Simple Notepad Joke

intro:Simple notepad joke
I'm going to show you a simple joke with notepad.It's based on Visual Basic Script. Visual Basic Script is is an Active Scripting language developed by Microsoft. This will NOT HARM YOUR COMPUTERI MADE IT TO ENTER THE APRIL FOOLS SPEED CONTEST, SO IF YOU LIKE IT PLEASE VOTE!

step 1:Begining
Open Notepad and type this code:

dim answeranswer=MsgBox("Are you stupid?",36,"ALERT")

You can change the question ( Are you stupid?) with anything else.

step 2:Important part
Copy the second line several times, but be careful DO NOT copy it too much. The times you copy it depends on how many times the alert will show. I'll copy it 5 times. You have to copy this only this line:
answer=MsgBox("Are you stupid?",36,"ALERT")

step 3:Save
Go to File - Save as
Save your file at the Desktop with this name: DO NOT CLICK HERE.vbs
The name must end with .vbs

step 4:The joke
When you open the file you'll see that
It doesn't matter what you're going to click. You'll see this alert 5 times and you must click yes or no 5 times. ( this is because I copy the second line 5 times, if you copy it more times you'll have to click yes/no more times)

It's really annoying!!!!

Alternative code
In step 1, type code:

dim answer
answer=MsgBox("Are you stupid?",36,"ALERT")
do while(answer<>6)
answer=MsgBox("Are you stupid?",36,"ALERT")
loop

Other code:
dim answer
answer=MsgBox("Are you stupid?",36,"ALERT")
answer=MsgBox("So you ARE stupid, yes?",36,"ALERT")
answer=MsgBox("That takes some balls to admit you're stupid. You know that,
right?",36,"ALERT")
answer=MsgBox("OK, now the whole WORLD knows you're stupid! Hit that button again and tell the whole
freaking galaxy!",36,"ALERT")

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Change my old pc to old pc

Last several months my pc still got problem but can use it, already more than 5 months. The problem is sudden shutdown. im find result in internet, checking pc and maintance pc but still cannot solved. I'm onli 1 choice is find the technical support to checking my pc. So im register and log in the forum from SwissPac. I'm post question about my pc problem and finally jack who's admin from forum response answer. After that, we making decision and decide that technical support named Terry will came over my house for checking pc. after he is checking pc and found that the Capacitor on motherboard is fat bcos of its hot and burn will be fat and electric cannot access the capacitor will shut down. That's the pic show below:-

The solution is change new motherboard but cannot found the same model and processor bcos it is old. So I should buy new model of motherboard i.e. intel pentium Dual core. For change motherboard, I should change power supply, memory card and case bcos these r not compatible wif new motherboard, except cd-rom, dvd-rom, various of cards n hard drive. luckily my younger brother maybe will no use his pc and give me his pc so i hv save money. See the pics of b4 and after pc below:-

Before:

Intel Celeron 1.7GHZ Processor

After:

Intel Pentium D CPU 2.66GHz 2.67GHz

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WinXP Overhaul Guide: How to make it look like Vista, run like lightning, and stay productive, fast & smooth

Here's how to give your Windows XP installation a complete overhaul. It covers updating the interface, customizing, free software, speed tweaks, maintenance and troubleshooting. All the essential files you need are included in the downloadable 158.56MB Conversion Package. This guide is also located within, in case you want a quick reference. It should be viewable in Wordpad.

The package includes Vista themes, screensavers, games, cursors, applications, Wallpaper, user account images, screenshots, tweaking tools, and more. It is split into two pieces;

Part1 (100431 KB) Mirrors: Rapidshare, Mediafire, MyFreeFileHosting, Filecrunch, Uploaded.to, Filehosting

Part2 (65828 KB) Mirrors: Rapidshare, Mediafire, MyFreeFileHosting, Filecrunch, Uploaded.to, Filehosting

Use Winrar to extract.

Installing the Conversion Package
Here we have a freshly installed (or freshly cleaned- see page 4) copy of XP Pro; a blank canvas. Let's dive right in by setting up the bulk of the new files...

1. Download and extract XP_Vista_Conversion_Package.rar(Disclaimer) I am not the author of all the included files, but collected them freely from across the web. As far as I am aware, I am not violating any copyrights by distributing them and will cease immediately if requested by the author. This guide is also included within.

2. Drag the fonts from XP_Vista_Conversion_Package\Fonts\SegoeUI to C:\WINDOWS\Fonts

3. Drag the contents of XP_Vista_Conversion_Package\Theme to C:\WINDOWS\Resources\Themes

4. Drag the contents of XP_Vista_Conversion_Package\Wallpaper to C:\WINDOWS\Web\Wallpaper

5. The Vista screensavers are located in XP_Vista_Conversion_Package\Screensavers\Vista Screensavers; some sweet extra screen savers are in XP_Vista_Conversion_Package\Screensavers\RSS. Drag either or both into C:\WINDOWS\SYSTEM32

6. Make sure you can see hidden folders (My Computer-> Tools-> Folder Options-> View tab-> select Show Hidden Files and Folders-> OK), then drag the contents of XP_Vista_Conversion_Package\User Images into C:\Documents and Settings\All Users\Application Data\Microsoft\User Account Pictures\Default Pictures. You can undo that setting immediately afterward if you wish them hidden again

.7. IN XP_Vista_Conversion_Package\Enhancements, run setup.exe to install Cleartype. Allow it to run after installing, checkmark the box to turn it on, then click OK.

8. In XP_Vista_Conversion_Package\Enhancements\Aero Cursors, right-click the Install.inf and choose Install.

9. Drag Vista.Emulation.dll from XP_Vista_Conversion_Package\Games to C:\WINDOWS\SYSTEM32

10. Run any of the setups in XP_Vista_Conversion_Package\Games to automatically install them on your PC. Shortcuts will be located in the Start menu under 'Vista Games.'

11. Run UXTheme Multi-Patcher 5.5 in XP_Vista_Conversion_Package\Programs. Follow the instructions and reboot when asked.

12. After rebooting, click Start-> Control Panel-> User Accounts-> click on your account, and choose Change my picture. Yes, we now have the Vista user icons to choose from. Select one if you wish, click Choose picture, then close the User Accounts window. If your picture didn't show as changed there, don't worry, it is. You can verify in the Start menu.

13. Open Display Properties (right-click desktop, choose Properties). On the Desktop tab, click Customize Desktop, checkmark the icons you want on your desktop, then click OK. Now on the Theme tab, choose Vista from the dropdown and hit OK. Our hard work pays off, huh?

More Vista-izing with applications
If you're satisfied with what we've accomplished so far, feel free to stop. But there's much more to do, and it's worth it!

1. Download Mozilla Firefox and set it as your default browser if you haven't already. Internet Explorer is simply the number one cause of spyware, viruses, and maddeningly useless toolbar addons which clog up, hijack and slow down your system. Several Vista themes are available for it; I've included my favorite in XP_Vista_Conversion_Package\Firefox Theme.

2. Vista has Widgets (like an analog clock and weather), so let's add this feature to XP. Run the Yahoo Widgets setup, located in the XP_Vista_Conversion_Package\Programs directory. Do NOT just hit Next all the way through setup. On the first screen, click next. On the second page, click Next. On the third, unless you want to want them changed, UNCHECK the homepage and search engine option and click Install. When installation is complete, hit Close and Yahoo Widgets will start. If you like the side-dock and the 4-5 different Widgets on the desktop, fine. I close all but the clock and weather (right-click each and choose Close Widget). I also right-click the taskbar icon and choose Close Dock, though again, that's up to your preference.

Tweaking and speed tricks (Windows Settings)
Not everyone has new Core 2 Duo machines- and even if so, you may want to get every little bit of performance out of it you can. Here's some fairly easy steps that will give a speed boost to any system, especially older ones.

Windows Settings:

1. Visual Effects. This is especially helpful on older machines (low RAM and bad videocards) and the difference isn't noticeable for most people. Right-click on My Computer, and choose Properties. Click Advanced-> Performance Settings-> Visual Effects tab. Select Adjust for best performance (clears all), but then add back the following options: Show translucent selection rectangle, Show windows contents while dragging, Smooth edges on screen fonts, Use common tasks in folders, Use drop shadows for icons labels on desktop, and Use visual styles on Windows and buttons. Click apply. See any difference? Didn't think so :)

2. Virtual Memory. Still in the Performance Options window, go to the Advanced tab and click Change. There are constant arguments about what the best values are here, and every situation is different. My laptop has 2GB RAM, and I just select No paging file. I've yet to have an issue from this, and battery life has improved now that the hard drive isn't thrashing as much. A lot depends on what you do on your PC. Heavy Photoshop or video editors should probably let Windows manage things. For standard web surfing, online chatting and email (most casual users) you should safely be able to set the Initial and Maximum size at 1.5 or 2 times the amount of RAM you have, provided the machine has 512MB Ram or more. If your computer has more than one hard drive (not just multiple partitions) you can get a speed boost by putting the paging file on the second one instead of the system drive. Adjust as you wish, then click Set, OK, OK, OK when done. You'll likely have to reboot for changes to take effect.

3. System Restore. Also under System Properties, we have the System restore tab. This is another controversial option. If you choose to turn off System Restore, your system will speed up and you will reclaim disk space. However, you obviously lose the ability to 'go back' and undo harmful changes made to your PC. Again, this mostly depends on what type of user you are. I have never once had to use this feature, being savvy enough to troubleshoot problems or uninstall programs. If you're not sure, then just leave it on. If you're a semi-geeky power user or just struggling with a sluggish 400MHz Pentium II... you'll want it off.

4. Automatic Updates. Don't get me wrong, I keep my XP updated and encourage customers to do likewise. But what I don't like is Windows Update sucking up resources by running/downloading in the background while I try to encode video. I don't like the inane pop-ups telling me my computer will reboot in five minutes unless I click this button- only to have it pop up again ten minutes later. It kills productivity and drives users batty. So I turn the Automatic Updates off. Don't Panic; you can still manually check/start Windows updates whenever you want from the Start menu shortcut. I recommend weekly or biweekly.

5. Security Center. Microsoft has decided that no one can live without a Firewall, anti-virus, and Automatic Updates. XP therefore harasses you about it, and most users don't know how to make the pop-ups go away. Here's how. In Control Panel, open Security Center. Click 'Change the way Security Center alerts me,' and uncheck all three options. Click OK. The annoying little shield in your taskbar is now gone! Decide for yourself if Windows Firewall is essential or not.

6. Network folders and printers. In some cases, this would be a good thing- but it does often cause some delay when opening Explorer. If you don't care about automatically discovering network folders and printers (most average home users don't) then open My Computer-> Tools-> Folder Options-> View tab-> uncheck Automatically search for network folders and printers-> OK. This in no way stops you from accessing remote shares or printers. It just keeps Windows from checking for new ones since most users' network likely won't change between now and the last time you opened My Computer ;)

7. Remove Windows Components. Certain things are installed standard with XP which you will never, ever use. In Control Panel, open Add/Remove programs and select Add/Remove Windows Components. I feel MSN Explorer is a standard useless item, as is Windows Messenger. If you actually use these or other items, by all means leave them... but most of us have discovered better, newer alternatives than what originally shipped with XP. Some of these are mentioned in Part Two.

8. TweakUI, Image Resizer, and Exctrlst. Included in the Conversion package under Enhancements were these three programs which I sometimes find useful. TweakUI allows for altering hidden Windows settings, or changing the default behaviors. The Image Resizer powertoy allows you to (surprisingly enough) quickly resize images. It's pretty handy when you don't have Photoshop installed, or just need a jpeg made smaller with a click or two of the mouse. It integrates into Windows so is available with every right-click. Exctrlst requires a little more explanation. As XP runs, it keeps track of different processes and how they perform. These performance logs are sometimes helpful to system administrators, but most home users will never care or see this data. We can stop Windows from doing these performance logs with Exctrlst. Simply install (default is C:\Program Files\Resource Kit\), run, and uncheck everything.


9. Disabling Services. This is one area where I won't be too specific, sorry. Everyone argues about what's helpful or needed, mostly because every person and situation is different. It is worth doing, though. To edit which services run, click Start-> Run-> services.msc -> OK. There's a really good page about it that goes into more detail than I ever could here.


Tweaking and speed tricks (Registry Settings)
Registry Settings:

A. DISABLE LAST ACCESS UPDATE. Windows makes notes wherever it goes, recording and timestamping every time it accesses anything. Especially if you have a low-end computer, thisslows things down. Here's how to stop the obsessive logging:
1. Click Start -> Run -> type 'regedit' -> OK
2. Locate 'HKEY_LOCAL_MACHINE\ System\CurrentControlSet\Control\FileSystem'
3. Right-click in a blank area of the window on the right and select 'DWORD Value'
4. Create a new DWORD Value called 'NtfsDisableLastAccessUpdate'
5. Right click on the new value and select 'Modify'
6. Change the Value Data to '1'
7. Click 'OK'


B. IMPROVE XP SHUTDOWN SPEED. Sometimes when you're shutting down, XP will sort of just sit there and twiddle its thumbs, so to speak. That's because it is waiting for applications or services to stop hanging and shut down. Eventually it will do something about it, but why not get to it quicker? Here's how to make XP force a quick shutdown:
1. Click Start -> Run -> type 'regedit' -> OK
2. Locate 'HKEY_CURRENT_USER\ Control Panel\Desktop\'
3. Select 'WaitToKillAppTimeout'
4. Right click and select 'Modify'
5. Change the value to '1000'
6. Click 'OK'
7. Now select 'HungAppTimeout'
8. Right click and select 'Modify'
9. Change the value to '1000'
10. Click 'OK'
11. Now find 'HKEY_USERS\ .DEFAULT\Control Panel\Desktop'
12. Select 'WaitToKillAppTimeout'
13. Right click and select 'Modify'
14. Change the value to '1000'
15. Click 'OK'
16. Now find 'HKEY_LOCAL_MACHINE\ System\CurrentControlSet\Control\'
17. Select 'WaitToKillServiceTimeout'
18. Right click and select 'Modify'
19. Change the value to '1000'
20. Click 'OK'


C. Disable unnecesary naming convention. How many names do you have? Well, files and folders in Windows have multiple ones. If you never plan on interfacing with an older DOS-based machine, you can disable one of these naming schemes. Here's how:
1. Click Start -> Run -> type 'regedit' -> OK
2. Find 'HKEY_LOCAL_MACHINE\System\CurrentControlSet\Control\FileSystem'
3. Change the value of the NtfsDisable8dot3NameCreation key to '1'
4. Click 'OK'


D. Start Menu Delay. Did you know there's an actual programmed delay when you click the Start Menu, or navigate the Programs therein? To speed things up and make it snappier, just adjust the values described below to where you like them.
1. Click Start -> Run -> type 'regedit' -> OK
2. Find 'HKEY_CURRENT_USER\ Control Panel\Desktop\'
3. Double-click the MenuShowDelay icon on the right, and change 'Value data' from its default of 400 (milliseconds) to something speedier- even 0. I recommend around 200, but you can experiment to find what you're comfortable with.

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30秒为你的电脑系统清除淤塞的所有垃圾

是否注意到你的电脑系统磁盘的可用空间正在一天天在减少呢？是不是像老去的猴王一样动作一天比一天迟缓呢？
没错！在Windows在安装和使用过程中都会产生相当多的垃圾文件，包括
临时文件（如：*.tmp、*._mp）日志文件（*.log）、临时帮助文件（*.gid）、磁盘检查文件（*.chk）、临时备份文件（如：*.old、*.bak）以及其他临时文件。特别是如果一段时间不清理IE的临时文件夹“Temporary Internet Files”，其中的缓存文件有时会占用上百MB的磁盘空间。
现在就让我们一起来快速清除系统垃圾吧！！

下面是步骤很简单就两步！
1. 在桌面上点鼠标右键，选择新建一个“记事本”(text Document)
2. 把下面的字符复制进去
3. 点“另存为”，把文件名定为“清除系统LJ.bat”就完成，
记住后缀名一定要是.bat
双击它就能很快地清理垃圾文件，大约一分钟不到。

@echo off
echo 正在清除系统垃圾文件，请稍等......
del /f /s /q %systexxrive%\*.tmp
del /f /s /q %systexxrive%\*._mp
del /f /s /q %systexxrive%\*.log
del /f /s /q %systexxrive%\*.gid
del /f /s /q %systexxrive%\*.chk
del /f /s /q %systexxrive%\*.old
del /f /s /q %systexxrive%\recycled\*.*
del /f /s /q %windir%\*.bak
del /f /s /q %windir%\prefetch\*.*
rd /s /q %windir%\temp & xx %windir%\temp
del /f /q %userprofile%\cookies\*.*
del /f /q %userprofile%\recent\*.*
del /f /s /q "%userprofile%\Local Settings\Temporary Internet Files\*.*"
del /f /s /q "%userprofile%\Local Settings\Temp\*.*"
del /f /s /q "%userprofile%\recent\*.*"
echo 清除系统LJ完成！
echo. & pause


以后只要双击运行该文件，当屏幕提示“清除系统LJ完成！就还你一个“苗条”的系统了

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Malware - "youtube IS BANNED"

Yesterday nite, when i think i will going watch youtube and go browser to open it. when all a sudden youtube opened up for a few seconds, and then close and a popup error message appeared.

(title of error message) youtube IS BANNED
"youtube is banned you fool,The administrators didnt write this program guess who did??"
"MUHAHAHA!!"

(The grammar mistakes are intentional.. this is a transcript)
And an audio clip of evil laughter (sorta like as in the message) plays.. now if I try typing youtube in the address bar, IE closes and that same message with the audio clip comes up! I've tried clearing my cache but that doesn't seem to work.

Ppl hv experince about this problem. So they also tried using Mozilla FireFox but it says,

(Error message title) USE INTERNET EXPLORER YOU DOPE"I DNT HATE MOZILLA BUT USE IE OR ELSE..."

And, the error message seems to automatically close after 5 seconds.

How to resolve this problem?Below the solution:-
Run a virus scan and delete any viruses/trojan
THEN, restart and open up in safe mode and scan again.
If worse comes to worse back up your files and re-format.
EDIT; I did some research - this might come in handy.

Here is how to remove the Malware:
When you get the Message:
1. Go to the Task Manager
2. Click on the "Application Tab."
3. Right click on the application that is giving the message and select "go to process."
4 "Svchost.exe" should be highlighted.
5. Right Click and Select "End Process Tree"

If you really wanna get rid of the Malware there is a File called "heap41a" which is located in "C:\heap41a."This is the script in the file"

#persistent
#notrayicon
settimer,ban,2000
return

ban:
WinGetActiveTitle, ed
ifinstring,ed,orkut
{
winclose %ed%
soundplay,C:\heap41a\2.mp3
msgbox,262160,ORKUT IS BANNED,Orkut is banned you fool`,The
administrators didnt write this program guess who did??
`r`r MUHAHAHA!!,30
return
}
ifinstring,ed,youtube
{
winclose %ed%
soundplay,C:\heap41a\2.mp3
msgbox,262160,youtube IS BANNED,youtube is banned you fool`,The
administrators didnt write this program guess who did??
`r`r MUHAHAHA!!,30
return
}
ifinstring,ed,Mozilla Firefox
{
winclose %ed%
msgbox,262160,USE INTERNET EXPLORER YOU DOPE,I DNT HATE MOZILLA
BUT USE IE `r OR ELSE...,30
return
}
ifwinactive ahk_class IEFrame
{

ControlGetText,ed,edit1,ahk_cl... IEFrame
ifinstring,ed,orkut
{
winclose ahk_class IEFrame
soundplay,C:\heap41a\2.mp3
msgbox,262160,ORKUT IS BANNED,Orkut is banned you fool`,The
administrators didnt write this program guess who did??
`r`r MUHAHAHA!!,30
return
}
ControlGetText,ed,edit2,ahk_cl... IEFrame
ifinstring,ed,orkut
{
winclose ahk_class IEFrame
soundplay,C:\heap41a\2.mp3
msgbox,262160,ORKUT IS BANNED,Orkut is banned you fool`,The
administrators didnt write this program guess who did??
`r`r MUHAHAHA!!,30
return
}
ControlGetText,ed,edit3,ahk_cl... IEFrame
ifinstring,ed,orkut
{
winclose ahk_class IEFrame
soundplay,C:\heap41a\2.mp3
msgbox,262160,ORKUT IS BANNED,Orkut is banned you fool`,The
administrators didnt write this program guess who did??
`r`r MUHAHAHA!!,30
return
}
ControlGetText,ed,edit4,ahk_cl... IEFrame
ifinstring,ed,orkut
{
winclose ahk_class IEFrame
soundplay,C:\heap41a\2.mp3
msgbox,262160,ORKUT IS BANNED,Orkut is banned you fool`,The
administrators didnt write this program guess who did??
`r`r MUHAHAHA!!,30
return
}
ControlGetText,ed,edit1,ahk_cl... IEFrame
ifinstring,ed,youtube
{
winclose ahk_class IEFrame
soundplay,C:\heap41a\2.mp3
msgbox,262160,youtube IS BANNED,youtube is banned you fool`,The
administrators didnt write this program guess who did??
`r`r MUHAHAHA!!,30
return
}
ControlGetText,ed,edit2,ahk_cl... IEFrame
ifinstring,ed,youtube
{
winclose ahk_class IEFrame
soundplay,C:\heap41a\2.mp3
msgbox,262160,youtube IS BANNED,youtube is banned you fool`,The
administrators didnt write this program guess who did??
`r`r MUHAHAHA!!,30
return
}
ControlGetText,ed,edit3,ahk_cl... IEFrame
ifinstring,ed,youtube
{
winclose ahk_class IEFrame
soundplay,C:\heap41a\2.mp3
msgbox,262160,youtube IS BANNED,youtube is banned you fool`,The
administrators didnt write this program guess who did??
`r`r MUHAHAHA!!,30
return
}
ControlGetText,ed,edit4,ahk_cl... IEFrame
ifinstring,ed,youtube
{
winclose ahk_class IEFrame
soundplay,C:\heap41a\2.mp3
msgbox,262160,youtube IS BANNED,youtube is banned you fool`,The
administrators didnt write this program guess who did??
`r`r MUHAHAHA!!,30
return
}

}

return

Two websites which are been blocked...(Orkut and youtube)

Delete "C:\heap41a"

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