"it took me about three or four weeks to toilet train my cat, nightlife. most of the time is spent moving the box very gradually to the bathroom." -charles mingus
"she had a chihuahua named carlos that had some kind of skin disease and was totally blind." -tom waits
"he had a huge room with nothing in it except this huge vast hammond organ, right next door to the police." -david bowie
"he's got a mind like a sewer, and a heart like a fridge" -elvis costello
"you can't hold the hand of a rock 'n' roll man." -joni mitchell
"lou's jukebox spun for love and many other things, too: beauty, pain, history, courage, mystery" -laurie anderson
"hey there, hey now, well, you can make a pacemaker blink, easy thing, make a man's heart go bibbity boom. -john cale
"i've still got things inside me, sad things, happy things, that people don't know about." -loretta lynn
"to try to maximize the relationship of listening to a record through promotion is like experiencing driving a car by reading about stimulus programs." -bonnie 'prince' billy
"too much cheesecake too soon! old money's better than new" -roxy music
"my mother used to tell me about vibrations. to think that invisible feelings, invisible vibrations existed scared me to death." -brian wilson
"i could even find it in my heart to love mike love." -belle & sebastian
"i'm going to boogie my scruples away." -lowell george
"i'm a lunatic, and you are so super cool." - george jones
"i'm good and i'm bad and i'm happy and i'm sad and i'm lazy" -willie nelson
"i drive a rolls-royce, cause it's good for my voice." -t.rex
"i mean every letter in the words in the sentences of my quotes." -lil' wayne
"lyrics choochoo from my mouth like locomotion." - pato banton
"i'm dealing in rock and roll. i'm not a bonafide human being." -phil spector
"phil approached me with a bottle of kosher red wine in one hand and a .45 in the other, put his arm around my shoulder and shoved the revolver into my neck and said, 'leonard, i love you.' i said, 'i hope you do, phil.'" -leonard cohen
"they'd whisper at each other and look at phil and whisper at each other. finally this lady, tanked, comes over to phil and says, 'alright, sonny, what's your problem?' and he said, 'premature ejaculation, what's yours?'" -tom wolfe
"i bite my nails and if that fails i go get myself stoned, but when i do i think of you and head myself back home." -gram parsons
"i would say groucho marx, to name one thing, and willie mays, and the second movement of the jupiter symphony, and louis armstrong's recording of potatohead blues, swedish movies, naturally. sentimental education by flaubert, marlon brando, frank sinatra, those incredible apples and pears by cezanne, the crabs at sam wo's, tracy's face." -woody allen
brian eno songs that will make good book titles for my 10-volume memoir, in order: here he comes, baby's on fire, golden hours, brutal ardour, taking tiger mountain, events in dense fog, through hollow lands, some of them are old, everything merges with the night, dead finks don't talk
ry cooder albums that every man should own: into the purple valley, boomer's story, paradise and lunch
"really, we don't want people twiddling their goatees over our stuff." -radiohead
"i love songs about horses, railroads, land, judgment day, family, hard times, whiskey, courtship, marriage, adultery, separation, murder, war, prison, rambling, damnation, home, salvation, death, pride, humor, piety, rebellion, patriotism, larceny, determination, tragedy, rowdiness, heartbreak and love. and mother. and god." -johnny cash
"the moon is clear, the sky is bright, i'm happy as the horse's shite." -the pogues
"i hope that you all out there, young, old, tall, short, fat or thin, quick or slow, no matter what kind or color or shape or person you are, if you like to make music, why, go ahead. -pete seeger
"chuck berry isn't merely the greatest of the rock and rollers, or rather, there's nothing mere about it. say rather that unless we can somehow recycle the concept of the great artist so that it supports chuck berry as well as it does marcel proust, we might as well trash it." -robert christgau
mashable says about us: "expect the unexpected with this awesome gem. groovy." and 33 1/3: "nice to have someone steer me in a worthwhile direction"
#1011: gal costa - da maior importância (1973, live)
where harry nilsson’s medicine cabinet, django reinhardt’s accordion player and caetano veloso’s bathrobe meet it’s all blue smoke, wah-wah, musk, orchids, and untreated tobacco. it’s majorly important.
#1004 - harry nilsson - without her & mrs. muir’s lovesong (1969)
this week ben greenman did a beautiful thing for the world, listing his ten favorite lesser-known nilsson songs to mark harry n.’s new 17-disc collection. did you know back in the 1970s the man made a series of googly-eyed videos for the songs on knnillssonn? i didn’t, and they’re remarkable, built just from synchronized blinks, acrobatic eyebrows, and poetically halfhearted lip-syncing to the coconut-topping who done it? and billie holiday-worthy all i think about is you.
but! ben’s new yorker list makes the gobstopping mistake of leaving off snow – the saddest thing to happen to that very sad song since it was left off desert island disc-worthy nilsson sings newman.
i’m sorry to say it also cruelly ignores the 1969 season finale of the ghost & mrs. muir, a long forgotten sitcom starring the mom in blue velvet and the f.l.a.g. guy from knight rider. first harry plays his song without her, which i didn’t like until hearing this stripped-down fireside version. but then comes a love song he plays while channeling the titular 19th-century sea captain’s ghost love for a maine widow. really and truly.
“if i could link your arm in mine,” he sings, “the tropic sun, the emerald surf, the fleecy clouds like sugar spun, i’d happily forget each one, if i could link your arm in mine.”
yes! here we are! it’s a new day, a new month, a new year! let’s do this! come quick, everybody! that’s the spirit! team! on three! stretch! up and at them! onwards! upwards! onwards and upwards!
#839: harry nilsson and shelley duvall - he needs me (popeye, dir. robert altman, 1980)
i will commit vegetable-powered violence against any man who makes the uproarious claim that harry nilsson couldn’t reach the romantically glorious heights climbed by his friend and fellow hollywood songwriter randy newman. anyone who disagrees that he needs me is one of the finest wet-eyed moments in swelling cinematic sounds is a no better than alliterative oxblood oxheart, harry hotcash, j. wellington wimpy, bill barnacle, poopdeck pappy or george w. geezil.
blutos are blutos because they’re untouched by the words “love can turn the wheel.”
#823: the everly brothers - cathy’s clown (1960, live)
elliott smith isn’t rhyming when he sings, “first the mic/ then a half cigarette/ singing cathy’s clown,” but it gets me every time anyhow. so does cathy’s clown, so does phil everly’s pickguard on the guitar he played when on t.v. the year it came out, and so does don’s.
see also: harry nilsson plays cathy’s clown and other everly brothers songs.
i apologize for the generally light posting recently, but i’m sure you’ll understand that i’ve been very busy with the first three weeks of a private 70-day celebration of harry nilsson’s 70th birthday. he would be celebrating it, too, if he hadn’t gone and done what keith moon and mama cass also once did in his bedroom, which is die. keeping in mind those departures, the 70-70 celebration consists of sitting down after a long day in the newsroom with a cold glass of water (with a slice of lemon) and watching a full viewing of the point!, the thinking man’s yellow submarine.
#779: the everly brothers - walk right back (1961, tennessee ernie ford show)
this walk right back isn’t as good as harry nilsson’s, but nothing is. and being sad that something’s not nilsson is no way to live, friends–it’ll make you too blue. besides, the everly brothers did do the song first, which is something, and they have nice neckwear and completely respectable pompadours. plus there are two brief but wonderful glimpses of barely concealed rage after a harmony hiccup about half a minute in.
have to remember to listen to more monkees, especially pisces, aquarius, capricorn & jones ltd., but especially headquarters. also should remember to listen to more turtles, who are even better, especially the turtles present the battle of the bands, which friends i am here to tell you is good. how was it that chip douglas was in the turtles and also produced the monkees–and was, by all accounts, besties with harry nilsson?
have to remember to email chip douglas. “chip,” i’ll say. “how are you!”
#737: randy newman - god’s song (1972, old grey whistle test)
this is so self-evident that it doesn’t even need to be said, but it’s so true i’ll say it anyway: randy newman is one of the five best songwriters in the history of the world. “lord, no man is free” is the saddest line of the 1970s, but then so is “you must be crazy to put your faith in me.”
any common genius can include christmas-in-the-title christmas songs on his or her christmas mix (i.e. child’s christmas in wales by john cale, remember (christmas) by harry nilsson, in the hot sun of a christmas day by caetano veloso, merry christmas baby by chuck berry, christmas party by the walkmen, et al).
but it takes a special someone to include major leagues–the pretty song pavement made just as it was dying–on account of the line “magic christians chew the rind,” which really sounds like “magic christmas so sublime” if you’re not paying attention.
being on vacation is like lounging around naked or eating grapes from the vine–totally resplendent, and wildly relaxing, and without a doubt something one should do only very rarely. these are the albums i’ve been listening to with my family while slouching around this week in massachusetts. not only are they perfect, especially at certain parts of a mid-august day, but they’re available for semi-legal download thanks to glorious blogs like zamboni soundtracks, which, thank god, is back from a long hiatus.
10:35am: harry nilsson’s nilsson schmilsson - i’m sure it’s been said before, but the gotta get up/driving along/early in the morning triptych must be one of history’s great album openers. while you’re showering there’s the coconut/let the good times roll/jump into the fire trio to put even more pep into your already peppy stepping.
12:15pm: ry cooder’s paradise and lunch - over sandwiches you learn everything you need to know about melody, martinis, r&b harmonies, divorcees, tobacco, cornets, and coroners. as if the album needed more heart, ry’s wife painted the cover.
3:30pm: tom zé’s todos os olhos - the only early-70s brazilian album that sounds like the sun, looks like an eye, and turns out to be a marble in an ass.
6:00pm: yo la tengo’s fakebook - sad like dusk, happy like dusk.
8:05pm: caetano veloso’s jóia - good for digestion, great for creaky joints, perfect for easing that summer evening choleric yellow bile feeling in the old gall bladder.
10:55pm: the monkees’ pisces, aquarius, capricorn & jones ltd. - beer drinking music at its finest. was cuddly toy written by 10:35am’s harry nilsson? it was! is pleasant valley sunday 1967’s best song about the suburbs? of course. doesn’t drummer mickey dolenz’s face remind you of my college friend alex nemser? how could it not!
12:05am: blind willie johnson’s sweeter as the years go by - if you meet the special someone who considers this semi-appropriate music to make love to your special someone by, you will know for sure that you have met a very sweet special someone.
today’s news that john lennon’s solo catalog is going to be reissued from his highness’ original masterings is wonderful, especially because his phil spector-debut plastic ono band is one of the universe’s great underrated masterpieces. it’s the only record anyone’s ever heard that’s unbearably crisp and wildly sludgy at the same time, just like it’s both sweet and very terrifying. and go listen to harry nilsson’s cover of isolation, too.
but when will ringo starr get the same ultra royal reissue treatment? the man was a sweet-faced, outer-space, hard core boogie ace. even marge simpson loves him! richard starkey deserves better: that the metropolitan museum of art is displaying his gold-plated snare drum for his 70th birthday is merely a start.
i hereby request to be the official in-house mix maker for johns hopkins behavioral biologist roland griffiths and his swiss neural imaging research colleagues, who are studying the recuperative powers of psilocybin. the new york times’ john tierney explains today that one subject in their ongoing experiments, who happens to be a retired clinical psychologist, took his hallucinogens, “put on an eye mask and headphones, and lay on a couch listening to classical music as he contemplated the universe… he ranks it among the most meaningful events of his life.” nothing against classical music at all–in fact, i bought a lovely pablo casals album yesterday–but if dr. griffiths is out there, i hope he strongly considers mixing in some harry nilsson-written monkees songs, plus a lot of george harrison-written beatles songs, and several serge gainsbourg-written serge gainsbourg songs.
#506: harry nilsson - good old desk,together and skidoo (live on playboy after dark, 1968)
is it better to hear harry nilsson sing a beautiful lullaby about a desk, or to hear him convince young hugh hefner that its title is an anagram referring to “man’s modern concept about the meaning of god”? or is it better to hear him croon a swinging lounge love song about an ocean of sadness? or a song that’s made up of the credits to a druggy otto preminger film starring groucho marx, jackie gleason, slim pickens, peter lawford, frankie avalon and mickey rooney? no one can ever be sure.