Last week..sigh

Last week was a series of falling off and getting back on the wagon.

I know I'm a serious emotional eater.  And that doesn't help me where I am now.

I started this week with another new resolve. And a new plan.

I used to make smoothies a lot. But I think they set me up to fail because I didn't get super full and then I was trolling the kitchen all afternoon looking for something to eat.

I don't do that on days we would go out to eat and get a big vat o' salad. So thanks to the scare about romaine being over, I bought two big bags of it (and boo coodles of salad veggies). And plan on eating a big vat 'o salad several times this week for lunch. It's easy and it keeps me away from the greens and fruit smoothies. Nothing wrong with them health wise..they are really good actually. But for right now and what I'm trying to do, I need to stick with the salads.

I made some homemade salad dressing similar to the salad place and I found a recipe online for  some vegan ranch. So hopefully I can enjoy my salads this week.

I did weigh this morning and I think by His grace to me alone, I lost a half pound.

Another thing I did differently this morning is spend *more* time in His word and with Him before I got the ball rolling on my day. I think that improved my outlook greatly today.

So there you have it. It's a new week. I hope I can curb my portions and 'be a good girl'. I really need to do it for my health..fat equals estrogen. And I really wanna fit back in my skinny jeans. 

the mascot

A couple of nights ago as I sat down to eat dinner, my hubs said he knew what I needed and left the table. When he came back, this is what he had.

Just seeing this little beanie baby made me go all ‘awwww’ and everything. You see, Bub was given this doggie during radiation. And of course, I’ve kept it nearby. (hubs snatched it off my dresser) But then hubs reminded me of his name…

Tiny! We all laughed at that. (and it took me 6 or 7 shots to be able to read the tag.. very tricky shot for a little point and shoot!)

I want to be tiny(er).

My plate is tiny.

My portions are tiny.

Hopefully my tummy (inside and out) will be tiny(er) too.

So Tiny still sits on the dining table.

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I checked out The Weigh Down Diet book the other day.

It’s been good to have a refresher on a lot of things. I used to have this book, along with the workbook and tapes from doing the study at church. That was so long ago that I’ve tossed all of it. So I was glad my library carried the book.

One of the things she talks about is a typical meal. And one word kept coming up during reading that I had forgotten about.

Dissecting.

I remembered about eating half. I remembered only eating the best looking chips and breaking one chip in pieces to eat it. And I even remembered eating one M&M in about 15 minutes by letting it truly melt in my mouth and then popping it open by pressing it against the roof of my mouth and letting all the warm chocolate ooze out. But I had forgotten about dissecting.

So today I put that back into practice. We ate lunch at McAlister’s. I got a half sandwich and a bowl of chili. I ate part of the sandwich. There was a lot of bread there, and not all were the choicest bites. I tore off bread bites that would be ‘just bread’. I hate dry bread bites. And as I ate slowly, I realized the half sandwich was looking bigger and bigger. So after a while, I opened my sandwich and ate the meats out with the toothpick that comes in it to hold it together. Then I ate a few bites of the pickle that come on the plate. I ate a little bit of the chili with the four crackers that came with it. I like cracker in every bite, so I broke up the cracker so I had a lot of mini-bites. I drank some of my tea and I was comfortably full. Of course, every meal put into practice looks different, but that gives you an idea.

I haven’t forgotten about the mainstream diet post. Stay tuned. : )

a visual aid

These are my plates.

Hub’s plate is on the left.

Mine is on the right.

Yep… it’s a breakfast plate.

But it really does help keep the portions lower. And then when I sloooow down to eat, I feel better at the end. Satisfied and yet I don’t feel like I starved myself either. My plate was ‘full’.

Tiny, but full.

the plan

So I guess it’s time to let you in on my little plan. I think there will be some rambling here as I sort my thoughts, so be patient. : )

The first diet I ever did was the Weigh Down Diet. Basically the physical mechanics of this diet are:

• eat half of your normal portion at each meal
• do not eat if you are not hungry
• wait for physical hunger to kick in before eating anything
• eat slowly, put your fork down between bites, and drink during the meal

But there is a whole other layer to this approach, which is the best part. When I used this diet before, it was very eye opening to me just how much I was using food to fill a void in my heart that only God can fill. And I think through the years, I tend to forget as I nibble a little here and eat a little extra there that eventually I’m right back where I started - using food in a way it was never intended to be used. It can become kind of like a god to me. I think about it. Crave it. Want it. Wonder when I can rendezvous with it the next time. Enjoy it’s company when I’ve had a bad day. Do you get the picture here?

Having said that, there are some things in the WDD that I don’t really agree with. She says to eat ANYTHING you want, as long as it falls under the parameters of hunger and polite fullness. Including bacon and chocolate. As a matter of fact, when I did this diet the first time, I tested out the bacon theory and ate about a pound of bacon within a few days. And yes, I did lose weight that week, just like all the others.

I certainly don’t recommend eating bacon. But on the other hand, I am not saying I totally avoid it either. Just keepin’ it real here girls. What I am saying is that I want to use these eating guidelines along with the idea of making smarter choices at the table in the first place.

I am planning on using the parameters of hunger and polite fullness to be my guide as I strive to eat less. I am also going to try to do without snacking. Most of the time I was just eating and wasn’t hungry… so unless I am HUNGRY, I will try not to snack. Like last night… I did have a snack later after dinner…but I had eaten a very light dinner and was feeling a hunger pang. I didn’t want to wake up feeling awful because I went to bed already hungry, so it is ok to eat a little something. So I did.

One of the things she encourages with this diet is to run to God and let HIM fill you through prayer and His word when you’re wanting to eat just to eat and aren’t hungry.

*A disclaimer: I am not a total fan of the Weigh Down Diet. Nor am I a “Gwen Shamblin groupie”. I know she has some spiritual ideas that many find questionable and I’m not going to get into that. I am just taking bits and pieces of what worked for me…both physically and spiritually… along with common sense to create something that I hope will work for me.

Next time… my issues with mainstream dieting, and the head games that go along with them.