How I Won the Love Lottery (and you can too)

Although I’m single now, I feel like I have more love in my life than I’ve ever had before ...

I feel like I won the Love Lottery!

This is a pretty big deal for me, because it wasn’t so long ago, that I struggled with depression, self-hatred and even suicidal thoughts.

If it is possible for me to cultivate great love and happiness, then I think it is possible for anyone.

Love is really about feeling deeply connected – to others, and to the world.

You don’t need a romantic partner to feel it. You just need to open your heart.

What allowed me to open my heart to love, 
was practicing the 5 tips that I’m sharing with you.
This is my Valentine’s Day gift to you.

1. LOVE YOURSELF
2. STOP PUTTING LIMITS ON LOVE
3. BE CREATIVE
4. SHARE YOUR PASSION
5. BE KIND

    1. LOVE YOURSELF

Isn’t it disappointing when others don’t give you the kind of love that you would most like to receive?

You can’t control what other people do. If there’s something you want, you’d better do it for yourself.

Are you treating yourself well? Are you taking care of yourself and your life?

Give yourself the love and kindness that you desire and deserve!

Are the thoughts that you direct toward yourself loving and kind?

Or do you have an Inner Critic who is hell-bent on attacking you? Pay attention to when this Inner Critic starts bad-mouthing you, and shut it down! 

When you love yourself, you take good care of yourself. You look after your health and well-being, your body, mind, surroundings and belongings. You seek out and cultivate happy healthy relationships, and walk away from those who don't support you.

Caring for yourself makes you feel strong and vibrant so you are up for the challenges, and able to help others.

   2.    STOP PUTTING LIMITS ON LOVE

If love means feeling deeply connected to others and to the world, then that means that love is limitless.

Why must we define love so narrowly, that we believe it must look a certain way, act a certain way, come in a certain package, or happen in a certain series of events?

We’re all familiar with the Hollywood and fairy tale fantasy of love and romance – complete with the kiss and “happily ever after” with the Princess and Prince Charming.

In this fantasy, both Prince and Princess merge with “The One” – their soul mate for life, who will be their eternal source of all love.

This is a cute fantasy, but it’s only one, super simplistic, concept of love.

What if, instead of searching to find love in “The One”, you sought to find love in “The Infinite” – seeking to find a love connection with every person you meet?

What if you aspired to love:

not just one other person, 

not just members of your family, 

not just friends, but 

the entire world? 

... including animals, plants, mountains and oceans, the stars, moon, and all of Nature, and all of existence?

It may sound radical, but this is the love I seek.

This is mystical love, universal love, or some might call it spiritual love.

And no, I haven’t gotten there yet! Not even close. I fail every single day.

But I’m working on it! I have my moments.

I've discovered that, just by opening your heart to this potential, it is possible to feel a constant flow of love in your life . . . which you will never get from focusing on just one other person.

Challenge your heart by loving more every day!

Here is an experiment to try:

Before going to sleep, visualize your heart shooting laser beams of love in all directions. These laser beams will strike other people in the heart, and bounce back at you!

See what happens in the next couple of days.

   3.    BE CREATIVE

Your creative self might sing, write poetry, act, tell jokes, dance, cook, sew, tell stories, build a house, start a business . . .

In creative mode, all your senses come alive. You become a sensual, feeling, perceptive and receptive, complete human being with a unique gift.

You allow others to see your true spirit, which is necessary to make authentic, loving connections.

Everyone is creative in some way. If you don’t feel creative, you just haven’t given yourself enough opportunity to explore that part of you, and find the mode that is your own unique creative expression. 

Start learning about yourself! Experiment, explore, try something new!

   4.    SHARE YOUR PASSION 

Whatever it is that you love – share it with others.

Connect with other people who appreciate the same things you do. 

Create your community.

Inspire each other, teach each other, support each other. 

This is your tribe. You need each other.

   5.    BE KIND

You aren’t the only one who wants love and connection.

Out in the world there is a sick person who wants a comforting touch; 
a homeless person who would like a genuine smile; 
a child who needs words of hope and encouragement;
a friend who needs someone to listen.

It doesn’t take a lot on your part to brighten a person’s day, or even change a life.

All it takes is kindness.

photo by Abdulhamid Al Fadhly

Let your own heart be the greatest source of love in your life. 

Watch it open and grow like a flower, and see what happens.

Happy Valentine's Day!

How do YOU create more love in your life? Please comment below!

Creative Collaboration

Lovebirds

watercolor by Rosa Phoenix

"Love is, above all, the gift of oneself."  

- Jean Anouilh

A few months ago, in the Fall of 2012, I partnered with the City of Phoenix, Arizona to teach free and low-cost art classes at senior centers.

My first experience teaching, it is the most wonderful collaboration.

Most of my students are beginners. Many have physical disabilities, or are recovering from illness, injury, trauma and grief.

They come to class with an open mind and heart. 

They are shy and embarrassed, because they don't yet know how to draw or paint. 

They are drawn to my classroom because something in them wants to create, express the beauty around them and within them, and to learn the skill of the artist. 

They know instinctively, that creative expression is their birthright as humans.

"We can do better than I can."

- Lykke Li

I think the highest form of creativity is collaboration.

The spark of energy exchange that happens when two or three or more share their ideas, is so much greater than what one person can accomplish alone.

That's why I love teaching so much.

To be able to share my love of art, and to teach people the skills to create their own works of art, makes my heart happy.

My students greet me shyly and say, "I can't draw," or "I can't paint." 

Within half an hour, they are happily drawing or painting, and watching themselves do it with amazement.

Their sense of sight, and their observation skills awaken. 

Suddenly, they are looking around them at their familiar world, now rich with colors, shapes and shadows that they had never noticed before. "It's beautiful!" they say.

Their ordinary world becomes an extraordinary world, because they now have an artist's vision.

Lotus Pond

acrylic painting 

by Rosa Phoenix

Wouldn't it be wonderful, if we could live this way every day?

We can . . .

. . . be the student, with open mind and open heart, willing to learn, willing to improve, aspiring to a higher expression . . .

. . . be the teacher, willing to share the skills and knowledge with others . . .

In my daily work, I do both, teaching and learning, sharing and collaborating.

My students continually inspire me with their dedication and motivation. They inspire me   because they make so many contributions themselves: volunteering, teaching and giving, with all their hearts.

We share our best selves with each other. Let's keep doing this, and uplift the world.

June is the Month of Roses

photo by Rosa Phoenix

"A rose by any other name would smell as sweet."

- William Shakespeare

The magnificent Rose! Queen among flowers.

What could be more sensual, sweet and intoxicating, than these soft heavy blooms, gently opening to release their fragrant perfume?

In delicate hues ranging from creamy whites and pale yellows, to pastel pinks, peaches and lavenders, to deep scarlet red, and framed by glossy green leaves, they are among the most attractive flowers in the garden.

Yet one must be careful, and beware of the thorns.

The rose is a symbol of romance, passion, eternal love, and feminine beauty.

Wherever roses are present, they will bring a sense of grace, pleasure and relaxation.

There are so many ways to enjoy roses. Freshly cut roses in vases will beautify and perfume your home. The flower petals can be scattered across a table or a pathway, for a special celebration like a wedding. Or they can be sprinkled in a bath for fragrant and luxurious experience.

You can cook with roses, using candied rose petals or rose water, or drink rose hip tea.

Rose is one of the most blissful and heavenly fragrances, so naturally it is one of the most popular perfume scents, and used in aromatherapy and skincare products.

The rose doesn't only look and smell lovely, it will make you look and feel lovely as well.

There are many wonderful products using roses. Here are several that I especially enjoy:

Edgar Cayce's Rose Petals Rosewater. It is pure rose essence in special water. It comes in a mister bottle, just perfect for spritzing it over the face and neck on a hot day, or whenever you need a mood-enhancing spray. It is pure enough to be used as a flavoring for foods and drinks. It makes me feel happy and beautiful!

L'Occitane Rose 4 Reines perfume. What a gorgeous full rose scent.

Dr. Hauschka Rose Day Creme. A rich and protective moisturizer for sensitive, dry or mature skin. Feels cool and soothing. It is formulated for the face but it is also nice to put on the hands. A precious substance, each 1 oz. tube contains the essence of 30 roses.

Here are some places to visit, that are known for rose gardens:

Portland, Oregon, U.S.A. is known as the City of Roses. It is home to the International Rose Test Garden.

Read about the Rose Festival of Kazanlak, Bulgaria. This region is one of the world's major producers of the highest-quality rose oil. Roses have been cultivated there for 300 years.

David Austin Roses, breeders of English rose varieties, has rose gardens in Albrighton, U.K. and has compiled a list of recommended rose gardens in the U.S.

How will you celebrate the month of Roses?

The Human Heart

 

Into the Deep

collage by Rosa Phoenix

The tragedy in Japan brings worry, despair, a sense of uncertainty and powerlessness. 

A reminder of how close we are to death, at every moment.

At the same time, it shows us how all people, and all life, are inter-connected.

I didn't learn about the earthquake and tsunami from the TV or Internet news. A woman I met only once sent me a text message, asking if I have family or friends in Japan. Her text message read: "we are all related as a human family."

I was touched that this woman, who I barely know, reached out to show her concern and caring.

I have friends in Japan. They are safe and alive, and for that I am thankful.

How much can change in an instant. 

Tragedies like this can make us feel closer than ever. The truth is that we need each other. In suffering, in times of difficulty, we bond and grow closer. Our ties grow stronger. We reach out for help and comfort one another.

Here is something my father wrote, after an earthquake in Taiwan in 1999:

With the reminiscence of all the disastrous events, natural or otherwise, that happened in the world in the past and present, I cannot help but think that even as advanced as the science and technology of today, we are still very vulnerable to all kinds of destructions.

On the other hand, we, the humans, have survived all those disastrous events for millions of years without any knowledge of modern science and technology. Why? Because we are the humans and have the HEART OF HUMANS.

From this very humans' heart, mutual assistance, sympathy and sacrifice for others were generated and converted into insurmountable forces and energy that kept humans surviving throughout all kinds of catastrophes.

I therefore come to the conclusion that we, the humans, have been and will be suffering from, but will not be destroyed by any extraneous forces.

However, we can destroy ourselves once this very existing humans' heart is lost.

- Dr. John T.K. Wang

The power of the heart, of our compassion and desire to help others, is our greatest strength. I hope that we will keep developing this power. 

Reach out in love, make the bonds stronger and the world smaller. Nothing else matters.

I Follow My Heart

Heart Fire
photo by Abdulhamid Al Fadhly

Happy Rosa Phoenix Day! 

Today is Valentine's Day as well, a time to celebrate love and romance.

Today is also the one year anniversary of launching my business, Rosa Phoenix Art & Design.

It's also time to celebrate a new year (the lunar new year was on Feb 3 -- I launched my business on the lunar new year 2010). 

It's a good time to take note of a change, and the beginning of a new cycle.

I moved back to my hometown of Phoenix, Arizona.

This was after living for 10 years in the San Francisco Bay Area, and prior to that, New York City.

I left Phoenix and my family at age 18, to see the world and live a life of my own.

I quickly adapted to big city life in New York and San Francisco, met lots of people, learned about other cultures, and made great connections everywhere I traveled.

Everywhere I went, I found love . . . in the form of friends, neighbors, romantic partners, and even kind strangers who helped me.

My heart went through its own changes.

It grew with love, it shrank with fear, it broke with sorrow, it strengthened with courage and resolve, it reached out to others when they needed caring, and it even broke others' hearts, through carelessness or cruelty.

My heart has been transformed by all these experiences and interactions with other people. I feel that now it is a stronger and wiser heart, growing and expanding more all the time.

I follow my heart. It constantly leads me to new places that are full of risk and renewal. My heart leads me on my journey as an artist, a twisting and turning path where nothing is known or secure. Yet this is what makes me happy.

My heart also leads me away from my comfortable and familiar life, and many people I love and care about. This makes me sad because I miss them, but I also have faith that my heart is leading me to the place where I need to be.

I trust my heart to guide me.

Now my heart is leading me back home.

I am returning, 18 years after I left, to live with my family again in Phoenix. It definitely feels like a full cycle has been completed, and a new one is starting.

For some time now, I've been having visions of the Arizona desert, its colors and textures and vast open spaces. Arizona is forever a part of me. It called me back, and I responded to the call.

I'm looking forward to the new adventure, whatever is in store for me.

Valentine's Day is a day to celebrate the heart and the people you love. I always follow my heart, and my heart led me back home. Love is here with me, where it has been waiting all along.


What does "follow your heart" mean to you?