Don't!

Isaac's newest word lately is "Don't!" (Vehemently pronounced "DOH!," complete with an accusatory pointed finger to boot.)

At first, I wondered why this word, of all words, is his new favorite.

Then I realized. In the short space of two days, I found myself saying "Don't!" many times.

Here's a mere sampling of my recent "Don'ts!"

Don't:

Pick your nose

Bite your fingernails

Chew your toes

Slurp on your hair

Don't:

Push

Hit

Bite

Pull [Insert Name]'s Hair

Don't:

Fall down the stairs

Touch the hot stove

Open Windex and pour it on the carpet

Lock your sister in the bathroom

Don't:

Color your leg with black marker

Sneak chocolate at 7 a.m.

Growl at your mother

Throw your [huge] dump truck down the stairs

Don't:

Spit on your sister

Finger paint on the table with yogurt

Make a lake on the floor by the bathtub

Go pee pee on the floor in front of the potty

Don't:

Slime the (newly cleaned) door with food and fingerprints

Throw [books, yo-yo's, pencils] off the top bunk

Pound on the computer keyboard

Throw your plate across the room when done

Don't:

Dump out the entire bookcase

Wipe your nose on my pant leg

Throw lovey in the potty

Spit chewed-up string cheese on to the floor

Don't:

Put hair elastics in your mouth

Put Christmas ornaments in your mouth

Put open markers in your mouth

Put glue sticks in your mouth

Really, we ARE raising children--not animals. Just give us a few more years. Like thirty.