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You've been working with the same team for over a year and you feel like they are family. You think you can go clubbing with one colleague, discuss your love life with the other and exchange recipes with the third. That's great, except that it might not be the best idea.
Now we're not suggesting you become a conceited little stuck-up. All we're saying is not to let your guard down too quick.
Take a look at our tips on how to deal with colleagues in different scenarios. They'll help you fit in without crossing those invisible boundaries.
When bonding over the boss...
He's a taskmaster and everyone cribs about him. So it seems like a good idea to cuss behind his back and poke a little fun at him too. Just don't be surprised the next day when your boss stares at you so hard, he could burn you down to a cinder. It's probably your colleague who donned the wings of "the little birdie."
If your dragon boss yelled his head off at you for no apparent reason, that's your cue to let off a little steam. But don't make gossiping about the boss or exaggerating/ inventing stuff about him a habit.
When you're invited for a party...
So you've tuned your antennae to detect kiss-ups, slackers and the likes, so you can avoid them. But don't distance yourself completely. If you're invited for dinner with the group, don't turn down the offer. You don't want them to think you're uptight, now do you? Plus, it's a great opportunity to get your colleagues to warm up to you and for you to decide which ones you need to be careful about.
But remember, just because it's after hours, doesn't mean it's okay to let your guard down completely. Watch what you say and how you behave; after all, you will have to see them in office tomorrow!
When you're part of a team...
So you think you are the best at what you do. Sure; you probably are. But you are not the boss – not yet at least. If your boss has assigned a task to someone, you don't need to doubt your team mate's abilities. Instead, focus on what has been assigned to you. Stop trying to play mother hen to your colleagues. Handholding them or doing their work is not your job! You don't get brownie points for that. In fact, you'll either get nicknamed "the bully" or become the doormat.
But while you are staying focused on your work, remember, it's always good to lend someone a hand now and then. They might just return the favour.
When you're at the lunch table...
The lunch break is the only respite your colleagues get from work all day so for heaven's sake don't bring business into the cafeteria. Wait till after lunch to tell your colleague to send you that email or complete the job she started yesterday.
Use your lunch break to get to know your colleagues better. Ask about their hobbies, their opinions (on topics other than work) or where they like to shop. Just make sure not to be too invasive.
When you're in a crisis...
When your marriage is collapsing, your kids are driving you up the wall or your mom is in hospital, it's just not possible to put on a brave face at work. You might have moments when you look less than happy. And there'll be plenty of people who are concerned or at least pretend to be. That's not your opportunity to tell all. Find a friend out of office for that.
If you have a very close friend (by that I don't mean your Friday night drinking buddy), you could share certain details about your private life. Just make sure not to obsess all day or you will quickly become "the leech."
Have any more tips to share? Leave a comment. Let's talk about it.
