Sun Shine Down - Review & Giveaway

I like books that can make me cry, and true stories - memoirs - that make me cry are even better. In fact, if you write a memoir and I read it and don’t cry even once, then I wonder what the heck you wasted my time for. If I borrow your life for a while, I want to feel something I have never felt in my own. Sun Shine Down by Gillian Marchenko accomplishes that. And considering I have lived through my own birthing of a child with Down syndrome, that was no easy feat.

Gillian is an American married to a Ukrainian and living in Ukraine when she gives birth to their third child, a girl with a surprise diagnosis of Down syndrome. The birth itself was traumatic and the aftermath was even worse. Gillian found herself in the inbetween space of wanting to, and knowing she is supposed to, love her baby and not quite being able to. She is both physically (the newborn is in the NICU for weeks) and mentally separated from her child. Her story is one of how she found her way to loving Polina.

I think most people take loving a baby for granted. You just assume it comes naturally, and in most situations it does. But sometimes when our expectations clash with our reality, love does not come easily. Gillian turned to many outside sources for support. Some good, some dangerous. The book is very honest about her sorrow and depression (which she was always prone to.)

The book is a little shorter than your average memoir, but I actually appreciated not having to wade through her whole life history or every needless NICU detail. She focused on the things that mattered, and she writes about them so artistically that I could not evade feeling what she did. Most Christian writers (Gillian is a born again Christian married to a pastor) can’t help but let their faith drive their narratives, but not Gillian. God was in the book but he wasn’t the “fix.”

The climax of the story is obviously that Gillian falls in love with Polina and even though you know it has to come sooner or later, when it does you’ll get chills and you might just find yourself crying again. In most stories, the resolution is the last thrill you get, but not in this story... Gillian included an epilogue that brings you back to Ukraine where you get to meet the girl who will become their fourth daughter. Those last paragraphs left me wanting more from her.

If you are looking for a good read to curl up with this winter or a great story to give as a gift to your favorite reader, Sun Shine Down will do the trick. If you’d like to score a free copy, leave a comment below. I will pick a random winner in a week or so.

What I Did Over Summer Vacation

Now that school has started back up, I will take a few minutes to reminisce about the first family vacation I have been on in more than five years.

It came about on a fluke. Sometime in July Kimani got sick right before a family birthday party. She stayed home with daddy while my mom and I drove with the four other kids to the birthday party a few hours from my house. On the way back my mom remarked that everyone was so good in the van that the trip was "easy". Right then a crazy idea occurred to me. Mom and I could drive these kids all the way to Tennessee to visit my dad and stepmom (who can no longer travel to us).

My husband agreed, plans were made, and a vacation was born.

On the way, we stayed overnight at a hotel with an indoor pool because I learned long ago that the hotel pool is the best way to break up a long drive.


We arrived at the house my dad built for my grandmother (which is right next to his own on the TN river) on what would have been her 100th birthday. I have not been there since before my grandmother died, so it was sad for me and I missed her terribly. It took my kids a few hours to stop running around like maniacs in the house which is about four times the space they are used to. My dad had gone out of his way to get baby gates to block certain doorways and the stairs. Ha, Autumn got through them in about five minutes. She was so proud of herself standing at the top landing.

My little daredevil.


We enjoyed a couple lazy days of visiting, playing, and fishing. My oldest son caught his first fish. He was so proud of it that my dad froze it and insisted we take it home to show daddy.

Playing doctor. Poor baby doll needed a shot.


Waiting for a nibble.


Showing off his first fish.


Mom and I loaded the kids up and drove them to Gatlinburg to visit the Ripley’s Aquarium (so worth it if you can ever get there).

Undersea awesomeness.


Taking a cuddle break.


My clowns checking out the clown fish inside the tank.


Jade wishing for a snack.


Walking through the aquarium tunnel admiring the sharks.


Masha and Autumn were awestruck.


The King crabs were a favorite of the kids but I love the jellyfish.




All of us posing in front of the tunnel mural.


We had only one afternoon of bad weather. And wow, did that monster storm ever come on fast. We barely made it back from the dock to the house without getting poured on. The boys loved watching the lightening, wind, and rain over the river from the safety of the couch.

Trees ravaged by the winds.


The next day we took them to the Knoxville zoo. School had already started for the kids in TN, so the zoo was fairly empty and the weather was perfect making for a delightful day.

Getting silly by the elephants.


Trying to get the gorilla to get up and play.


Enthralled with the meerkats.


They offer camel rides and for a few brief moments Autumn indicated that she wanted to do it. As the boys were climbing on, she came to her three year old senses and ran the other way.


The Knoxville zoo has a play area with a water stream that the kids can splash in. Masha showed great balance as she hopped over the stones. Autumn, not so much.






And Jade... that boy can’t go anywhere without attracting a little girl to him. He is a natural gentleman.


Family shot near the black bears. Oh my, a white tiger crashed our pose!


That evening everyone was exhausted, and though Autumn’s darling personality held up...


Her strength did not...


Every visit to TN ends with family photos in front of the fireplace. The kids were excited to pose with grandma but by the time it got to my turn they were getting antsy and bored.




Then we went over to grandpa’s for pictures and good-byes.


That little extra push to get back to that hotel with the indoor pool... so worth it!




Monkey see, monkey do!


So there you have it. Nine action packed days of travel and fun. We all missed daddy and Kimani and by the end the girls were asking me everyday, "Home? Daddy? Kimani?"

Yeah, they missed their daddy for a week, but I miss mine all the time... I love hanging out with my dad and I look forward to getting back to Tennessee soon.

(You might be wondering why we would not just all go. Kimani does travel in the car fairly well, and for the most part she enjoys riding in the stroller through entertaining places, but as you can see from the pictures the house is not and cannot easily be Kimani-proofed. And, the deciding factor was that both houses literally sit on the points of side-by-side capes jutting into the river; water on three sides with no fencing.)

View from outside grandpa’s front door, as beautiful as it is dangerous.

The London Trip

I am a casual history buff with an odd collection of books, mostly morbid compendiums, memoirs, and period anthologies. Sometimes I foray into documentaries or even made-for-tv dramas on the History Channel. All the while I keep in mind that the history I can know about is only what survived and is hardly more than whispers of what might have actually happened. Which is why I love to travel and see for myself the lands, what is left of man’s architectural feats and creative constructions, and the artifacts spit up by the ghosts of long lost people.

On May 27th I flew to London to visit a best friend who is working there for a couple years. Her apartment is on the edge of Greenwich and that is where we started out. The world’s time line is there, up on the hill at the Royal Observatory. I adore timepieces and globes, so a visit inside was mandatory.


Outside the observatory


The 24 hour clock.

In Central London we did the Hop On/Hop Off tour which I recommend if you don’t mind being a total touristy tourist. We stopped at the London Eye and Big Ben and wandered around. We wasted a couple hours in the London Dungeon (a must skip attraction) and then hopped on/off near the Tower Bridge and had dinner. That bridge is stunning, probably the prettiest bridge I can ever remember crossing. When I first saw it, I assumed it was the infamous London bridge but no, London bridge (now in its 3rd? iteration) is not nearly as lovely.


Walking across the Tower bridge.

The next day we continued our tour with a boat ride up the Thames from Greenwich to the Tower. The history of the Thames and its bridges was fascinating, and somewhat sad.


Tower bridge from the Thames.

Then we spent the rest of the day, a rare sunny day, at the Tower of London, the first major castle built in 1078 by William the Conqueror. Of course it has been added to several times through the centuries. It is famous for its prison which housed Anne Boleyn until her execution, and then later her daughter Elizabeth for a while (before she was crowned QE1).


The Tower of London from the Thames.


The sun really did shine the day I visited the Tower.

There is so much to see inside the Tower, like the crown jewels—the most stunning collection of gems and gold I have ever seen—or the collections of armor, weapons, coins, clothes, etc. housed in the original white castle building. But, the most interesting things were those that charged my imagination with connections to individuals whose lives were separated from mine only by time as I occupied the same spaces they had.

Someone stood in this window with a crossbow and defended against the men who manned this catapult...





A prisoner locked away in a high up tower etched this into the stone wall. I tried to imagine having that much lonely time on hands and why this image over any other:





I wondered about the beating hearts on either side of this portcullis as it lowered between them offering perhaps protection, or grief.



I really enjoyed London and would have loved a few more days there. The hard ciders were delicious, the fish -n- chips were as tasty as I had always heard they were, and the croissants were reminiscent of France. I did not get a few more days in London though... because I spent them in Ireland instead but that is a post for another day.