likes. So that explains everything. It also explains why K won nearly all of east and west coast states' electoral votes, and some states in the midwest region. Tempat2 ini lebih byk bandar2 besar, ppl are 'modernized', hence the way of thinking of these ppl is not so 'old-fashioned'. Whereas B won most of the other states, yg lebih byk org2 redneck, org2 kampung, except maybe Florida. In the end, everything boiled down to swing-state-Ohio, the Florida of the 2000 Election, lol.
In response to one of Deera's entry in her blog, if all the Malaysians in the States were to vote for K, B would still win. K was down in the number of electoral votes by a margin that is not recoverable(?) by the number of Malaysians in the US. Furthermore, B lead K in the number of popular votes by 3 million. K had no chance at all. Mathematically impossible.
I heard that a lot of students mmg deeply affected with the election results, particularly K supporters. Some tak nak keluar bilik, some won't even talk/sit with those who voted B, some could not concentrate in class langsung because dia orang worry too much about the election. So I guess it is true that there really are B-haters out there, somehow I used to think the Americans don't really care, especially students. I thought they were just hyped up about the election because it was 'in', with P.Diddy promoting the 'Rock the Vote' campaign on MTV and all. If I were an American, or if I were able to vote for that matter, I wonder how the election would have affected me. Heh.
Wednesday, November 03, 2004
Election Day 2004
Bush and Kerry are giving each other a good fight. At this very moment, Bush is leading and Kerry is not far behind. Aku tengok update Yahoo! News.. they are not official results, but the projected results are close to accurate. I don't really understand the technical details though.
But I pretty much care about the results of this election. I want Bush to be kicked out from the White House, why should we want this guy around when he clearly caused thousands of innocent Muslims to be killed? Takkan kita nak sokong orang macam ni? Plus, the US is so-called the most powerful nation in the world.. betul laa jugak tu. Since US ni sungguhlah power dan terrer, kita kena lah kisah sbb nak tak nak affect kita jugak sooner or later.
Eventhough Kerry is said to be a flip-flopper, he is the next best candidate since there's nobody else running for president, at least nobody as significant as him and John Edwards. If Kerry wins, kita tgk laa mamat ni macam mana pulak. We have yet to see what this guy is capable of. Takyah nak comment lagi dia bagus ke tak bagus ke. Let's just hope for the best. Whatever it is, kita tak boleh sokong orang yang terang2 telah menganiayai orang Islam.
But I pretty much care about the results of this election. I want Bush to be kicked out from the White House, why should we want this guy around when he clearly caused thousands of innocent Muslims to be killed? Takkan kita nak sokong orang macam ni? Plus, the US is so-called the most powerful nation in the world.. betul laa jugak tu. Since US ni sungguhlah power dan terrer, kita kena lah kisah sbb nak tak nak affect kita jugak sooner or later.
Eventhough Kerry is said to be a flip-flopper, he is the next best candidate since there's nobody else running for president, at least nobody as significant as him and John Edwards. If Kerry wins, kita tgk laa mamat ni macam mana pulak. We have yet to see what this guy is capable of. Takyah nak comment lagi dia bagus ke tak bagus ke. Let's just hope for the best. Whatever it is, kita tak boleh sokong orang yang terang2 telah menganiayai orang Islam.
Tuesday, November 02, 2004
Evidence and Interpretation
Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson went on a camping trip. After a good meal and a bottle of wine, they lay down for the night and went to sleep. Some hours later, Holmes awoke and nudged his faithful friend. "Watson, look up and tell me what you see."
Watson replied, "I see millions and millions of stars."
"And what does that tell you?" Holmes asked.
Watson pondered for a minute. "Astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, I observe that Saturn is in Leo. Horologically, I deduce that the time is about a quarter past 3. Theologically, I can see that God is all-powerful and that we are small and insignificant. Meteorologically, I suspect that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. Why, what does it tell you?"
Holmes was silent for a minute, then spoke: "Someone has stolen our tent."
Watson replied, "I see millions and millions of stars."
"And what does that tell you?" Holmes asked.
Watson pondered for a minute. "Astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, I observe that Saturn is in Leo. Horologically, I deduce that the time is about a quarter past 3. Theologically, I can see that God is all-powerful and that we are small and insignificant. Meteorologically, I suspect that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. Why, what does it tell you?"
Holmes was silent for a minute, then spoke: "Someone has stolen our tent."
Monday, November 01, 2004
Love Hate Relationship
This kind of relationship is the most frustrating kind of rship of all. Kau suka.. tapi kau benci.. tapi kau suka sebenarnya.. tapi siot ah benci pun ada gak.. pastu confuse sorang2.. LOL. This particularly pertains to me --studies-wise.
i like computer architecture.. eecs 270.. eecs 370.. eecs 470.. serious best blajar pasal how the computer works, and i enjoy the classes (but don't ask me how to fix one.. itu kerja technician.. a common misconception about CE majors, hampeh). i don't like signals and systems. eecs 206.. eecs 306.. so uninteresting.. belajar sbb terpaksa.
however.. i hate computer architecture classes aku punya exam.. susah nak mampos.. study like crazy.. and ur result still sucks no matter what.. signals and systems exams are wayyyy easier to score.. naturally, my results are better for the classes that i hate..
so, which is better, take the classes u like at the expense of hurting ur gpa.. or suffer through ur college years learning stuffs u don't enjoy but able to get better grades. masa zaman muda2 tak tau satu haprak pasal engineering.. of course choice #1 seems like the correct choice, semua sure pk yang tu lah choice paling bagus.. paling rational.. skarang after 3 years in Umich.. to hell with it. suffer kejap je.. in the end a good cgpa is what u want.. choice #2 is the most logical choice.
i like computer architecture.. eecs 270.. eecs 370.. eecs 470.. serious best blajar pasal how the computer works, and i enjoy the classes (but don't ask me how to fix one.. itu kerja technician.. a common misconception about CE majors, hampeh). i don't like signals and systems. eecs 206.. eecs 306.. so uninteresting.. belajar sbb terpaksa.
however.. i hate computer architecture classes aku punya exam.. susah nak mampos.. study like crazy.. and ur result still sucks no matter what.. signals and systems exams are wayyyy easier to score.. naturally, my results are better for the classes that i hate..
so, which is better, take the classes u like at the expense of hurting ur gpa.. or suffer through ur college years learning stuffs u don't enjoy but able to get better grades. masa zaman muda2 tak tau satu haprak pasal engineering.. of course choice #1 seems like the correct choice, semua sure pk yang tu lah choice paling bagus.. paling rational.. skarang after 3 years in Umich.. to hell with it. suffer kejap je.. in the end a good cgpa is what u want.. choice #2 is the most logical choice.
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