Every year I'm like "I should really read the Neon Hemlock novellas" and then perhaps I actually manage to get around to reading one of them, but this year I ... thought I had read all of them because I thought there were only four published but it turns out in fact now that I check there were several more than that. Well! I read four of them! They were all very gay and very tropey; under these subheadings, I enjoyed two of them quite a bit, one of them didn't hit for me, and the last one I found incredibly frustrating, for personal reasons.

The two I liked were No Such Thing as Duty, by Lara Elena Donnelly, and The Oblivion Bride, by Caitlin Starling. Both of these have a definite air of fanfiction about them: No Such Thing As Duty is a 'what if my favorite historical guy met a sexy vampire' fic, the favorite historical guy in question is W. Somerset Maughan. I have come to the conclusion that I'm really quite charmed by this sort of thing as long as the favorite historical guy in question is not a pre-existing big seller like Christopher Marlowe or Charlotte Bronte but someone who I actually have to look up:* the author's real victory is in making me Wikipedia their special historical guy and go 'whoa, sure, lot going on here actually'

*I'm aware this is very subjective and there are many people out there who don't have to go to Google to know basic things about W. Somerset Maughan. But they ARE a lot fewer I think than the people who don't have to go to Google to know basic things about i.e. Lord Byron. That said, if you are experiencing boredom at the idea of Yet Another Sexy W. Somserset Maughan fic, I'd love to know about it.

The Oblivion Bride meanwhile is a classic Lesbian Arranged Marriage fic that, per the author's note, appears to have grown out of a Dishonored fic the author wrote several years back. I don't know anything about Dishonored so I can't tell you much about that. What I can tell you is that she's a normalgirl cadet member of an important family who's been thrust into an important political position because all her actual aristocratic relatives have mysteriously died, she's an icy cold Murder Alchemist General and also Magical Detective who's marrying her by order of the prince to solve the mysterious deaths and keep the political assets in the hands of someone loyal to the throne; could they actually fall in love? The answer will shock you! Anyway, I like tropes, and I like lesbians, and I like that Caitlin Starling is never afraid to lean into her id; I was as happy to read this in novella form as I would have been on AO3.

The Dead Withheld by L.D. Lewis is the one that didn't quite hit for me -- it's a supernatural noir about a PI who can talk to the dead investigating the cold case death of her wife, and it is doing exactly what it says on the tin but something about it never quite grabbed me. Too short? Not enough oomph? Anyway, it might grab you!

and The Iron Below Remembers by Sharang Biswas drove me up a wall, in large part because the worldbuilding it's doing is extremely playful and interesting and fun -- it's set in an alternate universe where a South Asian empire was the major early colonial power instead of Rome, and their abandoned artifacts and technology power contemporary superheroes. The protagonist is an academic dating a superhero; the text is heavily footnote-studded and 50% of the footnotes are really fun and interesting little explorations of this alternate history. Unfortunately for me, the actual plot laid on top of this rich worldbuilding is all Gay Superhero Relationship Drama and the other 50% of the footnotes are gossipy anecdotes about the protagonist's sex life. This is certainly going to be a feature for some people but was, alas, a bug for me; every time I went through the effort to click through the annoying footnotes format on my digital edition I was really hoping to get a meaty paragraph about what happened after Siddhartha marched into the city of Rime and did not feel rewarded any time I got a smug half-sentence about shibari instead.

I am not allowing myself to dive into the Yuletide archive this year until after reveals due to a bunch of other reading commitments that have to get done by early January, BUT! I obviously made an exception for my own

THREE

INCREDIBLE

GIFT

FICS:

The Knight Under the Apple Tree

“Our crop is well tended,” Celia protested, despite all evidence that it was not. “It grows copiously out yonder.”

Oliver turned his head to look out the window. “Indeed, the grass outside does grow most mightily.”

“It is a sheepcote, sir; as the name suggests, it is for the keeping of sheep. Thus grass is essential.”

“And yet I do not see the sheep.”

I asked someone to sell me on As You Like It's Celia/Oliver side ship and I have completely received my wish: this fic is SO cute and does such a lovely job filling out the relationship between these characters until it feels like something that fully exists and that I want to root for

A rainbow-stripe in another proper world

“None of it ever happened,” said Uncle Nirupam in his precise way, “and so we have no memories of it, of course. But the instincts remain. I felt the same way when I first visited this world. I thought, is this where they burn people like us?”

The first of two excellent Witch Week fix-it fics -- this one is a short little outsider-POV gem in which Janet Chant and Nan Pilgrim are married, which is not something I would have ever thought of in a million years but which delights me deeply! galaxy brain!

Remember, Remember

“To produce the required crispiness, the mandrake is dipped in wallpaper paste, dredged in sawdust, and then pan-fried until it is completely burnt on all sides,” Nan recited obligingly. “It is served with a side of slugs poached in their own slime. Their chewy texture provides a perfect complement…” Estelle was howling with laughter by this point. Nan, as always in such moments, felt as though she were being carried along by an inexorable flood of words quite independent of herself. A rhyme was pushing insistently at the inside of her head, and she let it out without the least idea where it was going to finish up:

“Crispy mandrake, extra fancy,

Bring me something

Chrestomanci!”

and THIS one is a luxurious and voice-perfect THIRTEEN THOUSAND WORDS spent with my beloved terrible children as their memories are returned by way of an encounter with the TRAGICALLY ABANDONED SENTIENT GARDEN IMPLEMENTS. ABSOLUTE GALAXY BRAIN AGAIN ... I'm so happy ...

and having been Yuletided well beyond my deserts, I now leave the archive for now but I look forward to reading everyone's recs on the other side!