Best Christmas Gifts 2010

I've nearly got all my Christmas shopping done which is a Christmas miracle in itself. I'm organized, I'm top of things, but when it comes to holidays I'm always busy having fun rather than shopping and planning.

Here's my list of Christmas gifts I'd recommend. Some of them are already here and wrapped, some are on the wishlist for coming years, but all are guaranteed and certified to be 100% great gifts.

1. The Icelandic Design Nepalese Cardamom Earflap Hat from REI. (have you ever had such a string of modifiers in your life??)  But despite the offensively long name that means so little I am in love with this hat. I can see myself skiing with those cute little pompoms waving in the breeze. I hope they make it in godzilla size for my extra enormous head.

2. The Kitchen Sink from Sea to Summit. I have a man who is obsessed with backpacking and light weight camping who would go bonkers for this. You can see how tightly it folds up and how big it gets so you can . . . do dishes on your vacation??

No, it doesn't make sense to me either but I know he'd love it.  Lightweight, waterproof and folds away--three things that he adores.

3. Lego Board Games. My boys are big Lego fans and have a Chevrolet-sized tub in their closet that they still bring out when they're looking for a good time. They've played the Lego video games but since video games are not kosher around here I was thrilled to see a new line of Lego board games.

You see here the Minotaurus game but they also have the Ramses Pyramid, the Pirate Code, Creationary, and Monsters--all promising to be just as interesting as this one.  And the best thing is that, unlike the regular Lego blocks which have a 7000% profit margin on little cheapo pieces of plastic that they sell for a fortune, these games are actually quite reasonably priced.  $20-30 depending on where you shop. Now that's a good buy.

4. Dragonstrike. When my kids were little they had a babysitter who brought this game with her when she came over and it made her their very favorite babysitter. They loved the game so much that I thought about buying it for them myself at Christmas but then I decided that that would just ruin the whole magic of her visits.  You can't put a price on a good babysitter now, can you?

Anyway, it's a board game with a mechanical dragon that attacks players' pieces and I don't remember much more about it than that. What else do you need? It's on sale at Amazon for $40 but I've seen it on sale in stores for as low as $10.

5. Go! Go! Sports Girl Dolls. For those of you who are just as disgusted with the creepiness of the Bratz plague these dolls ought to please you. I was sent one to review and immediately gave it my mother's stamp of approval. Lillian is a big fan of the Groovy Girls dolls and these look and feel very similar to those only they are athletic-themed.  One is a gymnast, one a swimmer, one a ballerina, etc. This one (the gymnast) is Maya and Lillian will be getting her for Christmas.

Plush, huggable bodies that are perfect for a purse or pocket and won't jab you in the eye when you take them to bed.  They are the same size as the Groovy Girls so you can use the accessories interchangeably.

6. Plush Animals by Mamma4Earth. Since we're talking huggable you can't get more huggable than these knitted animals in 100% soft merino wool.  Horses, chickens, giraffs, daschunds (or "dash-hounds" as Grace used to call them) and aardvarks are all there and they're seriously adorable.

If you'd rather make one yourself you can also buy the patterns there at her Etsy shop. Now go and see for yourself and tell me that that lion isn't the cutest thing you've seen all week.

7. Leather Bags from Adeleshop. I mentioned earlier that I bought one of her bags this fall and I absolutely love it.  I get compliments on it all the time (someone even mentioned that a little leather yellow purse is the "it" accessory to have this year) and I still can't believe that it's handmade it looks so professional and high-quality.

Working in Halifax she's sold a lot of bags and her best ones are gone but I bet if you dropped her a note you might be able to get a custom order if the one you love is sold.  Her prices are quite good, you'd never be able to get as fine a bag at a department store for the same price.

8. Sea Glass Bangles from Sistercreation. Again with the Etsy (I love shopping there, you can find the most unique gifts) and though these are sold, another benefit of Etsy is that you can often get the seller to make you one as a custom order. These bracelets are so beautiful and simple and I have this thing for beach glass.  I even sent Andrew the link with a not-so-subtle note that if he wanted to know what I wanted for Christmas this would be it.

9. Battleground game. My nephew has this game and every time he and the boys get together to play it it's a success.  It's just a whole bunch of pieces of medieval warfare--catapults, trebuchets, projectiles, etc.--and the boys spend hours hurling things at each other for points.  Better for points than for blood I suppose.

Anyway, my sister got her version for $10 and my brother in law found one on clearance at Toys R Us for $10 but I have looked for two years and have never seen such a good deal since.  The one on Amazon is $80 (but hey, free shipping, right??) which I can't bring myself to pay but the game is nearly worth that much it's so fun.  Maybe I can find one after Christmas.

10. The Name of This Book Is a Secret by Psydonymous Bosch. I have a reader who loves puzzles and anagrams and humor and this book promises to deliver.  The first of a series of five (or in hoity-toity language a "pentology") where each book is based on one of the five sense, this one incorporates the sense of smell and was published in 2007.  All five have now been published so if your little reader likes this one they won't have to be kept waiting to find out what happens next.  

There's No Place Like Home, There's No Place Like. . . .

I was born and raised in Anchorage, have lived in the same place for 30 of my 40 years, and while it's a nice place to raise a family and rather exotic in location (if you haven't grown up here) Andrew and I have been playing the "Where would you live if you had to live somewhere else?" game lately.

I haven't done any lists for a while but I'm giving ten places I think I'd move if I had to live somewhere else. Any thoughts? If you've got a great little place I'm all ears and, who knows? Maybe you'll find me camped out on your doorstep if you make it sound appealing enough.

Because that wouldn't freak you out or anything.

1. Bremerton, WA
I have a friend from college who moved to Bremerton and every year when I got her Christmas cards I inwardly groaned at the great things about her town. I don't like living in big cities but I do like having big cities nearby and Bremerton is a ferry ride from Seattle.

She described having horses and chickens and then going into town for a Mariners game. I like horses and I like chickens and, when they're playing well, I even like the Mariners so it sounds like a match made in heaven to me. I've always thought it would be fun to have my very own chickens. . . .

According to her letters the town had all the benefits of a rural community but close enough to Seattle to be able to enjoy the benefits there too. Maybe "Bremerton" means "paradise" in German? The only thing is having to live in Washington state--it does tend to be rather expensive there. It used to be (don't know if it still is the case) that when you moved in that they'd even charge you sales tax on the vehicles you brought with you and had already paid for. Nice. I'm not big on taxes.

Maybe I should talk to her and find out why they eventually left Bremerton for Texas. I mean, really now--is there something horribly wrong with the place that I should know before we move there?

2. Vermont
I don't care where in Vermont, anywhere in Vermont sounds great to me--and if you don't like the town you're in it's small enough that you can put your shoes on and hike it to the next town.

Why Vermont? Well I've always wanted to live in New England (but not in the cities--see previous entry on list) and I've heard nice things about Vermont, that it's rather laid-back and friendly (true or not? Someone enlighten me).

I've lived on the east coast and while it's very exciting I found (how can I say this nicely?) um . . . the people to be difficult. Status and prestige were very important, with new acquaintances introducing themselves along with their alma mater so as to truly wow you with their greatness and grandeur. Besides, customer service was horrific. No, make that non-existent, but I've heard that Vermont isn't like that.

Tell me, oh blogosphere, is this true?? Is Vermont really a land of milk and honey without the bureaucrats and government hierarchy yet with east coast (albeit wimpy) skiing? Because I picture my life there kind of like an episode of the Newhart show--inns and fall colors and quirky, delightful neighbors ready to share a hardy laugh over a cup of cocoa.

3. Bozeman, MT
I don't know if I feel as strongly about Bozeman as Steinbeck did (he was completely in love with it) but it's up there on the list for sure. Unlike Vermont, this is a place I have actually been to and it's truly a beautiful place. No, really beautiful. Even more than you're thinking. When I drove through it I remember spending the whole time with my face smooshed up against the glass, my mouth open in wonder at the beauties I was seeing but then Andrew tells me that if I'm trying to escape the cold of Alaska that Montana would not be the place for me.

I remember our North Dakota years and it was cold. REALLY cold. As in snow-flying-sideways-90-degrees-below-zero cold. But maybe if the summers were warmer than they are here I'd thaw out enough during the warm periods to make it through winter and winters can't be as long as they are here can they? Can they??

4. Homer, AK
For years I said that Anchorage is the only place in Alaska I could stand to live but that's really changed. Probably because I've grown up a bit and then the communities have too. You still have Anchorage, Juneau and Fairbanks as the only cities (and Anchorage dwarfs the other two with its nearly 300,000 people) but now places like Seward, Sitka, Ketchikan and Kodiak are making strong showings.

I've told Andrew that I think I could handle living in Homer very nicely. It's about five or six hours south of here and, while a tiny little village by many standards, it has a fun art-community feel. The ocean is accessible, the beaches are fun to comb and it's close enough to Anchorage that you could road trip-it back to the city should the need arise. Still . . . it is cold and windy. How much do I want warmth? I'm not quite sure.

5. Norwich, UK
For many, many years I've had this longing to live in an English village and while Norwich isn't exactly a village (it has about 130,000) it's a start. It would satisfy my love of history with its castle and cathedral and 30 medieval churches within the city walls but it is also near the east coast where you can go sailing and enjoy time on the ocean. Andrew St. Thorpe and other little villages are nearby for the visions of complete cuteness and, of course, London isn't that far for a really amazing weekend of theater and excitement.

I don't know--it sounds mighty fine to me. I'd even consider Scotland but then it seems a bit colder and wilder up there, though with considerably cooler accents.

6. Johnson City, Tennessee
Johnson City is the eighth-smallest city in Tennessee (in case you're ever assaulted by someone demanding to know that important piece of information) and was listed as fifth on the list of "Least Expensive Cities to Live" by some publication or another. Inexpensive is good.

The average cost of a home in Anchorage climbs and climbs and climbs and I can't help but think that it doesn't matter that we don't have sales tax and state income tax and get our yearly dividends if a basic house costs you $400,000, you're not exactly saving any money by living there. Especially when considering how much that extra $100,000-$200,000 works out to be over the course of a 20 or 30-year mortgage.

Of course I guess I always could be glad it's not California, right? No whining allowed after seeing their home prices. Oh, and Johnson City was also rated #8 "Best Place for African-Americans to Retire" which kind of cinches it for me.

7. Prince Edward Island
I put this on the list kind of hoping that it's not what I suspect--a total tourist place--and in my mind it's still as it is in the famous Anne of Green Gables books. But I have this sneaky suspicion that if I went there I'd find Anne on license plates, post cards and bill boards. Sigh. Is nothing sacred?

I've also heard that Anne is very popular among the Japanese, with loyal fans from Nippon traveling great distances to make the holy pilgrimage to Avonlea (or rather the town pretending to be Avonlea).

Oh well, I bet the island has been bought by Disney anyway.

8. Picton, New Zealand
Here's an island Disney hasn't got to yet--Picton is at the northern tip of the south island around the Marlborough Sounds and is part of the connecting link to the north island (if I have my info right). It's kind of quiet in the winter (i.e. summer here--isn't that just wild?) but gets cute and bustling once the summer hits.

Supposedly the area is beautiful with rivers and fjords and is one of the nicest places to visit. Andrew and I have said for years that if we couldn't live in the U.S. we'd go to New Zealand because it is just that cool. Everything that is super cool comes from New Zealand you'll notice. Including, but not limited to, Lord of the Rings, volcanoes, Russell Crowe, Maoris and Sir Edmund Hilary

9. Deer Isle, Maine
Deer Isle is a tiny community of 2000 on the southern shore of Maine nestled in one of those little inlets and coves. Linked to the mainland by a bridge, it's a place I've read about in books, a place where they still have New England accents and go lobster fishing and don't like newcomers--but they'd like me because I'd be extra nice to them and would win their trust and affections until I had become like one of the original founding fathers to them.

I'd probably do this with a lot of homemade jam and my recipe for upside apple pie but it would win them over in the end and we'd all live happily ever after. With my pet lobsters and my chickens named Harold and Stacy.

10. La Pine, Oregon
Notice there aren't too many places on the west coast here? Nothing against the west coast, except that most of it is California and I do have something against living in California. Too big, too crowded, too hedonistic, too half-naked. I really, really love the ocean and ideally would live near it but I've heard enough good things about La Pine to overlook this shortcoming.

La Pine is in the interior of Oregon but it's kind of an outdoorsy paradise, with places to fish and hike and bike and see--actually, it doesn't sound all that different from Alaska except that it's got to be warmer. The only things I really regret about Alaska are that I can't grow fruit trees and can't take road trips. Well, actually I could take a road trip but it would take five days to get to another state.

I think I could get fruit trees and road trips if we lived in Oregon. In fact, I think it's there in the fine print on their Chamber of Commerce page: "Guaranteed for all new move-ins: fruit trees and roads leading to other states."

Photo credits: Who knows? I got them from Google images and their stolen from all over the web. But at least I'm honest in my theft.

Looking for Some Good Video Rentals?

I wouldn't normally have so many movies to review but when we flew to India in March the Air France seats each had DVD players built into the headrests and with a total of 60 hours in the air I confess I did see a bit more television than I normally would watch (I also knitted a hat and read a book. Sixty hours, people, sixty hours).

Take my reviews for what they are--an opinion. And probably not that intelligent of an opinion, I tend to have erratic reactions to movies and you never know what I'll like and what I'll hate. But doesn't that just prove that I'm human?

1. John Adams
We borrowed this HBO miniseries from my sister on her recommendation and expected to love it since we're typically big on historical dramas. We would have seen it on cable when it came out but without actually having cable that was difficult.

Everything about the movie was flawlessly executed--casting, cinematography, story, attention to detail, etc.--and we did like it quite a bit though I liked the first disc and the time up until the Constitution was signed the best. Once things were in place and the war over, once he'd left for France things slowed down quite a bit and I found it less interesting. By the time he'd retired from politics and was no longer president I found it bordering on boring until finally as an old man he was grumpy and irritating until I caught myself wishing he'd just get on with it and die already (he lingered for quite a few episodes it seemed).

One part I found interesting was the relationship between Adams and his children. Essentially he was absent for most of their lives and the effect that had on the parent-child bond seemed as pertinent today as it did two hundred years ago. All in all a good film and a solid B grade.

Oh, though I forgot. I hadn't paid much attention to it being an HBO movie (hadn't seen a rating on it) until we got to a part that had a scene of tar and feathering where they stripped a man down and edited nothing (if you get what I'm saying). I'm not sure why they felt it was necessary--it's not as if we need to see that men 200 years ago are anatomically the same as they are today--and it irritated me. I wouldn't have watched it if I'd known about it. Seemed pretty pointless and tasteless.

2. Duplicity
This movie left me feeling kind of sad. I've always liked Julia Roberts and while I didn't necessarily expect much from this corporate spy thriller/comedy I still expected to like Julia. Don't tell anyone I said this but she looked kind of old. Old and irritating.

Now don't get me wrong--I'm about the same age as she is and there's nothing wrong with a woman aging. I much prefer it to the alternative but your favorite movie stars aren't supposed to remind you of your own mortality. She looked wonderful for her age, wonderful for a woman with twins, wonderful for any woman (much better than I do) but I think the part would have been better with a younger, fresher actress.

It's just kind of sad to see a 40-ish woman chasing a younger guy and still absolutely unsure of who she is or what she is supposed to get out of life as a character. I guess I'm saying you expect to be more grounded by that point in your life and it distracts from the plot. If there is one in this movie.

But besides that the movie was stupid. Or maybe I was--I had a hard time following the twists and turns until I felt as if I was reliving the first Mission Impossible movie and the only thing of which I was certain was that there had to be one last final twist to jerk you around once more. I turned it off before that point so I don't know if it came through. A D from me.

3. The Conversation
I can't remember where I learned about this movie but I looked it up at the library and put it on hold. It's from 1974 and stars Gene Hackman as an audio surveillance pro who overhears a conversation between a couple in the park.

The statement Coppola makes (did I mention it's a Francis Ford Coppola film? He made it in between Godfather movies) about privacy and the ethics of surveillance are so 21st century that you'd swear the man had a crystal ball in front of his director's chair.

The cast, the director, the promise of a thriller all lured me in but the film wasn't what I'd hoped though I feel I need to give an explanation. It's a different type of film from the loud-mouthed action flicks we have today--there's no pounding music or car chases or gun fights or things that we've been programmed to expect from movies. I'd say it was completely boring but I think it's more that this film has the feel of a short story set to the screen. I could totally imagine reading the story and being interested but visually, as a movie, it felt small.

There are things along the way that string you along, hoping that it'll get more exciting really soon and the ending was better than I had expected but still--it's a quiet, introspective and psychological film and I don't know if anyone out there would like it after being trained with the likes of the Bourne movies. I give it a C- but then I have the unsettling suspicion that if I were just smarter I'd give it a B+.

4. New in Town See? This shows I am a stupid movie goer because I kind of liked this one. Not LOVED, but liked in a let's-kill-two-hours-on-a-plane kind of way. It's completely formulaic, predictable and cliche. It's not well acted and not particularly funny or cute but then it has two big things going for it. 1. It has Harry Connick, Jr. and 2. It's clean.

Rene Zellweger is a corporate hot shot assigned to close down a company plant in the middle of Minnesota (I forget where, but I swear I've been there) and it's a culture clash film with her high heels being eventually traded in for steel-toed boots as she learns to . . . you get the idea.

Totally predictable. But clean and not unpleasant. Though it was funny--Grace saw it just before I went down to Nashville and saw HC Jr. in person at Blissdom and she really didn't "get" it. To him he was just a hairy lumberjack because he spends most of the movie covered in facial hair. I had to assure her that there was a musician under there somewhere.

A B movie. And I liked her shoes.

5. Knowing
See that look on Nicholas Cage's face? It's been trademarked I think because you see it in every. one. of. his. movies.

And none of them will even come close to the perfection that he attained in Raising Arizona but we won't discuss that here. Instead we'll just say that Knowing isn't a horrible movie. It's just different from your typical world-is-going-to-end movies. To me it felt kind of like The Ring meets Deep Impact where you've got freaky supernatural things going on coupled with all life on the planet about to be snuffed out in a second.

I liked Deep Impact but I did NOT like The Ring so it's fifty-fifty on this one. I'll give it a salute for being a little different and not having any stupid, completely unbelievable solutions for the earth's predicament (would you care to upload a computer virus to your mother ship? or shall we just melt the aliens with water?) And I kind of liked the end in a weird way just because it was different.

It could be worse and I don't know that it could be any better so I'll give it a B-.

6. Sydney White
Have I ever confessed to you that I'm an Amanda Bynes fan? I know it's kind of like admitting that I like to dress up in my old prom dresses and pretend I'm a princess while I do my housework (I don't) but I can't help myself. She's cute and her comic timing is quite good. She's kind of a modern-day Gidget only with a killer figure.

She's the Man is pretty funny if you haven't seen that one but we're here today to discuss Sydney White. Sidney's mother has died and she and her father are very close when she leaves for college to pledge as a sorority sister in the same sorority where her mother had been a legend.

But Sidney doesn't fit in with the snobby girls and ends up with seven little geeky friends and . . . it took me half way through the movie to discover that it was a retelling of Snow White.

Yes, I'm slow. Anyway, it's rather funny and sweet. It's not high drama but compared to the duds I've been dealt lately I'll judge it to be an A-.

7. Miss Pettigrew Lives for a Day
There are reasons why this movie should be at the top of my list--it's sweet, clever, cute, well-made, entertaining and perfect for Amy Adams' particular brand of flaky/froofy. It's one of those movies that comes along that's quite a treat and you enjoy it and think "Why don't they make more movies like this one?"

But then, for whatever reason, the people who make movies think the rest of us are ignorant enough not to recognize a quality production so they think that they have to add a few things here and there to get us to watch instead of letting the movie speak for itself.

The movie is so sweet and squeaky clean except for a scene of nudity that is merely thrown in so that the film doesn't get a PG rating and that disappoints me. Not only does it disappoint me but it reminds me that I need to be better about looking up a movie's content before I bother to check it out of the library. I'd give it an A but for that irritating scene.

8. Cloverfield
I don't think this one was supposed to be a comedy but it was so ridiculous that all you can do is laugh. And not in a nice way. When I borrowed it from my sister I had no idea what it was about so to find out I was watching a Godzilla remake was surprising.

Then to find out it was a Godzilla remake with Godzilla as a proliferating alien preying on promiscuous and unrealistically good-looking teenagers living way beyond their incomes in Manhattan was even funnier.

But then I've never been much of a monster movie fan. It's a horrible character flaw I'm sure. A D.

9. Time Traveler's Wife
I'd heard so much internet buzz about the book I was up for killing two hours on the plane with the movie. It was edited down to a perfect "G" rating so I don't know if the original was clean or not but it makes for a interesting take on the time-travel scenario.

Rachael McAdams plays a woman who, as a girl, meets up with a guy who time travels. End of story. Kind of--things jump forward and backward as they get more and more involved to the point where you can't tell when their relationship starts and when it ends--if it ends.

Very confusing but not unpleasantly so. For me casting is a big part of a movie and I like McAdams and Bana and it all kind of worked for me. Though the biggest problem with any kind of time travel movie is that there are always inherent problems with the plot--holes here and there where you say, "But if he/she/they can travel through time why don't they just do X??" Because if you can travel through time you have the power to ultimately undo any conflicts that may arise which completely implodes said conflict at the bottom floor. Or don't people who write time-travel books realize this?

But putting that all aside I still liked it enough to give it a B.

10. Confessions of a Shopaholic
Am I the only one out there who positively can't tell any difference between Isla Fisher and Amy Adams?? I swear it's like they cloned a Disney princess and think we can't tell what they've done.

But despite this case of double identity I liked this one. Again, it's very predictable and girly. In fact, Andrew gave Spencer quite a hard time when he came home and found his son watching this with me. It has a sweet little message about not valuing yourself through shopping and the problems that arise from materialism.

I suppose it's Hollywood's way of capitalizing on the economic issues of overspending and consumer debt and I guess I'm glad that someone in this country is making money on the situation because the rest of us aren't.

But if you're in the mood for perky, pretty and plenty of shoes then this is the film for you and I wouldn't begrudge you one moment of blissful oblivion. A B flick.

11. Crash
Ah, finally a movie that gets a solid, resounding A. Feels as if I've been mired in pathos doesn't it?

My sister had an edited copy of this movie and brought it home with her for the summer several years ago and all my family had seen it and swore I'd love it but it was only until our trip that I finally saw it. It's one of those cast-of-thousands film where they take a dozen stars and wind them over and around and through the plot, without any one of them having more than ten full minutes of actual screen time. But it all works so well you end up being caught up in each story and you feel as if you've had an epic adventure by the end credits are rolling.

Plot? It centers around a car crash (hence the title) and each of the characters is somehow touched by the incident. The theme is that of racism: how it's everywhere and unavoidable and colors every moment of our experience and while that may sound terribly dismal (it is rather) the film has its inspiring moments.

Brendan Fraser plays the politician, Sandra Bullock his wife. Don Cheadle the L.A. detective, Matt Dillon the racist LAPD officer. Tandy Newton is the producer's wife to Terrance Howard's producer and yada, yada, yada . . . A solid A with solid performances and a story that will make you examine yourself and wonder how well you really know your own soul.

12. Push
Sigh. Back to the duds. Seriously, avoid this movie as if your television might leak toxic fumes once the DVD is inserted into your machine.

I think it was trying to capitalize on the popularity of Heroes but it was boring, bizarre, digitally graded to the point of a video game, disjointed . . . what else can I complain about? How about the disturbingly freaky bulgy-eyed Chinese guys? Seriously folks, avoid this one at all costs. It took me all of 20 minutes to figure that out.

If you need more to convince you I'll just say that it's as if an amateur camera man was paid to follow Dakota Fanning around Shanghai for a day and he kept tripping over his shoelaces. I hate that shaky-camera thing that's all the rage now, the only film I will tolerate with it is the Bourne movies--I'd suffer through any amount of bad camera work for that trilogy--but it's a supernatural world of people with special powers where the government is the bad guy and there are all sorts of stereotypical scary Asian gangsters that chase the heroes through alleyways. Grim I tell you, very very grim.

13. Up in the Air
This one, however, is a gem. Again, I saw this fab film on Air France where it was edited down to a G rating which begs the question that if, in its clean and family-friendly form, it's such a wonderful and high-quality story then why in the world did the producers feel the need to smut it up? It seems to me it's the equivalent of stocking your soda with caffeine. It adds nothing to the body of the movie and only is designed to addict you to the junk.

But enough ranting . . . back to the movie. George Clooney is great as this middle-aged corporate chop shop who finally hits that mid-life crisis despite his insisting for so many years that "he's fine this way."

Great story, great cast, the ending is interesting and satisfying in its own odd way and it somehow made me feel better about my own life after watching it. Though, oddly enough, I really identified with the whole thing and found myself easily slipping mentally into the story.

Definitely an A.

14. 2012
HAHA! This is the movie that made had me rolling in the aisle--it's simply hysterical. And if you haven't seen this YouTube spoof on the movie then click over right now and get your dose of culture.

In a nutshell the plot is this: the world is coming to an end because the Mayans--who as we all know are responsible for such amazing contributions as the first manned flight to the moon, the cure for polio, the Sistine Chapel, and Beethoven's 5th symphony--oh, wait! I forgot. The Mayans didn't do any of that. They were too busy conquering neighboring tribes and ceremonially eviscerating them.

Anyway, because the Mayans were such a technologically and culturally advanced civilizations it behooves all of us to take notice of their prediction that the world will end in 2012. Or at least that's how a bunch of internet geeks have interpreted things.

But the world is coming to an end and our heroes have ten minutes to drive to safety as California falls into the sea. And that's pretty much it.

I had free access to it on the plane and about the time the broken-down RV was jumping the Grand Canyon at 115 mph with a pyroclastic fireball gaining behind them I had a hard time seeing the screen through my tears of laughter so I turned it off. I hope they survived.

15. Bright Star
I love, love LOVE period movies and will see anything that guarantees Empire waists so I eagerly selected this Jane Campion movie in my little personal video player between Turkey and Iraq.

It's the true story of the romance between poet John Keats and Fanny Brawne but the movie starts out with me wondering what she could possibly see in him (he's emaciated and sickly and slightly effeminate. Hardly your Mr. Darcy) and then continues with me wondering what he sees in her (she's grating and rude and proud and the kind of person who tells you exactly what she's thinking. I've never liked people who do that).

The plot is slow, laborious and the romance seems terribly unbelievable given the main characters. There's a lot more chemistry and interest between his roommate and Fanny--maybe that would have livened things up--but I gave up before that even became a possibility. In fact, if you go to Wikipedia and look up the movie instead of giving you paragraphs of plot and subplot all it says is this: "For three years, poet John Keats carries on a love affair with the girl next door, Fanny Brawne, which is cut short by Keats's death." That's it. Shows you how boring the movie truly is.

Anyway, I was so disappointed I cried then I turned it off--or I think I might have tried New Moon (that's how desperate I was) but could only stand ten minutes before my eyes began to bleed.

***

BUT . . . lest you think I'm an old movie curmudgeon I did see Sherlock Holmes and LOVED it. I didn't bother to review it because you've probably all seen it but I expected to hate it and had a nice surprise. I love movie surprises. It's not as over-the-top action as the previews make it out to be and if you've read the original stories it actually follows their essence fairly well. Holmes is a martial arts-style expert and boxing champ and only when the movies put in Basil Rathbone did the character become so wimpy and weak and solely-cerebral. I think it's a refreshing remodel but it did make me wonder why all Sherlock Holmes movies seem to be required to deal with the Egyptian occult? That's so totally been done before but I'll let it go for now.

And of course I'm eagerly awaiting the summer blockbusters. Knight and Day, The Last Airbender, The Sorcerer's Apprentice, Prince of Persia, Iron Man 2, Letters to Juliet, Clash of the Titans, How to Train Your Dragon, The A-Team, The Karate Kid, Toy Story 3, Inception, Despicable Me, The Avengers, The Hobbit . . . I'd love to see them all. Can you tell I love action movies? It's because I identify with them so whole-heartedly. My life is very exciting I tell you.

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Movies to See Instead of Going to the Theater

I'm always a fan of a good movie and usually the summer and Christmas movie runs are eagerly anticipated around here but this year? Pretty disappointing. There isn't really anything I'm particularly interested in seeing--certainly not Robert Downey, Jr. butchering Sherlock Holmes as dramatically as Stephanie Meyer butchered vampires and werewolves. Apparently the pen is definitely more destructive than the wooden stake and poor Bram Stoker must be rolling in his grave.

But ah me, it's just as well--tickets are nearly $10 and there are only a handful of films that could possibly qualify as being worth that kind of money.

SO . . . we'll be watching movies at home this Christmas and enjoying a comfy sofa and popcorn that doesn't cost $17 per ounce of buttery goodness.

The hardest thing about watching movies at home, however, is that with six people in the room it's hard to find things that are appropriate for all. So today I'm listing some of the movies that we all enjoy for a family movie night together. Some of them are good for younger children but most are things I'm comfortable letting my 10, 13 and 15 year olds see. If you have any recommendations of your own please let me know because I'm always on the lookout.

1. The Guns of Navarone
Not for small children but if you happen to have a teen boy in the house this is a must-see. Gregory Peck, David Niven and Anthony Quinn form part of a World War II special-ops team assigned to destroy the gigantic guns guarding the Greek island of Navarone in time for the British to come to the rescue of the doomed prisoners.

It's one of my favorite macho war movies, right up there with The Dirty Dozen and The Great Escape (also great films) and while not everyone in the house is a war movie aficionado it's still a great movie. Suspenseful and well-acted as you'd expect with a cast like that. No rating on this one because it was made in 1961 though it is in color, don't worry. If I try to throw a black and white classic at them it's complete and total anarchy, I do know my limitations.

2. Castaway
I'm partial to Tom Hanks movies with the kids because so many are clean and well-made. We watched Joe v. The Volcano the week of Thanksgiving which is quirky and odd but strangely appealing. Probably because Meg Ryan has some lines to hoot over.

"I have no response to that."

But I digress. The subject is Castaway, the movie that takes Robinson Crusoe to the level of reality television and succeeds marvelously. My boys like it for the adventure angle and my girl likes it for the romance (plus adventure). It is rated PG-13, which you can't dismiss lightly, but it's for intense action sequences (like a ginormous plane going down in a scene that rivals the train wreck in The Fugitive for intensity--man I nearly went into labor with Grace right there in the theater when I saw that for the first time. Not a good movie to see while 9 months pregnant.) Otherwise it's clean.

3. Silverado
Another manly movie. I like westerns okay, it's not as if I'm haunting Clint Eastwood or anything, but this . . . THIS movie is a favorite. The cast is all-star: Danny Glover, Kevin Costner, Brian Denehy, Kevin Kline, Jeff Goldblum, John Cleese, Scott Glenn and others I can't quite recall right now. All westerns are essentially the same--guns, shooting, revenge, injustice followed by eventual justice, the savagery of nature and the savage nature of men--and this one follows the formula wonderfully.

Again, it's PG-13 so it's not good for small kids, but it's rated that for the shooting that goes on and the cowboys do occasionally have colorful cowboy mouths but it's not heavy stuff and my boys loved the movie.

4. The Man Who Knew Too Little
If you're a Hitchcock fan you'll recognize the pun in the title and it ought to give you an idea of the fun you're in for. Bill Murray can be sooooo funny and this is my favorite movie he's made. It's full of hysterically quotable lines and funny scenes that we'll still laugh about.

Murray plays a dingaling guy (which I know is a given) come to visit his brother (Peter Gallagher) in London as a surprise. The surprise comes at a bad time so the brother unloads Murray for the night by buying him tickets to an experimental theater show called "The Theater of Life" where people can pay to participate in a scripted spy caper--kind of a live-action version of choose your own adventure.

The only problem is (and there's always a problem, right?) Murray gets twisted around and gets himself involved in a real spy caper, thinking it's fake and he bungles through as only Bill Murray can. Rated PG.

5. Apollo 13
See? Another Tom Hanks movie. Told you I liked him (but then who doesn't?).

You probably remember this film about the 1970 Apollo 13 moon voyage where the famous "Houston, we have a problem" line was uttered but if you haven't seen it you must. A great movie and historical films are always good for talking about afterward and inspiring further study. I'd also recommend Spartacus, A Man for All Seasons, Amadeus, Ghosts of Mississippi, Gandhi and Memphis Belle as good historical movies and I'm sure there are plenty more that I just can't recall right now.

Rated PG

6. Operation Condor
James Bond is always fun but Jackie Chan is even more fun (unless we're talking Casino Royale, then forget it, James Bond is definitely better).

The problem is, Bond isn't exactly the greatest role model for children and you know what I mean. Try Jackie instead--and while there's plenty of punching and dodging and kicking and bullets flying it's not gory and you won't see him with a martini or a babe in bed. Other martial arts movies tend to take themselves way too seriously but this one is played for the comedy (I still do not get Crouching Dragon Hidden Tiger--what was up with that flaky ending???)

Operation Condor is his best movie, while some of the others are fun they tend to fall into this tumble mess of Hong Kong city scenes and dubbed second-rate actors. It's PG-13 for the action.

7. Sky High
Okay NOW we've got movies for smaller kids though the great thing about this one is it's enjoyable enough that adults can watch it too. The premise is that this kid is the child of two superheroes and just like Harry Potter gets called into Hogwarts at age 11 this young super guy gets to go to the high school for super heroes: Sky High.

Honestly? It's Kurt Russell's funniest role and the lines actually get you chuckling. There are sappy kid movies that are a drain to sit through and then there are those that take pity on us as parents and give us something we can enjoy too.

As with all Hollywood successes the film inspired a knockoff called Zoom which stunk. Don't bother with it, stick with this one and enjoy. Rated PG.

8. The Kid
The movie where Bruce Willis made his transition from hardened NYC cop fighting super bad guys to sensitive leading man not afraid to show his vulnerability though the real star of the movie is the kid himself. The boy who plays Bruce's younger self with all his lisping, chubby cuteness.

Bruce goes back in time to meet up with his younger 10 year-old self to determine why his life hasn't turned out quite the way he'd originally intended and of course goes through all that self-discovery, repentance and resolution that you'd expect from the screen writers guild.

Again, a movie that's good for adults and kids alike, rated PG.

9. Secondhand Lions
Don't be fooled and think that because this is possibly the sweetest most endearing movie ever made that it's just for kids or that it's all cheese and sugar. With Michael Caine and Robert Duvall you can expect that it's a first-class production and it is a fabulous movie for the whole family.

A boy on his way to being a man is foisted on his elderly uncles living in the middle of the Heartland. The men are eccentric but wise and full of stories and advice that is just what the boy needs and just what we need to keep us watching and chuckling and enjoying ourselves when we watch it.

I don't know why movies like this are considered "family" movies, they ought to just be considered "excellent" and leave it at that. I see no reason why they should be shoved off into a separate category merely because they're devoid of offensive material. End of tirade.

Definitely an A movie, rated PG.

10. Willow
Another Ron Howard film and a favorite from the 80s. Not at good as Lord of the Rings but then what is? And while it's not as good it's funnier, which I do appreciate--thanks Ron.

I've tried to hit all sorts of genres with this list and here's my nod to fantasy, this mini epic (is that an oxymoron?) follows our heroes (including Val Kilmer) as they try to save the world from the evil queen while rescuing the child of which it has been prophesied that salvation would come. Got it?

Watch the brownies, they're a crack-up. And while the costumes, set and cinematography aren't exactly Peter Jackson it's a fun movie that gives you plenty to enjoy--rather like The Princess Bride. Rated PG.

11. Without a Clue
If you're going to mess with Sherlock Holmes then THIS is how you do it. Take notice Robert Downey, Jr--Michael Caine takes on the role with Ben Kingsley as the ever-present Dr. Watson but the twist is that Holmes is a complete idiot and Watson is the brains of the operation. Holmes, an out-of-work actor, is hired by Watson to increase his street cred with the guys at Scotland Yard and things go off from there.

Great comedy, AND it includes the bonus of having Ed Rooney (remember Ferris Beuller?) playing Inspector Lastrade, the only man possibly as stupid as Holmes himself.

Rated PG. And if you like this you might try Dirty Rotten Scoundrels with Caine and Steve Martin, another classic comedy that I love love love which is also PG.

12. The Rookie
Sports movie? Check. This one's good though there is also Rudy, Remember the Titans, Rookie of the Year, Cool Runnings and Little Big League as well, depending on the age you're trying to entertain. Oh, and Invincible is pretty good too--though that's for older kids.

I like sports movies well enough, they're all pretty much the same, and this one follows the tracks with reliability.

Rated G though and I have to at least give it a mention--when was the last time they made a G movie at all, let alone one that adults could sit through as well? You kind of have to go back to the Disney princess era for that.

13. Ever After
Speaking of Disney princesses, here's the girliest movie on the list and it's a great one. Ever After is the live-action Cinderella story, told with plausibility as if you were trying to explain how it could have really happened.

Drew Barrymore is fun, the clothes are beautiful, the movie is romantic without being saccharine and I give it two thumbs up. It's rated PG-13 for "brief intense language" but honestly? I can't remember ever hearing anything at all like that--I must have missed it because it seemed squeaky-clean to me.

It even has it's fun lines and chuckles too.

14. Galaxy Quest
Can you tell I'm more inclined to a movie if it's funny? This one is great, it's really a spoof on Star Trek and it cracks me up.

Tim Allen, that guy from Monk, Sigourney Weaver, Alan Richman--great cast, funny lines, clever scenario, it's all there and if you haven't seen it you're missing out.

Oh, and it also has that guy from the Mac commercials (I don't know his name) that makes Macs look cooler than PCs. He's in it.

Though I warn you, you'll never look at Gilligan's Island the same way again (inside joke--watch the movie). Never. Rated PG.

15. Nicholas Nickleby
And my nod to period movies. This one is touching, sweet, well-made, and thoroughly a thrill. And while it has those typical moments of Dickensian squalor and abject human suffering it's not a bad movie to watch together because you can then talk a bit about what you saw. My kids got pretty choked up over the plight of poor Smike.

I'm talking about the 2003 version with Anne Hathaway and Allen Cummings and the rest of the fabulous cast. And if you like period movies then there's always of course Pride and Prejudice and the whole Jane Austen collection but this one is probably the best for younger kids. Just an opinion.

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Beautiful Homemade Gifts

We've been encouraging the kids to make their own Christmas gifts but it's not always easy to find good projects that people will actually like.

Here follows some of my favorite projects from around the web--some good for kids, some better for adults--there's still enough time to get a start on some of these.

1. Make felt book covers
You can find good patterns all over the place for felt book covers, I've seen some with cute little pockets for pencils or strings attached with charms on them, this is one of the prettier versions and the link above gives a step-by-step tutorial.

2. Crochet snowflakes
Martha Stewart has a tutorial for a few styles but you can find these too all over the place. Pretty as package toppers or for decorating the tree or a window they're a beautiful little gift. Someone gave me a set of them years ago and we still hang them on the tree.

3. Make a bedside organizer
This is a good gift for younger gift givers and with a bit of glue it can be a project that doesn't require any sewing skills. A good gift for adults or kids, boys or girls.

4. Grow a ginger plant
By using a piece of ginger root you can start your own ginger plant indoors--a nice gift for someone who likes plants. They like humidity and filtered sunlight like most tropical plants so they're not a bad option as a houseplant. The instructions are on the link.

5. Make tiny terrariums
You know I love terrariums, they're just so cute and they always make fun gifts. A few of my recent favorites that I've come across are Altoid tin gardens, and lightbulb terrariums, globe terrariums.

Plants are always a nice gift and tiny is always endearing. The perfect combination.

6. Make a sewing duck
I love this little guy--I've seen another pattern for one where there is a pin cushion built into the duck's back.

This particular sewing duck was on Etsy and has since sold out though you can get an idea how to make one from the picture. Very clever.

7. Crochet knights and a castle
See this cute little toy? A castle with knights, a dragon, a horse and princess--cute beyond words.

And you might even have time to finish it before Christmas if you hurry. Of course if you don't like the castle you can always instead crochet a dwarf battle helmet which is extremely tempting.

8. Make a tea party play mat
This is so cute! You'll need some sewing skills but if you've got the time and the skills it promises to be a gorgeous gift. And since I'm not including a picture with this one I'll just say that it's a tablecloth that has plates, cups, silverware and tea goodies on the fabric just as if it were a tea party set for a princess. Really cute. Did I say it was cute?

9. Make a bottle of sea glass candy
So pretty! I love the packaging too--nearly as sweet as the candy inside.

I think I'd make mine watermelon flavored. I really like watermelon flavoring for some reason--it's weird though because it tastes nothing like real watermelon.

10. Make a survival kit
A great gift for kids to make, you take a tin box (again, Altoids work well) and fill it with things for your recipient's hobby. Fill it with bandaids, gauze, ointment and aspirin for a tiny first aid kit or fill it with wax, a wick and a package of matches to make an emergency candle (both are good things to keep in your car or kitchen).

Fill it with a needle, thread, buttons and tiny scissors and it makes a great sewing kit. Put a bandaid, flash drive, piece of candy and a pre-paid calling card and it's an emergency kit for your college student.

All sort of possibilities.

11. Make your own perfume
I haven't done this yet but it sounds so fun to try. If nothing else, you'd come away smelling so good.

12. Make a nutcracker
All this would take is a bit of drilling and a clamp and you've got a modern and sleek nutcracker, Don't forget a bag of walnuts.

13. Make some slippers
Very chic. The tutorial is there so there's no excuse.

14. Make an outdoor fire pit
I've wanted to do this for a while but there's not much sense in making a fire pit this time of year. No one would stay outside long enough to enjoy it. But still . . . it's a fun project.

15. Make iron-on placemats
Another project kids could make. This version has you ironing apples on burlap with fusible webbing but you could easily change it to a holiday picture or you could have children cut out their own shapes and let them decorate it with unique patterns.

Either way it's a cute project and would make a sweet gift.

***

And you can see previous posts where I've listed other great crafts for kids to make here:

Christmas Gifts Kids Can Make
Crafty Gifts to Make
More Crafty Gifts to Make
Christmas Gift Wrapping Ideas

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