Long overdue on a good rambling session don't ya think?

OMG I leave for a few months and Blogger goes and changes its interface and its all pretty and new and it makes me feel like I don't belong. HA!

I probably don't. 

I am sure I piss off the regular bloggers. 

But that's not what this is about now is it.

Apparently if you want to be all into FREE social networking you need to be okay with change.  Which is funny because people hate change.  And yet it seems all people are social networking.  Maybe Mark Zuckerberg is single handidly going to change that in the world.  Now that would be an interesting movie.

Can you believe my baby is 6 months old?  I am pretty sure I haven't REALLY blogged since she was an infant.  She is wayy too big.  And wayyy to sweet.  She is the kind of baby that if she was the first born you would for sure have a dozen.  You not me.  But she sure does make it tempting.

Oh but she doesn't really like to sleep.  So excuse me if I misspell words and sort of sound crazy at times through this post.  I am a bit dizzy and delirious most of the time now a days.

Worth it. 

And JD is FOUR!  How did that happen?  I am a mother of a child.  Not a baby.  Oh and speaking of that I have CHILDREN.  Not child.  Children. 

And yet I still act like teenager or 20 something most of the time.  Not with the drinking and the smoking.  But with my weirdness mostly.  And the laughing at my own jokes.  And the weirdness.

I can't wait until my kids can really appreciate their parents weirdness.  I seem to think they will totally dig it and will be laughing with US and not at us.  One can only dream.

And the reason I say "us" is because P-Daddy is just as weird and funny.  If not more so.  But don't tell him I said that because I like him to think I am the funniest and weirdest one around here.

I like to think that the two new hit shows New Girl and Up All Night are somewhat written about me and my life.  I am weird and funny like New girl (just ask me) and up all night is just my life! It just is, OKAY?! :)

So I mentioned this to some of my friends last week but think its definitely worth saying here.

I blogged a lot about how being a SAHM and how it was hard and all that jazz.

Who was I kidding?

Working mom status is the hardest.  And I will tell you why.  You work and have all of that responsibility and have to be on your A game and all professional and smart cause they don't care if you were Up All Night (see how I worked that in there...told ya) or still smell like spit up and snot...nope.  They need you at your best all the time. 

And then there is the guilt.  The mom guilt that you aren't there every waking second with your children ensuring that they know they are loved and adored and nurtured.

And then there is the pangs that you AREN'T there seeing every little amazing thing that your children do each day.

And then there is laundry, and cooking a HEALTHY dinner and trying to spend time with your husband and time for yourself and then there is your friends.  Basically you become a bad friend.  I will say it.  And then you have guilt about that.

And I don't have to get ready for work.  I am pj casual everyday.

And my mom watches our kids.

And every other week I have a cleaning service that changes my sheets and makes my home squeaky clean and beautiful.

And yet its still really hard.  Do I sound like I am complaining?

I am not.  I like my life (can't you tell?!-HA!).  I am happy with the decision to be working.

I am better when I work.

But the moms and dads out there that get up after no sleep and get themselves ready, their kids ready, drop their kids at a daycare somewhere and are at their desk by 8am.  Well, they are my new hero's.

Seriously.

Moving On...

I have officially diagnosed myself with a MILD (okay maybe moderate) case of OCD.  P-Daddy and I had the whole day to ourselves (basically) yesterday and we both decided to spend the day completely organizing our lives.  Relax cause we get no sleep..nahhh!  Lets maticulously organize the tool box in the garage (if you are wondering, no it wasn't P-Daddy-it was me), medicine cabinet, and our master bedroom closet.  Oh and don't forget loading up three large boxes of kids clothes (tear) for Goodwill. 

Or the fact that before P-Daddy and I had a little get-away I labeled all of Baby J's drawers and made the below (which is just one page of the entire binder I left for our precious babies caretakers that weekend). 

Not to mention that this month alone I have re-arranged our living room twice.  Last month-once.

Apparently OCD is currently how I am dealing with my issues.  HA!  Better that than Marlboro Ultra Lights right?!  Can I get an AMEN?

P-Daddy and I did get away recently to go and watch our great friends get hitched.  We made a long weekend out of it and spent some quality time with each other and friends.  It was awesome and much needed.

I haven't laughed that hard in a long time. 

At other people's jokes that is. 

I laugh that hard all the time at my own of course.

We have great friends. 

And that's all I got for today.

On why I think Rob Lowe is a Smart Cookie

So I have been totally sucked in to Oprah's FINAL 25 shows...which happened to include the interview of Rob Lowe. Who, by the way, I do not find dreamy at all. Except for his recent cover on Vanity Fair. That was pretty hot. But as a general statement, not so dreamy.

If I am going to get a choice in a celebrity man, I would rather have myself some Matthew McConahay. But thats just me.

But I digress...

So ROB said two things on Oprah that I found very smart that I thought I should share because for whatever reason they have not left my brain since I heard them come from his non dreamy mouth.

The first is a comment he made about his wife, his marriage. He said (not quoting, just generalizing here) that he and his wife try and find things to do TOGETHER not A PART. Sounds simple enough, right? Sounds like what people would DO in a marriage. Or that it would be what comes easy to two people who decided to spend their life TOGETHER right?

I heard this and thought "RIGHT ON BROTHER" and "PREACH IT" because I live in that same sort of marriage. And I was that girl that entered in my marriage thinking that all marriages were ones where the two involved really loved to spend actual time together. That they enjoy. But honestly I have very few friends, acquaintances, co-workers, you name it that enjoy spending time with their significant other. Or maybe enjoy isn't the correct word. Maybe its that when given the opportunity to spend time with someone, the first choice is not their significant other.

So whatever that means.

And they look at me funny when my first choice IS P-Daddy.

My marriage is NOT perfect. Well not perfect to you or if you knew all the ins and outs you would say it wasn't. But I have come to know that its messy perfect to ME and really, that is all that matters. I am happy that when Mr. Rob Lowe said that he would rather spend time with his wife than a part I could smile and know exactly what he was talking about.

Preach it Rob.

I hope people listen to him, on Oprah, in his book...because his wife, lets be honest is not what I would consider "Hollywood perfect" and yet Mr. Bratpack dreaminess thinks she is the most awesome woman ever.

Go him.

Onto the second point that I think makes Mr. Rob Lowe pretty smart.

He said (and again not quoting) that there comes a time in ones life where feeling youthful becomes work and its a choice that everyone makes a choice to live youthfully or start to live like an old fart. HA! He didn't say the fart part at all...just how I interpreted it. And the context was not botox or looks, it was on a question she asked him about how much energy he has and how excited he seems about life.

That really spoke to me for some reason. Probably because I just had our second child (which sort of makes me feel old), I am close to being 10 years removed from college and I am no longer in my 20's. But the funny thing is I tell my dad all the time that you are only as old as you feel.

And I don't feel OLDER.

I feel great, full of life.

Ready for the journey. Like I always have been.

But I don't ride around in my teal Lebaron convertible anymore singing as loud as I can whenever I want just to clear my head.

And I don't write in my journal like its a person and tell it exactly how I am feeling all of the time about every little thing.

I don't run miles and miles just to feel great anymore either.

I don't walk into a room full of 30 somethings and feel anywhere NEAR as confident as I did when I walked into a room full of 2o somethings in college.

So its a bit MORE work to keep ME full of beautiful LIFE.

Sing it ROB, sing it.

Oh and thanks for telling this to Oprah while I am 30. :)

I might be a wee slap silly with tiredness (I know you are sick of me talking about it but this but this sleeplessness is serious business) but I think Rob Lowe may just be a smart cookie.