Chet (@NoCapCapitalLLC) / X

Chet

6,443 posts

Chet

@NoCapCapitalLLC

I still hold two league hockey records: most time spent in the penalty box, and I was the only guy to ever take off his skates and try to stab somebody

West Coast

Joined June 2020

Chet
@NoCapCapitalLLC
Mar 20, 2025
Just learned about how Chicago sold the rights to all of its parking meter revenue to the UAE for $1.1B in 2008. The city is currently collecting ~$150M/yr (and growing) in parking meter fees and then sends it straight to Dubai... Until 2083 What the fuck
Chet
@NoCapCapitalLLC
Jan 11, 2025
Just found out California spends $30B a year on benefits for illegal immigrants and just $3B a year on fire prevention. Lmao
Chet
@NoCapCapitalLLC
Apr 2, 2024
When you add nothing but “thank you” to the end of an hour long call
Chet
@NoCapCapitalLLC
Apr 27, 2024
“Bro Biden’s new tax plan is so dogshit”
Chet
@NoCapCapitalLLC
Jan 29, 2023
This guy at the bar last night told me he works at Goldman Sachs and when I told him I’ve never heard of it he started acting like I just pushed his grandma down the stairs
Chet
@NoCapCapitalLLC
Nov 27, 2024
When she asks “what’s my name?” after a few drinks and the moment is too big for you
Chet
@NoCapCapitalLLC
Jun 19, 2025
*10 drinks deep at a bar* Her: “what’s my name?”
Chet
@NoCapCapitalLLC
Jun 3, 2024
When the intern starts slurring his words at happy hour
Chet
@NoCapCapitalLLC
Feb 20, 2024
Instagram has made it way more common for older men to turn younger girls who are easily impressed by money into escorts. Extremely common phenomenon happening in New York right now. Ex used to get dms from older men like this all the time.
J⚡️
@jmbynx
Feb 19, 2024
Guys out here doing all this for ran thru puss Hoeflation is getting out of control
00:00
Chet
@NoCapCapitalLLC
Dec 24, 2024
If anyone is feeling sad, lonely, depressed or anything… I just want you to know I am feeling none of those things right now
Chet
@NoCapCapitalLLC
Oct 4, 2024
At this hotel bar convincing an older guy that Docusign has 300,000 employees that manually print and scan every single document due to federal regulations
Chet
@NoCapCapitalLLC
May 10, 2024
Damn that’s crazy. Must have been the same guy I met last year
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Chet
@NoCapCapitalLLC
Feb 5, 2025
At a hotel bar convincing this older couple that Docusign has 300,000 employees that manually print, sign, and scan every single document and this has all been secretly funded by USAID for years
Chet
@NoCapCapitalLLC
Apr 30, 2025
Homeless people that scream at people in passing and live in squalor (mentally and physically) should be placed in mental institutions against their own will. I’m done pretending it’s normal and ethical to have these people wandering around. Back to the psych ward lil bro