Positive Affirmations for Parenting: You win some. You lose some.

Last week I was at Target and saw these spider twinkle lights for sale in the Halloween section.  They were $12. 'Tis not the season for spending $12 on frivolous spider twinkle lights, so I passed them up...feeling a wee bit sad about it, because I thought they would be super fun to string in Eli's room. 

You know, 'cause nothing says 'boy' like spider twinkle lights.

Fast forward to yesterday...it was one of those days that felt like the only way to survive was to load the kids up and wander the aisles of Target.  (do you have those days??)

So I did.

And guess what was on sale??  50% off, for that matter?!?

THE SPIDER TWINKLE LIGHTS!!!

Glory, Hallelujah!

So we sat on the floor and pontificated on which spider twinkle lights were the best and decided on the larger ones with glitter and multiple colors.

Because nothin' says 'boy' more than spider twinkle lights with glitter.

I brought them home and was super excited to hang them.  Kevin had the brilliant idea of stringing them from under Chloe's mattress on the top bunk!  Fabulous idea!

Well...this morning was a bit bumpy (to understate my frustration) as I got a certain precious and strongly opinionated girl ready for school...I was feeling like I was losing.

So, when Eli asked to do something with the spider lights it felt like a 'win' was in my near future.

Off come the blankets!  Off comes the mattress!  Off comes the wood plank that supports the mattress!
And ON go the spider twinkle lights!!! I made a fort with the blankets and even made a secret entrance. 
I was rockin' the Mom thing!

I was seriously chanting positive affirmations in my head,
"you are a cool Mom." 
"you are so. fun." 
I. was. WINNING!

Then Eli attempted to enter the fort through said secret entrance and proceeded to slip through some stinking crack that had escaped my attention, possibly giving himself a shiner.

True. Story.

But for a split second...the positive affirmations were working!

You win some.  You lose some.

Turtle

Eli is all into 'squishy animals'.

They are a sticky plastic with little styrofoam balls inside.

The animals feel real-ish and he loves them.

As in... plays in the sink with them (as they are mostly sea creatures for obvious reasons) on a daily basis.

Sometimes more than once a day.

He is particular (surprise) about them. 

They can not have any carpet fuzz or hair on them.

They can not be 'dirty'.

I was out of town this past weekend and found a squishy sea turtle that I knew he would LOVE!

So I brought him home and I was not disappointed.

Meet Turdie.

Yep. That's his name.

Eli named him TURDIE.

The humor of this name is lost on Eli.
Because who actually says turtle "TUR - TLE." (emphasis on the second 't')
No. One.  That's who.
We all say TUR - DLE with the 'd' sound.
So 'Turdie' is a completely logical name for this animal, is it not?
How many times a day do I get to hear, "Mommy?  Where is Turdie?" or "I can't find my Turdie!" or "Look, Mommy! Turdie is floating in the sink!"

A. Lot. I'm telling you!
And each time I feel like a middle-schooler...because I want to giggle and cringe at the word 'turd'.

Side note:  This word is actually on my 'least favorite word' list.  I had a friend in high school that actually wrote it on my car window as a joke...because I disliked it that much....and now I get to use it on a daily basis in reference to a toy turtle.

Funny.  Life. Is. Funny.

How Do You Eat An Elephant?

One bite at a time, right?

Well, I'm eating mine with a plastic spork.

Progress is SLOW.

Scared the Pee Out of Me...

Somehow...when Chloe was supposed to be getting ready for school this morning, she managed to scare Eli.

In attempt to tattle, he said, (very seriously)

E: "Chloe scared the pee out of me."
Me: "She scared the pee out of you?!"
E: "Yeah."
Me: "She scared you and you peed a little bit?"
E: "Yeah. She scared the pee right out of me."

What is doubly funny is that this is not a phrase he has heard us use...so it's almost like he invented it.