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Orlando Pendejos please get your tickets to this show at Alex’s Underground Comedy asap. August 14th 10 pm. I’ll be pulling up with merch and good times. I love you. I really need new pictures.
alexsundergroundcomedy.com/theunderground…
jake rhodes
110K posts
jake rhodes
@jakebrodes
- When I was a kid I was at McDonald’s at the top of the slide with another kid. He said go go go! And pushed me down into the dark. When I got out of the slide he was somehow waiting for me at the bottom. I told my mom about it and she said I’m glad you made a friend honey
- Apply to jobs you aren’t qualified for. Lie on your resume. Leave friends as references. Build out fake portfolios. Make fake companies on linked in and link to them as former employers. Get the job figure it out. Don’t pay debts ever. Dislocate both shoulders boxing. Be a man
- Yelling “God has cleared a path for us today” then immediately crashing your car with your whole family in it is Coen brothers shit.Trump supporter crashes his car while speeding in the snow, screaming about Trump, and blasting "maga music". He was livestreaming WHILE DRIVING 💀
00:00 - Ok so I’m homelander (white, strong, indestructible) and my wife is Sidney Sweeney (honkers, blonde, family racist) and whenever we hear “partner” we go blegh.
Me and my wife at school conferences when the teacher mentions her "partner" - I really try to not give into the smug, condescending reaction of “fuck man people are stupid as shit” because it doesn’t do any good. And I think it’s one of the many reasons why we’re in the predicament we’re in in this country. But fuck man people are stupid as shit.this is why we need the department of education😭
00:00 - Lately been obsessed w the aesthetics of this type of far right thinking. Doesn’t matter that this is a fan made video of American movies depicting mostly characters of 70s left wing counterculture set to a song made by a black man. It represents something else entirely.This is MAGA 2025 And no one is taking it from us
- Is there a picture of him where he looks, I don’t know, not like an evil con man.BREAKING: California Gov. Gavin Newsom is reportedly considering a presidential run in 2028, per AP.
- Climate change isn’t real. Bunch of globohomo bullshit I reckon. You know what is real. A hurricane machine that spawns randomly in various parts of the deep blue sea that generates cat 4-5 hurricanes designed to punish Christians and patriots and cyber truck owners.
- A woman never receives her poké burrito. A man’s ride home from the bar never comes. But two robots share a kiss in the cool midnight air.A self-driving car collides with a food delivery robot in San Francisco, December 2024.
00:00 - Hey man wanna grab lunch. We’re going to this taco place called Floofys. All the tacos are like $9 and they suck dick. Theres a bunch of neon signs everywhere that say Be A Messy Bitch and Me Gusta Tequila. a racist gay couple from Vermont owns it. It used to be a womens shelter
- robert Pattinson was told to put on more muscle for Batman and was like no thanks I’m good. Then the director was like alright man. Just a little bit nothing crazy. Pattinson goes ok gimme 6 weeks. 6 weeks goes by he hasn’t done anything at all. I respect that so much.
